Best Futurama Quotes

[Reply #200 on:]

@ Carbito
Bender: This is the Brooklyn bound B-train makin local stops where ever the hell I feel like it, watch for the closin doors... **Bim bom**

[Reply #201 on:]

Bender: Oh your God!

From Amazon Women in the Mood

[Reply #202 on:]

Space Pilot 3000

Fry; Can i ask you a question?
Leela; As long as it isn't about my eye
Fry; Ummmmmm
Leela; Is it about my eye?
fry: Sort of.
Leela; Just ask the question
Fry; What's with the eye.

[Reply #203 on:]

Amy - What happened to my parasol?
Bender - I dunno, but it wasn't there when I took your umbrella.

[Reply #204 on:]

From 'Xmas story', when Fry and Leela are hiding from Santa.

Leela: "We're trapped!"
Fry: "I never thought it would end this way!Gunned down by Santa Claus! ...Honestly, I didn't see it coming."

Then, when santa is inside the P.E. building:

Santa: "You've all been very naughty, very naughty indeed!!  Except you, doctor Zoidberg, this is for you."
Zoidberg: "A pogo stick!Mmmmm, hihihihihi!"

[Reply #205 on:]

Loves labours lost in space.

Leela: The planet is going to implode in approximately 2 hours ago .

[Reply #206 on:]

Space Pilot 3000

Fry: Is that blimp accurate.
Leela: Yes it's December 31 2999.
Fry: Oh my god, a million years

[Reply #207 on:]

 

Originally posted by Carbito:

Also like how Morbo is talking about the "T-man" in that same episode.

morbo: morbo forgot how to say the letter that looks like a man wearing a hat.

newslady: that's a "t". it's pronounced "tah!"

morbo: hello little man. I WILL DESTROY YOU!

hehehehehehe (i hope that's accurate)
     

[Reply #208 on:]

 

Originally posted by Grim:
@ Carbito
Bender: This is the Brooklyn bound B-train makin local stops where ever the hell I feel like it, watch for the closin doors... **Bim bom**

LOL! I loved that quote because it's basically just how the subway operators act here in NYC... 

Another funny one is from the episode, "Love and Rocket". I haven't even seen it, but after reading it, I cracked up.

Fry: "How can you date a ship, anyway? It'd be like me dating a really fat lady and living inside her. And she'd be all like *makes ship noises*."
Bender: "Fry, in order for me to get busy at maximum efficiency, I need a girl with a big 400 ton booty." *bangs hand against side of ship*

[Reply #209 on:]

Farnsworth: I'm blowing you a kiss...!
Cubert: Argh! Take evasive action!
*Dwight and Cubert's ship flys around eratically*
Farnsworth: It's closing in on you, you can't avoid it...!
*Cut back to Farnsworth and Hermes*
Farnsworth:It's a cheek-seeker...and...gotcha!
Cubert(Off screen): Noooooooo!!! Pah, pah!

-Route Of All Evil

[Reply #210 on:]

Jurassic Bark:

Professor, lava, hot!

[Reply #211 on:]

Zoidberg: "Be careful with that Adelai, Leela, he's a doctor. They're very poor."
Leela: "Actually, most doctors are rich."
Zoidberg: "What! When did this happen? You're joking, right? That's not funny!!!"


Zoidberg: "And while you're under the knife, you could also get an ink pouch to help you escape your enemies."
Professor: "That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard, you imbecile."
Zoidberg: (squirt) "Woopwoopwoopwoop!"

Both of those are from The Cyber House Rules

[Reply #212 on:]

From "Insane in the Mainframe:"

Zoidberg: Listen to me, Fry. Just because you think you're a robot doesn't make you a robot. After all, I think I'm a doctor but that doesn't make me a doctor. These fancy clothes do.

Fry: Negative. I must be a robot. Why else would human women refuse to date me?

Leela: Oh... lots of reasons.

Fry: Bio units, terminate noise exchange. It is time for you to ingest sandwiches from my compartment. [Pulls out sandwiches from his pants]

(I like how Zoidberg pronounces "robot." )

---

Leela: I'm going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can.

Professor: You're going to do his laundry?

[Amy slaps him]

Leela: Fry, this is for you.  [Kisses him passionately]

Fry: Beep.

Leela: Oh, for God's sake!

---

From "Time Keeps on Slippin':"

Zoidberg: So, he's not perfect. You don't wanna end up old and lonely like ZOIDBERG! [Cries]

---

Zoidberg: Don't be so hard on yourself, Fry. You lost the woman of your dreams, but you still have Zoidberg. You all still have Zoidberg!

---

From "I Dated a Robot:"

Fry: So there's an infinite number of parallel universes?

Professor: No, just the two.

[Reply #213 on:]

Fry: Okay, my best friend's life is at stake. I can finally prove that I'm not a coward.

(Puts on a helmet)

Fry: Will you push me?

Leela: I already did.

[Reply #214 on:]

At last, war has made me a man.  WHEE!!!

[Reply #215 on:]

Bender:  I heard you were feeling blue, your old buddy Bender will cheer you up!
(Bender starts juking AND'a jiving)
(Fry then proceeds to sob uncontrollably in a humorous manner)
Bender:  Jeez, I gotta work on my act.

An Xmas Story

-For an inexplicable reason, I found this to be uproarious.

[Reply #216 on:]

   Anyone hit on this one???

   From THE CYBER HOUSE RULES:

   "Hey Bender... why are those kids following you???  You got candy stuck to your ass???"

[Reply #217 on:]

Yeah I love "robut" too, and especially the way Zoidberg refers to Bender as "robut" in The Deep South - "Hey robut old buddy!"

[Reply #218 on:]

There All Good!!!

[Reply #219 on:]

 

Originally posted by Denton:
There All Good!!!

           

-Prof:Oh a lesson in histroy FROM MR IM MY OWN GRANDPA lets get the hell outta here allready SCREW HISTROY!!-

[Reply #220 on:]

Well, I read through all the quotes to make sure these weren't there (and I'm kind of surprised):

"Holy nuts!" - Fry

"How is his wife holding up?  To shreds, you say." - Farnsworth

Fry: "Look Bender, this has nothing to do with you."
Bender: "That's impossible!"

"Now, to begin the arduous task of attaching it to the ship so that... <timeskip> Off you go, apparently." - Farnsworth

[Reply #221 on:]

"I've never seen him this upset.. or ever before." -Scruffy

[Reply #222 on:]

I forget what Scruffy says in the AOI II with Leela... But he looked funny as hell!

[Reply #223 on:]

Marv Albert: "A dark day for humanity folks. We have been beaten, …in basketball."
Globetrotters: "Yeah that's how we do it" *laughter*
Bubblegum: "You are all fools of the highest caliber!"
Leela: "I don't know what you did Fry, but once again, you screwed up! Now all the planets are gonna start cracking wise about our mamas."
Hermes: "I'm just glad my fat, ugly mama isn't alive to see this day."
Prof. Farnsworth: "Enough about your promiscuous mother Hermes. We have bigger problems."

[Reply #224 on:]

"That's no flying saucer!  That's my ASS!"
-Bender "Roswell that Ends Well"

[Reply #225 on:]

How could you all forget

"And Zoidberg picks up another piece of garbage the crowd goes wild..... *Cheers*"

[Reply #226 on:]

I like this phrase

Leela: Hey, hey, hey! We can all fight when we're drunk. Now listen, why don't we just brew our own beer?
Bender: You can brew your own beer?
Leela: Sure. The kids at the Orphanarium used to do it all the time.
[Bender's head flies off, revealing a spring]

- From Route Of All Evil

[Reply #227 on:]

Hermes: "He'd be as strong as Gumby and Herculies combined!"

Zoidberg: "Gumbergulies?! I love that guy!"

- from Parasites Lost

[Reply #228 on:]

this is one i think is very funny, from Brannigan begin again.

kiff (to leela, of zapp): this one time he actually forced me to, shave his armpits while he was in the bathtub, so i said-
leela (bored): could we talk about something other than zapp?
kiff: oh...ok...um....how about them-um....well there he was in the tub...

hehehe that was a great quote   

 

Originally posted by ssj:
Hermes: "He'd be as strong as Gumby and Herculies combined!"
Zoidberg: "Gumbergulies?! I love that guy!"

- from Parasites Lost
 

hehehehe, brilliant!    
------------------
oh my, no.   

[Reply #229 on:]

The one qoute that I keep playing back in my mind is from "Roswell That Ends Well".  When Fry is looking in the side mirror of the jeep, he sees the explosion and gasps.  Bender proceeds to say "AND YOUUUUU ARE OUTTAAA HERREEEEE!"  Cracks me up everytime.

[Reply #230 on:]

Birdbath In Ice-catraz

Congratulations Wiggles!  You just earned yourself and invitation to the Captains Table!
"pssss, ooooh the Captain's Table, what  an  honor!"

Lmfao, Zoiberg never fails.

[Reply #231 on:]

lmao then their is Farnsworth.  Don't remember the episode name but it went something like this:

Farnsworth: Come here everybody.  I have something important to show you.
(later they are on his bed
Farnsworth: Gather around everybody.  Take a look!
Everybody:Wow!
Fry: Can I touch it!
(short time later)
Farnsworth: Perhaps we should go to a more comfortable spot.  To my bathtub.

Lmfao, the rest of the scene he explains everything laying naked in his bathtub.  It cracks me up everytime.

[Reply #232 on:]

From A Head in the Polls [2ACV03]

Morbo:Puny human number one, puny human number two, and Morbo's good friend, Richard Nixon.
Nixon: Hello Morbo, how's the family?
Morbo: Belligerant and numerous.
Nixon: Good man, Nixon's pro-war and pro-family.

I love just about anything that Morbo says and there was another in the same episode, "All humans are vermin in the eyes of Morbo"

I think Mother's Day [2ACV14] featured Morbo's Vermin of the Week. Why hasn't some website implemented this feature? It could have random website devotees featured as the Vermin of the Week.

[Reply #233 on:]

I got the R1 DVDs yesterday and laughed out loud at an exchange from "I, Roommate" I had forgotten.  Bender and Fry are in Bender's closet sized apartment for the first time:

Fry: Where's the bathroom?
Bender: The what room?
F: The bathroom.
B: The bath what?
F: The bathroom!
B: The what what?
F: Never mind.

God these DVDs are going to be fun!

[Reply #234 on:]

annnd the oscar goes tooooo...
1)parasites lost
and the part which is inpulsive leela in anthology of interest1.that was really good.
what you think???

[Reply #235 on:]

Simple line that cracks me up everytime is Zoibergs attack scream:

WoopWoopWoopWoop

[Reply #236 on:]

From "The Problem with Popplers"

Free Waterfalls Jr:  You shouldn't eat things that feel pain :brick hits him in head: OWW!
Bender: Ok, we wont eat YOU!
Leela:  Let's get some more bricks.

[Reply #237 on:]

"put two zeros in front of that, and u got a deal"

[Reply #238 on:]

LEELA: "All I ever wanted was parents to hug me,
stroke my hair, and tell me they loved me."
FRY: "Then today is your lucky day, cause I happen to be a huggin, strokin, lovin machine! Also spankin!"

[Reply #239 on:]

Cubert:Hmmm, There's a crack in the hull. That could cause explosive decompresion.
Dwight:Put a sticker on it.

The Route of all Evil.