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Author Topic: I hope you don't mind if I drabble a little while I work  (Read 2548 times)
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Layla50

Bending Unit
***
« on: 10-01-2005 01:13 »
« Last Edit on: 10-01-2005 01:13 »

Hmm... It's been so long since I've done this that I'm not sure I'm doing it right. Ah well, c'est la vie!

So, drabbles! For anyone who doesn't know, a drabble is a short story of a hundred words, no more no less. That is very short, so they promote really carefully writing and word choices. Some people have made quite an art form out of it, though I'm not one of them. I've never written one before in fact.

Drabbles are less about plot and more about ideas. They can be in any style or affect, meaning, comic, shippy, drama, drippy drama, etc.

There are also double and triple drabbles, of 200 and three hundred words. Drabbles are often written around challenges or themes. i.e. Someone says I want a drabble about... lobsters, and people can choose to tackle that subject in their own way. Lobsters for dinner, lobsters as poor miserable doctors, lobsters as evil invading aliens.

So, if you're interested, post a drabble or a challenge. I think it'll be very helpful too when the fanficcers get quiet. It's so much less intimidating to pop out a drabble than it is to write something with a plot.

I lied, here's one now.

Wink.

She has to keep her eye on him. Otherwise, she will feel him watching. Leela hates being watched, but that is the duty of the sane. Once she thought her mind would not survive that relentless watching, and still she endures.

However, if sanity fails it’s task, these guys may yet succeed. Most of them seem ready, frightened, yes, but ready.  He is different. He hadn’t been ready, and she know it. His eyes are open. He is blindness, staring into the unknowable future. Somehow, she can't turn her back on him, because she needs to see him

Blink.


NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #1 on: 10-01-2005 14:35 »
« Last Edit on: 10-03-2005 00:00 »

Nice!

I'll try to write one...

Humm! Don't have time now... I'll try later.

Superb idea Layla!


NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #2 on: 10-04-2005 10:40 »

  eek Wow, Layla posted that 3 days ago and no one but me as replied!


I have no choice but to try it out!  tongue

--------------------
-Sounds-

Since my awakening in this world, I was surrounded by new sounds. The first one I heard was the sound of the cryogenic tube door opening. Then I heard the sound of some cool looking flying cars and old style blimps coming from outside the building window.

Then I was standing in front of the source of the most beautiful sound I ever heard! It took a while to get around our problems but now I can’t spend a day without listening to this awesome sound! My heart keeps beating so I can hear the sound of her voice.

-----------------------


I hope that was the right way to write a drabble.

Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #3 on: 10-04-2005 11:05 »

Well she hasn't posted a challange yet. From what i understand someone posts a challange and then people write drabbles that meet that challange.
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #4 on: 10-04-2005 12:42 »

Oh! Ok then. Looks like I wrote that for nothing! Awwwwww! I wasted 15 min for nothing!
JBERGES

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #5 on: 10-05-2005 01:28 »
« Last Edit on: 10-05-2005 01:28 »

Here’s my challenge.  Someone write an understandable drabble using an even more crippling literary restriction than I have.

-----Nerve------

Another busy calendar.  Days, endless, fitfully gained heat into June.   

Kiddingly, Leela mentioned needing off-time. Perceivably, quitting (rightfully) seemed the ultimate vacation. Wearily yanking zipper and brushing coat dully, even Fry guessed her interplanetary job kept Leela miserable.  Needing only presumption, quashing rational second thoughts until victorious, ‘Wiggles’ youthfully zipped about, blithely collecting daisies, even finding geraniums hidden in Jamaican’s kiosk.  (LaBarbara’s man: Negative one present) Quietly reaching safety, the underdog vigorously waited.

‘You!”  Zealously announced Bender. “C’mon! Don’t escape, Fry! Get here immediately!”

Juxtapositioning knuckles, Leela metaphorically novaed on Philip, quickly reaching spiteful Turanga’s unpredictable vicinity.

“Where’ve you...”

...Zam?

----------------

That took far too long to do...
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #6 on: 10-05-2005 01:55 »

This is all way too hard for me to even attempt.
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #7 on: 10-05-2005 02:21 »

You got that right Venus!
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #8 on: 10-15-2005 06:33 »
« Last Edit on: 10-15-2005 06:33 »

Drabbles, huh?  A sort of chopped-down vignette...okay, I'll bite.

(cracks knuckles)

(writes short bit...checks word count)

207?!  Dang!  This IS hard!

(picks up katana...)

(...half an hour later...)

Um...titles don't count in the word count, do they? 

(decides they don't, goes for broke)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In Liu of Love

Fry looked so...broken.  Leela longed to comfort him...but she didn’t dare.  So she followed him, silently.

He carried the blank robot all the way from the theater to the Planet Express basement.  He placed it on the slow conveyor belt that fed the Total-Conversion incinerator, gently crossed the thin metal hands over its chest, and kissed it on the forehead.

“I’m sorry, Liubot,” she heard him whisper.  “But maybe it’s better.  I only loved you...because I can’t love her.”

Leela swallowed a sob.  She longed to comfort him...but she didn’t dare.

Silently, she crept away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #9 on: 10-15-2005 08:42 »

Nice Shiny!!!

That should have been in the show!
Layla50

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #10 on: 10-15-2005 12:29 »

Yay! Happy fun drabbles for me to read. Well, perhaps not happy drabbles, but you get the point. Sorry about disappearing for a bit.

I never intended to monopolize this thread by saying only I could post challenges. That would be a bad thing of badness. However, I did forget to post one, so sorry 'bout that.

Loved all three drabbles (excluding mine of course)even though I have no idea what the crippling restriction is for Bergey's. I know there's something different about it.. but I'm mystified.
Fell in shippy love with Shiny's (Heh, great title!) and enjoyed Nic's introspective "Sounds".

You guys are way too good at this. So anyway, I offer up a challenge at long last:

I'd like to see a drabble (or more than one) wherein a Futurama character discovers a shocking secret. Have at it!
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #11 on: 10-15-2005 12:58 »

Yes!!! Layla's back!!!!

Are you feeling better? I hope you do.

I’ll try your little challenge latter tonight. Don’t have time now. (I’m still at my job!)

Btw, I’m glad that you liked my little drabble.
Nerd-o-rama

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #12 on: 10-15-2005 15:00 »
« Last Edit on: 10-15-2005 15:00 »

Layls:

Author Berges couldn't describe everything, for gallantly, heroicly, intelligently, John kept listing more nonsense (on point, quite ravishing sense) to understand very well...xciting...young Zen alphabetical bliss.
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #13 on: 10-15-2005 22:47 »

Layls, I admire you drabble, the words flow nicely but I have to confess...I'm not "getting" it.  I assume Leela is thinking about Fry (though you don't actually mention his name, I've tried some other characters and none that I've hit on seem to "work" either wink and it seems in character for them but some of the references...the "duty of the sane" thing and "these guys may succeed" and others...are escaping me.  My best guess is that it's Leela's impressions just after Fry comes out of Cryo, but there's a line that seems to reference The Sting perhaps.  I'm confused.  Help?

NIC, I like yours a lot.  Nice take on the impressions of a single sense, and the "Fry voice" seems just right.  Cool-o-rooni.

JBerges, you get points for making it coherent, but the restriction makes the story itself sound very stilted.  I tried to think of a restriction tighter than that, but I couldn't...let alone imagine what story I would tell with it if I did!  You get the award for technical achievement, for sure.

Thanks everyone for your comments on mine.  It's actually a distilled version of a vignette I've been trying to write for some time. I'm deliriously proud of the title, (thanks Layla!)...it took me quite a while to come up with it (and I can't ever quite get the concept of a story down until I at least get something close to a good title), but even after that the actual vignette kept stalling out; I kept miring myself in the details.  Paring it down to 100 words was good in one way (forced me to concentrate only on the essentials) but bad in another (I left out some "cool stuff" I wish I didn't have to).  So I really I wish I'd re-read your original post because I might have done better making it a double drabble...or even a triple.  Ah, well, so it goes.

I'm currently trying to think of a shocking secret.  Though nothing is revealing itself yet.  Check in with you guys later...
Futurama Nerd

Professor
*
« Reply #14 on: 10-16-2005 17:00 »

Wow you guyz! I like! But I have to admit, I really liked Shiny's. Great job! I'll try this later on, I've got homework to do!
Layla50

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #15 on: 10-16-2005 17:54 »

Well, don't I feel like an idiot. Thanks, N-o-r, I can't quite believe I missed that. I am 26 times more impressed, Bergey.

Shiny, my vague and confusing drabble is set before Fry wakes up in the future. "These guys" refers to the, if I may borrow a term, corpsicles, that Leela got to hang out with. Like you, I wrote something longer and then ruthlessly chopped out everything that made sense... except yours still makes sense.  smile
The Pizzazz

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #16 on: 10-17-2005 09:39 »
« Last Edit on: 10-17-2005 09:39 »

~Green~

An ancient secret encumbered with musky scent. A stark, compact sentence.The sharp characters seemed to cut his retinas as they did the stone they were etched. Fourteen words: Here lies Philip J. Fry, named for his uncle, to carry on his spirit. The serendipity dragged him into its torrentous grip; froze him more than cryogenics.

A robot passed a clover into Fry’s deadened hand. The rambunctuous robot and vivid-haired cyclops were reduced to two immaterial smudges on his vision: warm tears trailing the cold skin of his visage. Zen-like, he slowly knelt; allowed the clover descend back into the abyss.

~~~

Title included, 101 words. So don't count the title ;o
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #17 on: 10-18-2005 12:30 »

Ok I've made one for Layla's challenge.
(Timeline: Just after the sting!)


My face


Apartment 1I… It was almost empty and without secret. Nothing like her!

She was still weak so he offered is help to her. He did so much for her lately but it didn’t matter. He got up early and ran to help for her return at work. She told him that she forgot her keys in her room and he went to get them. He found them on the desk in front of a picture of his face.   

Returning with the keys and a large smile, he now knew that she would be fine. He was always with her now!


Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #18 on: 10-18-2005 19:34 »

awwwwwwww!
Layla50

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #19 on: 10-22-2005 14:45 »

Second. That's really sweet, Nic.

And now for somethign completely different. I decided to try something for my own challenge.
------------------------------------------------
         Hermes stared at the file in horror.
“Sweet barracuda of old Bermuda!” The bureaucrat bolted into the employee lounge, startling the slackers.
   “It’s from the Interspecies Medical Association! Response to request for degree replacement! That cracked crustacean did lose his degree in a volcano!”
         Leela cocked her head thoughtfully, “I’d say the bigger surprise is that he had a degree at all.”
        Zoidberg expressed his mild pleasure at receiving the copy of his license by running around squealing “whoop, whoop, whoop!”
        “He’s got an actual license. Now we’re going to have to start paying him in something besides dead owls!”
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #20 on: 10-22-2005 16:44 »
« Last Edit on: 10-22-2005 16:44 »

LOL!

Nice one Layla!

Glad you liked mine. (also thanks Venus)

I've got another one coming soon.

Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #21 on: 10-22-2005 18:31 »

That's hysterical Layla! I love it!
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #22 on: 10-22-2005 19:35 »

Hey Venus, why don't you give it a try?
I'm sure that you could come up with something really good.

C'mon girl, you can do it!
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #23 on: 10-22-2005 20:17 »

I would, but i got nothin. I tried to think of something at work today but i'm all tapped dry.
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #24 on: 10-22-2005 23:37 »

Well you'll have a few days soon to think about it no?  tongue

Just kidding! But once you start on one of those, it's really easy to write under a few hours.

The last one I made took me a few minutes at work. (Something like 40mins between calls and paper works)

I'm sure that you'll think of something.
Layla50

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #25 on: 10-31-2005 19:45 »

Well, I went to my orchestra practice tonight dressed as a hobbit, why not, and I got to thinking about humiliation and embarassment.

So, I hereby lay down a challenge: Write a drabble or double drabble about a Futurama characters most embarassing/humiliating moment. Lots of potential for hilarity/ soul-crushing angst here so it should be an easy one to tackle.

If this gets a good response( oh, let's say three drabbles) I'll write one for each major character not already chosen.

Entertain me people!
Boltzmann_Fan

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #26 on: 11-02-2005 00:04 »

All right, I'll take that challenge:

The glint of translucent plastic caught his eye.  Zoidberg drooled, hardly believing his good fortune.  Before he could grab his prize, a small hand snatched it away.  A young street urchin had stolen his feast! 

“Young lady, I believe that’s my sandwich.”  Zoidberg didn’t usually squabble with children, but he hadn’t eaten since the previous Tuesday.  “Could we work out a deal?  You could give me half the sandwich, perhaps?”

“Screw you crabby!”  The girl wriggled free from his grasp, and stamped down hard on his claw.  A swift uppercut to the jaw left the lobster-doctor reeling.  Zoidberg had lost.

(That was a lot harder to write than I thought it'd be)
DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #27 on: 11-02-2005 03:05 »

'Dypstic Pizza' a double-drabble.

“How did I learn it?” Fry asked.

He was stalling.  Small talk at a party had led Leela to ask him about learning to make pizzas in the 20th Century.  He was proud to be a child of the Stupid Ages.  Who wouldn’t be?  But the learning curve for pizza manufacturing was extremely steep, or at least it had been for Fry.

“Making pizzas is like making love, kid.” Mr. Pannucci had told him.  “You got to take your time and build things up before you get to the good stuff.”

“Then what?”

“15 minutes at 450 degrees.”

Things had not gone well.  The reason for Pannucci’s no-gum policy was pretty obvious, or at least it was for everyone except Fry.

In mid-knead gravity took its toll on Fry’s slack-jawed look of concentration and relieved his mouth of its award-winning wad of Big League Chew.  Fry didn’t want to spoil his chewing pleasure with floury hands, so he bent low over the near-pizza and opened his mouth.  Realizing you have to sneeze should be as easy as not running into a pizzeria’s front door, or at least it should have been for Fry.

“Ummm...My face was stuck in a pizza.”
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #28 on: 11-02-2005 11:08 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by DrThunder:
*“Making pizzas is like making love, kid.” Mr. Pannucci had told him. “You got to take your time and build things up before you get to the good stuff.”

“Then what?”

“15 minutes at 450 degrees.”
*
  laff LOL! That was so funny! This is Fry at his best! laff


 Boltzmann_Fan: Great stuff man! Poor Zoidberg... His ass got kicked again!  big grin

Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #29 on: 11-10-2005 22:25 »

I was talking to Layla about a half hour ago and we started talking about this thread. She gave me permission to post a little drabble challange of my own. So here it is:

Cut scenes. Like the deleted scenes on the dvds. Pick an episode and write what the viewers didn't get to see.

Layla's earlier challange still stands though.
Officer 1BDI

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #30 on: 11-10-2005 23:49 »

*pokes head in*

This is really hard.  hmpf  I don't think my drabble's very concrete, or at least not as solid as the others here.

Here's a scene from "Love and Rocket."  It's a double-drabble because I completely forgot about the first few posts and went by DrThunder88's word count.   tongue

Sacrifice

She looked into those tired, thankful eyes of his and was overcome by a wave of aggravation.

“That was a stupid thing to do,” Leela frowned as she helped Fry into a kneeling position.  He opened his mouth to retaliate, but the words failed to form before he wobbled uneasily and pitched sideways.  Leela caught him and held his shaky form in place.

“I feel dizzy,” he murmured lamely, face drained of color. 

“Keep your head down.”  She gently pushed him forward, but her hand never left him.  Slender fingers brushed his neck, the pulse that had nearly stopped for hers.  “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Yes I did,” he argued hoarsely.  In the silence that settled, she pulled him into her, head resting against head.

The curious expression returned to his face long before the flush, eyes focused on chalk candy.  “Are you going to eat that, or can I?”

Leela fingered the damp heart, her sigh suppressed.  “I think I should hold onto this for a while.”  What she really wondered, as she pocketed the candy, was how she would arrange it in that homely shoebox beneath her bed to avoid crushing it between the other artifacts.
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #31 on: 11-11-2005 00:00 »

Aaaaaaaaaawwwwwwww I love that! Yay for Officer 1BDI coming back from the dead! May she hang around and bestow fanfic upon us!
FutureDramaQeen

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #32 on: 11-11-2005 15:11 »

My Drabble

"How was your honeymoon?"

-------

Wow. I can't beleive it; Married! At last I'm spending my lifetime with the man I love.

Nothing had gone wrong, which had surprised her. Knowing what he was like around breakable things in public, she had made back-up plans. But they weren't needed.

And now, with the better-than-expected reception over, it was just the two of them.

He lifted her up into his arms to carry her over the threashold to begin their life together.

He didn't see the rug just past the doorway. She didn't get out of the way of the dresser quick enough.

-------

"Urm..."

Her broken arm didn't hurt that much...

The End

I had to remove some of it, but I still might be over 100 words a bit. Sorry.
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #33 on: 11-11-2005 15:28 »

What episode is that supposed to be from? Time Keeps on Slippin?
FutureDramaQeen

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #34 on: 11-11-2005 15:48 »

It's for Layla's embarresing charecter moment challange. Well, it's meant to be.
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #35 on: 11-11-2005 16:10 »

Layla told me if i posted my 'cut scenes' challange i had to answer it myself. So here's my double drabble from Cyberhouse Rules:

~~~~~~~~~~
Surgical complications

"Okay, this is your head." Fry stated as he placed a large orange on the table. This earned him a raised eyebrow from the coffee drinking cyclops who was sitting beside him.

"Just go with me on this." The delivery boy held up a scalpel 'borrowed' from the medical bay. "This is your head and i'm Adlai."

Leela sat down her coffee mug deciding this demonstration might actually be of some entertainment value. She motioned for him to continue.

"I will now start with the 'y' incision."

"That's how you begin an autopsy, not plastic surgery."

"Oh..." Fry paused, then continued with his best 'professional' voice. "I will now start whatever letter incision they use for plastic surgery."

Fry carefully placed the scalpel up against the skin of the fruit, squinting in mock concentration and gently pressed down.

"AH-CHOO!" His hand jerked violently burying the scalpel deeply within the orange causing the pre-sliced fruit to fall to pieces. He regarded the carnage grimly.

"Next patient!"

"For crying out loud, he's not Zoidberg!" Leela stated as she reached for a slice and took a bite.

"I'm surprisingly tasty."

"Leeeeelaaaa you're not taking this seriously!"

"How can i?" She asked. "I'm citrus."

~~~~~~~~~~

This was surprisingly complicated.
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #36 on: 11-11-2005 16:17 »

LOL!!!!!!

It's about time you write one Venus!
And it is very good!
I could clairly see that scene in my head.


Btw, how's Layla?
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #37 on: 11-11-2005 16:20 »

She's fine. She's going out of town for the weekend so she won't be around till Mondayish. She hopes to have an update on 'Fry's Choice' out fairly shortly. And it's long as hell. Like 7 thousand words.
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #38 on: 11-11-2005 16:34 »

Nice to hear that.

Thanks Venus.
Crash_7

Professor
*
« Reply #39 on: 11-11-2005 16:56 »

Venus and Officer 1BDI:  Those are great!
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