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Author Topic: If you were in Terry's shoes...  (Read 720 times)
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TheLampIncident

Urban Legend
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« on: 04-12-2004 22:09 »

We all know Terry said "Welcome to the world of tomorrow!" to the new defrostees. We saw Fry and Bender with the wacky adventures in The Cryonic Woman. Now what would you say to new defrostees?

Personally, I think it would be hard to top "Welcome to the world of tomorrow!" but something along the lines of "Brains...brains!" like in those zombie movies would work just fine.

Notes: If this has been done before, close this thread. If you feel it needs to be moved to Offtopic, then do it. I'm not very good at starting new threads, which is why I only do it rarely.
Nixorbo

UberMod
DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #1 on: 04-12-2004 22:47 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by TheLampIncident:
We saw Fry and Bender with the wacky adventures in The Cryonic Woman.

That pretty much covers what I would do.

I have a thousand years of power.
"NOOOOO HE WAS MY BROTHER!" and then got tired and slept.


"He has the special talent, though, of being able to help people and make them feel utterly stupid all at the same time. ... In short, he's a great moderator, but a terrible human being."
-SlackJawedMoron
Nasty Pasty

DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #2 on: 04-12-2004 22:47 »

"Bathroom's that way *points*"

Hey, thats what the defrostees want to hear..
shoopbender
Bending Unit
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« Reply #3 on: 04-13-2004 00:24 »

Here's a coke. Here's a LazyBoy. Her's a TV with unlimited channels of any type. All you gotta do is search. That's what you came to the future for right?
HawkingHole4001

Bending Unit
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« Reply #4 on: 04-13-2004 00:26 »

"This is the year -4323... you've magically froze BACK in time! hahaha... but seriously, welcome to 3000!"
MrsBender

Bending Unit
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« Reply #5 on: 04-13-2004 01:59 »

I really like Bender's approach, with the gorilla or fly masks.  Clearly that is the best way to go. 
Ekarderif

Bending Unit
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« Reply #6 on: 04-13-2004 02:58 »

Actually I don't think defrostees would need to use a bathroom considering all body functions ceased, even the ones that produce urine.
MrsBender

Bending Unit
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« Reply #7 on: 04-13-2004 03:03 »

i guess the joke is that they've been asleep for 1,000 years, not frozen, and thus they'd have to pee REAL bad.
Bushmeister

Professor
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« Reply #8 on: 04-13-2004 07:02 »

I'd just give a simple "What up", or wear a nasty gorilla mask.
Woodbot 2.0

Starship Captain
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« Reply #9 on: 04-13-2004 07:31 »

"Welcome to te year 3000.
Now get the hell out."
evan

Urban Legend
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« Reply #10 on: 04-13-2004 07:38 »

"Welcome to the world of Tomorrow!!  Now, I hope you have the money to pay for the cryonics, otherwise you're going back in the tube."
futuramamama

Bending Unit
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« Reply #11 on: 04-13-2004 08:01 »

"They legalized all the stuff you wanted to do!"

Now that's what I'd want to hear.
tom123

Starship Captain
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« Reply #12 on: 04-13-2004 08:15 »

It would be pretty funny if I did what Bender did and wore a mask to scare them.
futuramamama

Bending Unit
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« Reply #13 on: 04-13-2004 08:25 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by evan:
"Welcome to the world of Tomorrow!!  Now, I hope you have the money to pay for the cryonics, otherwise you're going back in the tube."

What, untill they have the money?
This makes NO SENSE, Wiggles!
Zeep

Liquid Emperor
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« Reply #14 on: 04-13-2004 11:05 »

I'd probably just fall asleep and let the defrostees figure it out for themselves.
Gleno

Liquid Emperor
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« Reply #15 on: 04-13-2004 11:27 »

"Welcome to the future, thanks for choosing Applied Cryogenics....everyone you knew, loved and/or hated in the past is either dead or frozen....that'll be 500 dollars please.... big grin

"NEXT....!"

Let me break....let me break you down....for your sake....I will break you down...."[/small]
QueenOfRobonia

Bending Unit
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« Reply #16 on: 04-13-2004 11:35 »

Put on a pair of devil horns and say they died during the freezing process, and that for using such evil things as Cryogenics, they have to go to hell. Then lock them in a cupboard. Which would be funny just to see how long it took them to figure out what was going on.
SwanMan3000

Starship Captain
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« Reply #17 on: 04-13-2004 13:57 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ekarderif:
Actually I don't think defrostees would need to use a bathroom considering all body functions ceased, even the ones that produce urine.

But theyre frozen so maybe when they are defrosted all the water defrosts inside and they have to piss.
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #18 on: 04-13-2004 14:36 »

Give the defrostee a tired look and ask him with my most annoyed voice: "What the hell do you want?"

Or Terry's line, it's a classic afterall.
Nasty Pasty

DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #19 on: 04-13-2004 15:31 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by SwanMan3000:
 But theyre frozen so maybe when they are defrosted all the water defrosts inside and they have to piss.

And if you remember from "the cryonic woman" that defrostee looked pretty damn happy to be pointed in the direction of a bathroom.

I know i would...

Young_and_Angry

Professor
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« Reply #20 on: 04-13-2004 16:54 »
« Last Edit on: 04-13-2004 16:54 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by QueenOfRobonia:
Put on a pair of devil horns and say they died during the freezing process, and that for using such evil things as Cryogenics, they have to go to hell. Then lock them in a cupboard. Which would be funny just to see how long it took them to figure out what was going on.
Oh your God, I would have done that, too. Or Bender's appraoch. Can't beat the classics..or just point them to the bathroom.Or just say this: "Ok, so before you say it, I will for you. *Slams body to window and looks out.Fixes face into either freaked out/scared/amazed.* "Oh my god! The Future! My family, my friends, everyone I knew and loved and or hated is gone!" That'll be $25, bathroom's that way, then strip naked and get on the Probulator.Then, pay me a service charge of $10."

"Does not your scrotum need kicking?"
Coilette

Liquid Emperor
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« Reply #21 on: 04-13-2004 18:02 »

'Sorry we don't have a cure for that yet.'

I'd probably pull a few pranks similar to Bender's too.
Mouse On Venus

Liquid Emperor
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« Reply #22 on: 04-13-2004 18:06 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by QueenOfRobonia:
Put on a pair of devil horns and say they died during the freezing process, and that for using such evil things as Cryogenics, they have to go to hell. Then lock them in a cupboard. Which would be funny just to see how long it took them to figure out what was going on.

Or you could go further. Put on a white cloak and a big white beard, say you're God and that the defrostee has gone to heaven. Then, after lulling them into a false sense of security, remove the cloak and beard to reveal the devil costume, and you can guess where it goes from there...  evil laugh
Alliteration

Starship Captain
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« Reply #23 on: 04-13-2004 18:52 »

Before they woke up, I would move their tube to LA, like in Cryonic Woman.

Just let them wander around in that wasteland for a few days...
Nasty Pasty

DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #24 on: 04-13-2004 18:54 »

YOU ARE A SICK AND EVIL MAN ALLITERATION!


Na i'm just kiddin ya. I'd probably do the same thing.
Digital Dragon

Bending Unit
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« Reply #25 on: 04-13-2004 19:18 »

I'd turn all the cryogenic tubes upsidedown.
NoAPOlogies

Bending Unit
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« Reply #26 on: 04-14-2004 00:53 »

10 minutes before they are to be defrosted, turn the knob up to 1000 years again. Or just turn the cryogenic chamber around so it faces the wall and let them figure it out.
Spineless

Delivery Boy
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« Reply #27 on: 04-14-2004 01:03 »

Two words:

Curly Shuffle.

But seriously, I'd probably just welcome them by telling them that they owed me a pizza or two for helping them out of the tube safely.  Or else, I'd get some weird animal to trample them.
KAH

Bending Unit
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« Reply #28 on: 04-14-2004 01:46 »

There's a Life in Hell cartoon where a guy get unfrozen and the attendant says, "Welcome to the Future, X-3957. You owe us $3 Billion in storage fees." very similar to what evan said.
Sheerin

Crustacean
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« Reply #29 on: 04-14-2004 14:30 »

"Welcome to the world of tomorrow!!!!!  And sorry, we had a couple power failures so several of your internal organs have died, as have your reproductive organs.  You now have 5 minutes to live, err 4 minutes 55 seconds."

SwanMan3000

Starship Captain
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« Reply #30 on: 04-14-2004 14:53 »
« Last Edit on: 04-14-2004 14:53 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Teral:
Give the defrostee a tired look and ask him with my most annoyed voice: "What the hell do you want?"

How can you say "what the hell do you want?" any other way but annoyed?

I would stand up right close to them naked smiling with their door locked then id let them out and show them some frozen naked pictures id taken of them.

Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
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« Reply #31 on: 04-14-2004 15:00 »

You could be angry, or crazy. Annoyed just means: "you disturbed me in something very important, and I'm going to bitch about every 10th second, but in the end I'll do my job and help you along", whereas angry means "get the hell out of my office and never return".
El Scorcho

Bending Unit
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« Reply #32 on: 04-14-2004 15:18 »

"the Bathroom is that way", Then I would point in the wrong direction

Let's build quiet armies friends, let's march on their glass towers, let's build fallen cathedrals, and make impractical plans
SamuelXDiamond

Rectum Favourist
Urban Legend
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« Reply #33 on: 04-14-2004 20:06 »
« Last Edit on: 04-14-2004 20:06 »

"Oh, while you were asleep I broke your bed."

By the way, El Scorcho, the line is "If I met you in a scissor fight, i'd cut off both your wings on principle alone.". Just a friendly pointer  smile
PCC Fred

Space Pope
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« Reply #34 on: 04-14-2004 20:08 »

I'd point all the males in the direction of a bathroom at the other end of NYC, and tell all the females that I was the last man left on Earth.
Nasty Pasty

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #35 on: 04-14-2004 22:33 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by PCC Fred:
 and tell all the females that I was the last man left on Earth.

That has to be the best idea i'd ever heard.


Ever.


Period.

Morbo_01

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #36 on: 04-15-2004 02:45 »

I'd dress up as a mad scientist, cut their arms and legs off, watch them slowly bleed to death then start laughing and fix them with one of those crazy lazer things Zoidberg has. Either that or the last man on earth thing.

"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!"
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