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Author Topic: Esso-teric: soylentOrange's Fanfic Thread  (Read 47775 times)
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soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #120 on: 06-19-2008 19:23 »

@km73: thanks, glad you liked it.  :)  Unfortunately, I didn't know about the rule that says no audio from the series can be used, so I've probably been automatically disqualified.  Oh well.  You win some, you lose some.
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #121 on: 06-20-2008 00:24 »

Oh, bummer. Well, it was an enjoyable little piece of randomness. Reminded me of some old MST3K movie or something, what with the requisite cheesy sound effects and all.   :D
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #122 on: 07-06-2008 20:29 »

part 4
chapter 2
_____________________________ ___________________

“Ungh, my head.” Fry moaned and sat up.  “Where am I?”  His whole head was throbbing, and for some reason, the whole left side of his face was sore.  Without thinking, he reached up and touched his cheek, and was rewarded with a jolt of pain.

Fry forced himself to stand.  In front of him was a shimmering, yellow force field, humming like a fluorescent light.  Beyond that was a dimly lit, seemingly unoccupied compartment about ten meters square.  A half dozen small handheld weapons were mounted on a rack on the far wall, a couple meters from the only doorway.  The ex-delivery boy scratched his head.  How had he ended up here?  He couldn’t quite remember.  Something about sneaking into Momcorp?  God my head hurts.  He turned around and began to pace, but froze after only a single step.  There, at the other end of the room, were Leela, Bender, and Amy, all dressed in grey uniforms.

When Fry recognized Leela, he took an immediate step backward and instinctively raised his arms protectively across his chest.  “What- what are you doing here?” He managed.  His eyes were fixed on the PE Captain, waiting for her to make the slightest move against him.

Nothing happened.  Leela didn’t respond. Actually, Fry realized, she seemed to just be staring off into space, like she didn’t even know he was there.

When a few seconds had passed and Leela still made no move to attack him, Fry took a couple of steps forward.  “Uhh, Leela?” He tried again.  Still no answer.  Fry’s fear was replaced by a combination of confusion and worry.

 “Amy?  Bender?  Can you guys hear me?” The robot and the intern just continued to stare blindly at the wall beyond the force field.  Fry crouched in front of Leela and waved his hand in front of her face, but she made no sign.

“They won’t answer you.” Someone declared.  Fry just about jumped out of his skin before turning to find Walt standing in front of the force field, his hands clasped behind his back. 

 “Who are you?!” Fry demanded, balling his fists.  “What did you do to them?!”

Walt laughed at the fury in Fry’s voice.  “What, don’t you remember me?” He asked, feigning hurt feelings.  “I helped you and that idiot nephew of yours save the world from an army of rebelling robots, remember?”

Fry had to think about that for a minute.  He seemed to remember something about robots taking over the world.  Oh, that’s right.  “You mean in that Arnold Schwarzenegger movie?  Because I don’t remember being in that...”

“What? No!  Last Valentine’s Day, when Mother- Oh, forget it.”  Walt made an irritated noise and shook his head.  “My name is Walt.  As for your friends, I’ve just ensured that they’ll stick around long enough to pay off the debt they owe me.”

Fry took a look over his shoulder at his old coworkers.  None of them had moved even an inch.  Debt? He wondered.   “Why can’t they hear me?” Fry asked.

“Oh, they can hear you.” Walt assured.  “They just can’t answer.  That’s the trouble with mind control; You can still see, hear, and feel everything around you.  You know exactly what it is that you’re doing.  You just can’t do anything about it.”  Walt met Leela’s blank gaze.  He sneered at her.

 Fry tried to imagine what that would be like.  Leela’s gonna be pissed.  “But why?” He demanded.

“Because they ruined everything!” Walt snapped.  “Mother put me in charge of the Cardenian Moss operation, and if she discovers that the whole crop has been destroyed, she’ll probably kill me.  The only way to make sure that she never finds out is to hide all the evidence, and that includes them.” Walt gestured at the PE Crew.  “Until this whole thing blows over, they’ll work for me.  I put Ms. Wong and that bending robot to work on the spaceship assembly line, and Captain Leela makes an excellent security system- as you discovered earlier.” He chuckled.  “I still haven’t decided where I’m going to place you.”

“Wait, me?” Fry’s face went pale.  “You’re going to brain-control me too?!”

Walt frowned.  “You haven’t left me much choice.” He retorted.  “You snuck into Momcorp Headquarters looking for the Planet Express Crew, and I can’t let you go now that you’ve found them.”  Without waiting for a response, Walt turned and walked to the weapon rack that was mounted on the far wall.  He picked up one of the weapons and returned to the force field.  He twisted a knob on the weapon and pointed it at Fry’s chest.

“Now, it takes a few minutes for the neural suggester to interface with the brain and start transmitting delta brain waves, and I can’t have you ripping the device out before it takes over your motor functions, so I’m afraid I’m going to have to stun you.” 

Walt reached for the force field’s control panel, and the field vanished.  Fry put his hands up and began backing slowly away.  “Now hold on just a second-” he pleaded.  “Why don’t we just stop and talk about this for a bit like two grown up-” Walt shot him squarely in the stomach, and Fry was out cold yet again.
_____________________________ _____________________________ ______________

Fry awoke with a start to find himself sprawled facedown on the floor of the cell.  His head still hurt from the blow dealt it by Leela’s rifle, and his neck itched a little, but otherwise he seemed unharmed.  But am I a zombie? Fry wondered.  He didn’t feel like he was under the influence of mind control.  There was a puddle of slobber on the floor, though.  But come to think of it, he did that pretty often anyway.  But then again, he wasn’t sure exactly what being zombified was supposed to feel like.  Well, only one way to find out.  He tried to sit up. 

His body did what he told it to.  Ok, that was easy.  He thought.  What about…  He told his right hand to move, and had no trouble putting it up in front of his face.  His fingers obeyed the little random orders he gave them, and even succeeded in poking him in the eye.

What’s going on?  I thought my brain was supposed to be under Walt’s control!  The itch at his neck began to bother him, and he scratched it absently.  His finger found something on his skin that hadn’t been there before.  At first he thought it was a mole, but it felt solid, as though it were made of metal. 

There wasn’t a mirror in the cell, but Fry could see a little of his reflection in the force field if he got close enough.  When he squinted at the image of the thing on his neck he could make out what looked like circuitry etched into a metal disc.  Hair-thin wires snaked out of the sides of the disc and disappeared into his skin.  The sight of those wires penetrating into his body made Fry panic.  By the time he’d thought about what the consequences might be, he’d already ripped the device off of the surface of his skin and thrown it to the floor. 

Fry stood over the little disc, breathing heavily.  For a minute he watched it, as if he expected it to get up and roll away under its own volition.  It didn’t work.  Fry realised at last.  The mind control didn’t work on me.  Why not?  Obviously it had worked on the PE Crew.  They were still sitting in the same positions they had been in when Fry’d woken up in the cell the first time.  And, now that he knew to look, he could see little metal discs on Amy and Leela’s necks and on the side of Bender’s head.  Fry walked over to Amy and knelt down beside her.  He began to reach for her disc, but Amy jerked away at the last moment.

 The intern’s sudden movement startled Fry, and he withdrew his hand.  “Amy?” He asked uncertainly.  “Did you do that?”

When Amy didn’t respond, Fry reached for the disc again, only to have her jerk away again.  The mind control thing must be making her do that.  Fry guessed after a third attempt.  He waited for a few seconds and then grabbed at the disc with an abruptness and speed that didn’t give Amy a chance to react.  The ex-delivery boy’s fingertips grabbed ahold of the device attached to Amy’s neck.  He just barely managed to duck out of the way of the intern’s fist as it sailed by his head, and then yanked on the disc.  It came away from her skin with a sound that was reminiscent of Velcro.  Amy gasped and crumpled to the floor.
_____________________________ _____________________________ ______________
“Amy, are you ok?”  Fry was getting worried; the intern had been out cold for ten minutes now.  Ripping a device that was hardwired into her brain out of her neck didn’t seem as good an idea as it had earlier.  He shook her again, his panic starting to mount.  To his immense relief, she began to stir.

The intern blinked a couple of times, and groaned.  Then she froze.  “Wait a second.  Did I just do that?” She asked aloud.  When she heard the sound of her own voice in her ears she let out a cry of joy and leapt to her feet, the nausea of being disconnected from the neural suggester completely forgotten.  Tears began to fill the corners of her eyes as she danced about the small compartment.

Fry was horrified; Amy was making enough noise to attract any guards within a ten-mile radius.  “Amy wait!” He pleaded, grabbing her wrist as she practically bounced past.  “They’ll hear you!”

Amy sobered up instantly when the meaning of Fry’s words sank in.  She stopped in her tracks, and the two of them waited nervously for someone to appear at the force field.  No one did.

  Both Fry and Amy let out a sigh of relief.  Fry let himself lean against one of the cell walls.  When he looked at Amy again she was scratching the side of her nose.  “You have no idea how long I’ve needed to do that.” She explained when she caught him looking at her. 

“You okay?” Fry asked, still worried that destroying the brain control device might have been unwise.  “You know.  Does everything work the way it should?”

“I think so.” Amy replied.  “My neck’s just a little sore.”  She put a hand to her neck and, feeling something strange, she pinched it between her thumb and index finger and pulled.  Whatever it was, it was loose, so she kept pulling.  A few seconds later, three feet of gossamer wire lay spooled in her right hand.  Fry thought he was going to be sick.

“Should we try and free Leela and Bender?” Amy asked eventually. 

That was the question, all right.  He’d pulled the mind control thing off of Amy first for a reason- he wasn’t sure he wanted to have to face either Leela or Bender.  On the other hand, he’d risked his life to get this far, and it wasn’t like he and Amy were going to escape by themselves.

“Yeah, I guess we ought to.” He said reluctantly.  The trouble was that Amy had tried to hit him when he’d attempted to remove the disc attached to her neck.  That meant the mind control gizmos were trying to protect themselves.  Amy wasn’t a good enough fighter to be much of a threat, but Bender would be able to crush Fry or Amy’s spines if he got in a lucky punch, and Leela… Fry gulped at the thought of what she would probably do to them.

Amy seemed to be following the same line of thought, because she hesitated for a moment and then said.  “Uh… Why don’t we try Bender?”
 
Fry agreed, and the two of them walked over to the bending robot, who was still staring off into space.  If he hadn’t known better, Fry would have said Bender wasn’t on line at all.  Amy bent down to get a closer look at the metal disc that was seemingly welded to the side of Bender’s head.  There weren’t any of the little white wires that connected the discs to their human hosts.

“How’re we going to get that off him?”  Fry asked.  “It looks stuck on there pretty good.”

Amy stood, and grabbing Bender’s right arm in her hands said cheerfully “Like this.”  She yanked at the robot’s appendage and it easily came away from his frame.  When Bender didn’t react, Amy raised the metal limb over her head and, uttering something in Chinese, brought the makeshift club down hard against the neural suggester.  The force of the blow caused Bender to slump over on his side.  His head toppled off his shoulders and rolled away across the floor.

“Hey, Amy!  You mind?” Bender’s head asked with characteristic sarcasm from the far corner of the cell.  “Getting dings out of the side of my head isn’t easy, you know!”

Fry couldn’t help but grin at the sound of his old roommate’s voice, and his reservations vanished- at least for the moment.  “Sorry, Bender.” He said, retrieving the robot’s head. 

“Yeah, well… Don’t let it happen again.”  Bender’s headless body got to its feet and snatched its missing arm from Amy’s grasp.  As Fry screwed the robot’s head back into place, Bender’s body reattached the arm.

“Everything hooked up alright?” Fry asked when Bender had seemingly finished putting himself back together.

“Yeah, I think so.” The robot replied.  “Nothing a spot welder and some ass varnish won’t fix.” 

“Good!” Fry replied enthusiastically.  “Because we need your help.”  He nodded in the direction of Leela
_____________________________ _____________________________ __________

Fry nodded at Amy, and the intern positioned herself to Leela’s left, right at the edge of the cyclops’s field of view.  Fry then moved to Leela’s right and, with another nod, the two humans knelt down.  That was the signal for Bender to approach, which the bending robot reluctantly did.  Once Bender was ready, Fry and Amy took hold of the PE Captain’s arms and hauled downward, forcing Leela into a crouch.  Simultaneously, Bender extended his arms and gripped Leela’s neural suggester with two of his metal fingers.  The idea was to pin Leela to the ground so that she had no time to react when Bender pried the disc off of her.  It had seemed like a great plan when they’d been whispering it to each other on the far side of the room. 

Leela easily broke free of Amy’s grasp and, after karate-chopping Fry in the face and ducking away from Bender’s extended arm, rolled forward and leapt to her feet.  She whirled and went into a defensive position.

Fry’s head swam from the blow, but he was able to stand.  Holding his arms out, palms up, he took a few steps in Leela’s direction.  “Leela, it’s me, Fry.” He said with a reassuring voice.  “I’m not going to hurt you.  I just want to help.”

“Uh, Fry.  I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Fry took another step.  “Come on, Leela.  Fight it.” He pleaded.  Another step put him within arm’s reach of the PE Captain.  He held out a hand to her.  “Please, just let me-”

Leela grabbed his arm and, twisting it, spun him around and pinned it behind his back.  Fry winced.  “Okay, so that didn’t work quite like I’d hoped.”

*   *   *   *   *   *   *

It was time.  This was her one and only chance.  Leela mustered every little bit of strength that she’d been saving and, steeling herself, focused all of that energy on one simple command.  The parts of her mind still under her control flooded her neural pathways with the order.  The neural suggester, distracted with the external threat, momentarily felt its control slipping away.  The order got through.

Don’t screw this up, Fry.  She hoped, against her better judgement.

*   *   *   *   *   *   *

The grip on Fry’s arm loosened.  For once in his life, he actually reacted fast enough.  Without turning around, he reached up and felt his fingers close around the disc on Leela’s neck.  He pulled.

Leela’s body collapsed into a heap.  Alarmed, Fry rushed to her side and kneeling, put a hand on her shoulder.   He shook her gently.  “Leela?” He asked, more than a little worried.  For a few moments there was no response beyond the rhythmic rise and fall of the cyclops’ chest as she breathed.  Fry was just about to shake her again when her eye fluttered open.  When their eyes met he felt a wave of relief wash over him. 
_____________________________ _____________________________ ______________

“…And that’s how I ended up here.”  Fry concluded.  Silence descended between the four of them as his words sank in. He’d told them the whole story, starting from the morning that he’d defrosted Chelsea and concluding with his surprise and joy upon finding Leela walking through Momcorp headquarters.  Now he waited nervously for their response.  The last time he’d seen Leela, they’d been at each other’s throats.  Could she still be angry with him?  And who knew what Bender had come to think of him, disappearing without saying goodbye as he’d done?  For the first time it occurred to him that maybe his former friends hadn’t wanted the help that he’d tried to give them.

He found himself watching Leela, waiting for her to make some sign.  She had her arms crossed, and she was standing so that most of her weight was on her left foot.  She was staring at the floor.  Finally, Fry could take it no longer.

“Leela, are you alri-”

“I’m sorry.” Leela said.

The rest of Fry’s sentence died off in his throat.  “W- what?”

Leela lifted her head to look right at him.  Her face was somehow tight, as if she was firmly clamping down on something that was trying to escape from within her.  “I’m sorry.” She repeated stiffly.  “For kicking your ass.”  Abruptly she crossed her arms and turned away from him, leaving Fry to stare dumbfounded at the back of her head.

Fry turned to Amy for help.  Their eyes met, and a silent communication passed between them.  The intern shrugged apologetically.  Fry understood the message.  Leela was still angry at him for the argument that they had had in his apartment so long ago.  She hadn’t beaten him up yet though- well, at least, not on purpose.  And she was talking to him.  Those were both good signs.  Maybe she’d forgive him eventually.  Maybe.

 “Yo, organ piles, can we cut this emotion crap and start worrying about some more important issues?  Like the fact that we’re still stuck in this prison cell?”  That was Bender, of course.  Not for the first time, Fry was silently thankful for Bender’s impatience with human emotional drama.  It had often proved an excellent means of interrupting and dispelling an awkward situation.

“Bender’s right.” Fry said.  “That Walt guy might be back at any moment to stick those disc dealies in our heads, and he probably won’t let me pull them off you guys again.”  He paused for a moment, aware that his next words had to be chosen carefully.  This had been his rescue mission up until the point that he’d pulled the disc off of Leela’s neck, but he knew- as did everyone present- that it would be foolish for anyone other than Leela to be in charge now that she was free.  But he couldn’t look like he was just dumping all the responsibility on her either.  Normally she wouldn’t mind, but she was already mad at him; no need to make it worse.  “We need to get out of here.  You guys have been stuck here for, like, weeks, right?  Leela, did, you know, have time to think of some way to escape?”  I so hope that was the right thing to say.

Leela still had her back turned to Fry, so the only reaction the redhead could detect was a slight slump of the shoulders and what might have been a sigh.  A second or two passed, and then Leela turned back to face the group.  “Alright.” She said, her voice ringing with that distinct, confident tone of command that she had.  “Let’s do this.”  For a split second she looked in Fry’s direction, and a corner of her mouth turned up in the barest hint of a smile.  Fry shot her a lopsided grin.
_____________________________ ________________________

“It’s no use.” Leela said, relaxing her grip on the pair of pliers that she gripped in her right hand.   After two hours of poking and prying at the metal panels that lined the cell with a screwdriver that had been stashed in Bender’s chest cabinet, Leela had finally managed to gain access to an interior section of wall.  She and Amy had surveyed the nest of multicolored wires that had been exposed, looking for a circuit that might control the forcefield that kept them trapped.  They’d narrowed their choice to three candidates, a red, a yellow, and a white wire, but cutting them had seemingly done nothing.  They had then decided to try and reach the computer chip that controlled the forcefield.  Unfortunately, when they’d finally located it, they’d discovered that it was protected by a cage of unbendium.  Even Bender wasn’t strong enough to bend bars like those, and anything they stuck through the bars- including the pair of pliers that Leela had found lying atop the screwdriver- wasn’t long enough to reach the chip.

“It’s okay, Leela.” Amy assured her.  “Your hands are just too big and masculine to fit through the bars.”  Leela narrowed her eye at her, but the smile that Amy gave her was completely innocent.

”This bends.” Bender said decisively.  “Why don’t we just wait until that weaselly-looking human shows up again and rush him?  We can use Fry to shield us from the gunfire!”

Fry pretended he hadn’t heard that last remark.  “Uhh Leela? Amy?  Do you guys have any other ideas?”

Amy shrugged and shook her head, but Leela looked thoughtful.  “Hmm.  Actually, Bender might be right.”  Fry’s eyes went wide, but Leela wasn’t finished.  “Right about waiting for Walt, I mean.” Fry breathed a sigh of relief.  “If we put those mind control things back on our necks we can make it look like we’re still zombies.  Then, when Walt shows up to let us out, we’ll beat the tar out of him.”

Fry and Bender looked at each other uneasily.  Amy understood what they were thinking.  “Don’t worry, you guys.” She assured them.  “The mind control things are dead.  I checked.”  Kneeling down, she picked up one of the discs and placed it against her neck.  She waited a few moments and took her hand away.  The disc immediately fell to the ground.

“Hmm.” Leela said.  “It looks like we’ll need some way to keep them stuck in place.  Bender, do you have any glue in that cabinet of yours?”

“Whoa, hey wait a second.” Fry protested.  “You want me to glue something to my body?  How come all the other times I wanted to do that you were against it?”

“Because gluing your cellphone to your hand so you would always have it with you is stupid.” Leela retorted.  “Well, Bender?  Do you have any?”

Bender rolled his eyes, but he stuck his hand into his compartment.  “What do I look like, a toolbot?  Why do you bloodbags always assume I carry everything around with me?  This is a small storage space, and I have lots of loot to haul around with me- oh wait a minute, here it is.”  With a mechanical whir he pulled out a white tube.  On it was marked the words ‘crazy glue: made from and used by crazy people.’

Leela took the glue and examined it.  “It says it can be removed ‘almost painlessly' if applied to the skin.  Hmm, I wonder why almost is written in quotes?”  There was a beat.  “Oh well, it’ll have to do.  Everyone find a neural suggester and put a drop of glue on it.  Try to stick it exactly where it was originally.”

“What then?” Fry asked.

“We wait.” she said.
_____________________________ _________________

okay, so this update took way too long to write.  No matter what I did, I just couldn't get it to turn out the way I wanted.  Luckily, when I finally just gave up and sent it to justNibblin' for beta-ing, he had reservations about it as well, because he convinced me to redo it one last time.  What I finally ended up with was much nicer.

Oh, and Archonix, I think I might have stolen that unbendium joke from you, but I can't remember anymore.  Sorry if that's the case  :)
Archonix

Space Pope
****
« Reply #123 on: 07-06-2008 20:51 »

I don't remember making an unbendium joke. The wife doesn't recall me making one either, so it must be someone else... doesn't matter, I'm sure they won't mind it being used in something like this.  :D

Which is well written, by the way. Sometimes things turn out the way they want to be.
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #124 on: 07-07-2008 17:31 »

I don't remember reading an unbendium joke anywhere, either, so maybe you didn't actually steal borrow it.

..This is sooo many levels of fantastic. I cannot state enough how much I enjoy this story. I can just see the crew's vacuous stares as Fry tries to get their attention. You have a real flair for character - if Leela isn't being condescending towards Fry, she's beating him up; you personify Bender flawlessly (love "this bends", haa); and you restore Fry to his genial likeability after the damage the movies do.
(In my opinion).

Also spiffy: "I wonder why almost is written in quotes".
  :laff:
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #125 on: 07-07-2008 19:18 »

Ah, just what this tired old man needed - two of his favorite stories updated.

Of course Leela couldn't bring herself to even say "Thanks" for releasing her from months of forced servitude. 
THM

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #126 on: 07-07-2008 19:58 »

I'm impressed; a kick-ass new section to a great story, and I wasn't involved in prereading? What's the world coming to?  ;)

Seriously though, this is good stuff, and I'm glad to see more arrive. Roll on the next section!
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #127 on: 07-07-2008 20:45 »
« Last Edit on: 07-07-2008 20:45 »

@Archonix: Hmm...  Mayhe I stole it from JBERGES then?  I mean, the only other option is that I was being original.  *laughs*

@@km73: aww. shucks.    :)  Seriously though, I'm glad you're getting so much enjoyment out of it.  I've been on the verge of quitting writing a couple of times, but the kind comments that you guys give me always persuade me to give it another shot. 

@Ralph: Heh, funny you should mention Leela's reaction.  Originally she got really emotional.  She cried and told Fry how glad she was that he'd come.  It stank.  Luckily JustNibblin' didn't think it was up to par either, because I'm finally happy with it now.

@THM: whoops!  I thought I sent this update to you!  I'm sorry about that; no wonder I didn't hear anything back... 
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #128 on: 07-08-2008 01:40 »

I just read this whole thing in one go. Awesome.
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #129 on: 07-08-2008 02:45 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Venus:

I just read this whole thing in one go. Awesome.

Takethat as a great compliment.  Venus rarely posts and even more rarely gives a "Toes Up" salute.

I hope Animaniacs fans will get that reference.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #130 on: 07-08-2008 08:38 »

@Venus: you read all 70 pages of it in one go?  Wow.  It's great that you like it, what with you being shippiness incarnate and all.  I wasn't sure if the emotional stuff feel right.  I decided half way through the story (when my disgust with the Leela-Lars relationship finally wore off) to go from anti-shipiness back to shipiness, where I belong.

@Ralph: yeah, alot of the writers that have been around forever don't seem to be posting much anymore.  I was kinda hoping that the release of the movies would pique their interest in the board and in writing, but it doesnt seem to have happened.
Corvus

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #131 on: 07-08-2008 11:01 »
« Last Edit on: 07-08-2008 11:01 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Venus:
I just read this whole thing in one go. Awesome.

What she said... awesome.

*cough* some of us ARE writing.. just not here.

But here and yes... I AM a hypocrite
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #132 on: 07-08-2008 11:52 »

what's this, Venus and Corvus both coming out from under their rocks within 24 hours of each other?  Gods no!  It must be the PEELocalypse... again...  I kid, I kid.

Oh, and Corvus, you should have an email from me today.  IF you don't, then I forgot, so feel free to pester me about it.   :)
JBERGES

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #133 on: 07-08-2008 12:12 »
« Last Edit on: 07-08-2008 12:12 »

SO:  Nope, definitely not my joke.  I've just re-read all my stuff whilst doing the rewrites, so I can be sure.

   
Quote
@Ralph: yeah, a lot of the writers that have been around forever don't seem to be posting much anymore.
I'd extend that to 'all PEEL members' in general; clearly the writers are just the most memorable   :p

That said, take solace in the fact you're drawing some of the old guard out of hiding.  I can see you struggled a bit with this part, but you persevered, and you're undoubtedly too hard on yourself when reading it yoursel.  Still very interested with the plot, and I greatly enjoyed Amy's solution to the Bender problem.
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #134 on: 07-08-2008 15:57 »

Mm, I also enjoyed the description of Leela trying to fight the mind control, too.

Corvus, you posted again! I read your Chrome Sky story a couple of weeks ago, it was very nice. I don't know why you don't post it here.

 
Quote
Originally posted by soylentOrange:
 I've been on the verge of quitting writing a couple of times, but the kind comments that you guys give me always persuade me to give it another shot.
 

awww warm & fuzzy

 
Quote
Heh, funny you should mention Leela's reaction.  Originally she got really emotional.  She cried and told Fry how glad she was that he'd come.

  :laff:
Seriously?
I find that very amusing; for..reasons.

(Don't mind me).
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #135 on: 07-08-2008 16:13 »

 
Quote
Seriously?
I find that very amusing; for..reasons.

*sigh*    :nono:
Archonix

Space Pope
****
« Reply #136 on: 07-08-2008 16:40 »

Welcome to the gutter.  ;)

 
Quote
and you're undoubtedly too hard on yourself when reading it yoursel.

SECOND! A lot of the good writers I know have this odd attitude of not being able to appreciate their own best work. Seems the closer to perfection people become, the more dissatisfied they are with it.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #137 on: 07-08-2008 16:47 »

I think that's kinda true with everything.  Musicians, writers, artists- they all think they're 100 times worse than they really are.
Corvus

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #138 on: 07-09-2008 04:19 »
« Last Edit on: 07-09-2008 04:19 »


Edit: Ignore this post.
------------------
"Finding your true love is like winning the lottery,
it always happens to someone else."
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #139 on: 07-09-2008 04:55 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Corvus:
 
Quote
Originally posted by km73:
Corvus, you posted again! I read your Chrome Sky story a couple of weeks ago, it was very nice. I don't know why you don't post it here.
No offence but I fail to see the point posting it here.

Dude, I know you feel slighted and have been upset about some things, but Kim just passed you a compliment.

You should be a little more aprreciative.

Corvus

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #140 on: 07-09-2008 05:19 »
« Last Edit on: 07-09-2008 05:19 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ralph Snart:
 Dude, I know you feel slighted and have been upset about some things, but Kim just passed you a compliment.

You should be a little more aprreciative.


You're right, that was not a good reply, sorry.

@Km73: Let me rephrase that reply;
I'm glad that you liked Beneath A Chrome Sky. For that I thank you.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #141 on: 07-09-2008 21:05 »

so I was at work today converting the "you're not paid to think" Futurama poster into wallpaper for the company computer when a customer came up to me and asked "Do you sell dolomite?"  Seriously.  What she actually wanted was diatomite, which is a white powder that you put into a swimming pool filter, I was like "umm, what?"
aknightofni

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #142 on: 07-09-2008 23:29 »

They wont ship the "your not paid to think" poster to Canada, bastards.
Archonix

Space Pope
****
« Reply #143 on: 07-10-2008 04:57 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by soylentOrange:
so I was at work today converting the "you're not paid to think" Futurama poster into wallpaper for the company computer when a customer came up to me and asked "Do you sell dolomite?"  Seriously.  What she actually wanted was diatomite, which is a white powder that you put into a swimming pool filter, I was like "umm, what?"

Y'all should have asked if they were planning to go for a swim in boiling hot lava.
JBERGES

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #144 on: 07-10-2008 11:30 »

Or punched yourself in the stomach and insisted you were some percentage of said dolomite.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #145 on: 07-14-2008 18:56 »
« Last Edit on: 07-14-2008 18:56 »



Thanks Archonix!
El-Man

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #146 on: 07-14-2008 21:34 »

"You will be like, gluh, assimilated!" ?  :)
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #147 on: 07-14-2008 23:03 »

lo'cute'us of Borg says resistance is totally futile.
aknightofni

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #148 on: 07-14-2008 23:23 »

V/I = Futile.

Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #149 on: 07-19-2008 14:30 »

Man, it has taken me way too long to get around to commenting on the latest part of the fic. Stellar as always, and the reworking definitely seems to have paid off (I can't think of anyway to improve it, at least). Not much to say that hasn't been said already as there's been a bazillion comments, so I'll leave it with a simple excellent work as always.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #150 on: 08-09-2008 22:33 »

oh hey, thanks for the comment SW.  I hadn't realised you'd posted anything.

Sorry for the long delay again.  I've been far away from internet access (and computers) for the last couple of weeks.  Here is the next part of Disillusionment:
_____________________________ ____________________

part: 4
chapter: 3

  *   *   *   *   *   *   *
Leela felt her stomach grumble again.  It had been complaining to her for two hours now; the guard that usually came by with their dinner had never appeared.  She and Amy hadn’t eaten for almost twelve hours now, and her seemingly supercharged alien metabolism was demanding to be fed.

Even worse, there were other, more private bodily functions that she’d really rather not show in front of Bender.  Where is that damned guard?  She wondered.  Usually someone would come by periodically and let them out one at a time to use the restroom or take a shower, but not a single person had entered the cell block since Walt had appeared to implant a neural suggester on Fry’s neck.  That had been almost eight hours ago.
 
“Leela, how much longer is this gonna take?” Fry whined.  Leela chose to ignore him; he knew full well that she had no way to know when they’d get a chance to make their move.  Complaining was just his way of dealing with the boredom and stress, and replying with a sarcastic comment would just end up with her angry and him sulking.  She didn’t really feel the desire to deal with either at the moment. 

Amy, however, decided to take the opportunity to voice her own concerns when her Captain remained silent.  “He has a point, Leela.  We haven’t seen anybody for hours.  If somebody doesn’t show up soon with some moisturizing cream, I might not make it through the night.”

“Yeah,” Bender agreed, “and hairball over there looks like his coolant tank is about to rupture.”  The robot gestured at Fry, who was sitting on the floor with his legs tightly crossed, a pained expression on his face.

“I’m… fine.” Fry said in a voice that clearly belied how much he was suffering.  Leela couldn’t help but feel a little guilty when he looked up at her and risked a smile.  She had assumed that he had just been complaining because he was bored, but he wasn’t bored, he was miserable.  Unfortunately, there wasn’t a thing that could be done about it, trapped as they were behind the shimmering yellow forcefield.

“Sorry, Fry.”  Leela offered gently,  “but there’s no way to know when we’ll get a chance to escape.  Actually, we should all probably try and get some sleep.  We need to keep our energies up, since it looks like we’re not getting anything to eat tonight.  Just make sure to lie on your backs.  That’s the way the neural suggesters always made us sleep, after they picked a random place for us to lie down.”

There was a bit of grumbling from her crew at the mention of food, but they all eventually lay down to try and follow her advice.  Leela couldn’t help noticing Bender putting on a big show of ‘just happening’ to end up lying next to his old roommate.  It was adorable actually, in a pathetic sort of way.
_____________________________ _____________________________ _____________

“Psst.  Leela, wake up!”  It was Amy’s voice, and it sounded urgent.  One of the guards must have finally shown up, then.  “Shh!” She whispered back as she slowly opened her eye.  “We’re not supposed to be able to talk, rememb-”  Leela cut herself off.  She couldn’t see any guards, or anything else.  Someone had turned off the lights.  No, not just the lights.  She realized with a start.  The forcefield was gone as well.   Through some miraculous stroke of luck they were suddenly free.  Unfortunately, in her experience, miracles always came with a catch.

“I have a really bad feeling about this.” Fry whispered, and Leela silently agreed.
_____________________________ _____________________________ __________

“Okay, here’s the plan.”  Fry, Bender, and Amy stood together by the entrance to their cell, all of them facing the door to the facility beyond, while Leela paced back and forth in front of them.  A pool of yellow-white light followed her across the room as Bender’s eyes, which apparently also served as flashlights, tracked her movements.  She held two stunners in her hands, and as she strode past Amy she thrust one of them into the intern’s grasp.  “Amy and I will each take a stunner.”  There had been five weapons in the locker, but she wasn’t about to trust Fry or Bender with one. 

“Bender,” she continued, blinking in annoyance when she accidentally looked directly into the robot’s illuminated eyes, “you’ll be responsible for bending open any locked doors that get in the way.”  Bender, for once, did not complain.  Any plan that involved bending was a good one, at least by his standards.

“What about me?” Fry asked eagerly, legs now uncrossed.  “What’s my job gonna be?”

Leela hesitated for a moment.  “Uhh, well Fry, you’ll-  Umm…”  Her mind raced as she tried to come up with something.  What can I give him that will keep him out of the way, but won’t hurt his feelings? She thought instinctively, momentarily forgetting that she was supposed to be angry at him.  Her eye settled on a small medical kit that was stashed in the same place as the stunners.  Aha!  “I’ll tell you what Fry, why don’t you be in charge of keeping this safe?”  She gently handed him the kit, as if it were extremely delicate.  That should make him feel useful. She thought.  And it can’t hurt to have a medkit around, anyway.

 Fry took the kit and clutched it protectively to his chest, his face hardening into a grim determination to let nothing, absolutely nothing, take the medkit from him

“Alright then, everybody ready?”  Leela looked from one face to another.  She could barely make out their faces in the shadows beyond the pool of light cast by Bender’s eyes, but she heard no sounds of dissent.   Turning, she walked to the door that led to the interior of the Momcorp building.  She’d walked around the building countless times as a zombie; she knew the layout by heart.  Why, then, did the idea of opening the door give her such a feeling of plunging into the unknown?  Maybe I’ve been locked up for so long, I’ve grown used to it? She wondered.  But that didn’t make sense.  No, something about this while situation didn’t seem right.  The loss of power, the fact that there was no sign of the guards, the eerie silence of the building…  Something was seriously not right, and a cold shiver ran down her spine as she reached for the keypad that would open the door.  She knew with a sudden certainty that there was something on the other side of that door.  Something bad.  Leela started to pull her hand back before catching herself.  What the hell am I doing? she wondered, furious with herself for her weakness.  It’s just a stupid door.  Get ahold of yourself, Turanga.  She pushed a button on the control panel.

The door whooshed open, and Leela saw… nothing.  The light from Bender’s eyes passed over Leela’s right shoulder, flooding the corridor beyond.  Leela motioned for Bender to look left and right down the length of the hallway, which he did.  It was seemingly empty.  If Leela hadn’t known better, she would have said that everyone had just turned the lights out and gone home for the day.  They wouldn’t have turned off the forcefields in their prison wing when they left, though.

Of course, none of that really mattered.  A get out of jail free card, regardless of how strange the circumstances in which it was presented, was still a get out of jail free card, at least, according to the popular game of Momopoly.   Wanting to waste no more time, Leela gestured for her crew to follow her down the hall in the direction that she knew was the exit.  Fry, Amy, and even Bender stayed close.  She could see it in their faces that they also felt that something was not quite right.

When they walked by one of the windows, Amy muttered- “Umm, hey guys?  Come look at this.”

Fry, Leela, and Bender stopped and walked back to stand next to the intern.  “I don’t get it.” Fry said after looking out into the blackness that was outside the window.  “I don’t see anything.”

Leela nodded, and another chill shot down her spine.  “Exactly.  It’s the middle of the night in New New York City.  Where are all the lights?” 
_____________________________ _____________________________ ____________

The city was as dark as space itself.  The PE crew met no resistance as they snuck through Momcorp headquarters.  No alarms went off, no guards tried to stop them.  They’d literally been able to walk right out of the main entrance to the building.  Now they stood uncontested on the street right outside the front door, unsure of what to make of the eerie darkness that surrounded them.  Nothing moved.  Humans, aliens, robots, even the owls were mysteriously absent from the streets.  Their were none of the omnipresent hovercars flying overhead, or even parked by the curb.

Looks like everyone left in a hurry.  Leela thought.  I wonder where they all went?

“Leela?” Fry asked in a whisper, voice shaking.  “What’s going on?” 

Yes, that’s the question alright.  “I don’t know yet, Fry.” She replied in as confident tone as she could muster, “but let’s not panic until we know more.”  She turned to the blob of darkness-within-darkness that she thought was Bender.  Not wanting to be noticed until she knew what was happening, Leela had instructed Bender to turn off his eyelights when the PE crew had come outside.  Now that she’d been in the darkness for a few minutes, her eye was beginning to adjust.  If she squinted real hard she could almost make out her friends’ faces in the dim starlight.  She’d always wondered if her larger iris gave her an advantage in night vision over humans.

“Bender,” she said, “the three of us can’t see very well in the dark, so we’re going to need you to be a lookout while we head back to Planet Express.”  That seemed the logical place to go.  It was familiar and stood the best chance of providing shelter from whatever had driven everyone away. And it would provide answers, assuming there was still anyone there.  “Everyone else, stay as close together as possible.  We can’t risk turning on a light and giving ourselves away until we know what we’re dealing with, so be quiet and don’t get separated, okay?”  Leela’s vision had improved enough by this point to see her friends nod affirmative.  “Alright.” She whispered.  “Let’s go.”
_____________________________ _____________________________ ___________
 
  “This way! Hurry!” The decaying sewer tunnel came alight with the pale green, flickering discharge from a gauss rifle.  A bolt of deadly electricity sizzled by Leela’s head and slammed into a tunnel wall, blasting chunks of centuries-old concrete into the sludgy water that ran through the pipe.  Leela rolled and turned, entered a crouch, and returned fire.  Fry, who had been a couple of steps behind, ran past, face frozen in the same fear that had filled Amy’s eyes during those last moments, just as she’d disappeared from sight.

Another  bolt of electricity came shrieking toward them.  Leela ducked out of the way just it time; it impacted the sludge not ten feet away.  Thank god whatever’s in this water doesn’t conduct electricity.  Leela thought. 

After squeezing off a couple more shots, Leela stood and ran after Fry’s receding back.  Silently she swore to herself.  Amy and Bender were gone, but she would not lose a third friend today. 
_____________________________ _____________________________ _____________

*   *   *   *   *   *   *

They’d made it maybe a quarter mile from Momcorp before Leela’s feeling that something was watching them became too strong to ignore.  There seemed to be eyes all around them; she was certain of it.  The four of them were walking in a line, with Bender up front leading the way.  She was in the back, making sure that no one got separated.  Up ahead was a large, open intersection with tall buildings overlooking it on all sides; she could just barely see it in the feeble starlight.  There was nothing obviously wrong, but as they walked toward it she felt the hairs stand up on the back of her neck.   With a few quick strides she caught up with Bender as he entered the intersection.   “Bender, wait!” She hissed as the robot stepped out into the open.  As she reached out to grab hold of what passed for his shoulder, the world exploded in light.

There was a flash like a supernova and the intersection was suddenly cast in a harsh reddish orange.  It was a flare.  Leela’s slammed her eye shut against the painful glare, and she heard Amy gasp.  She only allowed herself a moment to adjust and then forced her eye back open, just in time to dive out of the way of incoming fire.  A ball of plasma passed between her and Fry and entered the ground floor of the building that was behind them, where it buried itself into the back wall with a resounding boom.  Amy screamed, and Leela waited for the next shot to give away their attacker’s position.  Strangely, that shot didn’t come. 

A few seconds passed in silence before three figures emerged from behind a low wall that ran around a store at the far end of the intersection.  As the figures drew close she breathed a silent sigh of relief.  They were wearing DOOP uniforms. 

“Who are you?” The lead soldier- who Leela could now see was a young lieutenant- demanded, leveling his plasma weapon.  “What are you doing out here?”

Leela stepped forward, and three rifles were instantly pointed at her chest.  “My name is Turanga Leela, Captain of the Planet Express delivery ship.”  Gesturing to the others, she added “this is my crew.  We were trying to find someone who could tell us what’s going on” 

The soldiers’ eyes went wide.  “You mean you don’t know what’s happening?”  The man on the right asked incredulously.

“Damn world is coming to an end, is what.” The third soldier muttered.

“Can it, Michaels.” The lieutenant snapped.  He regarded the PE crew for a few more moments before seemingly coming to a decision.  “Well, you look like you’re clean still, anyways.”  He shook his head.  “It’s a miracle that you’ve made it in the city this long by yourselves, and general Brannigan told us that he was ‘absolutely 100% almost positive’ that all of the civilians had left the city.  I guess we’d better call HQ and see if we can arrange to have you evac’d.”

The lieutenant gestured for the four of them to follow him toward the building with the low wall.  As Michaels and the other soldier swept the surrounding area with their eyes for threats, the lieutenant guided Leela and the others into the building’s front room. Leela looked around her, curious.  They were in a jewelry store, but mixed in with the precious stones were ammo boxes and communications equipment.  A single small lantern, turned so low that it could barely be qualified as ‘on’ was the only illumination.

The lieutenant walked to the cash register, leaned his rifle against a nearby wall, and reaching into a duffel bag that lay perched up against the register, pulled out a box of cigarettes.  He offered one to Fry, Leela, and Amy, but they each declined.  Bender, of course, was much too preoccupied with eyeing the store’s merchandise to notice the offering.  The lieutenant shrugged and leaned up against a display case.  Bender eyed him carefully, obviously trying to judge whether the young soldier would intervene if some of the gemstones magically ended up in his chest cabinet.

“I’m lieutenant Rodriquez,” the lieutenant said, after lighting a cigarette and taking a long pull.  “1st company, 114th battalion.  Now tell me, what the heck were you nice people all doing out here in the middle of a war zone?”

Fry scratched his head.  “Uhh yeah, about that, what war are we talking about again?”

“You mean you really don’t know?”  Rodriguez asked.  “The city has been under attack for almost 12 hours.  How could you not know that?”

Leela spoke up before any of her friends said anything that would make their situation worse.  Mom was the richest, most powerful, and most adorable businesswoman in the world.  Claiming that they had all been locked up in some secret prison in her facility would get them laughed at.  Or shot, considering that there were members of every government and military organization on her payroll.  Who knew where Lieutenant Rodriguez’s true loyalties lay?   

“Uh, we were-”  Leela’s mind raced for a plausible excuse.  Crap!  Where could we have been that would be cut off from everyone in the city for hours at a time?  This is the 31st century; we’ve always got access to information!  The only thing she could think of was prison, and she wasn’t about to say that.

“An elevator.” Fry interjected.  “We were stuck in an elevator when the power went out.  We heard sirens and stuff, but, when we finally got the doors open, everybody was gone.”

Leela couldn’t help but be impressed.  It was an entirely plausible scenario.  She watched Rodriquez carefully to see whether or not he would buy it.  He seemed to accept the explanation.

“Huh.  Well, in that case, you probably should have stayed in the elevator.”  He exhaled a plume of acrid smoke.

“Why, what is going on here?” Leela asked, becoming a little annoyed at how long it was taking to get an explanation.

“Well, if you guys got stuck in an elevator when the city’s lights went out, then I guess you already know that people all over the city were disappearing.” 

“No, we didn’t hear anyth-” Leela elbowed Amy in the ribs.  “Ow! Oh, I mean yeah, we know all about that.”

Rodriquez narrowed his eyes at the weak smile that played across the intern’s face, but continued his story.  “Anyway, the NNYPD started to get a flood of calls about missing persons, and then they started to lose contact with whole parts of the city.  It’s a good thing that the Mayor called the DOOP and ordered the city evacuated when he did, because everything with a computer in it in the whole damned city went dead fifteen minutes later. Hovercars, automatic doors, traffic signals- everything.  We couldn’t even get DOOP fighters into the city.  They fell right out of the sky.“

Bender, who had been carefully edging away from the group, and toward an extremely valuable necklace that was on display at the other end of the store, couldn’t help but catch the last bit of meatbag conversation.  “What about all of the robots?” He demanded, casually shoving Amy out of the way to stand facing the Lieutenant.  Amy tumbled to the floor, more from clumsiness than from the robot’s hard shove in the small of her back.

As Fry helped Amy to her feet, Rodriguez surveyed the robot with obvious distaste.  Leela wondered whether the man didn’t like robots, or just this one in particular.  She couldn’t fault him for the latter prejudice, she decided.

“Most of the robots made it out okay.” Rodriguez grunted.  “Most everyone else got out of the city too.”  Leela had assumed as much.  It was the only explanation for the fact that all of the vehicles were missing from the streets.  “There were a lot that didn’t though.” he added.

“Why?  What killed them?” Leela asked, confused.  “We didn’t see any signs of a fight.  Is it a virus?  But then why did you shoot at us?”

Lieutenant Rodriguez shook his head.  “No, it’s no virus, I can tell you that much.  Viruses don’t carry gauss rifles.”  There was a beat.  “Well, except for the Paramecia of Phage III.”

Before Rodriguez could continue, a brilliant red-orange light, seemingly as intense as the noonday sun to Leela’s dark-accustomed eye, exploded outside the jewelry store window.  The whump whump whump of plasma rifles echoed through the open doorway, along with a sharp crackling noise that Leela did not recognize.

The radio that Rodriguez wore at his belt sprang to life.  Apparently these radios didn’t contain computer chips.  “Sir, you’d better get out here.” the still-anonymous soldier, who was standing guard behind the low wall in front of the store with Michaels, said nervously.  With a final hiss of static, the radio cut off.

The lieutenant and the PE Crew ran from the store and crouched behind the wall that Michaels and the other soldier were using as cover.  A bolt of what looked like lightning sprang into existence somewhere beyond the far end of the intersection, blasted its way over their heads, and disappeared into a second story window.  Leela could smell the ozone from the bolt’s passage.  It took a moment for Leela’s eye to adjust to the light from the DOOP flare, but what she finally could see again, she felt her blood run cold.  An army was marching toward her; there had to be 50 of them, whoever they were.  They were mostly humans, though there were a few robots.  No aliens, though.  Leela realized.  Some sort of separatist movement?  She wondered.  Right now it didn’t much matter though.  The important thing was that they were each armed with some kind of weird weapon that apparently shot bolts of electricity. Gauss guns, Lieutenant Rodriguez had called them.  And against that, there were three DOOP soldiers, herself, and her three friends, and giving a weapon to Fry or Bender might actually tilt the odds toward the bad guys.  Five against fifty.  Even Zapp Brannigan would probably have realized that they were royally boned.

“Alright, so what’s the plan?” Leela whispered into the lieutenant’s ear.  Rodriguez lowered his rifle for a moment to address her.  “The plan is for us to do our jobs, and for you four to get the hell out of here.” He said firmly.  All the while there was a constant stream of gauss bolts screaming over the top of the wall that was now their only shelter.  Leela, used to being in charge, began to argue, but Rodriguez cut her off.  “Look,” he said, “Until I get orders that say otherwise, I’m in charge here.”  A particularly large explosion echoed off the nearby skyscrapers.  “I received instructions from General Brannigan himself that this building must be protected at all costs.  The federal velour depository is on the third floor, and that, for reasons that I was told are on a strictly need-to-know basis, it is of the utmost strategic importance.  I was ordered to parachute in here and guard it with my life, if necessary.”

“But, you don’t stand a chance!” Leela protested. 

Michaels snorted while he finished reloading his weapon.  “Ya don’t say?” he said, dripping sarcasm.  He muttered something else, but it was lost over the loud report of his rifle.

“Look, I don’t have time to argue with you.  Now, my men and I will try to give you some covering fire while you three- hey, where’s the robot?” Bender sauntered out of the jewelry store, busily shoving something into his chest cabinet.  “-while you four retreat through the building’s back door.  Take the plasma rifle that’s sitting on the ground over there; its previous owner doesn’t need it anymore.”

Leela reached out and grabbed the weapon.  “I still think this is wrong.” She said.  “We can’t just leave you here for… whatever those are.”

“You can, and you will.” Rodriguez replied.  “Now get the hell out of here.”  Without another word, he turned away, brought his head and his weapon over the top of the wall, and started blasting away at something downrange.

Sensing that further argument was useless, Leela motioned for her friends to move.
Corvus

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #151 on: 08-10-2008 07:31 »

Exciting stuff... now I just can't wait for the next installment! Curse you and your cliffhanger!  :D
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #152 on: 08-10-2008 22:30 »

the next chapter should be up in a week or two.  I gave it to JN and THM yesterday, but I wont be near the computer for awhile to actually read what they have to say... 

 
Quote
Curse you and your cliffhanger!
One of these days I'm going to have to write a cliffhanger where someone is actually hanging from a cliff...
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #153 on: 08-10-2008 22:51 »

...Mind-bogglingly good as usual. Just when I was thinking this chapter was probably going to be something about a confrontation with Walt, you throw us way more loops again.
I presume this fracas all has something to do with that nice little cyborg Chelsea?

I always love how even in these dramatic sections, you still manage to weave in some humor - "Momopoly" and Zapp being "absolutely 100% almost positive" that everyone had left; haa   :D
So very like him.

Something I noticed recently: Reading your work - all of it - is like reading a book of Futurama...And by that I mean, not "like an episode" as such, but like the show transmuted or transformed into book form. Unfortunately I can't seem to put it any better than that. Hope that sufficiently conveys my meaning, or at least somewhat adequately.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #154 on: 08-11-2008 08:04 »

 
Quote
I always love how even in these dramatic sections, you still manage to weave in some humor - "Momopoly" and Zapp being "absolutely 100% almost positive" that everyone had left; haa 
So very like him.

  What's really funny is that neither of those jokes are actually mine  :D.  justNibblin came up with the first one and fine tuned the second.

km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #155 on: 08-11-2008 14:29 »

Ah; as if JN doesn't pack enough into his own work. So it's becoming a bit of a collaborative effort then... You know, I actually did the exact same thing to Corvus once - singled out a particular line, only to have him tell me you had come up with it. So there you go.

Well, I liked the idea of the rifle-toting 'Paramecia of Phage III', too...

But honestly, your somewhat book-like style is compelling and always draws me in. You take what could be an episode and extrapolate it, adding description, detail and drama; interspersed with humor throughout, giving it additional depth, until it becomes very much your interpretation.
JustNibblin

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #156 on: 08-12-2008 00:40 »
« Last Edit on: 08-12-2008 00:40 by JustNibblin´ »

   
Quote
Originally posted by soylentOrange:
What's really funny is that neither of those jokes are actually mine      :D.  justNibblin came up with the first one and fine tuned the second.


SO is (and has been) way too generous.  I wish I could take more credit for this story, but nope, just a joke here and there.  Definitely not a collaboration,  99.99999% SO. 

BTW, I've seen the next update.  I think it may be one of the finest things SO has written.  Hope he gets back online soon.
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #157 on: 08-12-2008 21:19 »

just popping in to say this: <soup nazi> no update for you! </soup nazi>

I kid, I kid.  Well, actually, I dont.  No update just yet, but I promise I'll try and get it up after I'm done with the move.
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #158 on: 08-12-2008 22:36 »

Oh, where are you moving to again?

 
Quote
Originally posted by JustNibblin':
BTW, I've seen the next update.  I think it may be one of the finest things SO has written.

That.. is truly a scary thought.
Surpassingly spectacular?
We shall see.

  :evillaugh:
JBERGES

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #159 on: 08-14-2008 16:33 »

Nice update SO.  Things are moving along great and it's all quite interesting.  One quick question:  I was a bit flummoxed by the aside where you imply Amy and Bender are gone and introduce a Gauss gun before we know what was is.  Was this just a stylistic temp-jump to the future of have I missed something important somewhere?
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