IT STINKS!!! ...or not.

[on:]

Here ya go. New movie review thread. Knock yourselves out.

[Reply #1 on:]

I thought I called 'dibs' on naming the new thread. However, it just so happened that you picked my name - "It Stinks! The Movie Review Thread" 

[Reply #2 on:]

Best...threadname...ever!!

Just wanted to say that, for now. I'll edit in a review here soon.

[Reply #3 on:]

Evan's Review for Bowling For Columbine:

A documentary by Michael Moore.

Now, I've never reviewed documentaries before. They're not at all like normal films, what with a plot and character and all, so most of my usual crap is useless. But, I can sum this movie up in a sentence.

GO SEE THIS MOVIE!

Honestly, that's all I can say about this film. Awesome.

For those of you unaware, this documentary takes a sometimes troubling, sometimes humorous look at the problem of gun violence in the U.S. The first half of the film asks 'why are Americans so gun crazy?' and the second half deals with 'okay, here's why...but why do Americans feel so scared that they think they need guns?'

The film does seem almost stream-of-conscious sometimes, jumping off into different topics when you feel the original topic hasn't been fully explored yet. I'd really like to see what some non-Americans think of this movie, if they ever get a chance to see it. Does the U.S. really come off like that?

Michael Moore does get criticized for being a huge jerk, and he deserves it for some of his actions. Notice how I said 'some'. The finale, where he gets the most slack, is his final interview with National Rifle Association president Charleton Heston.

A lot of people got upset because Moore just metaphorically blasted this sad old former actor out of the water. Personally, I agreed with the critics at first. Then, the second time I saw it, all my sympathy for Heston was gone. After all, Heston did speak at large, pro-gun and pro-NRA meetings at Denver, Colorado less than 10 days after Columbine and one less than 24 hrs after a 1st grader shot and killed another 1st grader in a school near Flint, Michigan. And Heston showed no remorse for the hurt community. In fact, he openly mocked the Denver mayor who told the NRA not to come. So, in my opinion, Heston deserves much worse than just having a few unpleasent questions asked at him.

There is a lot of disturbing images in this movie. It does make me feel ashamed to live in a country where the first instinct is to kill. It doesn't matter about your policies, go see this movie!

Final Grade: A+

[Reply #4 on:]

copied and pasted from the last thread, cause it was the last one posted before it was closed.

FINAL DESTINATION 2
Blood, nothing but blood the whole way through. It was glorious. I'd never seen that much blood. blood blood blood blood blood.
 
 

Show spoiler

consequently i'll never be able to look at SUVs, logging trucks, motorcycles, garbage disposals, refrigerater magnets, microwaves, fire escape ladders, pigeons, panes of glass, elevators, white vans, PCV pipe, car air bags, barbed wire fencing, oxygen tanks, and barbeques the same way ever again.

i hope they make a third one. With an even bigger body count! With blood that just rains from the sky!

[Reply #5 on:]

 

Originally posted by Venus:

FINAL DESTINATION 2
Blood, nothing but blood the whole way through. It was glorious. I'd never seen that much blood. blood blood blood blood blood.

Watch Brain Dead, you'll thank me 

[Reply #6 on:]

Kirikou-some cartoon of an African Legend I happened to stumble across...very good.

[Reply #7 on:]

i agree with evan... bowling for columbine was the best movie/documentry ive seen in a long time.....i loves my gun...loves my gun

[Reply #8 on:]

Bowling for Columbine again

I went to see this movie last Saturday since the local newspaper gave it a die-roll "6" (the best/highest kind of die-roll), and it won 1st prize on the Bergen film festival last year.
It's a very good movie, probably the most entertaining documentary I've ever seen (Discovery should learn from this guy).

However, it's not objective, it's the tale of a one-man crusade against the naive gun control laws of the United States. Any NRA-man foolhardy enough to stand in the crosshairs of Michael Moore's cameras will be ridiculed and questioned to such a point where you start wonder how much editing it took to make them appear so incredibly stupid. But hey, it's fun to watch!
[gun-toading farmer] I always keep a loaded gun under my pillow. You know, there's all kinds of crazy people out there. <mad look on face>

Also, there's a bunch of strong scenes too, but most of them have already been shown in other documentaries on the subject, or in war documentaries. If you've seen a couple of those, and not being irreparably scarred by them, you can safely see this movie without getting sick.

I rate it an A.

[Reply #9 on:]

Boy, I"ve seen a heap of movies out lately. Here is a fast run down:

8 Mile: Not that bad actually. They say "Fuck" a hell of a lot though - and alot of hand movement whenever someone needed to talk... and I thought more would happen, for instance I figured the movie would move on to progress to his record deals and publicity stuff. Maybe a sequel is in order?

Analyze That: What a shame this movie wasn't as funny as it really could have been. It almost feels to me that they made it too soon, or it feels rushed. I say this because it doesn't seem someone proofread the script to make sure it was funny and not too "oohhh, I saw that coming, I geddit" in most situations. Stick to the original, it was good.

Catch Me If You Can: I liked this. It was different, and a nice comeback for Leo too. It felt like a long movie, but there was enough momentum to just keep it going, which made it all alright. I felt like I was sitting there wondering "how could this guy really have done this in real life?" for most of the movie, distracting myself from the movie itself. Advice: Go see the 'making-of' doco before seeing the movie, and you can understand it easily without distracting others    It was a good film overall.

Hot Chick: Hah, I didn't originally want to see this, but got talked into it by a friend. Actually, if you like that sort of smacked-your-friend-in-the-face-with-a-bat sort of humour, you'll enjoy this. It had some pretty good laughable bits, which impressed me. And other characters that were so overly ditzy and fake you just had to laugh to wonder how they do it with a straight face. Adam Sandler's cameo was also cool hehe

LOTR- The Two Towers: I'm sure this has probably been done to death. I'll just say, as I thought of the first, very impressive! Even more gruelsome than the first, which led me to wonder why parents would take children to the movies. It was quite violent! But, a great epic nontheless.

Two Weeks Notice: Another movie I wasn't willing to see but got talked into. I'm not really a Sandra Bullock fan, nor a romantic comedy fan, but this movie was average enough to get a giggle or two out of me. This was more of a wait-til-it-comes-out-on-video movie for me, and hoping it's a rainy day too.

I-Spy: Well, this is a step back up for Eddie Murphy who made that HORRIBLE movie that was set in space a few months ago (I can't even rememeber the name, it was that bad). I feel this movie maybe rides on the starring names more than on content itself sometimes in the film. Alot of things went under-explained, or could have been elaborated on, making this movie good for the younger kids who want a laugh but not much substance. Alot of "fake" moments, but that's what the movies is about   

Movies to come-
Looking forward to Chicago, actually. Just to see what the hype is all about.
They looks a little blargh. I haven't seen a full trailer yet, so there's hope for Wes Craven yet.
Like Mike, hmmm, no.
I'd like to see Star Trek: Nemesis, for the fact I'm a little partial to Star Trek. The trailers look just interesting enough to drag me into it.
About Schmidt, I'll wait till I age a few more years to get interested...

Whew, that's it for now   


------------------

I'm an expert at not caring. The secret is to stop giving a rats ass

[Reply #10 on:]

 

Originally posted by Ricky:
[gun-toading farmer] I always keep a loaded gun under my pillow. You know, there's all kinds of crazy people out there. <mad look on face>

That 'gun-toting farmer' is actually Terry McNichols, the brother of one of the guys behind the Oklahoma City Bombings. He was arrested for the bombing, but never convicted. His brother and Tim McVeigh were arrested AND convicted. So, yes, he's a pyscho.

[Reply #11 on:]

I've seen Bowling for columbine and I loved it. But like it's been said here, the "movie" is not objective.

Like the part were Michael Moore goes to see a canadian "getho" and shows a quiet and nice neighborhood. It's like no one is poor in ontario. Well, we have our real gethos too!

But the documentary is still a brilliant one. (and you better enjoy here 'cause as french canadians, we don't believe in refunds)

[Reply #12 on:]

 

By Ricky:
I went to see this movie last Saturday since the local newspaper gave it a die-roll "6" (the best/highest kind of die-roll)

Wait...so your critics review movies by rolling dice? *shakes head* You and your strange norwegian customs...

 

By Ninaka:
Well, this is a step back up for Eddie Murphy who made that HORRIBLE movie that was set in space a few months ago (I can't even rememeber the name, it was that bad).

Not that anybody cares, but um..."The Adventures of Pluto Nash" was the title. Kill me.

[Reply #13 on:]

FJ: Oh god, yes that was it. Honestly, I can watch any movie and think it's alright. But this particular one, I actually wanted to walk out on. I couldn't believe how BAD it was. BAD BAD BAD!!! *kills you, then pokes her own eyes out*

[Reply #14 on:]

Haha, you actually SAW it? You are a better man than I.

I know it must have been painful, but you can take comfort in the fact that you were probably the only person in the entire world to pay to see that movie.

[Reply #15 on:]

Well I didn't pay for it, the boyfriend did, so maybe that's a good thing depending on how you look at it.
"Cool! An Eddie Murphy movie... this has gotta be funny!" Boy, were we eating our words soon...
Shockingly, there were a fair amount of people in the cinema at the time because there were alot of big ad promos before it opened, lying to us to make us think it was actually any good. Bastards.

[Reply #16 on:]

matrix 2 and 3 both out this year......that is good...top dog starring chuck norris was the worst movie that ive ever seen. it was 2 dollars in a discount store

[Reply #17 on:]

The moives I'm like to see is:

DareDevil
Undercover Brother
Jackass The Moive
T3
Matrix 2

[Reply #18 on:]

Minority Report: I loved this film. It's just interesting to see people's visions of the future and stuff. And the eyeballs rolling away was quite...amusing.

Star Wars Episode II: I liked this one as well  Especially the beginning scenes in the city!

[Reply #19 on:]

*sings*
I saw Two Tow-ers!!
I saw Two Tow-ers!!
I saw Two Tow-ers!!
*stops*

Ahem, it was brilliant although it did grind to a halt with the Aragorn-Arwen a few times and I would have liked to see Gandalf fight a bit more at Helms Deep cos he kicked that Balrogs red hot glowing ass.
Oh, and forget Liv Tyler, Éowyn's my new favourite LOTR babe!

I loved Gimli and Gollums funny bits, like when Gimli falls off the horse and says:
"It's ok, that was deliberate!"

[Reply #20 on:]

Best film ever....Hulk Hogan in "No Holds Barred." Best scene ever...when the Hulkster (stretching his acting muscles by playing a character named Rip, who is a wrestler) throws this suit-guy off a balcony into some electrical wires, killing the guy. Awesome.

[Reply #21 on:]

Dude, no way. I guess No Holds Barred is ok if you're in a drama kind of mood, but for flat out laughs you MUST see Suburban Commando. The best scene is when this secretary tells Hulk to "take a seat", and he literally picks up a seat!

This really shows why Hulk Hogan is the best. Most wrestlers wouldn't be able to carry a joke like that, and most comedians wouldn't be able to carry a chair up over their heads. Hulk gets to show off his two best assets as an entertainer here, and it makes for a classic scene.

Don't get me started on Thunder In Paradise!

[Reply #22 on:]

Two words:

Mr. Nanny.        

[Reply #23 on:]

3 Words - "Santa With Muscles"

[Reply #24 on:]

Okay, I'm a double-posting. So sue me.

Evan's Review of Mr. Show's Run Ronnie Run

Before tonight, I'd never reviewed a movie that had never been released before. I'm probably one of the few people ever to see "Run Ronnie Run", so I guess I'm special, in that sense. Its unfortunately been sitting on the shelf for a few years, which is surprising, cuz it's pretty good.

For those of you who don't know, this movie is the last hurrah of the HBO sketch comedy series "Mr. Show With Bob and Dave". It's very important to keep that in mind while watching. If you're not a big "Mr. Show" fan, well, you're going to miss out on a lot of inside jokes. The film would be fine if you'd never seen "Mr. Show", but it's even better if you have.

Quick plot -- Ronnie Dobbs is a mullet-headed loser from the deep south whose only talent is being arrested. He's in love with his ex/ex-/ex-wife and he looks after their 3 kids. Ronnie likes drinking and being an asshole.

After he repeatedly shows up on a "COPS" like show, a producer from Hollywood offers Ronnie his own show. The premise - that each week Ronnie visits a different city and gets arrested there. Ronnie accepts, becomes popular, does fame change him?, he still is in love with his ex-wife, blah blah blah. We've seen it all before.

What's great about this movie is that it basically is a series of skits loosely tied together into a movie. There's dozens of celebrity cameos, from Dave Foley of KitH to Jack Black to Trey Parker and Matt Stone from "South Park". The songs are great, as well : "Ass-kicking Fat Kid" and "Kick 'Er In the Cunt" are toe-tappingly hilarious. The movie works at such a frantic pace, you'll just have to sit back and enjoy the mindlessness of it.

I can't imagine this film getting a wide release or making much money in theaters, but I bet it would be big on video. (see The Kids in the Hall's "Brain Candy" and Broken Lizard's "Super Troopers" ) That is, if it's ever relased. You can 'find' it online, if interested.

Overall rating: a B.

[Reply #25 on:]

The Fog (1980)

It was actually pretty good movie and I am a little bit surpised. Pretty good effects and story is fashinating. I recommend...

[Reply #26 on:]

Do you think it'd be cool if Peter Jackson made a film of The Hobbit?
I haven't read it yet but would it be a good film storyline?
Considering what a great job he did so far with LOTR.

[Reply #27 on:]

I seem to remember reading somewhere that he was going to make the Hobbit originally, but the film company he went to said "Argh!" so he went somewhere else, who offered an even bigger budget and he decided "Ah stuff it, I'll just do the LOTRs instead." Slightly more ambitious.

**Some one please tell me this has already been posted somewhere else here...**

Anyway, the Hobbit is just as great as the LOTR, definitely not as dark however, and then, the book almost always concerns from the point of view of Bilbo, though there are some deviations to other characters at several points. 

[Reply #28 on:]

I think peter jackson has decided to move on from making tolkiens books. Although a hobbit movie would be good. i wonder who would play bilbo

[Reply #29 on:]

I think who they had as Bilbo in The Fellowship Of The Ring fitted him quite well. 

[Reply #30 on:]

Hobbit movie? I don't think so.
Remember the Star Wars spinoff movie witht those awful little...things. What 's their name?

[Reply #31 on:]

Ewoks? Horrible little things. But if you are comparing the two ideas then I think you misunderstand, The Ewoks was a spin off but talk of a Hobbit movie would be, I think, and I hope, of the Book The Hobbit that John published almost two decades before TFOTR.
But if you're not comparing them, then I apologise sincerly. 

[Reply #32 on:]

 

Originally posted by FishyJoe:
Wait...so your critics review movies by rolling dice? *shakes head* You and your strange norwegian customs...

Yup, convenient and easy. The entire movie review summed up in a tiny gif image. I, for example, rate your post a

[Reply #33 on:]

I saw Minority Report tonight too. Great film, I really enjoyed it. Another dark atmosphere that went with Blade Runner, another of P K Dick's works... or another film based on another of P K Dick's works, but not quite so black as Blade Runner, though I love both films. It's funny, I love it how the spiders look really sinister, yet technically they work for the forces of good.
Yeah, this film was good. The acting was fine, the plot was thick, thought provoking, and while some things you saw a mile away, some of them you thought you saw a mile away, but then change right at the end. 
The plot kept moving, but at no real point were you left thinking "Huh?" 

8/10
(Incidently, Blade Runner gets 9.5/10, Total Recall gets 8/10 too - just a round up of films based on Philip K Dick's stories - I think I'm going to look for some of his books. I know they won't be exactly like the films, but I find the things he writes about, or wrote about I should say unfortunately, absolutely fascinating!  )

[Reply #34 on:]

Speaking of, I rented Minority Report a while back, but I don't think I ever reviewed it.

I thought it was inbetween "alright" and "good". The story was good, but oy, the family flashback scenes were sappy even for Spielberg. And the action scenes could have been better...the car chase in particular was pretty boring and unrealistic.

[Reply #35 on:]

Ace Ventura Pet Detective

I haven't seen this  for a long time. Yesterday I watched it and TV with my Mum and she enjoyed it more than me.

she doesn't understand what going on so I have to tell her what happening. It was really for funny to explain it to her. like in the moment when Ace was in that mental hospital pretending to be crazy and he does that slow motion act, my mum said that he was nuts and I said to her that he was pretending to be crazy so that he can get some clues but she says that he's crazy anyway for the way he to does and acted there are some greta and funny moments in this movie.

my best moments was When Ace finds out that the Lady Cop in which he has a fling with was really a man and it has looked The crying game playing in the background.it was an amazing and well spot on and I love the look on Jim Carreys face. Also I like it at the very end where everybody finds out that she was a man where Ace turned her around and you can see insomething in her panties  My mum was screaming with laughter.

[Reply #36 on:]

Do not see Undercover Brother. It is as bad as The Adventures of Pluto Nash (see above for shameful admittance).

The entire storyline has been done in one way or another. Everything is a stupid cliche, or role-reversal between the blacks and whites. Sure, it has a couple of laughs, but if I hadn't paid for the damn thing, I would have walked out...

It was really lame... Maybe I would have liked it if I was 10 years younger and stupid overacted comedy was funny... But, if you think you're going to see a new witty spin on this genre, you'll be wrong.

Basically it's a crap version of a black Austin Powers. There is the evil baddy who has some obvious flaws in his personality, and the good guy/main character from the 70s in big shoes with a mean 'fro, and the really hot chick who is designed as the love interest but is really working, in tight leather, for the baddies.

Oh no, I hope I didn't spoil the movie for you...

[Reply #37 on:]

The Truman Show

Since it was on BBC1 last night, i thought i'd make a post. I like this film quite alot actually. It seems wacky but yet serious at the same time. It has the Jim Carey stupidity but it does fit the film well as it's in moderate doses. You just want Truman to step out that doorway and be free. A great film worth watching.

[Reply #38 on:]

I was going to write a review about a movie, but rule number one prohibits me from talking about it.

[Reply #39 on:]

I also think The Truman Show is fantastic. It's one of my favourite films, and I really like Jim Carey in this one. The music is one of the best features of it, quite moving. 

8.5/10

I also watched Men In Black II recently. Lots of fun and full of laughs, but not really as good as the first one unfortunately. You cared more about the characters in the first one, and things flowed more easily. Still, that aside, still worth seeing for the humour.
7/10