I hate that which you love: movie reviews

[Reply #560 on:]

 

Originally posted by coldangel_1:
He cast Winnona Ryder as Spock's mother in the new Star Trek. There's nothing more he can do to us.

Yeah, it's gonna be interesting.  I can just see it now.  Sarek yelling "All right, who took my car keys?  Oh damn it, Spock, I bet it was your mother.  She used to be a kleptomaniac, you know..."

[Reply #561 on:]

10,000bc

a big meh. I was expecting more man on beast spear fights, but no, there had to be some romances bullshit. It was alright i guess, had me laughing in a few inappropriate moments

Show spoiler

HA! The girl died! It was all in vein HAHAHA! ...oh... she's alive again   

Also, where in africa did the main dude start in? Where does it snow in africa?

[Reply #562 on:]

 

Originally posted by chay's head:
10,000bc

a big meh. I was expecting more man on beast spear fights, but no, there had to be some romances bullshit. It was alright i guess, had me laughing in a few inappropriate moments

Show spoiler

HA! The girl died! It was all in vein HAHAHA! ...oh... she's alive again   

Also, where in africa did the main dude start in? Where does it snow in africa?

I don't think he started in africa, probably somewhere in russia came down through east asia then sudan and then back up to egypt.

That, or he had a car.

[Reply #563 on:]

  Russia -> East Asia -> Sudan -> Edypt is much longer than africa -> Egypt...

[Reply #564 on:]

Cloverfield

Just saw it yesterday, at a reduced price movie house.  I liked the story; too much camera jumping around for my taste, but enjoyable.  Nice special effects, also.

[Reply #565 on:]

One-Sentence Reviews


10,000 BC

Neatly clears up all the mystery surrounding Egyptian Pyramid construction - naturally it was done by woolly mammoths.


Gone With the Wind

It blows.


Sweeny Todd

Consuming human flesh has never been so much fun, except that time I did it while on acid.


Jumper

Some nifty effects, but whiny emo Darth Vader and the random pointless secret society of bad guys made me want to teleport out of the cinema.


Run Fatboy Run

The touching and inspirational have shoved the funny into a tight corner where it's having a panic-attack due to claustrophobia.


Death Sentence

Who knew that ugly dweeb Kevin Bacon could kick some serious ass?


Casablanca

Still oozes coolness and smells like tobacco.


Appleseed (2004)

It's still the same old battle, but I think I liked it better with traditional animation.


Bender's Big Score

The team behind Futurama may be just a little bit rusty, but it's still a moderately awesome return to the 31st century that is sure to gain quality and momentum over the course of the upcoming sequels.

[Reply #566 on:]

Horton Hears A Who

The best part of working at a movie theater is i get to watch movies early. Horton rocked, it was just as awesome as i thought it would be. There is one character, named Katie. I can't even describe her but god is she a trip, i laughed my ass off everytime she showed up. A+

[Reply #567 on:]

Justice League: The New Frontier

Justice League supers during the McCarthy era (I wasn't around so I didn't get any possible undertones of reality, but whatever), fight an uber baddie by the name of... The Center! ooooOOOOooooh spooky!

Minus a million points for Kevin Conroy not voicing Batman... and Robin having the gayest version of his costume evar! 

B+

[Reply #568 on:]

That was the costume Robing had in the comic. If you are insinuating that Darwyn Cooke did something wrong, then I shall have to fight you.

[Reply #569 on:]

Bender's Big Score!



I think it did the series a favour! I personally thought the last season of Futurama was the weakest, and was pretty much expecting more of it here, but I was surprised. MAJORLY SURPRISED. Good job, guys! There were a few flaws, but none worth bringing up! SATISFACTION UNLOCKED.

B+

One point of contention: Lars' face scared me. He looked like something dug up from the fanart section of PEEL, where you insert yourself and fake muscles into it and have sex with the cartoon characters? That seems kind of overspecific but I've already committed myself to it! 

[Reply #570 on:]

 

Originally posted by Venus:

Horton Hears A Who

Oh, I wanna see that one!

[Reply #571 on:]

I saw Juno today. It was sweet. I genuinely liked the whole atmosphere of it (note: I rarely have strong feelings one way or the other regarding things such as movies). I enjoyed the way they did the opening credits where everything looked hand-drawn as she was walking along the streets to get to the store. Also the fact that she was so amusing in her reactions, her attitude and perspectives on different things were interesting, even admirable, especially for someone who is only meant to be 16. The soundtrack was nice too. Unlike last weekend when I did my ritualistic movie-going Saturday and saw Run Fatboy, Run. It was good, had its moments, but it didn't specifically make me think "I'm glad I saw this movie".

 

Originally posted by coldangel_1:
Casablanca

Still oozes coolness and smells like tobacco.

Were you able to acquire a non-scratched version? Or is this review based on the missing pieces special edition?

[Reply #572 on:]

I got another copy.

[Reply #573 on:]

Jumper C+

The Mist C

I'll write reviews later.

[Reply #574 on:]

 

Originally posted by Venus:
Horton Hears A Who

The best part of working at a movie theater is i get to watch movies early. Horton rocked, it was just as awesome as i thought it would be. There is one character, named Katie. I can't even describe her but god is she a trip, i laughed my ass off everytime she showed up. A+

Damned.  Venus posted.  And she enjoyed a movie that didn't involve body parts being hacked off with a rusty machete.

I rarely make it to movies these days, but I'll remember this one when it comes to PPV.

[Reply #575 on:]

Southland Tales, 30 mins in: what the hell am I watching here? 

[Reply #576 on:]

just read it's wiki... wtf?

[Reply #577 on:]

Horton Hears A Who

Fantastic little movie, very fun.
I'm just glad that I'm still a big kid at heart and that I enjoyed it. (i hate kids) but I don't hate myself and I didn't hate this movie.
All scenes with the Who of WhoVille where hilarious, but the ones with Horton and other animals with exception of Katie (those eyes and the mouth) and Tommy, where dull and annoying.

It still gets and A

--------------

30 Days of Night

What can I say.
Has to be one of the worst Vampire movies I have seen and I've seen some shockers.
A good premise, but badly written, the characters all know each other well so it felt like the writers and director thought there was no need for character development, or explanations. YAY.
The 'Vampires' looked like and acted like vampires with cerebral palsy. Not nice but true.

This was BAD, and not the good kind Bad.

D

[Reply #578 on:]

 

Originally posted by DogDoo8:
Horton Hears A Who

Fantastic little movie, very fun.
I'm just glad that I'm still a big kid at heart and that I enjoyed it.

I think I may see that next time I go to the movies. That or The Eye, whichever is on at a better time. I want to become a regualar cinema-goer..Everybody needs a hobby. Mine will be to get fat.

Also, you lied, Mr DogDoo8. You said you'd review Jumper and The Mist but you dinnae.
Actually I saw those movies within a few days of each other in Sydney. The Mist was great, at least how it ended. Makes you chuckle if you're sadistic at least. And Jumper was...I don't know, it was after Fat Cat's bed time and it didn't really help to keep me awake.

[Reply #579 on:]

I watched King of Kong on DVD and I have to say it is the best movie about video game records I have ever seen. It was completely memorizing, and even suspenseful. Bad guys, good guys, kids who mock both... This movie was fantastic. Great editing.

[Reply #580 on:]

Which King Kong?  Both were fairly memorizing.

[Reply #581 on:]

The Simpsons Movie

Yeah, I know, it's been out for months & months, but I just saw it.  I thought it worked well in the longer format; I enjoyed it very much.  My only very minor complaint - Arnold Schwartzenegger as opposed to Rainier Wolfcastle; wha?  Other than that, I thought it was well worth the money.

[Reply #582 on:]

 

Originally posted by DrThunder88:
Which King Kong?  Both were fairly memorizing.

King OF Kong, the one about the video game Donkey Kong

[Reply #583 on:]

Woah, how'd I miss that?

[Reply #584 on:]

 

Originally posted by DrThunder88:
Which King Kong?  Both were fairly memorizing.

Don't you mean Three!

And less we forget Queen Kong the movie.

[Reply #585 on:]

10,000 bc

it was good. could have been better though.

and i give it B-   

[Reply #586 on:]

 

Originally posted by DogDoo8:
 Don't you mean Three!

And less we forget Queen Kong the movie.

There was also King Kong vs Godzilla and that even more wretched version of the original that shall not be spoken of.

[Reply #587 on:]

The Invincible Iron Man
Animated origin story of Iron Man involving Chinese hoodoo and/or voodoo, a bit similar to the TMNT story where ancient evil monster dealies have risen and it's up to Iron Man and his various suits to stomp them into oblivion.

The animation was really crappy in some places and I didn't like the story much either.

Best wait for the live action movie that should be the best thing evarrr to come out before TDK.

D+

[Reply #588 on:]

 

Originally posted by Nicky boy:
10,000 bc

it was good. could of been better though

Could have!

Michael Clayton

Clooney stars in the title role, a law-firm "fixer" who gets involved in a class-action lawsuit against a huge corporation, when the leading litigator (Tom Wilkinson) goes crazy and jeopardises the companies defence.

Excellent thriller with standout performances from Clooney, Wilkinson, Tilda Swinton and Sydney Pollack.  Nothing is ever straight forward, and there are twists and turns to keep you hooked until the end.  Fab.

9/10

[Reply #589 on:]

The Hammer
So much better than I expected it to be. I am in love with Adam Carolla. It's only playing in about a dozen cities, so go see it if you're in  one of those cities. Or else.
And I have no idea how it got an R rating. 
A

[Reply #590 on:]

The Kingdom

This is a superbly exciting, evocative and thought provoking movie. It is concerned with the joint saudi / FBI investigation of a Jihadist terror attack in a saudi work compound for resident foreign workers. It is both an action movie and thought provoking film at the same time, combining action, supense, with depth of consideration about the complex political and cultural issues at work.
The last scene in the film is a timeless gem, I nearly missed it as it was part of the usual niceties of everyone coming back home, job well done etc.

A+++
 

[Reply #591 on:]

I'm a lazy man, so I'll only bother to write...
One-sentence reviews


The Brothers Solomon

It's as funny as that infection I had in my arm -
the one with all the pus.


The Core

Once again we are taught the valuable lesson:
natural disasters hate famous landmarks.


Shortbus

Sex is the last refuge of the jaded and directionless, and it was just made boring.


Perfect Stranger

A dramatic revelation like that could have probably done with more hints along the way so we could say "oh, now I see..." instead of copping-out with a retrospective retelling at the end, but it was okay otherwise.


Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978 remake)

The drama is clunky by today's standards, but this still stands as classic sci-fi and one of the better remakes, and you get to see Leonard Nimoy without pointy ears.


Sphere

A huge spaceship turns up on the bottom of the ocean and Samuel L. Jackson doesn't utter a single motherfucker.


Farscape: The Peacekeeper Wars

A satisfying conclusion to all the loose ends and a thrilling action-packed finale to a sci-fi epic killed off before its time.

[Reply #592 on:]

 

Originally posted by ~FazeShift~:
Southland Tales Revolver, 30 60 mins in: what the hell am I watching here?   

[Reply #593 on:]

gaschief, try Syriana for politics, The Kingdom was like Team America: World Police compared to it. 

And it needed more Jeremy Piven:
"Can we do something about these situations?" 

There Will Be Blood
"I'm an oil man, y'see?"
Daniel Day Lewis can be a bastard coated bastard with bastard filling and totally deserved his kudos (won't say Oscar until I've seen the other nominees efforts), but the rest of the film was kinda slow, at the start I actually thought both he and Paul Danos characters were nice until things started going a bit mental and the ending was kinda like... ooook, that's it? 
Also, weird music, I kept thinking,
"THX, the audience is listening...
Grampa: TURN IT UUUUP!"

B+

I also saw Gangs Of New York for the first time recently, and Day-Lewis was great in it too, but needed more Liam Neeson, he's great. 
"Let's fight!"
"Dem's fightin' words!"
*fighting commences*

A+

[Reply #594 on:]

Black Sheep

One of the best were-sheep movies I've ever seen.

[Reply #595 on:]

The Mist
Meh. Thomas Jane was horrible. I didn't even realize it was him until I checked imdb. He was much better on Arrested Development. Pretty much all of the actors were awful and annoying. Decent ending.

C-

[Reply #596 on:]

Be Kind Rewind

Great use of props and imagination from music video director Micheal Gondry. This is how remakes should be made.  All heart and no budget...   

I wonder how Futurama would look like Sweded?

[Reply #597 on:]

Team America: World Police

Yes, I know, it's been out forever.  I just rented it for the 1st time, and couldn't stop laughing.  One thing about the guys from South Park is they're equal opportunity offenders; everyone is nailed in this one.  Team America (and, by extension, the US) is characterized as quick to destroy everything in sight, then ask questions later; liberal American actors are severely castigated (Alec Baldwin, Jeanneane Garafolo, Sean Penn, etc).  The UN is portrayed as ineffective & weak, Islamic terrorists are stupid & corrupt, North Korea is run by a homicidal madman with a bad temper ("Herro, Hans Bricks" ).  Particularly, Kim Jung Il singing "I'm So Rone-ry" had me in stitches.  Everyone in this film is portrayed as an idiot, and it all works.  Be warned; has profanity & puppet sex... 

A-

[Reply #598 on:]

Well, that is basically how I see movies, myself, seattlejohn01... rented!!  I just rented
The Mist  I really thought this "little" movie did Stephen King's Novella sci-fi justice!!  That music starting halfway through... so haunting and "grande opera" like.

That horrible hopelessness of their unknowable situation... making decisions in despair and fear...AND just over the next hill-  one's whole perspective can change from one of dire, life ending decisions to WTF!!! did I just do!!!  I thought.. very poigniant, such as it mirrors life when the way looks bleak... a very social commentary. 

Here's a link for all you "Misties" who appreciated the movie for the work of art that it is:  http://www.themistmoviedvd.com/
I've seen it four and one half times, now~~~I'm watching the movie right now!!  Every time I see it, I get more awed by it awesomeness!!  This is a true work of art that won't win any "Oscars," but it should; just like It's a Wonderful Lifewas never really appreciated until after the director had died, decades later.

Then BlockBuster had The Kite Runner  This movie is a perspective of Afganistan that doesn't involve all the "Big Guys."  It's the perspective of the "average Joe," er, "average Ackhmed," that really brought on the tears.  I like a good cry; if it's a beautiful, artistic offering... this was.

Tonight, I'm watching Atonement  Good movie if you like epic romantic movies... I do.  And this is.  I'm so glad the gal in this movie finally got out of corsets!!  She was worried that she would be pigeon holed for the life of her carreer in "peroid pieces," wearing corsets the rest of her life.  I don't think she has to worry any longer!! She was good in Pirates of the Caribbean and she's good in this.  And the fellow is sweet and remorseful in this.  You can just feel for his plight.

[Reply #599 on:]

the 40 year old virgin

its been out for ages, i know.

very funney! great commedy!

B+