The nightmare that is Daytime TV

[on:]

Flipping through channels durring my lunch break and stopped on the Tyra Banks show. Didn't want to make a thread just for Tyra, since the show sucks, so feel free to post about any evil daytime tv, including soaps, talk shows, and court shows. (which make up 95% of daytime tv in the US)

I stopped flipping in horrified fascination at the sight of a skinny white guy in a suit apparently feeling up a large, obese fat man who had no shirt on. The first thing he said after I stopped was "Now, this is about a C-cup." He proceeded to manipulate the man's breasts and stomach, describing the surgical procedures he recomended. Apparently, he was a plastic surgeon, and the man had had gastric bypass surgery which left him with pounds of loose flab all over his body. Quite repulsive.

The next segment was about a woman who has a terrible secret which she is ashamed of: her areolas are too large. Despite his husband's constant assertions that this does not bother him, she does everything she can to avoid letting him see her naked, which has interfered with their sex life. Trya helped illustrate this (american TV, so they can't just show us an exposed breast, or even a crude drawing of one) with a grapefruit and  half of an orange. They gave a lot of emphasis to the fact that she is moritified by this and the measures she goes to to prevent people from learning her "horrible secret." Well, until she decided to go on national TV to talk about her problem. I didn't watch the rest of the show, but I'm sure they poured some generic self-help cliches at her and followed it up by bringing back the plastic surgeon.

It was amazing, I could actually feel my IQ dropping. By the time a commercial came in and broke me out of the trance, I had forgotten how to tie my shoes, and managed to drool on myself while trying to get out of my chair.

[Reply #1 on:]

Daytime British Television is sadly dull.

Remember the old reruns of Supermarket Sweep? Oh the excitement!

[Reply #2 on:]

The Jeremy Kyle Show. Each episode has at least one: "Look at me. You're scum - yes or no?"

[Reply #3 on:]

Just daytime?
TV in general sucks.

Lift yourself up from the masses, buy or download your favourite shows, never watch anything crap again.

[Reply #4 on:]

Faze: That's what my DVR is for, but lately there hasn't even been anything worth recording. I do buy a lot of series on DVD, when they're released.. but trust me, as much as prime-time TV sucks, daytime TV is worse. The only thing worse than daytime TV is sunday morning TV.

I find my TV is on a lot, but I don't actually watch it much; I'll spend 15 minutes flipping around looking for something tolerable, then within 5 minutes I'm either working on the computer, reading, writing, or otherwise ignoring the television. An hour later I'll look up, realise the tolerable program has ended and something truly unbearable has replaced it, and repeat the cycle. So really, I'm just wasting electricity.

[Reply #5 on:]

The Tyra show is just funny to me.  I don't know, I guess I like to see things crash and burn.  I saw one episode on "Why do men go to strip clubs?", like its a big mystery or something.  I can't believe they devoted a whole episode to that question.  They had psychologist and everything, when I could have answered it in like 2 seconds with a nice little analogy comparing strip clubs to Baskin Robbins.  But I still find myself watching the show every now and then, but I think its because I've had a crush on Tyra since I was 12.

Anyways daytime tv sucks, but nothing is worse than the stuff that comes on from 4-6 am.

[Reply #6 on:]

We get lots of news, infomercials, and trashy talk shows like Jerry Springer here.

[Reply #7 on:]

Greg Behrendt, one of my stand uo comedy heros, has gotten his own day time talk show. I would like to see it just because of his great stand up work.
He was the one who wrote the book "He's just not that into you." And he made that phrase up.
So yea, watch it.

[Reply #8 on:]

I've seen the Greg Behrendt show, but it didn't really keep my interest.  He was helping this guy get a date, but he kept on calling him "Dude" and "Bro".  It kind of got annoying, so I changed the channel.  I haven't seen his stand up but I'm pretty sure it has to be better than the show.

[Reply #9 on:]

I'm surprised nobody has mentioned Rachael Ray's show yet.  It's on where I live in the morning so that counts as Daytime TV. 

[Reply #10 on:]

Ever notice in the UK the disturbing amount of Lawyers and Debt Assistance Companies advertisements that show?

There are hundreds of them! One after the other!

[Reply #11 on:]

Here is a great parody of the kind of crap we Brits have to put up with every day of our lives on daytime TV, from the excellent 'That Mitchell and Webb Look' sketch show:
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z116eYMMe2M

[Reply #12 on:]

Heh, that is hilarious. Why does BBC America not show it? :sigh:

[Reply #13 on:]

 

Originally posted by Nurdbot:
Ever notice in the UK the disturbing amount of Lawyers and Debt Assistance Companies advertisements that show?

There are hundreds of them! One after the other!

Well the only way people who watch daytime TV regularly can make any income (other than by benefit scrounging) is by suing people for accidents that weren't their fault. Something like slipping on a grape in Lidl or getting hit by a rickshaw while bending over to pick money up off the street. So it's the perfect time to show these adverts -- key demographics are ... key.

[Reply #14 on:]

But how do they succeed? there is so gooddamn many of them.

They must open, last for a month then shut themselves down or be absorbed into another company...

[Reply #15 on:]

Nurdbot: well, that happens of course, but you'd be surprised how low the overhead is for a law firm that only handles cases which can be settled out of court.

Wow, got a new candidate for "Humanitarian of the year" from Judge Hatchett:

 

Some racist fuckhead said:
Ah, just remember that as you go through life hating white people, that white people are always there to help you out. It's your own kind that fuck you over all the time.

White men aren't bad people, we're better people, that's why we rule the world.

After the tape was played, he just walked out saying "I've got nothing more to say, I didn't come in here to be insulted."