evan
Urban Legend
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« on: 12-20-2005 02:19 »
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New thread.
I'm a bit behind everyone else, so I just recently saw "The Chronicles of Narnia" this week. A friend of mine had two free tickets, so I decided to go with him. I though, hey, I like fantasy movies and I like big-budget CGI films, what could possibly go wrong?
A lot.
Now, my relationship with the novels is short. I remember reading this book as a child and not being too thrilled with it. In fact, I hardly remembered anything from the book, but that could have been because I read it 15 years ago. But, as time passed, I thought I would give it another go.
The major problem with Narnia is that the children don't actually do anything relevant to the plot. Aside from being the "chosen children" that will bring about the fall of the White Witch, they don't do much for the duration of the movie. You'll notice it after the first few scenes in Narnia. They bitch and snipe at each other, but when it comes down to business, it's Aslan the Lion that inspires the troops and makes the big decisions. The children are little more than window dressing to the plot. Perhaps it's the child actors, but the kids' roles come off as one dimension: Peter is demanding (or "a dick" as my friend eloqantly put it), Susan wants to be mature and logical, Edmund is insubordinate all the time, and Lucy is the freakin' cute kid who still believes in magic and innocence. I'm surprised that any of them ever got along well enough to not die right away.
For a magical land, Narnia seems quite empty. There's so much going on we never get any taste of the characters. Unlike LOTR, Narnia is all event/event/event with little or no plot or character motivation to tie it all together. The Narnia scenes seem rushed, and somewhat important scenes are cut out (like how Peter transforms from holding his sword like a shovel to being a knight). Perhaps not all books should be made into movies.
But since it is a Disney film, at least the effects were great. It really looked fantastical, which is nice.
C
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~FazeShift~
Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
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« Reply #2 on: 12-20-2005 15:14 »
« Last Edit on: 12-20-2005 15:14 »
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Nope, but I just watched March Of The PenguinsA delightful romp.... about penguins. Narrated by Morgan Freeman. Marching to their mating ground, finding a mate. The baby ones are schooo cute and the fall over and have dogpiles/crowd surfing sessions. They nearly have the funny sound effects like in Futurama when they're slipping on the oil. A few sad moments too when they die of cold or starvation. Great cinematography, the Southern Lights, some really nice majestic pans and underwater shots. B+
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Lee Roberts
Liquid Emperor
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The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe: The story is classic and if you have ever seen the original you can tell a big different between the two. Although you can't beat a classic, I would say this film was pretty impressive and deserves a B+.. and for the performances from the actors... erm yeah Anna Popplewell gets a A+ for being hot and the obvious and only sex appeal of the entire movie.
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Nixorbo
UberMod
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by evan: but when it comes down to business, it's Aslan the Lion that inspires the troops and makes the big decisions. Well, he *IS* Jesus.
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Nasty Pasty
DOOP Secretary
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King Kong
Jesus F'n Christ this movie is good.
A+
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Nixorbo
UberMod
DOOP Secretary
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As a closing projectionist only. As in, the person who has to stay at work until it's over, which is currently about 2:15 am on a weeknight.
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Ralph Snart
Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
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Nix, that sucks! By the time you're finished with the tapes and other projectionist duties, all the good bars are closed and the decent women well passed being taken advantage of... OK, let's petition -marc- to give Nix a living wage being a mod!
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Nixorbo
UberMod
DOOP Secretary
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Before I forget, my Aeon Flux review:
Story: D+ Acting: C Action: C+ Eye candy: B Charlize Theron's costume design: A
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Nasty Pasty
DOOP Secretary
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I wish they had shown more Kong vs Trex stuff.
I can safely say that part of the movie was where I was completely in awe.
And as for the length of the film, I really didnt mind it at all. I personally like longer movies.
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Nixorbo
UberMod
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by evan: Kong grabbing a T.Rex with a jaw in both paw and tearing its head open. That was awesome. What you meant to say was Kong grabbing a T Rex with a jaw in both paws, ripping its tongue out with his mouth, breaking the lower jaw, and then forcing the upper jaw into the thing's brain.
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Ralph Snart
Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by Venus:
I was waiting for some more girl-on-ape action but i gues they're saving it for the unedited directers cut. My gawd. That sounds so... perverted! Ralph 'Almost Speechless' Snart
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Melllvar
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by Nixorbo: Charlize Theron's costume design: A Pictures please!
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iliketowankalot
Professor
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Yeah Kong was Great, I dont think it was too long, screw all you weak bladder fools. Only complaint? not enough girl on monkey action. Favourite part? the Kong Rex fight scene, although the giant penis cuming out of the swamp and eating the mans head was really cool too
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~FazeShift~
Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
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Originally posted by spacepilot3000: I never had the urge to go to the bathroom, and I had a large soda. And he was given the custom title: Power Bladder McSteel! Must. See. Kong.
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~FazeShift~
Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
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« Reply #38 on: 12-29-2005 18:58 »
« Last Edit on: 12-29-2005 18:58 »
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Kung Fu HustleBrilliant, it's like if Hero was remade by the guys who did Airplane. It's got: Cartoon violence, regular Kung Fu violence, unecessary slapstick violence, little movie references, an awesome catchy soundtrack. Best lines: After tapping the lethal Kung Fu master bad guy on the head and running away to hide: "Is he conscious?!?" and: "I realised then that good guys never win, I want to be evil!I want to be a ruthless killer!!" "... Let's get some ice-cream." *looks up* "Where?!" It's completely rediculous and over the top, and there's a love "story" tagged on, but it's got bad guys in top hats choregraphed dancing while holding axes, and crazy Kung Fu, so I forgive it. B+
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