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coldangel

DOOP Secretary

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Fry: First you don't want to have sex with me, now you tell me to get the hell out - make up your mind, woman!
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Frisco17

DOOP Secretary

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Classic Xanfor, classic!
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Seymour_My_Hero

Professor

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OMG Xanfor, I know Frisco just said it was awesome, but man, that is pure comedy gold!
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Frisco17

DOOP Secretary

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I know isn't the title awesome!
Frisco's a genius!
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La Belle Leela

Starship Captain
   
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Fry's mangled version of Judas Priest's "Painkiller" somehow failed to get Leela in the mood.
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coldangel

DOOP Secretary

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lmao @ the title!!!1!! pure genius lol omfg!!1!!
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coldangel

DOOP Secretary

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Professor: Leela! You look hot!
Leela: (ignites stove) So do you.
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Seymour_My_Hero

Professor

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Professor: Leela, I never realized how hot you are.
Leela: Professor, your on fire.
Professor: (In a daze) I know your on fire. Baby, you're smokin' hot!
Leela: Oh Lord...
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i_c_weiner

DOOP Secretary

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Salesman: Ah, I see you've found the "Accidental Fire Insurance Collection" nob! It's a hot commodity!
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futz
Liquid Emperor
 
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Professor: Come on baby light my fire!
Leela: Shhh Professor! It's 1947. The Doors haven't been invented yet.
Professor: Humm? Oh my yes, yes. My body temperature is finally starting to return. Aaahhh! Thank you Leela.
Leela: OK. So will you pull your pants up and stop leaning on the other oven? People are starting to stare.
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Optimist

Poppler

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Professor: Fascinating. This must be one of those retro-manual operated suicide booths. Lela would you mind? Leela: My pleasure.
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LayZ341

Professor

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Professor: This isn't what I meant when I asked if you could cook thai.
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NastyInThePasty

Professor

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I'll probably be picking a winner tonight, so if anyone else wants to add a caption, get 'em in now.
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Xanfor

DOOP Secretary

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Leela (thinking): What is it with the beehive hairdo and the nerds?
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NastyInThePasty

Professor

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Great job, everyone!  While everybody pitched it with some funny captions, I've got to give the biggest hand to LayZ341. What can I say? I have a weakness for terrible puns. 
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coldangel

DOOP Secretary

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Amy: No means no, Doctor Z - I'm not that kind of girl!
Zoidberg: But I could be the creature from your black lagoon...
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DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary

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Amy: Don't lie to me, Zoidberg. I saw you run me over with that lawn mower. Zoidberg: You may have seen a lobster matching my description behind that mower, but I ask you, "How could Zoidberg operate the deadman's brake with these rubber alibi bands on his claws?"
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futz
Liquid Emperor
 
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Amy: I'm beginning to wonder if a daily physical is really necessary.
Dr. Zoidberg: You can't be too careful with fin fungus.
Amy: But I don't have fins!
Dr. Zoidberg: Really?!?
Amy: Yes, and my professors at Mars U. only give me a physical once a week.
Dr. Zoidberg: Quacks, all quacks! Besides it's covered in the health plan.
Amy: Oh!?! Well, OK then. (Ziiiiiiip) The safety word is "chowder".
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Debris

Crustacean

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Amy: I see you've been using my hairspray again.
Zoidberg: I see you've been wearing my clothes.
(ya I don't like it either)
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NastyInThePasty

Professor

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Amy: You know, Dr. Zoidberg, dumpster diving is a lot less fun than you let on. So, as punishment, you have to wear those rubber bands on your claws for the rest of the day.
Zoidberg: But why the strap-on mohawk?
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