1000 Things to Learn

[Reply #160 on:]

545: Aparantly nobody doesn't like Molton Boron (sorry if this was said before i didn't actually read everything @_@)

[Reply #161 on:]

544: Broken microwave + Supernova = Time travel.
543: Aks and Xmas are proper grammer.
542: Benders full name is Bender Bending Rodriguez.
541: everythings better with a red pill.
540: Its possible to live more then a Lifetime.
539: NNY has an Owl problem.
538: some robots have Human Hearts.


P.S., My first Post!!!!

[Reply #162 on:]

537: When skiing, don't forget to yell "Trees down!"

536: An idea is a headache with pictures.

535: Hermes has to flush some things.

[Reply #163 on:]

534: Calculators have a carry the two button
533: Robots don't say ye

[Reply #164 on:]

532:Bed sores hurt.

531:If you wanna score, you gotta fake that you're in love. Just look them in the eye, start crying, and say 'I've never been so happy'.

530:Bender finds shooting DNA at each other to make babies offensive.

[Reply #165 on:]

529:  Nibbloians fear they are cute. 

528:  Nibbloians believe Fry is the last hope of the universe! 

[Reply #166 on:]

527: Robot's are interested in sex only for the perversion.

526: Screaming skulls are considered romantic.

[Reply #167 on:]

525: Robot hell is an actual place.

524: Bender can run on Nutritious Mineral Oil...if he has to.

523: If you're a man, getting shot in the groin with a Z ray will hurt your sperm, but only the first time you're shot.

522: Rubbing Miracle Cream on yourself will give you many miraculous powers, but you can't command sea creatures.

521: Be careful with robot streetwalkers, they can be transvestites...

[Reply #168 on:]

520. Hell is in New Jersey.

519. Even if it takes an hour to write it wont take an hour to read.

[Reply #169 on:]

518: Superhero's cause alot of colateral damage.

517: The most dangerous animal of them all is the Zookeeper.

516: The United States is part of the world.

[Reply #170 on:]

515: Leela wants to see how it ends.

[Reply #171 on:]

514: Your music is bad and you should feel bad
513: Never buy 8 of anything

[Reply #172 on:]

512: The Planet of the Moochers' inhabitants' wallets are always in their other pants.

511: Bender likes Fry's gut tender.

510: If you're a billion miles from nowhere, you'll probably only find a Howard Johnson's.

509: When Adlai blinks, he enjoys it.

508: By the end of the day, either Leela or Adlai is gonna have only one eye.

[Reply #173 on:]

507: The "Daily Growl" isn't a reputable journal of opinion.

506: It doesn't matter how funny your apron is, Leela won't let you cook Nibbler.

505: Finding a pet who poops starship fuel is not as good as finding love.

[Reply #174 on:]

504: I f a mobster gives you the kiss of death, they might just be gay

[Reply #175 on:]

504/a. Only if they use their tongue just a little.

[Reply #176 on:]

503. Global Warming is caused by rotting corpses of sunbeams.

502. The Native Martians are a proud bead-loving people.

501. It's considered bad form to kiss on your girlfriend's parents' planet.

[Reply #177 on:]

500: The western hemisphere of Mars is the best hemisphere.

Whoo! Half way there!

[Reply #178 on:]

499: Ted Turner trophies make islands sink.

498: Caffiene speeds up evolution by millions of years.

497: Cigars work underwater, and can be used for arson.

[Reply #179 on:]

496: Turtles much prefer the cool climate of Holland.

[Reply #180 on:]

495: The letter "T" looks like a man wearing a hat.

494: The Zookeeper's lair is nicer than a cave.

493: Computers are twice as fast as they were in 1973.

[Reply #181 on:]

492: Robots heads not only explode with paradozes, but with paying extra for your car!

491: Books are released at least a millenium after their written.

490: Light is blunt.

[Reply #182 on:]

489: Bender not only has "swarthy Latin charm", but can also speak in a "British" accent.

[Reply #183 on:]

488: Wade Boggs, goes down smooth.

487: Planet Express is like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood.

[Reply #184 on:]

486: A bomb in a case is just like a head in a jar.

[Reply #185 on:]

485: conan O'brien lost his freakishly long legs in the war of 2012

[Reply #186 on:]

484:  It should've been Zoidberg who got caught on film eating the Poplers! 

[Reply #187 on:]

483:  In the future, it is "Can I axe you a question?", not ASK...   so funny...

[Reply #188 on:]

482:  Lottery tickets that smell like a mule are losing tickets.

[Reply #189 on:]

481: Mules are available for purchase on hangers.

480: Sherpas are too.

479: The Nintendian's have three different kinds of ships.

478: The hubble telescope looks deceptively like an Omicronian cruiser.

[Reply #190 on:]

477: bone-itus is a funny name for a horrible disease

[Reply #191 on:]

476: Thompson's Teeth are the only teeth strong enough to eat other teeth.

[Reply #192 on:]

475: Karoke is the sure fire way back into a girls heart

[Reply #193 on:]

474: The quickest way to a woman's bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in.

[Reply #194 on:]

473: Fry hates bottles.

[Reply #195 on:]

472: Morbo has serious funk.

[Reply #196 on:]

471: Apparently, Marta Stewart really knew how to use her ass

[Reply #197 on:]

470: In the year 3000, Snoop Dogg is a Supreme Court Judge.

*Only 300 to go to Professor!*

[Reply #198 on:]

469: Don't put metal in the microwave.

[Reply #199 on:]

468: If you get raped like Fry then dont mention it to anyone