I Can't Believe it's Another Quote Game!!! 2nd try!!!

[#440 :]

Arg! This game is cursed! No one remembers to pick a winner! C'mon Krokei, I have faith in ya!

Unwanted Top Of The Page Discontinuity

[#441 :]

Yeah, yeah, I'm alive. I was gonna come back sooner but I was playing music. With my band, woo!

Yeah. It was a tough decision, but in the end I decided with:

Spacedal11

Congratulations.

JBERGES, your faith was well placed.

[#442 :]

Yes! The first time I've won this game. I've asked questions before but that's because no one remembered to post a winner. Sorry guys.

You are in a scary movie, and you're all alone at your house when the phone rings. The killer tries to freak you out, you say?

[#443 :]

Killer: Excuse me? Hi! Do you have a minute? I live in Detroit and my car broke down and I need to get indoors because my brain's real sick and it needs this medicine but I need some place to stay. So I'm murdering you. Start screaming.
Me: I don't believe that story for a second.
Killer: It doesn't matter, I'm murdering you.
Me: There's no bus service in Detroit.
Killer: Scream like a little girl or my psychopathic alternate personality will shoot.

-The mugger, Leela, and Fry from "Less Than Hero" (edited).

[#444 :]

dam you old man

[#445 :]

Oh bother! I have like an hour left before I'm bumped so I'll just give this one to Dr. Thunder.

[#446 :]

Okay, so continuing off Spacedal's situation (since hers was unfairly unresponded-to), the killer has been apprehended, but as you go to leave your house you notice a hungry pack of wolves has taken up residence on your lawn (or sharks if you live on a houseboat).

[#447 :]

me: it's every man for himself. (to passer by) help me.
passer by: NOBODY CARES! NO BODY CARES no body cares NOBODY CARES.....

[#448 :]

Me- The killer was impervious to our most powerful magnetic fields, yet in the end, he succumbed to a harmless sharpened stick... (laughs)
Friend: I'm just glad the nightmare is over.
Me- well, actually, now we have to deal with a hungry pack of sharks. So basically, a new nightmare has begun.
Friend- God help us!

- lines from 'Fear of a Bot Planet', and stuff I made up for the middle so it would run together and make sense.

[#449 :]

Me:I'll never get away with primative technology. What I need is this wolf pheromone. The most potent aphrodisiac known to wolfkind.

(I try to spray it on a nearby tree, but have it backwards, so it sprays on my face)

Me: Uh-oh!

(I am dogwolf-piled on)

Wolves: We're so into you!

Me: ... Oh my!

Farnsworth, Zoidy - The Deep South (edited)

[#450 :]

Thank you Dr. Thunder.  I owe you.

[#451 :]

You're lucky.  I fixed you up with a low APR.  In the meantime, wolfpile on JBERGES!

[#452 :]

Having been bit by one of the said wolves, you are unsure of whether it is rabid, a werewolf, or just plain mean, but know you must do something soon.  You do/say:

[#453 :]

(After all of us are bitten, my friends fall to the ground).
Me: Heh heh, lightweights. (A full moon emerges from the coulds) Oh right, werewolves.  (I turn into a werewolf and go on a rampage)
-Bender from CotH (edited)

[#454 :]

And the winner is... uh... hmmm.

I'll give this another day before I pick a winner...

 

[#455 :]

Friend: Hey buddy looks like we're both werewolves.
Me: Yeah being werewolf is alright but being a vampire is better.

Bender A & 1- Farnsworth Parabox (EDITED).

[#456 :]

Me: You know thw worst thing about being a warewolf. They don't let you take Full moons off!

Friend:*Slaps head with hand*

[#457 :]

Congrats, none of the entries were stupid!

But... DrT still takes it.

[#458 :]

Pfft, I could have won two days ago.

After a hard night of rampaging, you (a werewolf apparently) are cornered by an angry mob bearing silver bullets, silver knives, sticks with silver handles, and tube socks filled with pre-1965 quarters.

[#459 :]

Me (about to die):  I'm not sad. Because I finally found someone as murderous as me! It's like I always say: "Make new friends and keep the old. One has silver... the other... silver.

Benders:  Farnsworth Parabox (edited)

[#460 :]

Me: "So I'm not normal, the rest of us aren't normal and that's what makes us great - like Frankenstein's Monster, he's a wierd homicidal monster who smells like he was stitched together from decomposing corpses, and was."
Frankenstein's Monster: "Damn right!"
Me: "...And Dr. Jekyll's a schizophrenic, amoral crackpot"
Jekyll: "Ohhhea."
Me: "...Baron Samedi is a Rastafarian zombie"
Samedi: "Tally me banana!"
Me: "...Dracula's a nut from Transylvania"
Dracula: "Blaaaah!"
Frankenstein's Monster: "And Wolfman, you've got that Lycanthropy thing."
Me: "I already did! So, angry mob - do you wanna be like us, or do you wanna be like everyone else... with no terrifying ancient curses whatsoever."
Mob: "That's the stupidest thing we've ever heard!" *Everyone beats me to death with silver*

Fry and others, The Cyber House Rules (Modified beyond all recognition)

[#461 :]

*A gunshot is heard*

Me: Whoa! (looks down to find a bullet lodged in chest) Who put this in here?

Member of Mob: Nooo! Are you people satisfied?This gentl--uh--unique visitor, is dying! And we'll never know why she came!

Me: I'll tell you...with my final breath. I came here with a simple dream. A dream of...killing all humans. And this is how it must end? Who's the real unsightly doggy thing here? Not I. Not...I... (dies)

Bender and Fry: Anthology of Interest I (edited)

[#462 :]

I'm having fun imagining
 

Frankenstein's Monster: "Damn right!"

It's got to be Wernstrum.

[#463 :]

Hardcore Christian argues with another Hardcore Christian playing a Christian Card game. (Like Pokemon cards)

Christian 1: I'll use my Jesus card. Your never beat that

Christian 2: Aaa haa... I'll play my... ZOMBIE JESUS!, Waahahahaaa   

Prof says on top of ship in The Deep South and in other various Ep's.
Well it made me laugh

[#464 :]

Now I don't want to be the one who does something original breaks the chain but each version of that last scene ended with the main character dying which makes it kind of difficult...

OK then, after being silvered to death, you wake up in Hell, as is the inevitable fate of all PEELers werewolves... wait, I was right the first time. What do you say/ do/ have done to you in a horribly painful manner?

[#465 :]

Satan or something: Instead of being tortured, the decedent shall hereby be expelled from Hell and never allowed to return.
Me: Oh cruel fate! Can I really never return to this dark pit of brimstone?
Satan: The decedent is hereby sentenced to live as dispatchers live. He will perform tedious duties and deal with imbeciles, until he becomes obsolete and is forced to retire at less than half-pay.
Me: Dispatch?  Aw man!  Couldn't you have just gotten me cast into a lake of fire?
-Raoul and Bender in TMLH (edited)
-The Judge in FoaBP (edited)
-Bender in BBoIC (edited)

[#466 :]

In situations such as this, tradition dictates that I give everyone else an extra 24 hours or so to come up with something and then pick Dr T anyway.

[#467 :]

Devil (Finishing song): 

Killing People, Eating Owls
Waking neighbors with all of your howls!
You'll pay for crimes malign,
Knee-deep in revolting brine
In the eternal full-moon’s shine
Enduring tortures for wolves and canines!
Trapped forever here in werewolf hell!!

Robot Devil: HiOR (completely rewritten)

[#468 :]

That seems like 24 hours or so. Go Thunder!

[#469 :]

The tradition continues...wait, what comes after Hell?

Hmmm...okay, so you're on a trans-Atlantic flight, perhaps heading to a gatheration of PEELers, when God suddenly raptures the world's ass.  Sadly, the pilots, aircrew, and all of the passengers except you (apparantly) are good Christians.

[#470 :]

Gee, looks like it's time for the 'ol Doc Tee cliche here ...

Narrator: (voice-over; on TV) You're entering the vicinity of an area adjacent to an airplane cabin. [An hourglass and sundial float past an airplane window.] The kind of place where there might be a god or some kind of weird savior. [An old sandal, a man getting his feet washed and a half-eaten loaf of bread fly past.] These are just examples. It could also be something much better. [An airplane lavatory door rotates toward the camera and opens.] Prepare to enter The Rapture Door. [The door opens onto the titles, which shatter like glass. The show begins and the first scene is a pan over a post-apocalyptic airplane cabin. The camera glides past piles of clothing items.] As per your request, please find enclosed the last man on the flight.

[The camera stops moving. The man stumbles out of the lavatory. He walks among the aisle, gawking at the empty seats.]

Man: [on TV] Finally, solitude. I can fly airplanes for all eternity. [He loses his ability to fly commercial jets.] It's not fair! It's not fair! Wait, it's not that bad. I can still fly the private jets. [His realizes where he is and screams.] It's not f --! Well, lucky I know how to skydive! [He pulls a parachute out of the overhead storage compartment.  An anvil falls out of the pack and lands on his foot.  He screams in pain.  The airplane crashes.  His head flies out the cockpit window.] Hey, look at that weird savior!

The Scary Door sequence from "A Head in the Polls", edited.

Edited again, to better fit the biblical tradition of honoring guests by washing their feet for them.

[#471 :]

Christian Friend: I said, don't do it you'll make GOD cry!

Me: Well I'm always the first to toot my own horn.

Fry from AOI2 and Spanish Fry. Edited.

[#472 :]

God: Come on, kids! You're late for Hebrew school!
(collective groan from the pilots, aircrew, and all of the passengers except me)
Some Passenger: I don't want to go...
Some Other Passenger: Every Judgement Day and Doomsday's the same thing...
(everyone files into God's crazy flying minivan, and they drive off)
Me: I find this post-apocalyptic wasteland very confusing.

-random LA people (one modified), Fry, The Cryonic Woman

[#473 :]

As fond as I am of a "weird savior," I am fonder still of God driving a minivan.  I knew he had Iacoca in his pocket.

[#474 :]

Tongue Luck is alive! :dances:

[#475 :]

It seems Tongue Luck has died again, well someone needs to post a new situation:

Your victory is complete, the killer robot army has crushed the last remaining resistance and you are now undisputed emperor of the Earth. How do you abuse this power?

[#476 :]

if i die tell my wife hello

[#477 :]

Me: At last!  At last I have the power to make the world love me!
(My robot minions begin strangling me)
Robot engineer: Oh sorry, that'll fix itself in a few days.
-Fry and the Robot Devil in TDHAIP (edited)

[#478 :]

So... after two and a half days we have two suggestions, one of them the obligatory guy-who-doesn't-quite-understand-the-point-of-this-game. I think it's pretty clear that the winner has to be benderfender DrThunder88.

[#479 :]

Well... It´s been two days and I want to play.

You recently got an office job and have, up untill now, gotten along fine with everybody. Today, however, all the paper clips were missing and attention is turned to you and your suspiciously overfull desk. State your defence.