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Nurdbot
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by Nurdbot: Me: So you make the Burgers from free range animals here? Cashier: They frolic in the buttercup field of milk and honey until their first birthday, then we run them through the grinder, the poker and the gouger. Me: French Fry me. = Modified Quote from Love and Rocket I hate posting the last page.
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DrThunder88
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by Nurdbot: Originally posted by Nurdbot: Me: So you make the Burgers from free range animals here? Cashier: They frolic in the buttercup field of milk and honey until their first birthday, then we run them through the grinder, the poker and the gouger. Me: French Fry me. = Modified Quote from Love and Rocket I hate posting the last page.
Just as well...I don't know what the heck that had to do with the situation anyway. I'll give this one away to Wernstrum.
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Nurdbot
DOOP Secretary
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Originally posted by DrThunder88: Just as well...I don't know what the heck that had to do with the situation anyway.
I'll give this one away to Wernstrum. Just a conversation about if the beef is free range (brought up by a normal farm etc) or if it gets the veal treatment. Either way, slaughter house time.
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DrThunder88
DOOP Secretary
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Clerk: That'll be $17.99. Me: I think your forgetting my one dollar millitary discount. Clerk: Well that's only for people in the millitary. Me: What? This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me. Clerk: Look, our policy is if for any reason, you're not completely satisfied, I hate you. Me: I can't afford that. Being poor sucks. What kind of world is this where they advertise things not everybody can afford? (To Clerk) Give me your biggest, longest, most worthless album. (Clerk hands me "Yanni: Live at the Acropolis" ) Oh.
-The 7^11 clerk, Fry and Bender paraphrased from "War Is the H-Word" -Fry paraphrased from "Fishfull of Dollars" -Bender paraphrased from "A Flight to Remember" -Tinny Tim from "Mother's Day"
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JDB
Professor
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Me: Aaaw, I'm sorry. (whispers) I'll fire up the grill.
Bender(slightly changed) 'Loves Labours Lost in Space'
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Tongue Luck
Starship Captain
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« Reply #187 on: 12-14-2004 14:15 »
« Last Edit on: 12-14-2004 14:15 »
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Oh, hell, I forgot about this! JBERGES wins, if only because this happened to me when I was 14, and the turtle's owner (by which I mean my dad) really did sob. You know, I don't think he's ever fully forgiven me. It's not my fault! I fed it! Most of the time. Okay, so I forgot about it for a weekend. And maybe I let a few friends come over and hold it and poke at it without washing their hands first. And I did take it out of the tank to let it walk on the dirty carpet, leave for coffee, forget what I was supposed to be doing, see a movie, run back to my dad's apartment (as soon as the movie was over. I'm not going to miss a bloated, brainless blockbuster just for some stupid turtle), throw it in the tank, then walk off, muttering, "See? No harm done." And I might never have cleaned its tank in the three weeks I was taking care of it (though, to be fair, it was only alive for two and a half of them). But that turtle's number was up, dammit! It would've died with or without my help. At least I still got paid.
Also, DogDoo, that second quote wasn't Fry. It was Bender in Bendless Love.
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