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Author
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Topic: 1000 Things to Learn
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-11-2008 23:01 |
IP: Logged |
321: Bender can be silenced by pressing "mute" on the TV remote.200 to go until I hit Professor!
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-12-2008 01:01 |
IP: Logged |
320: It's an honor to have a president gag on your gas bladder
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-12-2008 19:50 |
IP: Logged |
319: Bender has a doomsday device permanently implanted in his body cavity; the codeword to set it off is...BOOM!
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-12-2008 21:21 |
IP: Logged |
318: The is such a thing as a crack mansion.
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-13-2008 00:51 |
IP: Logged |
317: That don't sound like no golden Marmoset I ever hoid 316: KITT's windshield wipers were evil, even though it never came up on the show
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i_need_help
 Delivery Boy
 
Since: Apr 2004
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posted 02-13-2008 01:48 |
IP: Logged |
315: If robots don't drink they become blind stinking sober. 314: Robots antennas can interrupt satellite tv reception. 313: Cutting Leela's head off won't solve anything.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-13-2008 02:16 |
IP: Logged |
312: Professor Farnsworth was once killed by man eating anteaters.311: Even Decapodians think their planet is crappy. 310: Fry's grandfather wondered if he was dating women only because people expected him to...
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-13-2008 13:23 |
IP: Logged |
309: The best part about handling raw chicken is that it's finger lickin good308: Leela really doesn't cook enough roast 307: Sarge like's to eat off a toilet
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-13-2008 20:30 |
IP: Logged |
306: 1947 can bite Bender's shiny metal ass.305: Bender enjoys having his head buried.
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km73
 Starship Captain
  
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 02-13-2008 21:18 |
IP: Logged |
304: Single female lawyers like bein' self-reliant.303: You can get Neptunian slug in a can, but to really do things right you gotta strangle yourself a fresh one.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-13-2008 22:13 |
IP: Logged |
302: No one wants to visit Hattie's apartment, because it smells of polygrip & cat pee.
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-14-2008 01:13 |
IP: Logged |
301: Purple slug cause nightmarish diarrhea300: Julia Roberts was apparently buried alive
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-14-2008 01:45 |
IP: Logged |
299: Scruffy has more stock in Planet Express than any other employee because "Scruffy believes in this company"
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-14-2008 20:45 |
IP: Logged |
298: Christina Agiulara shouldn't sing in spanish.297: Qween Victoria used to made a cigar out of the US Constitution during her "wild years".
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PazuzuJr
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Oct 2006
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posted 02-15-2008 12:23 |
IP: Logged |
296: Zoidberg is coming to kiss Bender's ass
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-15-2008 22:38 |
IP: Logged |
295: Nixon loved Bender's body as much as he loved Checkers.
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FryBender4
 Bending Unit
  
Since: Jan 2008
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posted 02-16-2008 10:00 |
IP: Logged |
294: Don't be a hobo like Zoidberg
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-16-2008 17:02 |
IP: Logged |
293: rembrandt was blind and had wooden hands292: Grandmothers are subjucated, yet honored
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-16-2008 19:29 |
IP: Logged |
291: Bender's "Gay-dar" does work, or the person in question comes from a planet that likes musical theatre.
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Futurama Llama
 Starship Captain
  
Since: Aug 2006
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posted 02-16-2008 22:02 |
IP: Logged |
290(wow): We can kill ourselves when we get home!
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limegreenaffair
 Delivery Boy
 
Since: Dec 2007
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posted 02-17-2008 02:55 |
IP: Logged |
289: It's all there in the macaroni. 288: A drip and a cricket chirp are interchangeable if you're in a locker room.[This message has been edited by limegreenaffair (edited 02-17-2008).]
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-17-2008 18:26 |
IP: Logged |
287: There is such a thing as a gay weather balloon.
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Futurama Llama
 Starship Captain
  
Since: Aug 2006
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posted 02-17-2008 20:27 |
IP: Logged |
286: There are parts of the Bible he likes and parts he doesn't like.
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-18-2008 21:53 |
IP: Logged |
285: Hermes doesn't put to much effort into naming his protest groups.[This message has been edited by Frisco17 (edited 02-18-2008).]
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-18-2008 22:20 |
IP: Logged |
284: Non humans (like the Being of Inconceivable Horror) can win e-bay auctions.283: E-bay auctions in the future can still be paid for with Money Orders.
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tyraniak
 Urban Legend
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-19-2008 13:09 |
IP: Logged |
282: E-bay is a popular name in the future
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-19-2008 20:07 |
IP: Logged |
281: Fry doesn't like his coffee to shake.[This message has been edited by Frisco17 (edited 02-20-2008).]
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Xanfor
 Urban Legend
    
Since: May 2006
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posted 02-19-2008 21:46 |
IP: Logged |
280: We need to defend our planet against pollution.279: As well as dark wizards.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-20-2008 01:31 |
IP: Logged |
278: Bender is one skeleton away from a Mouseketeer reunion.
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bend_her
 Starship Captain
  
Since: Jun 2007
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posted 02-20-2008 03:47 |
IP: Logged |
277. Cutting ribbons with giant orbital lasers is never a good idea276. Apparently, knowledge of antihelminths has been lost in the future, and the only way to dislodge worms besides Jerked Prunes is to go into the patient's body with miniaturized robots and do battle with the worms until one can stimulate the pelvic splanchnic ganglion. 275. Leela's love for animals doesn't seem to extend to buggalo. 274. In an emergency loss of silverware, xistera serve just as well.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-20-2008 04:00 |
IP: Logged |
273: Bender doesn't like the word "Blackmail"; he prefers "Extortion", because the "X" makes it sound cool.
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Tornadoboy
 Bending Unit
  
Since: Feb 2008
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posted 02-20-2008 15:47 |
IP: Logged |
272: When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.
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KurtPikachu2001
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Sep 2003
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posted 02-20-2008 16:18 |
IP: Logged |
271: Bender is a better chef than Elzar because his ingredient is water! 270: Amy prefers party boards to ironing boards!
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-20-2008 16:56 |
IP: Logged |
269: Helmut Schparkel said Bender's food was acceptable...right before his stomach exploded.
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-20-2008 21:01 |
IP: Logged |
268: Helmut Spargel was named after asparagus.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-21-2008 02:34 |
IP: Logged |
267: If you date a robot, it could cause the end of earth...DON'T DATE ROBOTS!
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-21-2008 21:55 |
IP: Logged |
266: Aparently the 2950s were exactly like the 1950s.
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seattlejohn01
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: May 2007
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posted 02-22-2008 03:09 |
IP: Logged |
265: Signoids like to make pizza with lots of things...that is, SWARMS of things.
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limegreenaffair
 Delivery Boy
 
Since: Dec 2007
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posted 02-22-2008 04:11 |
IP: Logged |
Sweet Zombie Jesus. It's getting really hard to come up with some new ones :/ Well, here's a shot.264: A narweek is about six days. 263: Torgo's executive powder, apply directly to the buttocks. 262: Your maturity can be determined by the presence or absence of The Hulk.
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Frisco17
 Liquid Emperor
    
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 02-22-2008 20:43 |
IP: Logged |
261: Pac-man is a four star general.
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