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Author
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Topic: 1000 Things to Learn
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
 
 Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-25-2007 23:34 |
IP: Logged |
767: Showmanship is important.766: Digital Clocks are not the best thing to grab onto when falling. 765: Even if you don't believe in Santa he can still hurt you.
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
 Since: Mar 2007
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posted 12-25-2007 23:49 |
IP: Logged |
764. Penmenship counts.
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km73
Starship Captain
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-26-2007 02:24 |
IP: Logged |
763: You can't just have your characters announce how they feel, that makes the Robot Devil feel angry.762: There isn't any meat Elzar can't jerk.
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bend_her
Starship Captain
Since: Jun 2007
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posted 12-26-2007 03:46 |
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761. Don't ever eat an egg salad sandwich from a truck stop mens room.760. Irritating the pelvic splanchnic ganglion causes intestinal spasms. 759. When near construction sites, watch for falling humans. 758. There's nothing like a wet soapy flying buttress 
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 12-26-2007 11:38 |
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757. If you want to hide from someone try to blend in with the closest crowd of pimps.
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-26-2007 18:35 |
IP: Logged |
756: Evil Canival Could!755: When falling hope that someone fat gets in your way
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winna
Space Pope
 
Since: May 2001
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posted 12-26-2007 18:48 |
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754-1: Don't panic.
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-26-2007 21:12 |
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750: Space Bandito's can be identified by the sound of their maracas.749: Comets are the icebergs of the sky. 748: Never mix a gundam suit with Richard Nixon. 747: The most puzzling thing about Atlanta is the magician.
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Decapodian
Liquid Emperor
Since: Nov 2006
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posted 12-26-2007 21:38 |
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746: Black holes are not black. Instead, they a blackish-purple colour.
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-27-2007 04:02 |
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745: Zap Brannigan calls his apartment the "Love-Nasium"744: Never carry scissors (no matter how blunt) near the Yarn people of Nylar 4; you'll end up in jail. 743: Satan owes Professor Farnsworth. 742: Hot dogs are crawling with parasites; if you don't believe me, ask Dr. Zoidberg... [This message has been edited by seattlejohn01 (edited 12-28-2007).]
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-27-2007 13:50 |
IP: Logged |
741:Monday Monkey lives for the weekend
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soylentOrange
Liquid Emperor
Since: Sep 2005
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posted 12-27-2007 13:58 |
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740: El Chupanibre is not just a sub-urban legend.
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-27-2007 21:32 |
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739: The qualifications for being a cryogenics counselor are the same as those for being Prime Minister of Norway.738: Never stand next to a wall decoration that contains swords. 737: Aligators can't survive in sewers. 736: Crocodiles however can.
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 01:51 |
IP: Logged |
735: When fighting the Decapodians, if you need someone to enter the activation codes to the global defense system into the central battle computer, it's probably not a good idea to give the targeting codes disk to Ensign "Hugh Man".734: The briefcase carrying the targeting codes uses a lip identification scan, but dislikes tongue.
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soylentOrange
Liquid Emperor
Since: Sep 2005
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posted 12-28-2007 09:06 |
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733: When you see a fiery quasar you might want to scootch a few parsecs to the left.
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km73
Starship Captain
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 09:37 |
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732: If you're dating a ship, you may not want to break up with it near said fiery quasar.731: If you ever need some sheep herded, just ask Hypnotoad. 730: A toaster can feel love. [This message has been edited by km73 (edited 12-28-2007).]
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
 
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-28-2007 13:23 |
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729: you can use jergen's on homeless people with dry elbows
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 13:45 |
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728. Sharks don't have necks.727. Because they don't have necks they don't look back. 726. One drop of the anchovies natural oil can lubricate 10 robots permanetly. 725. Robots need oil changes every 3000 miles. 724. Never say what your pin number is equal too even if no one in the future knows what that means.
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RexSand
Crustacean
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 17:37 |
IP: Logged |
723. If you laugh at Patriotism your a communist
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 19:12 |
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722: Everyone wants to be like Germany, ambitious and misunderstood721: Delivery has nothing to do with the delivery business. It's all about image. 720: There are two kinds of people in life , sheep and sharks [This message has been edited by PhilipJ.FryFan (edited 12-28-2007).]
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 12-28-2007 19:19 |
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719. NEVER hire the Hyperchicken as you lawyer.718. If your last name is Waterfall make sure that all your affairs are in order because you will die soon.
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 00:10 |
IP: Logged |
717: If you manage to kill someone remember to eat their heart, you'll gain all of their courage.
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SonicPanther
Professor
Since: Jun 2006
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posted 12-29-2007 00:25 |
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716: Courage is rich and tasty.
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-29-2007 00:35 |
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715. A spirit CAN be crushed
714. It's OK to eat dolphins, but only if they're stupid
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 01:01 |
IP: Logged |
713: If you're going to eat humans, avoid eating a "smelly hippy", unless you want to have a flashback. 712: Don't send candy valentines to the rulers of Omicron Persei 8; the concept of "wuv" confuses & infuriates them. 711: If something happens while you're in space, it is NOT a space cow. [This message has been edited by seattlejohn01 (edited 12-29-2007).]
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 01:02 |
IP: Logged |
710: New York still has a roach problem.[This message has been edited by PhilipJ.FryFan (edited 12-29-2007).]
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bend_her
Starship Captain
Since: Jun 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 05:04 |
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^^ repeat of #776710. Sly Stallone exists as a skeleton holding a club in the year 3002 709. For some reason, Hanson and Beck still play in the 30th century. 708. "It's all so complicated with the flowers and the romance and the lies upon lies!"
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Bender'sRevenge
Delivery Boy
Since: Jul 2006
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posted 12-29-2007 12:51 |
IP: Logged |
707. Nobody doesn't like Molton Boron.706. That he did, surely not. 705. Ultimate robot fighting is fixed just like boxing. 704. When you see a robot, drink! [This message has been edited by Bender'sRevenge (edited 12-29-2007).]
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PhilipJ.FryFan
Delivery Boy
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 13:09 |
IP: Logged |
703: The last human ghost died
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Bender'sRevenge
Delivery Boy
Since: Jul 2006
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posted 12-29-2007 13:46 |
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702: Technically Correct is the best kind of Correct.
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bohbjm
Crustacean
Since: Dec 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 14:03 |
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701 Whalers live on the moon.
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 14:43 |
IP: Logged |
700: According to Dr. Zoidberg, Santa Claus & Jesus are friends.
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bobbot
Bending Unit
Since: Sep 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 15:54 |
IP: Logged |
699. "Papa done good"
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Bender'sRevenge
Delivery Boy
Since: Jul 2006
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posted 12-29-2007 18:23 |
IP: Logged |
698: Butch runs a pretty good civilization.
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-29-2007 21:48 |
IP: Logged |
697: LA will be exactly the same in 1,000 years. 696: Poverty is a mental illness. 695: It is possible to do it in a suitcase. 694: Axes will have blades even through they cut with a laser.
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Bender'sRevenge
Delivery Boy
Since: Jul 2006
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posted 12-29-2007 22:03 |
IP: Logged |
693: The buttocks is nature's pocket.692: When cleaning a penguin, you have to scrub the black parts too. 691: The Loch Ness Monster's book was right. 690: The higher your IQ, the better chance you have of being paired off for mating during an alien invasion.
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 12-29-2007 22:54 |
IP: Logged |
689. Radiation will trun us into monkeys.[This message has been edited by Bendersfan1221 (edited 12-30-2007).]
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-29-2007 23:35 |
IP: Logged |
I did that one earlier so come up with a new 689.
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 12-30-2007 00:24 |
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688. Robot ghosts outlive human ghosts
687. A broken robot can be used as a hat rack, a door stop, a thermos, or a storage closet
666. (Spooky) Don't buy anything from the bulk underpants outlet
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 12-30-2007 03:16 |
IP: Logged |
665: Don't worry about your hair; if you lose it (natural or other ways like being burned off), just call the hairbot.
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