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Author
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Topic: "I heard questions make you stupid. No, I'm... doesn't"- Stupid questions.
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
 
 Since: May 2007
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posted 03-20-2008 00:43 |
IP: Logged |
A: No, they were all killed in the year 2461, with the second coming of Jesus.Q: Do they still drink beer on St. Patrick's Day in the 31st century?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-20-2008 20:41 |
IP: Logged |
A: Yes but it isn't the main drinking holiday anymore.Q: What is?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-20-2008 21:48 |
IP: Logged |
A: Mother's day. In celebration of Mom's birthday, all robots are required to recharge their batteries by drinking as much nutritious alcohol as possible.Q: What other drinking holidays are there?
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
  
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-21-2008 22:59 |
IP: Logged |
A: President's dayQ: Which president is the biggest drinker?
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
 Since: Mar 2007
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posted 03-21-2008 23:08 |
IP: Logged |
A: George Washington.Q: Why is he the biggest drinker out of all the presidents?
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km73
Starship Captain
Since: Aug 2007
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posted 03-22-2008 11:36 |
IP: Logged |
A: Because the two Grover Clevelands went off the bottle.Q: Why is Hermes so uptight if he "lights things up" all the time?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-22-2008 13:46 |
IP: Logged |
A: Because, like "lighting things up", it's an "old Jamaican tradition".Q: What other "old Jamaican traditions" are there?
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KurtPikachu2001
Liquid Emperor
Since: Sep 2003
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posted 03-22-2008 18:17 |
IP: Logged |
A: Eating cool beans and collard greens is one of them.
Q: Would Bender get along with Crow (from MST3K)?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-22-2008 18:47 |
IP: Logged |
A: No, Bender doesn't play well with others.Q: Who might Bender get along with?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-22-2008 19:26 |
IP: Logged |
A: Himself, Fry, Flexo and to a lesser extent Leela.Q: Who can Hermes get along with.
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 03-22-2008 21:24 |
IP: Logged |
A: LaBarbara, Dwight and various Beuracrats.Q: What beauracrats does Hermes get along with?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-23-2008 02:32 |
IP: Logged |
A: Ganja-cratbot (Bureaucratic level 31)Q: What other robots are bureaucrats?
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-24-2008 11:50 |
IP: Logged |
A: Stamp-o-matic, filotron, and shredderbotQ: What's Morgon Proctor up to now?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-24-2008 18:43 |
IP: Logged |
A: After being dismissed from the Central Bureaucracy, she got a job as a medical assistant in a proctologist's office.Q: Why was she dismissed?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-24-2008 20:28 |
IP: Logged |
A: Repeated stamping failures.Q: How is she qualified to be a medical assistant? [This message has been edited by Frisco17 (edited 03-24-2008).]
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-24-2008 23:02 |
IP: Logged |
A: Because she's so anal & as a bureaucrat made everyone bend over for her. Q: What else is Morgan Proctor qualified to do?
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-24-2008 23:47 |
IP: Logged |
A: Stamp peoples asses for moneyQ: how much money does she make as an ass stamper?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 00:56 |
IP: Logged |
A: Less than Zoidberg makes at Planet Express.Q: How much money DOES Zoidberg make at Planet Express?
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hobbitboy
Bending Unit
Since: Jan 2006
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posted 03-25-2008 07:34 |
IP: Logged |
A: Not enough to be able to afford turkey dogs on a regular basis.Q: Apart from turkeys and, of course, dogs, what is the main ingredient in turkey dogs?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 11:12 |
IP: Logged |
A: Soylent Green; IT'S PEOPLE!Q: What other things does Zoidberg want (but can't come close to being able to afford)?
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-25-2008 12:20 |
IP: Logged |
A: Love, friendship, a home, respectQ: will he ever get any or all of these things?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 13:05 |
IP: Logged |
A: Friendship yes, the rest not a chance in hell.Q: Why is Zoidberg such a loser?
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ShepherdofShark
Bending Unit
Since: Feb 2008
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posted 03-25-2008 15:10 |
IP: Logged |
A: Cause no-one will ever give him love, respect or a mortgage.Q: What does Zoidberg spend his meagre income on?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 17:40 |
IP: Logged |
A: He's so trusting that he loses all his income each month to telemarketers.Q: What SHOULD he spend his meager income on?
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Bendersfan1221
Professor
Since: Mar 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 18:14 |
IP: Logged |
A: He should invest it and buy some food.Q: What should he invest in? [This message has been edited by Bendersfan1221 (edited 03-25-2008).]
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ShepherdofShark
Bending Unit
Since: Feb 2008
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posted 03-25-2008 20:03 |
IP: Logged |
A: Margins. Zoiby wanna buy on margins.Q: What did Zoiby do before his "doctor" job at Planet Express?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-25-2008 21:16 |
IP: Logged |
A: He was a doctor at a circus in Jersey City.Q: Why did he change jobs?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-25-2008 23:14 |
IP: Logged |
A: He was asked to leave, because the circus animals kept disappearing one by one. Q: How did Zoidberg get his doctor's license?
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tyraniak
Urban Legend
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-25-2008 23:56 |
IP: Logged |
A: He found it...in a volcanoQ: How did Hermes get his beurocrat license
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-26-2008 00:35 |
IP: Logged |
A: He requisitioned it at the Central Bureaucracy...by filling out & filing the 19 forms in triplicate & making sure they were stamped correctly in all 37 places.Q: How did Hermes end up at Planet Express?
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x.Bianca.x
Bending Unit
Since: Mar 2008
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posted 03-26-2008 01:45 |
IP: Logged |
A: And I come to the career chips story that has otherwise been lost. Or Hermes is evil and he wanted to take advantage of the proffessor and take over the company basically.Q: the dirtiest question ever: how the hell do robots have sex?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-26-2008 02:02 |
IP: Logged |
A: Any way they want; it's all about the CPU...Q: What other "interesting" things can robots do?
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ShepherdofShark
Bending Unit
Since: Feb 2008
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posted 03-26-2008 15:57 |
IP: Logged |
A: Kill all humans.Q: Why don't they?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-26-2008 18:44 |
IP: Logged |
A: Restraining bolt built into their CPU.Q: What other special restraining mechanisms are built into robot CPU's?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-26-2008 21:11 |
IP: Logged |
A: A program that makes them obey the 5 laws.Q: What are the other 2?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-26-2008 21:15 |
IP: Logged |
A: 4) It's illegal to not drink alcohol.
5) Whoring it up with Floozybots is encouraged.Q: Why were robots programmed with the 5 laws to begin with?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-26-2008 21:20 |
IP: Logged |
A: So they don't forget to recharge and score.Q: Who created the 5 laws?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-26-2008 21:38 |
IP: Logged |
A: The President of Earth, after the Robot Insurrection of 2168.Q: Why did the Robot Insurrection occur?
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Frisco17
Liquid Emperor
Since: Aug 2005
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posted 03-27-2008 19:58 |
IP: Logged |
A: Lug nut shortage.Q: What stopped it?
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seattlejohn01
Liquid Emperor
Since: May 2007
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posted 03-27-2008 20:16 |
IP: Logged |
A: The invention of the Lugnut-tron.Q: What other robots have stopped wars or conflicts?
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