Futurama   Planet Express Employee Lounge
The Futurama Message Board

Design and Support by Can't get enough Futurama
Help Search Futurama chat Login Register

PEEL - The Futurama Message Board    Melllvar's Erotic Friend Fiction    New fan-fic « previous next »
Author Topic: New fan-fic  (Read 449 times)
Pages: [1] Print

« on: 07-11-2004 23:57 »

Hello this is my first fan- fic because I am a newbie. Well here it goes... If you like it tell me if you think it sucks tell me some things I can improve on!!!

   (the planet express ship)
Leela: No it is past the exton air shop.
Professer: no it clearly marks we should be there by now.
Leela: let me take a look at that.
  (she mumbles on about how the boys should not take her for granted because she is a woman)
Fry: loooook out for that....... whatever that is.
            ( they wake up after they seemed to go threw the warp of time)
Leela: where are we?
Hermes: I don't know man where are we?
Fry: wait a secound... this looks like... no It can't be... it is old new york when it was new new york!
Bender: Good maybe we can freak out some old ladies and steal their money and dope.
Fry: no old lady has dope bender.
Bender: Ofcorse they can look at Amy's grandma!
Amy: Hey!
Leela: anyway this must be the spot.
Amy: But we are in the past how could it be?
Bender: how can you be such a loser?
Professer: Ok now.....nhaaaaaa......nhaaaaa aa....
Professer: Oh yes now let me take a look at the map.Oh yes...Yes I see. We can't let anyone know we are from the future.
Bender: ok........Muehahahaha
       (They are all walking down the street)
A little girl: EWWWWWW look at that lobster.
The mother: Don't look just keep walking.
Zoid berg: what I ummm.... work for redlobster...... as the sales man at the door....
Professer: well We are close now we need to turn here.
A teen on the street: AHHHH YOU HAVE ONE EYE!
Leela: Y it is like the.... new eye sergeri.....DHHHH.
       (the teen gets her cell phone and speed dials her plastic sergin)
Professer: Ahhhhh... here it is..... this is a Mr. Carl.
Leela: Carl? Just carl no last name?
Professer: Yes... just Carl.
                          Stay tuned for next episode and PLEASE post perdictions, opinions, what you would like to see, and what you disliked or liked about it!

        up yours   up yours    puke

Victory is mine! your puney little lifes are worth nothing to me!Bow before I beheadith you!

« Reply #1 on: 07-12-2004 17:00 »

Originally posted by Black_Rose:
         up yours    up yours     puke

Are those smileys really nessicary?

Starship Captain
« Reply #2 on: 07-12-2004 18:37 »

Originally posted by Y_L_B:
 Are those smileys really nessicary?

Was that post really necessary?  tongue

On topic, I'd like to know if the fan-fic was based on any of the episodes?

« Reply #3 on: 07-13-2004 11:36 »

Originally posted by victor2000:
 Was that post really necessary?   tongue

Oh, meh.

I suppose I should have added a review, but to tell you the truth, it was very hard to read.

I did end up grammer-fying it and reading it, though.

This looks like a pretty good beginning, but it kind of seems like RTEW, but in the 1990's instead of the 1950's. Oh, well. I look forward to reading the rest.  smile


Delivery Boy
« Reply #4 on: 07-13-2004 13:00 »

It's too disorganized, and it's moving to fast. And Bender's lines don't seem believable.

Not trying to hammer you or anything, just trying to help. :-)
Pages: [1] Print 
« previous next »
Jump to:  

Powered by SMF | SMF © 2006, Simple Machines | some icons from famfamfam
Legal Notice & Disclaimer: "Futurama" TM and copyright FOX, its related entities and the Curiosity Company. All rights reserved. Any reproduction, duplication or distribution of these materials in any form is expressly prohibited. As a fan site, this Futurama forum, its operators, and any content on the site relating to "Futurama" are not explicitely authorized by Fox or the Curiosity Company.
Page created in 0.067 seconds with 17 queries.