Futurama   Planet Express Employee Lounge
The Futurama Message Board

Design and Support by Can't get enough Futurama
Help Search Futurama chat Login Register

PEEL - The Futurama Message Board    Melllvar's Erotic Friend Fiction    Fan Fiction Raviews « previous next »
 Topic locked! 
Author Topic: Fan Fiction Raviews  (Read 10822 times)
Pages: 1 ... 4 5 6 [7] 8 9 10 ... 20 Print
Erdrik

Professor
*
« Reply #240 on: 08-07-2003 13:27 »

I just read parts 1-4 of Delicious Surprise.

Overall it's alright, though the fact that after 4 parts there is still no disernable plot really prevents me from liking it to much. Basicly it reads like a documentary of their lives. It starts out a little slow but picks up just a touch by the fourth part, with the Ash...

Every one acts pretty close to the way their suppose to, tho  hmpf the dialog needs a little improvement...

I'd give all 4 parts a 5.5/10.  smile
Lots of potential, keep it up.  wink

Call me Erdrik

Boycott Fox!! Down with the Evil OverLords!!
Allen

Professor
*
« Reply #241 on: 08-08-2003 23:58 »

Hi, I'm back with a review of some fics I've read.

Universe of Malice: Beautiful work on Part 13. I look forward to the next installment.

The Fry-borg: Sickingly sweet. Not much of a plot to this. I was disappointed as it had a lot of potential. Still good for a once over by any F&L shipper.


The end of a story is only the beginning.
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #242 on: 08-09-2003 01:14 »

I'm in agreement with Allen, the Fry-borg did have a lot of potential, with Leela jealous because of the way that Fry had become, a re-evaluation of their relationship, and then, it just seemed to speed up and dash to the ending, which while shippy, felt very...compressed, why not?  Enjoyable, but seeming to lack something overall.
Kif White

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #243 on: 08-09-2003 02:38 »

I recently read Anarchist's "A Second Chance" at TLZ, which isn't a new story, but here's a little review of it anyway:

It's a very good fanfic. Actually, it's better than good, it's great. It's funny, touching, gripping and just a really good read. There are some great lines, fantastic moments and the characterisation is dead-on. The conflict between Leela and Fry following is also well scribed and thought out, and I think the writer has really portrayed things between the two of them accurately. It may be a Shipper fic, but it's not pointlessly mushy (Bender's jerkass moments all the while contrast the deeper parts well) and is still open-ended regarding Fry and Leela's relationship.
Overall, it's got a little bit of everything. Action, adventure, romance, neat aliens, laughs, nightmares... you name it. I can see why it's one of the highest and most often rated stories at TLZ, it really does deserve it. A good story for both Shippers and fans of the series in general. Kudos to Anarchist, you did a great job.
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #244 on: 08-09-2003 12:24 »

i also read Fry-Borg and um..well..it's not bad but the wedding comes out of nowhere and Leela was wildly out of character. She really isn't as violent as some fics make her out to be. Especially towards her friends. She would never pick a physical fight with Fry. Not even out of pride. She's not an egotist shes just really really independent. It's really not the same thing.
Futurama_Hil

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #245 on: 08-09-2003 22:21 »

Err, I didn't like it that much. 
Erdrik

Professor
*
« Reply #246 on: 08-10-2003 14:13 »

I also didn't like Fry-Borg too much. Mostly for the same reasons Venus stated. Leela isn't so violent. The only times she gets violent is if she feels the person deserves it or in self defence. And the characters were indeed out of character.   hmpf

Call me Erdrik

Boycott Fox!! Down with the Evil OverLords!!
leelaholic

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #247 on: 08-10-2003 16:46 »

Anybody read "Flushin' in the wind? It's in Fan art and fiction in "my crap-tacular fan script"
Allen

Professor
*
« Reply #248 on: 08-12-2003 12:46 »
« Last Edit on: 08-12-2003 12:46 »

I'm here with a review of three fanfics.

The Scourge of Zapp Brannigan: This is the latest fic serial by Dwight Anderson. I felt pretty much disgusted with this story. It's SO obvious this is a steal from Ghostbusters II that he need not have said so in the fic. I say steal instead of parody because that's exactly what it is. The plot is so similar you can slap the original characters from the movie into the fic and have a detailed description of the freaking movie. Mind you parodies ARE supposed to be similar, but not spot on. Add to that that the characters sound weird and this fic leaves you moaning for it to stop.

Changed places: This is the first fic done by long time fan artist Lee Roberts. Lee has started what could be a good story, but is badly in need of a spell/grammer check. It prevents me from enjoying the story. The characters also sound weird. (Example: Fry: Why can't I get her to like me sexually. I am all male, it's not like I'm a freak! I got to try something!) and he explains as if he's not sure what's going on in his own story. I don't know if it's intentional or not.

A Birthday Suprise: This fic started out ok, if a bit weirdly, but has ended on stranger terms. I saw what the whole adventure was from the beginning and it would have been great if it had stopped there, but it continues to try and add a twist that made no sense at all in my mind. Good try though Hil. Can't wait to see your next attempt.

 


The end of a story is only the beginning.
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #249 on: 08-12-2003 15:31 »

Part 5 of Missy's Delicious Surprise is up at TLZ, and it's Leela and Fry's first date.  Actually, this was a well written chapter in my opinion, the story is progressing, there's no huge rush to get it done, and the story sounds nice.  It actually, in my mind, sort of sounds like what the alternate Fry and Leela from FPB's date may have went.  I'm looking forward to the next installment.
Erdrik

Professor
*
« Reply #250 on: 08-14-2003 13:22 »

Read part 5 of Missy's Delicious Surprise.

Its pretty good best chapter so far,...
Alhough the date went a little too smoothly, IMO...
I think Leela was out of charcter. From what I have seen she seems the type to let the other control the date.   hmpf

Also one bit in particular was so off it made me stop and re-read it a couple of times... really hurt the 'immersivness'(sp?) of the story  tongue

 
Quote
"Do you want to go to the Hip Joint?" she asked suddenly. "It's oldies night tonight, maybe they'll play something from your time."

He seemed nervous. "I dunno, Leela; it's getting kind of late..."

"Let me put it this way, Fry; I want to go to the Hip Joint with you."

His eyes lit up. "That changes everything."
I don't get why 'that changes everything'...
If she was asking to go in the first place then Fry would understand that she wants to go. Leela should have been a bit more covert or subtle in how she said it. like:
 
Quote
"I haven't danced in a while, I wonder if there is a club near by."
...
He seemed nervous. "I dunno, Leela; it's getting kind of late..."

"Let me put it this way, Fry; I want to go to the Hip Joint with you."

Still a 5.5\10...   smile

Call me Erdrik

Boycott Fox!! Down with the Evil OverLords!!
]PaulFSAC[

Professor
*
« Reply #251 on: 08-14-2003 14:06 »
« Last Edit on: 08-14-2003 14:06 »

Not read any fiction recently been two busy pondering over No Compromises Part 2 and how to deal with a certain section, while at the same time making a long awaited start on Minds Apart Part 3, which will take precendece for a little while.

Don't forget Andy (robbo1976@hotmail.com) would love to see your fics on FSAC, as it keeps him gainfully employed at the site     tongue
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #252 on: 08-18-2003 10:55 »
« Last Edit on: 08-18-2003 10:55 »

Part 6 of a Delicious Surprise is up at TLZ, and it's pretty good.  There's some violence in this part, but it is a developed part of the storyline, and reads very well.

Looking forward to part 7.  smile
helpimchoking

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #253 on: 08-18-2003 22:52 »

i wanna write a script, fry gets into  blizzard storm in the middle of no were, leela comes to rescue him but faints from the cold, and fry has alot more protective clothes, so he finds her and carries her throw extreme weather, and he put alot of his clothes on her, and he fights bears and gets hurt, and ya, i love dramam episodes, but n e waysz, leela is barely awake when she sees him about to collaspe and the crew finds him, in the express ship. oh ya. drama episodes.......... and then like they both awake in differnt rooms, and fry wants to see leela but he cannot, cuz he broke him legs, and leela broke her leg, oh boy. thay wud make me cry if they made  an episode like that, i asked anyone if thwey have seen the show and who ever said yes said they liked  it, who wouldnt tho? i luv the moon episode, and i wanna see the sting episode ok byez now
helpimchoking

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #254 on: 08-18-2003 22:57 »

hey ]PaulFSAC[ like ur icon/button
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #255 on: 08-18-2003 23:34 »

umm....what exactly was the point of that? This thread is to review fics that are already out. There is another thread for talking about fics you are writing, and just for future reference, if you tell the entire plot of a fic before you even write it it kinda takes away the point of reading it. Oh and periods are a good thing. There were 18 commas all withen 5 sentences.
Futurama_Hil

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #256 on: 08-19-2003 09:13 »

Yes, commas are your friends.

and so is the "edit" button.

Like Venus said, put that in "fan fiction release dates" if you're going to do write this fiction you speak of. 
Fing-longer

Crustacean
*
« Reply #257 on: 08-19-2003 10:44 »

I've been begging for responses in another thread, but I'll post my request for reviews of my script here as well. It's "All Rodents Lead to Home" and reveals how owls became dominant and how cows became extinct. It's very episode -like and is a quick read. Enjoy!
 http://www.leelazone.com.ar/fanfic/rodentsleadhome.shtml
Mango

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #258 on: 08-19-2003 11:03 »

I liked the rodents.  They made me smile.  Also the part with the rat burgers made me go "Ew!"  And stuff.  And that's my....uh, review.  Thingy.  Yeah.
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #259 on: 08-19-2003 15:31 »

I liked it. Seemed almost like a real script. Although I prefer prose rather than script when it comes to fanfics, everything flowed nicely and was pretty funny.

Uh, yeah, that's about it. I normally don't do reviews, so bear with me.
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #260 on: 08-26-2003 13:03 »

Part 7 of Delicious Surprise is up at TLZ, and it's a very good read.  For any shippers in here, you'll love it.  I like the way that this story is progressing, and am really looking forward to part 8.  I think that this, along with Universe of Malice, are currently my favorite ongoing fanfics.
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #261 on: 08-26-2003 17:28 »
« Last Edit on: 08-26-2003 17:28 »

Even though I don't consider myself a shipper, I too like how this fic is developing. It's wellpaced and the characters are pretty spot on. We've not even begun to look into what changed Leela and what she and Lilah can do to revert that, so it's looking to be quite a story once it's done. I'm looking forward to part 8 too. And I'll probably get to read before anyone else.  tongue
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #262 on: 08-27-2003 09:06 »

Universe of Malice 14 is up at TLZ now, and it's another excellent read.  After the excitement of the last chapter, it's a little slower, with some more development, but the ending leave you wanting more.  It really leaves you waiting for the next chapter.
Futurama_Hil

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #263 on: 08-27-2003 09:59 »

I just read chapter 14 of Universe Of Malice. I didn't like this chapter as much as some others, but it was still a great read.  I dunno, I don't like Alesia very much. Maybe because she gets in between Fry and Leela.  Still, she's a very intesting character and one of the best original fan fiction characters. I already want to read the next part.
SB

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #264 on: 08-27-2003 11:07 »
« Last Edit on: 08-27-2003 11:07 »

I read the first 8 installments on FanFiction.Net and can only find the rest on TLZ, which is a shame as a fic of this calibre should be on as many sites as possible, to maximize it's presence on the net.
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #265 on: 08-27-2003 20:01 »


i was starting to get to the point where i didn't mind Alesia so much anymore. That is until the end.
Futurama_Hil

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #266 on: 08-27-2003 20:46 »

I totally agree with you, Venus. I never did really mind her until those type of things occured.
Kif White

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #267 on: 08-27-2003 20:48 »
« Last Edit on: 08-27-2003 20:48 »

Actually..... (note: contains not only spoilers from Chapter 14, but minor details about upcoming chapters.)

Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #268 on: 08-27-2003 20:58 »

oh really? Yay! She may annoy me but i do agree that she is by far the most interesting original character. But if you put Fry with her instead of Leela.....i may have to do something that you would regret...(insert evil laugh here)
Futurama_Hil

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #269 on: 08-27-2003 21:09 »

I'm glad you wanted people to feel that way, becaus eII was afraid you may get me wrong and assume I hated her, which I don't. I just don't really like her when she does what Venus stated earlier.  But she is very compelling character with interesting emotions to figure out.
Mango

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #270 on: 08-27-2003 21:29 »

...yes.  If Fry ends up with Alesia, I'll have to kill you. With voodoo and bunny rabbits.  tongue
Luis

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #271 on: 09-02-2003 02:40 »

Hi everyone  smile

I'm Luis Gonzales (That guy that wrote the Fry-borg). First of all, i wanna state that like the name would suggest, i'm mexican and thereby english is not my native language so sorry for some stuff that didn't make sense on the fic. Secondly, i agree, my fanfic is not nearly as good as any of kritten's, bumblebee theta's, etc, and i'm amazed that they got like 5 or 7 votes on TLZ and mine got 40 (And i'm not being sarcastic, I LOVE their fics). Thirdly, I asked for feedback for the fanfic and only 3 or 4 people bothered enough to actually E-mail me(Allen and my friend Alexei being the most helpful). I know i screwed some things up on it but i don't think Leela is too violent, although i do recon that fighting Fry was a bit unrealistic (Okay, WAYY too unreal), just remember TMLH. Also, try to keep in mind that i'm a newbie, and the only way i could be a little original was to put some of my feelings on it (Part 5 will be a little better i hope). Anyway, to everyone that would PLEASE point me the mistakes in the story i'd be grateful (Like i said on the fic, fire at will) i can't improve without advice (Except from that ght guy).
nasteve

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #272 on: 09-02-2003 05:54 »

I finally managed to catch up with everyone else in Universe of Malice. I finished chapter 14 on friday. I would have posted then but PEEL died.

Anyway, first of all I think this story is really cool. The writing is pretty awesome it flows nicely and the descriptions are really cool. I like how the story has lots of action in it but still doesn't totally forget that it's futurama and the jokes are still there. Very much looking forward to continuing reading.

Only negatives I'll put up about the story are I thought it was a bit slow getting started. It took me a long time to get to chapter 14 and that's probably because I didn't really catch on with the first few chapters. But once I got to about chapter 6 the story really picked up for me and I found myself reading a chapter every night until I was finished. It really gripped me then and was so much fun to read.

I probably would have given every indivudual chapter a review if i'd read from the start but I'll just sum up so far. Very cool story, worth persevering despite its length. Also, it's been quite a while since I've read a fanfiction for futurama that really got my imagination going so, Kif White, well done!
Luis

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #273 on: 09-02-2003 19:17 »

I've just read Missy's measured and i thought it was excelent, but too short, and the idea of actually seeing a second scenario of a futurama ep is new to me.

I've also read Baker's metal tomb of terror and it was a bit like you all say my fic is. I kept getting my hopes up with some of the lines but something bothered me about the line that followed and the writter's note made me lost that "inmersion" feeling. Bad spelling was noticeable but as long as the general story is not affected i couln't care less. Also, i think Leela wouldn't accept her feelings for Fry that easily, but it's got potential.
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #274 on: 09-03-2003 22:42 »

I've just read Kryten's Catastrophe part 2 at FanFiction.net, and I've got to say, this is a nice read.  I'm definitely looking forward to part 3.  Go Amycat!
Kif White

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #275 on: 09-06-2003 02:07 »

Probably a little later than everybody else, but I just read part 1 of Missy's "Delicious Surprise" today. Here's a brief summary:

Overall, it's a nice start. I'm not generally into fics where Fry and Leela are together, but this is set so far down the line that that doesn't bother me. It seems realistic. Lilah seems very much like an offspring of Fry and Leela would be, and her character has been set nicely in such a short amount of time. Everybody is in character, and it's an interesting start to the story. It's not fantastically brilliant, or gut-busting hilarious, but it is very nice. Well-written and very much like Futurama. Keep up the good work, Missy.

P.S. If you're reading this, Missy, I've posted a larger review at the Groening Fanworks Central board too.
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #276 on: 09-08-2003 22:40 »

I just read part 8 of Missy's Delicious Surprise, and it's great.  I get more into this story with every chapter.  Looking forward to part 9.
Asylum-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #277 on: 09-09-2003 00:09 »

To Luis: I am, in order not to rip your fic off accidentally, asking this question in advance. Does, in The Fry-Borg, Fry become part-robot in any way? I'm starting a fic of my own, and I've read the first part of yours on TLZ, and I want to make sure the idea of my own fic is original.

You can put your answer in a spoiler thing if you don't want other people to know.
spacepilot3000

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #278 on: 09-09-2003 23:53 »
« Last Edit on: 09-09-2003 23:53 »

Hey eveybody. This is about my fan fiction, THE FRY-TRIX. Some people have been complaining that my fic is following too close to "The Matrix Reloaded". The fic is supposed to do that. If you haven't seen the flick yet. Go see it. Or wait for DVD. My fic does give stuff away like most of the key action scenes(except for the last fight between Fry and Smith in part 5. I made that one up.). But it's still a good read. If anyone has seen the film already and have read my fic. Your welcome to tell me about it here. Whether you liked it or not really liked it. I'll still be glad that you read it. The final part should be up at TLZ by thursday.
Luis

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #279 on: 09-10-2003 18:53 »
« Last Edit on: 09-10-2003 18:53 »

Asylum Fry, i don't mind accidental rip-offs, in fact, if it's accidental how can it be a rip-off? but anyway, no, he doesn't become a robot. He's enhanced with implants given to him by nibbler. Oh, and i just read the fics at TLZ again. I love the fics by all of those writters, the ones that didn't get enough votes (I mean their fics deserve like 60 votes!) you know the ones i'm talking about.
Pages: 1 ... 4 5 6 [7] 8 9 10 ... 20 Print 
 Topic locked! 
« previous next »
Jump to:  

Powered by SMF | SMF © 2006, Simple Machines | some icons from famfamfam
Legal Notice & Disclaimer: "Futurama" TM and copyright FOX, its related entities and the Curiosity Company. All rights reserved. Any reproduction, duplication or distribution of these materials in any form is expressly prohibited. As a fan site, this Futurama forum, its operators, and any content on the site relating to "Futurama" are not explicitely authorized by Fox or the Curiosity Company.
Page created in 0.169 seconds with 17 queries.