Internet Cheat (A trusty fic by AmZ Future)

[on:]

This is quite a F/L heavy fic  . To do with trust in relationships   some people trust  and some people don't   I hope I can trust people , if not I SHALL VAPORISE THEM, AND ZAP THEM INTO ITERNAL VANQUISH, I SHALL RULE!! I KILL THEM!!   Anyway on with the show I guess

Show spoiler

Just look out for any chatrooms

heh heh just kidding  

Internet Cheater

Part 1

Int: Planet Express-Conference Room 11:00am

Fry and Leela are sat making out, whilst Bender is sat drinking beer and puffing smoke in their face. The Professor enters. He stops.

Professor: (Pause) GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!!

Fry: Whoa whoa!

Fry and Leela pull away and Fry accidentally bites his tongue.

Leela: You ok Fry baby?

Fry: (Funny voice) I bi ma ton an I hur.

Leela: (Confused) Say what?

Fry: I bit my tongue and it hurts.

Leela: aaaaaaaaw

She kisses him.

Professor: anyway...moving on.

Bender: (Sarcastic)Yes...what crazy delivery...which may concern certain death are we going on now?

Prof: Oh my nothing like that. You see my Internet AOL is back on line!! Which means you can all use taday to go online...I guess you could call a sort of break.

Fry: You mean like...a day off?

Prof: Eh...something like that.

All: YES!!

Int: Planet Express-Hangar extension 12:30pm

Prof: Now, You'll see you have all the proper equipment as last time. Who wants to go online?

Everyone except Leela puts on the net suits.

Fry: Come on Leela...you goin online?

Leela: Nah, i'm gonna stay behind and catch up on some paper work, sleep and TV...

She brushes his hair back with her fingers.

Leela: But you have fun, ok?

Fry: (Disappointed) Ok.

Thats all for now...see more after FOX's short wipe on why I shouldn't be doing this.

[Reply #1 on:]

Interesting setup, is this inspired by episodes like A Bicyclops Built for Two?


You might want to include some kind of backstory for Fry and Leela apparently being in a relationship though, it feels a bit abrupt when they're kissing in the very first scene.

[Reply #2 on:]

It's a little jarring but if the reader can suspend disbelief with a futurama story, a fry-leela relationship will be no problem.  But I see Wonderpant's point, you might have Bender comment on noticing them making out like 'I liked it better Leela when you gagged at the thought of kissing Fry; the last two weeks have been a real drag of kissyface"--just a short nod that they are in a relationship and the timeframe.  Leave it with the one statement or pick up a short debate of the merits of their getting together with those present.

I'm not sure that' its in character for Bender to repond to the 'good news' other than with deep sarcasm.  You might have Amy or someone else pick up on that.  Fun start; you got my attention.

[Reply #3 on:]

Thanks for the advice I'll be update ing soon and yeah I was kinda gonna bring that in in the next bit as like a little break in the story to give them some background about Leela and Fry     about bender I kinda forgot to put sarcasm in brackets before he spoke about the news

[Reply #4 on:]

Awesome! Oh and heres something to make it even better: After Prof. Farnsworth says "GOOD NEWS EVERYONE!" have Bender throw his beer over the rail of the conference room, put a shattering sound, then put Zoidberg's voice yelling in pain!