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Author Topic: A Tad Frygetful  (Read 885 times)
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Urban Legend
« on: 08-17-2008 03:22 »

Well, the origin of this story was merely a brainwave, plus another brainwave that I'll write up after this one.
You could say this is one for the Fry/Leela shippers, but there are diiferent things in this story, so just read it and tell me what you think. The alternative name of this story was 'Forgetting Turanga Leela' after that movie, 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall', but I have never seen that movie so I stuck with this one.
I'll only be writing little bits at a time in chapters, so bare with me.

Chapter 1 Part 1

Fry, Leela and Bender were doing what they usually did at work, sit on the couch and watch TV.
"Good news everyone!" Proffessor Farnsworth said, walking into the room holding a box labelled 'Kidillious 9', "You have a package to deliver!"
Leela, the only one listening to what the proffessor had to say, grabbed the remote and turned off the TV.
"Where'd the moving pictures go?" Asked Fry, stupidly.
"We have a package to deliver, so get your lazy asses off the couch and c'mon!" exclaimed Leela, taking the box off the professor and throwing it at Fry.
"Leela!" The professor yelled, "you must be more careful with that! Kidillious 9 is constantly at war with Adultious 5, their neighbouring planet, so whatever's in that box is most likely a weapon of inconceivable doom!"
Leela stood up,"Don't worry proffesor, everything will be fine!" She lied. Whenever boxes of inconceivable doom mixed with Fry and Bender, something bad ALWAYS happened.
"Lets go!" said Leela, marching out of the room, Bender and Fry reluctantly following her.

One hour flying through space had passed. Bender was reading a Playbot magazine, and Leela was driving the ship. Fry walked over to Leela timidly.
"So....driving the ship? he asked.
Leela immediately knew the conversation was going to end with Fry attempting to pick her up. Every Friday he would ask her out, she always replied no, she didn't know why he constantly did it. Couldn't he see she wasn't interested.
"Fry..." Leela started.
"Yes?" said Fry, in a hopeful voice.
"We're here." Leela said bluntly, landing the ship on a patch of oddly coloured blue grass.
Fry walked over to Bender to grab the package.
"She rejected you again, didn't she?" asked Bender, contently.
"What!? How'd you know? You're way over here reading robot porno!" Exclaimed Fry.
Bender looked Fry right in the eye and said, "A mighty robot like myself knows these things, besides, rejection is written all over your face." Bender stood up and walked out of the ship, "You humans are so obvious." he muttered. 


Urban Legend
« Reply #1 on: 08-19-2008 02:45 »

Thanks for the support, I really appreciate it! The motivation only makes me want to work harder. So just because I got so much support, I'm gonna leave you in suspense after this part, because I have more written down, so enjoy (and to hell with chapter 1 part 2, its just chapter 2 now)!

Chapter 2

As the three stepped out of the ship and onto the blue grass, all they could see was the vast jungle, stretching out for miles.
"Oh, crap, this is going to invole walking, is'nt it?" enquired Bender.


They had been walking for ages, but there was no sign of life anywhere. The whole time Bender had been thinking about what was in the box. What kind of weapon was so dangerous they actually had to be "careful" with it? They had delivered heaps of death-rays, death lasers and death-powered, laser-rays before, and the proffessor hadn't cared if they blew up a planet with it, as long as they got the money.
Leela was walking up ahead, clearing some of the dense jungle with a sword, while Fry and Bender were dawdling along behind. Bender had a plan up his sleeve.

He slowed hi walking to a stop.
"What's the matter Bender?" Fry asked.
"Well..." Bender started, "We've been walking for hours and we haven't seen anything."
"So..." Bender continued, " What if this whole mission is a joke?"
"A joke?"
"Yes, a joke. What if there isn't anything in the box, a big hoax? So what if we just sneak a peak at--" Bender's hands moved closer to the box that Fry was holding, but Fry was to quick for him and moved away.
"No Bender!" said Fry, "Normally I'd wanna see what's in mysterious boxes and play around with whatever's inside for a while, but I don't want to screw this up! Maybe if I do a good job of this, Leela will see that I can be mature enough to be in a relationship...with her.."
Bender was getting jealous of Fry always talking about himself and Leela as a couple, a couple that didn't invole Bender! He looked up at Fry, gave him the robo-puppy eyes and said in a dissappointed tone of voice, " Fine Fry, I wont look in the box. I'll just curl up over there, behind the bushes and sober-up until I shutdown. But don't worry. As long as the box gets delivered.."
Fry couldn't help but feel sorry for the robot. He told him, "You're my best friend, Bender. But I'm not letting you open this box! When we get to the nearest bar, we'll drink till' the space cows come home, or until I pass out, either way. How does that sound?"
"Ok, I guess." grumbled Bender.
"That's the spirit!" exclaimed Fry, "Now, cum...on?"
Leela was nowhere to be seen. It was as if the jungle he had cut down, had almost instantly grown back. Fry and Bender were alone in the jungle of a strange planet with no food, no drink, and the only thing to keep them amused was the box.


Bending Unit
« Reply #2 on: 08-19-2008 04:39 »

Rule of thumb:  the more fanfic writers these days, the better.

Good start, good luck! (you might want to spell check before posting--(e.g. "invole" instead of "involve"--it's amazing how quickly people can get turned off because of little things like that)..

Delivery Boy
« Reply #3 on: 08-22-2008 23:04 »

Well you said no one has read yours, so I did.
It was pretty good. Better than I expected a fanfic to be. The writing was pretty smooth and for the most part didn't seem amateurish like I would expect finfics to be. There are a few occasions where that comes up but thatís going to happen to anyone who isn't a professional. The writing was also really quick. I really don't know if that's good or bad but you seem to go through the events pretty quickly.
Overall I'd agree with the guy above me. Good job

Urban Legend
« Reply #4 on: 09-10-2008 12:58 »

If anyone was actually reading this, im sorry its taking so long for the next part.
Ive got some of it done, but its the last 2 weeks of school term and my english teacher dumped writing homework on me, my science teacher dropped homework on me, and also SOSE, humanities and health. its less homework than in year 8 though, lol

Bending Unit
« Reply #5 on: 09-13-2008 14:57 »

That was cool. I can't wait for the next part.

Urban Legend
« Reply #6 on: 09-15-2008 13:26 »

Yesss, last week of term, i might write the next part tomorrow, for u americans, itl be today lol

Urban Legend
« Reply #7 on: 09-16-2008 08:45 »

Woo hoo, one more comment, woo hoo, i'm popular! flirt
I didn't get as much done as I wanted I was actually going to add more in but I thought it would go better with the next part of the story, but anyway, here it is, fresh and un-spell checked. evil laugh

Chapter 3

"Why me?" Thought Leela as she fiercely cut down the leaves and branches in front of her.
"There's plenty of other dumb bimbos that would get along fine with Fry. But maybe i'm being too hard on him. He may not be perfect but he is sweet. But do I really want to spend my whole life with a man that will enter a marbe-eating contest to win a dollar?" Leela wasn't paying attention to anything around her, just her thoughts, and the sword that was cutting down- a wall? The sword had hit a massive, 8 metre wall!
"Hello!" Leela yelled, "My friends and I have come to deliver a package!"
A big, booming voice roared from behind the gate, "Where is it?"
"Fry, show them the box!" said Leela, not turning around, to look at the empty space behind her. But there was no answer. She turned around finally.
"Oh crud!" she yelled
The sun was beating down on Fry and Bender.
"Food....Food.." Fry groaned.
"Beer....Beer.." Bender moaned.
Then they came to a sign. "Forbidden River" It read.
"A river, i'm saved!" Yelled Fry, he ran past the sign and towards the river. However, the water appeared to be a golden brown colour.
"Hmm....I wonder if it's safe to drink." Fry pondered, "Oh, what the heck." He stuck his hands in the river, and scooped heaps of the liquid into his mouth.
"Wait a minute, this isn't water!" he exclaimed, "It's beer!"
"Beer!?" Bender said excitidly, he then bombed into the river, sending beer in all directions- and onto the box, soaking it.
"Oh, no! The box!" Fry said, "Well, I better check if whatever is inside is ok."
He opened the box.

Urban Legend
« Reply #8 on: 09-17-2008 02:41 »

Woo hoo, one more comment, woo hoo, i'm popular! 

part of the reason not many people are replying could be that you're only posting little bits of the story at a time.  That's usually why stories get overlooked.  You might want to consider fleshing out your writing a little more, and maybe finding a beta reader.  Just a thought.

Urban Legend
« Reply #9 on: 09-23-2008 04:37 »

This is the last part of part 1 of  3 parts.
Ok, so im going to make a few changes:
First of all after this part, im going to make a new thread with all of part one posted together. I have ideas for other fanfics so the title wont be A Tad Frygetful.
Secondly im going to take soylentorange's comment and im going to have bigger sections of writing than i have written on this thread.
Thirdly dont bother posting after this seeing as I wont be reading or posting on here anymore, direct comments to my new thread.

Chapter 4

"Wait a minute, you're just kids!" Leela exclaimed, looking down at a group of Kidillions, the height and features of children, but with blue skin and a voice one would have thought would have come from a big, tall adult.
The Kidillions seemed annoyed with Leela's judgement, "We may look like children of your species, but we Kidillions know much more about the secrets of the universe than you could ever imagine."
"Well, those arguments aside", Leela started, "Are you going to help me find my friends or not?"
"Yes, of course", a Kidillion said, " We need to finnd them before something bad happens to our package."
Leela was suspicious. "What's in the package?" she asked.
The Kidillions gave her a stern look, Leela knew she was better off not asking.
Leela followed the Kidillions into a big, sophistocated building. The group walked past the receptionist who was buisily talking on the phone, and headed for a metal, high-security door. Beside the door was a hand-scan. The lead Kidillion got his hand scanned, and the door flew open. Behind the door arose a room with hundreds of monitors showing filmed images of areas of the planet- the town, the sky and the jungle.
"Wow! It's just like 'Big Brother'!" Leela exclaimed, "Why do you film everything?"
"Because of the recent attacks lead by our arch foes- the Adultrians, we must monitor every inch of our planet to ensure our safety." A Kidillion replied.
Suddenly, a nerdy-looking Kidillion ran up to the lead Kidillion and said, "Sir, there are intruders in the Forbidden River!"
The lead Kidillion looked at Leela.
"It's them all right." she replied bluntly.

Leela and the group of kidillions made their way through the jungle, the Kidilions apparantly knowing it inside-and-out. Suddenly, about 20 yards ahead, a bomb dropped and blew up some trees, the trees instantly groing back as if nothing had happened.
"We need to find the Earthicans and our package before the Adultrians' attacks' increase!" said the lead Kidillion.
The group started into a sprint, Leela amazed at how fast the Kidillions really were- faster than her. Lazers and bombs dropped from above, the Kidillions and Leela narrowly dodging them. They ran past the sign indicating 'The Forbidden River'. Then, out of nowhere, around 13 tall, muscular men with fins on the sides' of their arms' fell from the sky and started shooting at the Kidillions.
"It's the Adultrians!" The nerdy Kidillion screamed. The Kidillions were defenceless, but Leela still had her kung fu skills. She started kicking and punching the Adultrians, knocking 2 out in the progress, but there was too many. They were swarming all over her when suddenly, the Kidillions started fighting back with what looked like kung fu.
"How are you doing that?" Yelled Leela, still fighting.
"Our species can pick up things very quickly!" Replied the lead Kidillion, fighting with a smile on his face, "Go and find the box before it's too late, we will handle the Adultrians!"
"I'm on it!" yelled Leela, ditching the Adultrian she was fighting and running to where Fry and Bender were.

"Hmm, looks like a water gun." Fry said, holding a shabby-looking, supposedly-deadly weapon.
"And that was meant to be deadly how?" asked Bender, angrily.
"I don't know", replied Fry, "Maybe the Kidillions don't like water."
Bender was annoyed, "That's dumb, why the hell would we risk our lives for a super soaker?! Look, it doesn't even have a trigger, just a big red button. Stupid if you ask me!"
"Well, it seems to be fine, whatever it is, better put it back in the box." said Fry, kneeling over to put the gun back in the box.
Suddenly, explosions were happening and lazers were being shot in a variety of different directions. Fry stood back up, holding the gun, ready to fire.
Bender was not impressed, "Great, now we're gonna die, now i'll never know what Calculon dresses up as for halloween!"
Fry backed up near a clump of tall bushes...

Meanwhile, Leela was running, pushing leaves and branches in all directions. She thought she heard Bender, so she turned right and shoved more leaves out of the way. One of the branched she shoved out of the way seemed to be heavier, somehow. Then she heard a light 'thud', followed by an "Oh, no!" coming from Fry. He had dropped the gun. It was faced at him, and Leela came out of the bushes just in time to see that the gun had fallen on its' button and an eerie purple glow now surrounded Fry's head. He fell to the ground, unconscious.
"Fry!" Leela yelled, coming to Fry's aid. Explosions were everywhere, "He won't wake up!" Leela yelled, "We need to find out what the gun did to Fry!"
"No time!" Exclaimed Bender, picking up Fry and heading south.
Leela was confused, "How do you know the ship's there?" she asked.
"GPS." replied Bender.
Leela was annoyed, "Why didn't you use that when you and Fry got lost in the first place?!"
Bender was indifferent, "Meh."

The three rushed onto the ship, and Leela took off. She turned the auto-pilot on and joined Bender beside Fry.
"Hey, he's waking up!" exclaimed Bender.
Fry's eyes slowly opened, "Wh-wha? What happened? Where am I?"
Leela was relieved, "You got shot with a mysterious purple glow, you're on the ship now."
Fry looked very confused, "The ship? What's the ship? And by the way, who am I?"
Bender and Leela looked at each other, shocked.

Near Death Star Inhabitant
Urban Legend
« Reply #10 on: 05-02-2009 03:11 »

Holy hell, I had no idea Bianca wrote fanfiction. "I'll" be "sure" to "read" this "sometime".

Urban Legend
« Reply #11 on: 05-02-2009 09:15 »

Correction, I wrote part of a fanfiction. "I'll" have to "finish" it "sometime".
Future Shock

Liquid Emperor
« Reply #12 on: 05-02-2009 09:16 »

Which thread will be the new one Bianca?

Urban Legend
« Reply #13 on: 05-02-2009 09:19 »

actually, I think the new thread came to life and died ages ago somewhere. Either way, it was never finished.
Future Shock

Liquid Emperor
« Reply #14 on: 05-02-2009 09:21 »

This is the last part of part 1 of  3 parts.
Ok, so im going to make a few changes:
First of all after this part, im going to make a new thread with all of part one posted together. I have ideas for other fanfics so the title wont be A Tad Frygetful.
Secondly im going to take soylentorange's comment and im going to have bigger sections of writing than i have written on this thread.
Thirdly dont bother posting after this seeing as I wont be reading or posting on here anymore, direct comments to my new thread.

So this is still the thread? Then I can comment?

Urban Legend
« Reply #15 on: 05-02-2009 09:23 »

I don't care, but that first part was written in september, I could probably do better now.

Near Death Star Inhabitant
Urban Legend
« Reply #16 on: 05-02-2009 15:07 »

Stop hitting on Bianca, Future Shock.
Future Shock

Liquid Emperor
« Reply #17 on: 05-02-2009 15:21 »

Oh stop posting those clueless comments, Books.
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