Fry's Song-fanfic

[on:]

This is my first short fanfic so please be honest but gentle. Enjoy

Leela was sitting in a cafe/karaoke. It wasn't an ordenary karaoke bar though. You had to come up the songs yourself, and unless you wrote the music yourself, it was just you and your voice. But then agian that was why she liked it. That and the fact it was so busy no-one bothered her

Announcer> And now ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in two weeks, we have someone willing to sing for us.

To Leela's complete suprise, Fry walked on stage.

Fry> I'm dedicating this song to the woman I love, this is for you Leela.

Leela was stunned, Fry loved her, sure they had been going out together for a bit but this was the first time he'd said he loved her. And then he sung, he sung well, with a softness in his voice that she never knew was there.

Fry>
The first time I saw you,
I knew you were the one,
I didn't know to tell you,
I had to hold my tougue,

I know I'm not that smart,
But there's one thing that I know,
You will always have my heart,
I will always love you so,

Some people have hurt you,
And they have made you cry,
That is what I'll never do,
Insted I'd rather die,

Because the first time that I saw you,
I knew you were the one,
I didn't know to tell you,
I had to hold my tougue,

I tried and tried to tell you,
Just how much I care,
And no matter what you say or do,
I always will be there,

I always will love you,
I always try to please,
I will always be the person who,
Will try to put you at ease,
 
Because the first time that I saw you,
I knew you were the one,
I didn't know to tell you,
I had to hold my tougue,

So now you here me singing,
The one thing I can do,
I hope that you are thinking,
That you feel the way I do,

I don't know how you feel,
But I know the way I do,
I can't change the way I feel,
Nor the fact that I love you,

Because the first time that I saw you,
I knew you were the one,
I didn't know to tell you,
I had to hold my tougue.


Leela was shocked, as Fry got down from the stage to thunderous aplause and calls for encore. He made his way through the crowd towards her with people patting him on the back, he even got given some business cards.

Leela> I loved the song, and I love you.

Fry> Good because I meant every word. I really love you. I want to be there for you till I die.

Leela> I want you to be with me till we die too.

Suddenly Fry dropped down on one knee and pulled out a diamond ring, the cafe was silent.

Fry> You know I love you, I don't care if you only have one eye because in my eyes you are and always will be beautiful. I will never hurt you, I will always love and be there for you and I meant everything I said in the song. So Leela, will you make me the happiest man in the universe and marry me.

Leela> Yes, of course I will, I love you Fry.

Fry slipped the ring on Leela's ring and a cheer erupted from the crowd.

THE END
   


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Leela and Fry belong together, why can you people see it, goddamn you!!!!

[Reply #1 on:]

Wow that was really good!! It doesn't matter if it was short it was still great.

[Reply #2 on:]

Thank you, thank you, thank you, I feel less nervous now

[Reply #3 on:]

Hmm... Some grammar errors like "he got given some business cards" and stuff, and the end and some of the shippiness between the two was off some ,but for a short fic, and seeing as you wrote that song it's pretty good. Maybe kick the last sentence or elongate it some. It doesn't quite fit in somehow for me... Anyways, don't take the ranting too hard. It'll help you improve your writing in the long run.

[Reply #4 on:]

thanks for the advice, I think the last sentence was to lead on, but you're right that it doesn't fit.

[Reply #5 on:]

Soz about the double post, just letting you all know about my new fanfic, Love Will Set Me Free, its longer and better. I hope you'll all read it (please). Also, after you've read this story or my new one, please post and tell me what you think even if you don't like it, I'm always open to critisum, it helps me improve, plus it means I know you've read it and I'll stop feeling insecure.

[Reply #6 on:]

Too short, too trite, too shippy.  Sorry, didn't like it.

[Reply #7 on:]

Meaning no comment good, bad, or otherwise but, it's been done.

[Reply #8 on:]

oh well, maybe you'll all like my new one