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PEEL - The Futurama Message Board    General Futurama Forum Category    Melllvar's Erotic Friend Fiction    Yet another newbie posting fic.... (and maybe eventually some art) « previous next »
Author Topic: Yet another newbie posting fic.... (and maybe eventually some art)  (Read 10198 times)
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Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #160 on: 02-24-2006 11:02 »
« Last Edit on: 07-01-2006 00:00 »

Clarification: no, Fry's just remembering the voice from "The Why of Fry," without remembering where he's remembering it from.

I'll have to go back and make that clearer....

Exit Shiny, pondering
 
[Edit]some months later... July 06, actually...
I've gone ahead and reworked the paragraphs with Fry remembering Nibbler's voice. 

Anyone who's reading this: Is it clearer, now, that Fry is just picking up a loose fragment from his otherwise-blanked memory of WoF?  Lemme know....[/Edit]

~~~~~

Enter Shiny again, with TOTPD!



Exit Shiny, again
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #161 on: 02-24-2006 16:52 »

Oh! Ok... I think I read it too fast this morning.
Thanks for the info Shiny.
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #162 on: 03-10-2006 19:16 »

Sorry, no update yet...just the news that I'm online-ly challenged at the moment, and I won't be around till the crashed drive is fixed.  Wish me money and free time so it happens faster.  ;)


To make up for the lack of update, here's a silly little limerick...


A fanboy named Philip J. Fry
Got frozen like Boston cream pie.
It wasn't just fate,
But we had to wait
Three seasons until we knew why.


See you round soon, I hope...
Shiny  :)
NIC2001

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #163 on: 03-10-2006 23:32 »

Nice....

Come back to us soon Shiny!
Good luck with the money part.
PCC Fred

Space Pope
****
« Reply #164 on: 04-04-2006 20:34 »

There once was a PEELer called Fred
All of Shiny's fanfics he read
He thought they were great
Absolutely first rate
"Gold star for Shiny!" he said.
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #165 on: 05-28-2006 07:29 »
« Last Edit on: 08-25-2008 00:07 »

Ahh, so this is what everybody's been talking about! I've been left in the dark while everyone rushes over here! This is what we've been waiting for an update for! Well, I must say I agree, this is great. It's even better than mine! (Bangs head with large cast iron fry pan for being so arrogant)

Since you're a aspiring writer, as am I to some extent, let me give you some pointers. However, please keep in mind that these are merely suggestions from personal experience, and may not apply to you or to any other rational person in this world.

 
Quote
From Tounge Luck's fanfic 'How to Write a Shippy Futurama Fanfic':

Sometimes he [Fry] suffers from the sort of deep depression that can only be fully comprehended by teenagers with raccoon eyeliner and Winamp playlists that're two-thirds Dashboard Confessional. You should take this route if you want your fic deemed "meaningful".

There is actually a lot of truth in this, not only for 'Futurama' fanfics, but for all writing in general. To quote the author James Blish: "Who does it hurt? That's who the story is about." Sure, that seems obvious, but think about it. James Blish right there has reduced the core of storytelling to a single question. Everything that there is to be learned about characterization and plotting can be derived from that single insight.
 
Who does it hurt? That's who the story is about.

You've done a very good job of 'hurting' both Fry and Leela in a way that the reader can actually partially share. The reader in your story here can actually feel the pain each of the characters is going through, which to me seems to be the main point of telling a story. Now that the reader can actually understand the pain of the characters, the resolution of the story is going to be just as gratifying for them as it is for the characters. Very good writing here, very good. I know I almost cried when Leela yelled at Fry.

David Gerrold, teaches (or did teach) screenwriting at Pepperdine University for good while. at least eight of weeks of his sixteen week class are devoted to that single question. I personally take this advice, and whenever I sit down to do any fictional writing of any sort, I tape a virtual sticky note on my monitor.

And the humor! That part with Fry not being able to pick up a hint? Pure tribute to Douglas Adams. Loved it. (I'd say 'I'm Lovin' It', but you know, trademark infringment)

So now that I know what everyone's talking about:
I hope you won't think it evil of me to axe when there'll be another update?

(I'd include a little limerick here, but I'll hold off until the update. You know, incentive)

Signing my post today, no particular reason...
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #166 on: 05-28-2006 10:16 »

James Blish?  David Gerrold?

My God, you are a Trek geek of the highest order.

Anyway, you're right - Ms. Shiny did a good job with her story of the heartache that Fry felt when Leela yelled at him.  But also, you can feel the anger Leela feels at her antagonist and at herself as she realizes that Fry is paying for one her mistakes...

As for Fry not picking up a hint - well, he's a guy.  Guys (like me) don't do well with hints unless they're pounded into our skulls...
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #167 on: 05-28-2006 10:23 »
« Last Edit on: 08-25-2008 00:08 »

Well, James Blish and David Gerrold didn't just do 'Star Trek'. They also were regular science fiction writers. Their most well-known work is just in 'Star Trek'.

Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #168 on: 05-28-2006 17:36 »
« Last Edit on: 07-01-2006 00:00 »

As for a possible update - I made a post on the Fanfic Release thread to that effect.

And thank you!  I appreciate your insight.        :)

I actually read the "Who does it hurt?" thing from Orson Scott Card - either he learned it from Blish, or came up with it independently, I forget - in his very much excellent book Characters and Viewpoint[/b].  Even though I haven't liked his later fic as much as his earlier stuff, C&V still rocks - it's one of my half dozen "Most Useful Books On Writing," in fact. 

Edit: I wanted to add, Tongue Luck's scathing satire wasn't on pain in fiction, but on badly characterized pain in fan fiction - in "by the numbers generic romance"  Fry/Leela stories in particular.  I'm too lazy to link to it right now, but just read TL's story, (It's up at TLZ/Futurama Madhouse, and the original thread is somewhere in this very forum) (Edit again: I lied, I'm apparently not too lazy, here it is) to see what she was talking about (and laugh your shiny metal ass off).        :laff:

~~~~~

And Ralphie was just greeting a fellow tribe member - he's one of the original ST fans himself.  My lineage isn't quite that old, but I had a major Trekkie phase way before Next Gen was a spark in Gene Roddenberry's pocketbook.  So don't worry - no one's dissing Trek geekism here!        :D
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #169 on: 05-29-2006 03:33 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Shiny:

And Ralphie was just greeting a fellow tribe member - he's one of the original ST fans himself.  My lineage isn't quite that old, but I had a major Trekkie phase way before Next Gen was a spark in Gene Roddenberry's pocketbook.  So don't worry - no one's dissing Trek geekism here!       :D

Absolutely correct.  I only call the best and brightest 'Trek Geeks'.

I can promise that 95% of the members of this board don't have any idea who James Blish was.  Maybe 30-40% will know who David Gerrold is.

Any Trek geek who knows both these men is in my league of geekdom (whether or not that's a good thing is open for debate).

Tongue Luck's "how To Write A Futurama Story' is so true - just take a look at some of the stories on fanfiction.net.  Reading some of these 'stories' made my  eyes bleed and brain hurt...

I went to the only Trek convention ever held in atlanta wayyyy back in 1978.  Shatner was coming off of a failed series called 'Barbary Coast' and was his normal hammy self; Nimoy was aloof from the crowd and as obnoxious as ever (I cheered when Spock got cooked in TWOK); Doohan, Takai and Koenig spent hours talking to the fans. Nichols wasn't at this convention and I missed De Kelley (he was at the Friday night start but had a personal emergency that made him leave early Saturday).

At that point, Shatner was telling everybody about the new Star Trek TV series coming out (which Paramount changed to ST:TMP) and that even though Nimoy was making noises about not being involved, Nimoy needed a paycheck and he would play Spock until his dying day.  (Shatner was right).

Now, that story probably makes me the epitome of the Trek-Geek of this board...

El-Man

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #170 on: 05-29-2006 04:51 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ralph Snart:Maybe 30-40% will know who David Gerrold is.

I met him back in - heck, when was it - early 90's, I think. We got him over for an SF convention, just after the release of ST:TNG - him and Tracey Torme, one of the writers.

He told his 'quality of mercy' joke. Was all right though, we got him back with Vegemite...   :D
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #171 on: 05-29-2006 06:41 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ralph Snart:I went to the only Trek convention ever held in atlanta wayyyy back in 1978. 

Huh?  That can't be right - do you mean the first Trek convention ever held in Atlanta (GA, I'm assuming)?

Because I went a simply enormous con (the biggest I ever attended, and the only one out of Texas I ever got to) called DixieTrek in Atlanta GA way back when.  10,000 people were there - it kinda blew my mind.

Now, it did have guests from Star Wars, Doctor Who, Blake's 7, etc. as well as Trek; it even had some literary SF authors, maybe you were counting it as a multi-media con rather than Trek.  Still, it was called DixieTrek, and I'd thought that would count...hmmmm.

Anyway, just wondering.
Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #172 on: 05-29-2006 09:12 »

@ El-Man:

I've never met any of my favorite sci-fi writers; I have had the luck of meeting several UFOlogists - Stanton Friedman, Linda Mouton-Howe and Bob Lazar.  Then there's my favortie NRA co-members - Porsche Lynn and G. Gordon Liddy.

I guess that I'm in my own league of geekdom...

@ Shiny:

As far as I know, the 1978 Trek Convention is the only Trek-only convention ever held in Atlanta.  We had over 10,000 people show up - they were expecting 2,000 at most.  Thankfully I was living in Marietta at the time, so I didn't have to worry about sleeping arrangements.

Dragoncon is held yearly in Atlanta now, but that covers all facets of sci-fi - Star Trek, Star Wars, Lost In Space, Comic Books and probably Futurama.

I hope to make it to Dragoncon next year...
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #173 on: 05-29-2006 09:53 »

@Shiny: About Tounge Luck's fic. I know what it's about, I've read it. I think it's pretty funny, but I was just including the quote as a sort of comic relief. (As a joke! Why am I always misunderstood?!?  ;) )

@Ralph: I live in Smyrna, and I can assure you that there has been no Trekfest here since then.

Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #174 on: 05-30-2006 20:43 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Xanfor:

@Ralph: I live in Smyrna, and I can assure you that there has been no Trekfest here since then.

If you mean Smyrna, Georgia, I know exactly where it is - outside of Marietta in Cobb County.  Way back int he 70's the smog and polution of Atlanta would overwhelm Smyrna if the wind was blowing just right...

BTW, the Cobb County Civic Center was my very favorite venue to wrestle - good people, always had a good turnout and I lived 20 minutes away.  Does it still exist?

So, have you made it to a Dragoncon yet?  It seems like the type of event that would draw geeks like us like flies to a very sexy pile of manure...

Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #175 on: 05-30-2006 21:43 »
« Last Edit on: 10-14-2006 00:00 »

The Cobb County Civic Center still exists. I've been there several times. They've jazzed it up a little too. Sometimes they have computer shows.
The smog still exists as well.   ;)

Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #176 on: 06-28-2006 13:16 »

Eh-hem.
(Perpares to do something extraordinary)
(Pause...)
*BUMP*
Ta-da!
(Small drumroll while everyone throws Xanfor gifts)

I just got to reading yours again, Shiny, and something struck me that I didn't quite understand. At first I thought it was something you wrote, but then I realized that a fly had buzzed right into my forehead. So then I started reading again, and I realized that something had hit me just before the fly did, causing a brief period of hittingunawaradness. So, after several sessions of therapy later, I remembered. I wanted to point out to you that when Leela is yelling at Fry in the big yelling scene, she mentions that Alkazar was 'at least good in bed'. But Leela has never slept with Fry during any period of which she still has her memory. And it seems out-of-character for Leela to indiscriminately insult someone like that. Or, it could be extreme in-characterness combined with exquisite writing, showing how Leela is so sad and angry that she wasn't paying attention to what she was saying.

Just some thoughts that came to me... Drifting in the wind... Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go. I just spilled some liquid stuff of some sort onto some of my music sheets and now I have to try and shift 'The Flight of the Bumblebee' into key 'BZZZZ'.

Arkan

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #177 on: 06-28-2006 18:24 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Xanfor:
I wanted to point out to you that when Leela is yelling at Fry in the big yelling scene, she mentions that Alkazar was 'at least good in bed'. But Leela has never slept with Fry during any period of which she still has her memory. And it seems out-of-character for Leela to indiscriminately insult someone like that. Or, it could be extreme in-characterness combined with exquisite writing, showing how Leela is so sad and angry that she wasn't paying attention to what she was saying.

Did you finish rereading it? 'Cause there's a very reasonable explanation for that.  :)

And by the way Shiny, while I'm at it; something I noticed ages ago but kept forgetting about:

 
Quote
It was cool and damp; he wished he hadn’t left his jacket in the maintenance room.

 
Quote
From the bridge of the Planet Express Ship, the purple-haired figure watched Fry run across the clearing; the green, dark woods swallowed his orange hair and red jacket as if they had never been.

 
Quote
Fry ran, the pine-like needles scratching his bare arms

 
Quote
Fry shivered, cold in just his t-shirt.

Does Fry have his jacket on or not?  :confused:

OK, OK, it doesn't matter at all...I just like to be clear. I mean, how can I accurately picture the scene when I don't know how the characters are dressed:p
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #178 on: 06-29-2006 01:27 »

Xanfor: listen to Arkan.  Leela is...er...not herself there.

Arkan: I spotted that a couple months ago and just about died...I changed it to "orange hair and white T-shirt" in the version on my hard drive, but I wondered if it would be "cheating" to go and fix the one in the thread, and waffled until I ended up not doing it.  Should I go fix it?  Oh, there's probably not much point now.  Should I?

Shiny "Here I Go A Waffle-ing" J. Fangirl
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #179 on: 06-29-2006 01:33 »

Change it. You never know when you get new readers. I've made changes to my posted draft and been glad for it when new readers turned up.
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #180 on: 06-29-2006 01:42 »
« Last Edit on: 06-29-2006 01:42 »

Okily-dokily...

...done. 

I'm just trying to keep myself from (as mentioned in another thread, or did I just think about mentioning it and not actually do it?) getting distracted from new writing by the irresistible urge to polish the first bits to kingdom come. I guess I overdid it.

But thanks, Venus, and Arkan! 

(And I'll let you in on it...I've actually written a bit lately.  knocks fabricated imitation wood   :) )
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #181 on: 06-29-2006 06:39 »
« Last Edit on: 08-25-2008 00:05 »

Oh... Yeah, I messed up. :(

Sorry.
Tastes Like Fry

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #182 on: 09-04-2006 01:08 »
« Last Edit on: 09-04-2006 01:08 »

Have you left this story for dead?   :(

Shiny, may I ask you something? :blush: You wrote that story from the other side of the Sting yeah? (if not tell me who!) I read it ages ago (before I was a PEEL member) and it really inspired me to make my own, and it's very different and I don't want to make out like I copied yours and nor do I want to be 'better' at it. But I'd like to post it in my own said thread and get feedback and such. Plebe?

You can say no if you don't want me too.

EDIT: *headdesk* Thanks Space Case. I'll have to axe Venus then.
SpaceCase

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #183 on: 09-04-2006 04:40 »
« Last Edit on: 09-04-2006 04:40 »

   
Quote
Originally posted by Tastes Like Fry:
Shiny, may I ask you something? :blush: You wrote that story from the other side of the Sting yeah? (if not tell me who!) I read it ages ago (before I was a PEEL member) and it really inspired me to make my own, and it's very different and I don't want to make out like I copied yours and nor do I want to be 'better' at it. But I'd like to post it in my own said thread and get feedback and such.
If I may poke my nose in here:

Actually, Venus wrote the the story you refer to, called "16 Days," and you may find it here.

Shiny has written "A Thousand Summers," "The Other Side of Parasites," "Something to Live For," and another having to do with a vengeful character from the shows past abducting Fry. Sadly, I don't know the title of this last one, nor do I have links handy for any of them.    :(

Good reads, every one!   :love:

[EDIT:]

>.<
D'oh!

The reason I don't have the links to Shiny's aforementioned stories is that they're in the previous pages of this very thread!
Right under my *&^%$#@! nose!
  :rolleyes:
Salvertoruis

Crustacean
*
« Reply #184 on: 09-05-2006 04:55 »

Thats a good username Shiny, coz i like the way Zap says it in benders top ten list thing.. Shiny hehe.
KitKatBar-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #185 on: 09-05-2006 17:33 »

Hmm..., eh..., well...I'm just gonna put this in the nicest way I can. Don't get all jumpy or anything, because this is just my opinion. Personally, I'd only say that this fanfic was..
FREAKIN' FANTABULOUS!
Have you given up on this story? You have a whole new legion of supporters right here, and I'd really like you to try and finish this fic.
I love it!  :love:
Futurama Llama

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #186 on: 09-05-2006 20:49 »

I stand by everyone else who supports Shiny. You are right, kitkat.
I have two words for you:
Awesome.

How do you like a taste of your own medicine?

I read those fanfics above, and they ARE fantabulous.
KitKatBar-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #187 on: 09-05-2006 21:02 »

Yes they are. That's why you,Shiny, should really come back. We all support you all the way. Fantabulousisness to the max.
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #188 on: 09-06-2006 12:40 »

Ditto to the above, all I can add is: WE WANT SHINY BACK, SHINY COME BACK PLEASE, WE NEED YOU.
With that little demonstration done I'll return to my hidi-hole to wait for the Shiny-one.
Cyberphobia

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #189 on: 10-14-2006 09:24 »

Err... Shiny are you gonna continue this story? *begs*

Please, please, please do! I love it!
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #190 on: 10-14-2006 11:06 »

Yeah man! Don't hold out on us like this!
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #191 on: 10-14-2006 16:50 »

 
Quote
Guess who posted the following!
Anyone who's reading this: Is it clearer, now, that Fry is just picking up a loose fragment from his otherwise-blanked memory of WoF? Lemme know....

Yes. Very good. Of course, a story is no good at all unless it's completed. So I suggest you work on the bigger problem...

Naa, you're all right. We just love ya, you know?...  ;)

jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #192 on: 10-18-2006 16:14 »

SHINY COME BACK PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE

*falls to knees* WE need this story like I need my shippy fix!

Begging make me feel small but if it works...
SpaceCase

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #193 on: 10-19-2006 13:08 »

    Quote
    Originally posted by jle1993:
    SHINY COME BACK PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE

    *falls to knees* WE need this story like I need my shippy fix!

    Begging make me feel small but if it works...
    • It is good, innit?  ;)
    • Please don’t grovel, it’s degrading.  :(
    • Creativity is one thing that can not be rushed!
      Trust me, I know from sad experience!
    • To steal borrow a line from Robert Heinlein; The Muse is a Harsh Mistress."  :D
    Writer unit32

    Professor
    *
    « Reply #194 on: 10-21-2006 10:49 »
    « Last Edit on: 10-21-2006 10:49 »

    Shiny,how about THREE MONTHS of Shiny fafles
    for you to come back?Please Shiny this is the last place for me to turn to,all my favourite fan-fic writers have stoped   :(    :cry:
    SpaceCase

    Liquid Emperor
    **
    « Reply #195 on: 10-21-2006 13:25 »

     
    Quote
    Originally posted by Writer unit32:
    Shiny,how about THREE MONTHS of Shiny fafles
    for you to come back?Please Shiny this is the last place for me to turn to,all my favourite fan-fic writers have stoped   :(   :cry:
    Shiny's fic's.
    Layla50's fic.
    Soylent Orange's fic.
    PCC Fred's fic.
    Kryten's fic's.

    And my personal favorite, Dave Vincent's "Backrgound Noise."*

    Go nuts.

    *Meaning no slight to any other fic-writers who might be reading this.
    Bendersucksfry

    Bending Unit
    ***
    « Reply #196 on: 10-23-2006 20:15 »

    wow
    Shiny

    Professor
    *
    « Reply #197 on: 10-24-2006 02:49 »

    Wow! I had all this feedback and never knew! 

    Seriously...I've dipped briefly into the Fanfic thread every now and then, but never noticed my thread on page one till today.  I'm sorry I missed it.  No offense intended, Xanfor, everybody; I honestly didn't know anyone was posting here.

    D'oh! >.<

    But it is truly a pleasant surprise to discover it now.  Thank you, everybody!

    And yes, I DO intend to continue this story...I've actually written quite a bit, but for later in the timeline...I am unfortunately stuck on the section immediately following the last one posted.  (It always happens to me at about this point in the structure...I call it the "Act II Blues."  :rolleyes: )

    And I mentioned the name at some point...but to save you the trouble of searching, it's entitled "Beneath the Surface."

    And I'm doing all I can to coax the rest of it loose from my subconscious. Space Case is unfortunately right, it can't be forced (believe me, I've TRIED... ).  But I'm reasonably sure it's in there, I just have to get it out.  While you're waiting, do read the stories SC has linked to.  Also

    Venus's story, and
    Xanfor's fic

    And thank you everyone for such a great surprise!  :D
    Cyberphobia

    Bending Unit
    ***
    « Reply #198 on: 10-24-2006 05:49 »

    Yay! *waits patiently for more*
    Cyberphobia

    Bending Unit
    ***
    « Reply #199 on: 09-24-2007 08:10 »

    I think I have been reasonably patient... haha!

    So does Shiny still visit these forums?
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