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Author Topic: the great simpsons quote thread..  (Read 5466 times)
Pages: 1 ... 5 6 7 [8] 9 Print
DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #280 on: 03-10-2002 13:41 »

"You couldn't fool your mother on the foolin'est day of the year with an electrified foolin' machine."

Homer: But, Marge, I was a political prisoner.
Marge: How were you a political prisoner?
Homer: I kicked a giant mouse in the butt!  Do I have to draw you a diagram?
diagnostic

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #281 on: 03-10-2002 17:36 »

"When you go to hell, tell em itchy sent ya!"
Just Chris

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #282 on: 03-10-2002 23:51 »

(someone does tax calculations on Frink's back)
"Um, I felt that! You didn't carry the one! Now you'll have to face the horrible pain with the debts and the audits..."
LethalWeapon

Crustacean
*
« Reply #283 on: 03-22-2002 20:10 »

"Let us celebrate this grand ocassion with the adding of chocolate to milk."
 -Homer Jay Simpson  big grin
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #284 on: 03-23-2002 19:59 »

"And that's why today, bananas are called 'yellow fatty beans.'"
MuscaDomestica

Professor
*
« Reply #285 on: 03-24-2002 10:42 »

Barney (as Bacchus): You've changed. What happened to the old Zues that used to turn into a cow and pick up chicks.

Bart: How can a play where everyone dies be so boring

"Danes do it Melancholy" poster and Feudalism pennant in Bart (Hamlets) room

Lisa (Joan of Arc): God Spoke to me I must obey!
Bart (hands over mouth): Joan give me your dessert!
Lisa: That’s just you Bart
God: Joan give me your dessert!
(the éclair floats to heaven)
dschomburg

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #286 on: 03-26-2002 23:18 »

"I sleep in a drawer!"

"You see epidermis means your hair, so technically it's true. pardon me a momement...HA HA!"
"Uh..Nelson, I think he broke his leg"
"I said, ha ha"
BendingUnit1141

Professor
*
« Reply #287 on: 05-14-2003 02:42 »

bump!

Marge: Homer, there's someone here who thinks he can help you. 
Homer: Batman?! 
Marge: No, it's a scientist. 
Homer: Batman's a scientist.. 
Marge: It's not Batman!

Homer: Oh baby, we've got him now! There's no escape from the airport..
ImAPirate

Crustacean
*
« Reply #288 on: 05-14-2003 07:10 »

Red the Trucker: Trust me, this one's not for greenhorns.
Homer: Who's a greenhorn?! What's a greenhorn?!
Bart: It's an insult Dad! Sock him, sock everybody!

Homer: (Sitting at the dinner table in Mr. Burns' house) LOOK HOW LOUD I HAVE TO YELL!!

Homer: Shut up, netface.
Lenny: Hey, you're in the net too.
Homer: I said shut UP, netface.

Flanders: I haven't been this excited since we stole the 2000 election!
Homer: Don't blame me, I voted for the green M&M.

Homer: I'm.....going outside to....stalk.....Lenny and Karl....heh heh heh...d'oh!

Moe: Those pants cost $600?
Homer: Uh huh, they're Italian.
Moe: (pumping shotgun) Hand 'em over!
Homer: Moe, what the...?
Moe: Yeah, I rob now.
sheep555

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #289 on: 05-14-2003 08:00 »

And if this one hasn't been posted here before...

Poochie: And remember kids, recycle...TO THE EXTREME!!!
evan

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #290 on: 05-14-2003 23:14 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by BendingUnit1141:
Marge: Homer, there's someone here who thinks he can help you. 
Homer: Batman?! 
Marge: No, it's a scientist. 
Homer: Batman's a scientist.. 
Marge: It's not Batman!

Homer: "I'm not a religious man, but if you're up there...save me, Superman!"
BendingUnit1141

Professor
*
« Reply #291 on: 05-18-2003 03:27 »

Optometrist: Now read the first line.
Homer: I 8 P P... Why you little!
~FazeShift~

Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #292 on: 05-18-2003 19:29 »

*while walking past the door covered in tar and feathers*
Grandpa Gonna be in the tub for a while...
slimeball876

Crustacean
*
« Reply #293 on: 05-30-2003 15:07 »

Cool. I'm glad I found this thread...
As you can see I love the well thought out old episodes. big grin

Homer: "Hey,he lied to us through song! I hate when people do that!"

Crowd of people: Monorail! Monorail! Monorail!  Monorail!!
Homer: Mono-- D'oh!

Homer: The Kwik-E-Mart is real-- Do'h!

Mack Parker: Troy, Mack Parker. Ever hear of Planet of the Apes?
Troy McClure: Eh, The movie or the planet? 
asianlightning

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #294 on: 05-30-2003 15:20 »

Speaking of Simpsons quotes, I just suddenly realized where the horrible little quip "meh" came from...took me long enough.
sheep555

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #295 on: 05-30-2003 17:29 »
« Last Edit on: 05-30-2003 17:29 »

In my opinion, the funniest Simpsons quote ever (and I mean ever):

Homer: [trying to disguise his voice] Hello, my name is Mr. Burns.  I believe you have a letter for me.
Postal Clerk: Okay, Mr. Burns, uh, what's your first name?
Homer: [brief pause] I don't know.

That cracks me up every time....    smile
Just Chris

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #296 on: 05-30-2003 21:25 »

Skinner: (at his watch) "And that's exactly one moment..."

Gil: "No, not my hot plate! I had two more payments left!"
mikey

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #297 on: 05-31-2003 03:42 »
« Last Edit on: 06-02-2003 00:00 »

This is when marge rescues homer from the burning oil well.
Lenny: I guess no one is here to save me
Carl (from a helicopter): Dont you say that just yet.
AClosetFan

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #298 on: 06-15-2003 19:51 »

Ralph: Mommy can you open my milk?
Mrs. Hoover: I'm not your mommy ralph...

another ralph one:

Ralph: Hi Supernintendo Chalmers! I'm learnging!
dr_Dean_in _Oz

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #299 on: 06-16-2003 06:07 »

i dont know or care if these have been posted yet:

Ralph: I found a moon rock in my nose!

Homer: Oh Marge if theres an accident at the plant we just blame it on that foreign guy. Ah Uli how many times have you saved my white ass?
mikey

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #300 on: 06-16-2003 06:15 »
« Last Edit on: 06-16-2003 06:15 »

Snooze machine made by artie: travelled the world and the seven seas, I am watching you through a camera.
Australian Guy

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #301 on: 06-16-2003 06:23 »

[Homer]OH yeah? Bart come 'ere a minute[h]
[Bart]You come 'ere a minute
dr_Dean_in _Oz

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #302 on: 06-16-2003 07:20 »

mikey: i can really tell you watched the simpsons on fox8 last night but i dont know why.....?
Australian Guy

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #303 on: 06-16-2003 07:27 »

I saw that too
asianlightning

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #304 on: 06-16-2003 14:06 »

"Le grenouille mange le pamplemousse..."
Oompa Loompa

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #305 on: 06-16-2003 14:22 »

 
Quote
Marge:But Homer Running an Bar is an Part time job..You Don't even do your Part time job
Homer:So?In passion I shall do it
*He Moves an Box away to show an Half made Robot of of Junk*
Robot:Father!!!Build me Legs Father"!

  big grin   big grin   big grin HAHAHHA, so funny! This was one of the funnier jokes from last season!
Otis P Jivefunk

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #306 on: 06-16-2003 14:46 »
« Last Edit on: 06-16-2003 14:46 »

Here's an old one, but a classic. It's Homer's three little sentances that will get you through life:

Number One: "Cover for me"

Number Two: "Oh, good idea, boss"

Number Three: "It was like that when I got here"
ZED

Crustacean
*
« Reply #307 on: 06-17-2003 19:19 »

Homer:This is everyones fault but my own.
Rage Dump

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #308 on: 10-08-2003 20:23 »
« Last Edit on: 10-08-2003 20:23 »

*Bump*
To avoid making another thread.

"Marge - Homer, i think you should throw out that sandwich, I think the mayonaise is starting to turn."
"Homer - Two more feet and i can fit it in the fridge!"
Lt. Kroker

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #309 on: 10-09-2003 11:43 »
« Last Edit on: 10-09-2003 11:43 »

Chalmers: A prayer in a public school! God has no place within these walls, just as fact has no place within organised religion.

Homer: I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all! The terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles! Sure, I might offend a few of the blue-noses with my cocky stride and musty odors -- oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"

EDIT- Just remembered one:
"I want to set the record straight: I thought. The cop. Was a prostitute."
Gleno

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #310 on: 10-09-2003 12:10 »
« Last Edit on: 10-09-2003 12:10 »

Quote
Originally posted by Rage Dump:
*Bump*
To avoid making another thread.

You should really consider changing your name to Rage BUMP....and you're making me look bad....  tongue

From one of the Halloween eps....

"Every moment I live....is agony" *vomits*
"Please kill me" *vomits again*

The frog Bart turns into a "prince"   laff

"Get in there, defend my honour....!!"

Also "eatthepuddingeatthepuddingeat thepuddingeatthepudding"  laff
CTV

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #311 on: 10-09-2003 16:08 »

Mr Burns: Schindler and I are like peas in a pod. We both own factories, we both made shells for the Nazis, but mine worked dammit!

Sideshow Bob: Oh and I suppose it will be up to me to lead the hooting. Oh yeah, shake it madam! Capital knockers!
Rage Dump

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #312 on: 10-09-2003 17:16 »

 
Quote
You should really consider changing your name to Rage BUMP....and you're making me look bad....
As good a time as any...

I think you were asking where that was Gleno, so there you go, still as crappy looking as it was weeks ago.

 
Quote
Sideshow Bob: Oh and I suppose it will be up to me to lead the hooting. Oh yeah, shake it madam! Capital knockers!
Sideshow bob is a legend...

Bart : This whole raid was as useless as that yellow lemon-shaped rock over there...
Wait a minute...
There's a lemon behind that rock!
Jamesbondcja

Professor
*
« Reply #313 on: 10-09-2003 17:20 »

Bart: Guess who?

Cecil: Marris?
leelaholic

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #314 on: 10-09-2003 17:45 »

Singer: You'll never stop The Simpsons!
Have no fears, we've got stories for years like:
Marge becomes a robot!
What if Moe got a cell phone?
Has Bart ever owned a bear?
How about a crazy wedding
where something happens a-do-do-do-do-do!
BigBen

Crustacean
*
« Reply #315 on: 10-21-2007 08:40 »
« Last Edit on: 10-21-2007 08:40 »

Network Exec: You can learn a lot from him Mary Ann

Lisa: It's Lisa

Network Exec: Mary Ann's better!

   cool
mookie427

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #316 on: 10-21-2007 09:16 »

Chalmers: Why is it when I heard the word 'school' and the word 'exploded,' I immediately thought of the word 'SKINNER'?

Mr. Burns : I don't like being outdoors, Smithers. For one thing there are too many fat children.

Ralph: 'Hi, Supernintendo Chalmers'
tyraniak

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #317 on: 10-21-2007 12:41 »

Burns: "My good man, you're the fattest thing I've ever seen, and I've been on safari"
mookie427

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #318 on: 10-21-2007 18:24 »

Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa.
Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product.
Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy?
Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning.
Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart.
Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out.
Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said.
Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case.
Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to.
Homer: Bart, go to your room.

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."

Hans: A poem, by Hans Moleman. I think that I shall never see, my cataracts are blinding me
gudbjorg

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #319 on: 12-02-2008 11:29 »

Apu: Hello, I am not interested in buying your house, but I would like to use your rest room, flip through your magazines, rearrange your carefully shelved items and handle your food products in an unsanitary manner. Ha! Now you know how it feels! [runs off]
Homer: Thank you, come again!
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