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Author Topic: Then He Said...  (Read 3471 times)
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Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #40 on: 08-19-2003 15:43 »

*Falls into a very large hole*
"Patrick, are you ok?"
"FINLAND!"

Spongebob Squarepants
aslate

Space Pope
****
« Reply #41 on: 08-19-2003 15:49 »
« Last Edit on: 08-19-2003 15:49 »

*Blackadder Punches Shakespear*
Blackadder: That is for every schoolboy and schoolgirl for the next 400 years!
  Blackadder Back And Forth
Impossible

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #42 on: 08-19-2003 15:50 »

Gareth Keenan: "Tim's put my stapler inside a jelly again. That's the third time he's done it. It wasn't even funny the first time"

David Brent: "Why has he done that?"

Gareth Keenan: "I told him once that I don't like jelly. I don't trust the way it moves..."
 
 ~ The Office
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #43 on: 08-19-2003 16:20 »

Zim: "You'll be helping Santa build a giant teleporter capable of sending all humans to their doom."
Man in Crowd: "Will this new tradition be fun and Christmassy?"
Zim: "Ha ha ha! Of course you pitiful fool."

-Invader Zim
Gocad

Space Pope
****
« Reply #44 on: 08-19-2003 17:23 »
« Last Edit on: 08-20-2003 00:00 »

Col. Kilgore: "Charlie don't surf!"

- Apocalypse Now Redux
homerjaysimpson

Space Pope
****
« Reply #45 on: 08-19-2003 19:38 »

George W. Bush:[Archive press conference] Today the Justice Department did issue a 'Blanket Alert'. It was in recognition of a general threat that we received. This is not the first time the Justice Department has acted like this. I hope it's the last, but given the attitude of the evil-doers, it may not be.

-Bowling for Columbine
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #46 on: 08-20-2003 01:01 »

Gay people have always been a clean people, ever since they came here from France.
-Peter Griffin
Britz

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #47 on: 08-20-2003 02:29 »

"Well hello Mr fancy pants!"

"I'm not that good."

"Hail to the King, baby."

Ash, "Evil Dead 3, Army of Darkness"
Impossible

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #48 on: 08-20-2003 14:00 »

"A person should not believe in an '-ism', they should believe in themselves"
 ~ Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

or something along those lines, i forget now...
Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #49 on: 08-20-2003 14:05 »
« Last Edit on: 08-20-2003 14:05 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Impossible:
"A person should not believe in an '-ism', they should believe in themselves"
 ~ Ferris Bueller, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

or something along those lines, i forget now...


"....I quote John Lennon, 'I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me'.  Good point there, after all, he was the Walrus.  I could be the Walrus, but I'd still have to bum rides off of people."

  ;)
Impossible

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #50 on: 08-20-2003 14:45 »
« Last Edit on: 08-20-2003 14:45 »

Thanks Melll, I knew you'd know it     ;)

*Gunshot*
Hotlips O'Houlihan: "Oh my God! They've shot him!"
Lieutenant Blake: "Hot Lips, you incredible nincompoop! It's the end of the quarter!"

---------------------

Trapper John: "That one! The sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes! Bring her to me! Take her clothes off and bring her to me!"

    ~ Both from M*A*S*H (1970)

--------------------

"Call me sir, goddammit!"
 ~ Cameron Frye, Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

Mmm, that film is more quotable than I thought it was...


------------------
Otis P Jivefunk

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #51 on: 08-20-2003 15:28 »

"Define irony, a bunch of people on a plane singing to a song by someone who died in a plane crash" - Con Air
Wonderbee31

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #52 on: 08-20-2003 15:58 »
« Last Edit on: 08-20-2003 15:58 »

...and then tell him I said <CLANG> Oooow.

...tell...him... I ...said...ow.

-Slim Pickens and assistant
Blazing Saddles.  :laff:
homerjaysimpson

Space Pope
****
« Reply #53 on: 08-20-2003 17:32 »

Buffy Gilmore: Don't worry, Cindy! We'll pretend this never happened, like the time we got drunk and went down on each other!

-Scary Movie
Dr_Dave

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #54 on: 08-20-2003 17:38 »

Of course, the classic:

"Ah, ah!  I know what you're thinking.  You're thinking did he fire six shots or only five.  To tell you the truth I've lost track myself in all this excitement.  But seeing as this is a .44 magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and will blow your head clean off, you have to ask yourself a question, "Do I feel lucky?".  Well, do you, punk?"

Clint Eastwoood in Dirty Harry.
Lurrr

Professor
*
« Reply #55 on: 08-21-2003 09:33 »

It's been years since I've seen it:

*Jim finds a horse-shaped present in his living room*
Jim (*picks up a letter*): "Jim, thanks for helping me save Christmas. Don't feed the pony rocks like you did with the kitten. Santa." Ooh! I wonder what it could be?

-Earthworm Jim

Crichton: If he masters wormhole technology, what will he use it for?
Scorpius Clone: Faster delivery of pizzas.

Stark: Maybe you have to do more than kiss the princess. Maybe you have to show the princess a really good time.

-Farscape
boingo2000

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #56 on: 08-21-2003 11:54 »

"Forgive you?  Never!  Why, my ancestors would rise from ther graves, and I'd only have to bury them again."
- Duck Soup
Ozor Mox

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #57 on: 08-21-2003 14:38 »

Speaking of MASH...

Henry Blake: What's in here?
Trapper John: Soot.
Henry Blake: I'll be the judge of that...
Soot falls into his face, Hawkeye does that hysterical laugh thing.

Also I remembered a quote from Scary Movie 2 because of something above.

"Do you feel lucky...punk? Well do you? Feel lucky? Doyoufeelluckypunk?"
"Shoot me motherfucker!"
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #58 on: 08-21-2003 16:09 »

How about a line from a radio show???

-Now lads I know you are all enjoying yourselfs, but silence, silence please for the cabret. I have pleasure in presenting those glamourous grandmothers, the three Beverly Sisters!
* gun shot * 
-Correction -- the Beverly Twins!
* gun shot *
-Miss Beverly will sing...
* gun shot *
-Everybody dance!!!

The Goon Show; "This is the story of the year Nineteen Eighty-Five!"
Garbage Picker

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #59 on: 08-21-2003 23:20 »

"Welcome to Jurassic Park"
Future Angel
Bending Unit
***
« Reply #60 on: 08-22-2003 01:11 »

"Girls Kick ass, it says so on the tee shirt."
-Max Guevara, Dark Angel
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #61 on: 08-22-2003 11:21 »

"You know what you are? You're the son of a thousand fathers; all bastards like you!"

-Tuco, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
Gocad

Space Pope
****
« Reply #62 on: 08-22-2003 11:28 »

Deep Throat: "Trust no one."

- The X-Files

Mercapto

Professor
*
« Reply #63 on: 08-22-2003 11:29 »

From The Simpsons episode "Flaming Moe's":

Homer: [sickly sweet]  Oh, look at me! I'm making people happy! I'm the Magical Man from Happy-Land, in a gumdrop house on Lollipop Lane! [leaves the room, slamming the door, then pokes his head back in]  Oh, by the way, I was being sarcastic. [closes the door]
Gocad

Space Pope
****
« Reply #64 on: 08-22-2003 15:49 »

Walter Sobchak: "You are about to enter a world of pain."

- The Big Lebowski
Pitt Clemens

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #65 on: 08-22-2003 16:05 »
« Last Edit on: 08-22-2003 16:05 »

Pres. Merkin Muffley:  Gentlemen!  You can't fight in here.  This is war room!

Maj. Kong: Survival kit contents check.  In them you will find: 1 45-caliber automatic, two boxes of ammunition, 4 days concentrated emergency rations, 1 drug issue containig antibiotic, morphene, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills, 1 minature combination Russian phrase-book and bible, $100 in rubles, $100 in gold, 9 packs of chewing gum,
1 issue prophylactics, 3 lipsticks, 3 pairs of nylon stockings...Shoot!  A fella could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff!

one more.

Gen. Ripper: Mandrake, Do you recall what Clemensau once said about war?

Grp. Capt. Mandrake: No I don't belive I do, sir.

Gen. Ripper:  He said war was too important to be left up to  the generals.  When he said that...30 years ago...he might have been right.  But today, war is to important to be left up to politicians, they have neither the time, the training nor the inclination for strategic thought.  I cannot sit back and allow communist infultration, communist indoctrination, communist subversion and the international communist conspiracy...to sap and impurify...all of our precious bodily fluids!

-Dr. Strangelove, or how I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb.
aslate

Space Pope
****
« Reply #66 on: 08-23-2003 18:50 »
« Last Edit on: 08-23-2003 18:50 »

Kochanski: One more time, and you get this [Spanner]. Do you hear? Don't think i don't mean it, one more time, just one more.
Pipe: Nuureek!
*Hits pipe with spanner*
Kochanski: What did i tell you? I told you. Didn't i tell you? How many times have i told you? Right, what was the last one? "Nureek", so the next one will be a "Retut" and the one after that will be a "Hununga". 4 seconds, 3 seconds, 2 seconds.
Pipe: Ruutut
*Hits pipe with spanner*
Kochanski: Now hununga.
Pipe: Nuureek
Kochanski: No, that's wrong, you've gone out of sequence! Nureek, Retut, Hununga. What's wrong with you?
*Hits pipe with spanner*
Kochanski: If you're going to keep me up all night just do it right ok?
Pipe: Squeelookle
Kochanski: Squeelookle? Where did squeelookle come from? He's new!
  Red Dwarf: Duct Soup
Ozor Mox

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #67 on: 08-23-2003 18:55 »

Dammit those episodes with Kochanski and not Rimmer really pissed me off. These might not be 100% correct but...

Cat: There's just one thing I don't understand
Rimmer: What's that?
Cat: Everything!

Kryten: Can can you hear anything?
Lister: No.
Kryten: That's right, you can't hear anything. And do you know why you can't hear anything? Because there are <extremely funny Kryten voice> NO SOUNDS TO HEAR! </efkv>
Rimmer: Kryten, isn't it about this time of year your head goes back to the labs for re-tuning?
HawkingHole4001

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #68 on: 08-23-2003 22:42 »

"My Other Penis Is a Vagina"
-Bumper sticker, Family Guy
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #69 on: 08-24-2003 04:58 »
« Last Edit on: 08-24-2003 04:58 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ozor Mox:
Dammit those episodes with Kochanski and not Rimmer really pissed me off. These might not be 100% correct but...

Cat: There's just one thing I don't understand
Rimmer: What's that?
Cat: Everything!

Kryten: Can can you hear anything?
Lister: No.
Kryten: That's right, you can't hear anything. And do you know why you can't hear anything? Because there are <extremely funny Kryten voice> NO SOUNDS TO HEAR! </efkv>
Rimmer: Kryten, isn't it about this time of year your head goes back to the labs for re-tuning?

That has to be one of the funniest Red Dwarf episodes ever.
The discussion about the white hole ("So what is it?" ) had me in hysterics, but since that would be too long to write down here, I'll plump for this one.

RIMMER: Five days to get to and from the cargo deck.  It's unbelievable!

KRYTEN: That's two thousand floors, Sir. Without the lift, we made pretty good time.

*An explosion rips them into pieces, shifts them right, and reconstitutes
them.*

KRYTEN: Hmm.  Interesting.

Script taken from here
Arkard

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #70 on: 08-24-2003 09:29 »

"I now pronounce you man and wife. Proceed with the execution!"
-- African Queen
aslate

Space Pope
****
« Reply #71 on: 08-24-2003 10:25 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Zed 85:
  That has to be one of the funniest Red Dwarf episodes ever.
The discussion about the white hole ("So what is it?" ) had me in hysterics, but since that would be too long to write down here, I'll plump for this one.

I was too young to see/enjoy the early ones, what episode was that?
aslate

Space Pope
****
« Reply #72 on: 08-24-2003 10:26 »
« Last Edit on: 08-24-2003 10:26 »

Bloody browser hiccups! Delete please!
Impossible

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #73 on: 08-24-2003 11:21 »
« Last Edit on: 08-24-2003 11:21 »

"And the moral of the story is: Appreciate what you've got, because basically, I'm fantastic!"
 ~ Holly, Red Dwarf II : Queeg
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #74 on: 08-24-2003 11:28 »
« Last Edit on: 08-24-2003 11:28 »

@Aslate: It's a Season 4 episode, simply called The White Hole. I think Season 3-6 are my favourite seasons by far.   :)
Gocad

Space Pope
****
« Reply #75 on: 08-24-2003 18:07 »

And now "The Best of Milton Dammers!"

"You are violating my territorial bubble!"

"My body is a roadmap of pain!"

"You're right. I'm an asshole... with an Uzi!"

- The Frighteners
Ozor Mox

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #76 on: 08-24-2003 18:20 »

 
Quote
I was too young to see/enjoy the early ones, what episode was that?

As Zed 85 said (wooo another Red Dwarf fan!), the episode "White Hole" where they discover the opposite of a black hole. It spews time causing things to happen in the wrong order and at random times. It's the episode where Lister plays pool with planets.

<Rimmer>You jammy git!</Rimmer>

 
Quote
"And the moral of the story is: Appreciate what you've got, because basically, I'm fantastic!"
~ Holly, Red Dwarf II : Queeg

Another fantastic episode! Was that the one where at the start he claims to have invented two new notes. "Triangles will have four sides!"
Jamesbondcja

Professor
*
« Reply #77 on: 08-24-2003 18:52 »
« Last Edit on: 08-27-2004 00:00 »

I have an IQ of 1000 the same as 1000 PE teachers together.

Red Dwarf

SPOOOOOOOOON!

The Tick

Ozor Mox

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #78 on: 08-24-2003 19:00 »

I thought it was something like...

Rimmer: He (Queeg) has an IQ of 12000.
Holly: That's only the same as 6000 car park attendants.
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #79 on: 08-25-2003 11:10 »

You're most likely right, but I'm sure I remember somthing about PE teachers...

Oh that reminds me.

Baldrick: I heard it (World War I) all started when a guy called Archie Duke shot an Ostrich 'cos he was hungry!
Edmund: I think you mean it all started when the Arch-Duke of Austro-Hungary was shot.
Baldrick: No, there was definitely an Ostrich involved!
Edmund: Well possibly!
[Thus talks about the real reasons the war started --"It was too difficult not to have a war"-- and then the 2 triple alliances before the war]
Edmund(continued):...each acted as the other deterant. That way, there could never be a war!
Baldrick: Well...this is a sort of a war isn't it?
Edmund: Yes, well you see there was one slight flaw in the plan...
George: And what was that?
Edmund: ...It was bollocks!

-Blackadder Goes Forth
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