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Author Topic: IT STINKS!!! ...or not.  (Read 8503 times)
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Future Angel
Bending Unit
***
« Reply #440 on: 11-07-2003 19:00 »

Someone at work told me the Wachowski (sorry for the spelling) Brothers have alreay written the 4th and 5th Matrix movies, but have other projects of higher priority.

Elf
Super funny. The whole theater was laughing throughout most of the movie. For once the trailers don't take all of the best parts of the movie.

Speli

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #441 on: 11-07-2003 22:11 »

Matrix Revolutions
It was much better than I expected. I mean, if I said anything about the movie I'd be spoiling, so I'll just not except for one thing I noticed. For anyone who has seen the Animatrix:
4.8/5
P.S.: I have enough closure with this movie, Wachowskis, thank you. No more Matrix, please.
Otis P Jivefunk

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #442 on: 11-08-2003 05:52 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Speli:
Matrix Revolutions
P.S.: I have enough closure with this movie, Wachowskis, thank you. No more Matrix, please.

I agree, but I'm not so sure they'll see it that way...

Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #443 on: 11-08-2003 06:00 »

Speli, I knew that about the kid just by seeing Reloaded, as Keanu Reeves repeats his line "I didn't save you, you saved yourself." in Reloaded and in Kids Story.

I'm seeing Revolutions this weekend, so I'm holding off reading most of the stuff about it.
Speli

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #444 on: 11-08-2003 10:57 »

Well I didn't see the Animatrix until right before Revolutions...
~FazeShift~

Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #445 on: 11-08-2003 13:00 »

You're such a smelly head!

But you liked Revolutions, so I won't chop off your raping device this time.
Dose_Me_Up

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #446 on: 11-08-2003 22:10 »

Just got back from seeing Love Actually.

It's a series of intertwining stories all dealing with love. The characters are all somehow connected through friends and family and they weave in and out of each other's lives. It's set in London and it is very glossy - London is clean, glamorous and full of beautiful people. Being British it's always funny to see how London is presented in film, especially as this is a British fim, albeit mostly made with American money.

Anyway, the jokes are good, there are a few jibes at Americans that I really appreciated as well   wink. There are many cameos, both from British famous people and American famous people, at times it becomes a spot the face game. Anyone who's watched British TV will recognise pretty much every character in every scene. Overall, it's merely frothy feel good nonsense, however it happens to be very well done frothy feel good nonsense. If you want an alternative to the Matrix then go see it. Jolly good show 7/10.

M Jackson
Professor
*
« Reply #447 on: 11-09-2003 13:02 »
« Last Edit on: 11-09-2003 13:02 »

          The Matrix Revolutions

I think the world has become a pretty sad place if a film with as much imagination, originaltiy, and sheer WOW factor as The Matrix Revolutions can be summed up as simply "OK"!
I loved this film! Now that i've seen it, the previous two films also benifit. The trilogy feels complete.
There are some problems with revolutions. Like Reloaded it took a while to get going. Some scenes just felt a bit..."off" (but I'm sure they'll grow on me with repeated viewing). The Wachowski brothers have steered the trilogy in a different direction to what I had expected. But wait...That's a good thing. Nobody can accuse them of simply rehashing the original film. The Matrix Revolutions appears to be splitting audiences opinions. Those who have slated it are a bunch of ungrateful snotty bastards! I mean really, what does it take to impress some people!
As much as I enjoyed the trilogy I realise it is far from perfect. But to be honest, I don't care!

The Matrix Revoltions: ****
                       8/10
                       80%

The Matrix Trilogy: ****& 1/2
                    9/10
                    90%
Ozor Mox

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #448 on: 11-09-2003 14:17 »

 
Quote
I think the world has become a pretty sad place if a film with as much imagination, originaltiy, and sheer WOW factor as The Matrix Revolutions can be summed up as simply "OK"!

It's a bit unfair to say that, since the kind of film that The Matrix is almost certainly will not appeal to everyone. I thought it was "OK", I enjoyed it but didn't have the same "wow, it's amazing" feeling as a lot of other people had. I haven't seen Revolutions yet, but I will do soon. I expect to feel the same way about that as I did about the second one.
Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #449 on: 11-09-2003 16:16 »
« Last Edit on: 11-09-2003 16:16 »

The Matrix: Revolutions

What we expected: The best sci-fi (nay, any) movie ever!
What we got: A great addition to the genre.  nothing more.

After the unrealistic expectations of Reloaded, I had no preconceived notion of what to expect of Revolutions, and therefore no hopes to dash.

So, that said.  I enjoyed the film, I thought that the ending wasn't too sucky - even if it left some questions unanswered (but I gather they are left for us to answer ourselves, without the need for another movie to hammer the point home).  The large set-piece sequence (the dock battle) was simply breathtaking, and the movie slight more violent and bloody than the other two.

I stick with my opinion of this, the trilogy overall is a great addition to the Sci-Fi genre, and wasn't really meant to be taken (in movie terms) as the second coming.   wink

8/10

EDIT: Oh, and Monica Bellucci is a piece of ass!  tongue
evan

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #450 on: 11-10-2003 20:29 »
« Last Edit on: 11-10-2003 20:29 »

Matrix: Revolutions (aka, Secondary Characters on Parade!)

I want to just give this as my review. A conversation I had with VF.

me: it's all blah blah blah for 20 minutes, crappy fight, blah blah blah
her: stupid zion stuff
me: then the big battle, then Neo v. Smith, then stupid ending

But if there's one thing I'm good at, it's ripping apart bad movies.

Okay, Zion is dumb. It's just every post-apocalpytic wasteland rolled into one. The Matrix is where our heros can do spectacular physical feats. Agent Smith, the Oracle, and the Architect are all in the Matrix. So why is like 75 % of this movie and Reloaded in Zion?

Precocious child prodigy? ::groan::

WB must have been handing out long term contracts on this one. Everyone returns!Niobe! Asian Guy (Player Character 2 in Enter the Matrix)! The Merovigan! Persephone! Link! Link's wife! Grizzy General! Grizzy Captain who used to date Niobe! Dozer's wife! Grizzly Captain who Looks Like Chris Cooper! Kid! Grizzly councilman! The Architect! Seraph! Grizzly and unwashed Zionists! They're all back, and they mean business! I swear, I think Morpheus had about as much to do in this movie as Persephone's breasts. And they were both bald and smooth.

The only things that don't return are the answers to the questions from Reloaded. The combined screen time of the Architect, the Merovengian, and Persephone is probably under 10 minutes. The All-Powerful Source, that Neo absolutely had to reach in Reloaded? Never mentioned. Reloaded gave us questions. Revolutions didn't answer them.

But there's lots of Exposition! The machines are coming to destroy Zion, but not before the peaceful and orderly council meeting. There are only 20 hours left to live, but everyone has to have a friendly chat with the Oracle. And the Oracle has that cute kid now, too! Yay!

The fight scenes. The first fight, the one versus the Merovigian's goons, could have been good. But it was way too short. Minutes were probably cut out to give room for more talking! Speaking of which, why was the Merovingian in this movie anyway? His part was in and out in 15, tops. He wasn't a threat at all.

The Zionists v. the Machines. It was like H.R. Geiger and M.C. Esher decided to duke it out. Zion, the Zionists, their machinery, the knock-off Power Loaders, and the Squidiees all looked the same. And, in the super-close up framing of it all, it was almost impossible to tell what was going on. It was one large swirming mass of black and red. My eyes! The goggles, they do nothing!

I did like the Neo v. Smith fight, though. That was the film's only redeeming quality. Unlike some on this board, I liked the flying battle sequence. It added a new layer to what was becoming a stale battle sequence. And it kept me interesting, unlike their fight in Reloaded.

What else, what else...if Smith's the major villian, why is he only in this movie for 30 minutes, tops? I thought we were told that Revolutions would be all Smith, all the time? Hugo Weaving deserves an award for carrying this series.

I think Morpheus disappeared halfway through this movie and no one noticed.

The whole Train Station idea was stupid. Well, it could have been decent, if given time. But all Merovingian stuff seemed totally rushed. Cut for more time talkin' in Zion, probably. They spent more time talking about why the Oracle looked different than the fight with the Merovingian's goons.

Trinity getting skewered and Neo not noticing was pretty funny.

And the ending made no sense. Why would the machines free the humans if they still needed them for power? And, anyway, Zion didn't beat the machines, they just staved off their deaths. And who's to say the machines don't break the truce?

If you couldn't tell, I did not like this movie. Reloaded was decent. This was so so so disappointing. Grade - D,D+
boingo2000

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #451 on: 11-11-2003 09:32 »

Intolerable Cruelty

So this is what it would be like if the Coen Bros. made a commercial film.  It's not bad, but it's perhaps the most mediocr Coen Bros. movie ever. George Cloony is charming, and Catherine Zeta-Jones is seductive, but there is absolutly no chemistry between the two.  Still, the Coen's write the best character names in film (ie, Rex Rexwroth) and the fate of Wheezy Joe had the whole theatre laughing.

Grade: B-
LAN.gnome

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #452 on: 11-14-2003 01:19 »
« Last Edit on: 11-17-2003 00:00 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Future Angel:
Elf
Super funny. The whole theater was laughing throughout most of the movie. For once the trailers don't take all of the best parts of the movie.

Hell yes.

I echo my statements from the SNL thread:
1.) Will Ferrell is in it.
2.) Will Ferrell is awesome.
They also decided to throw in Andy Richter (formerly of Late Night with Conan O'Brien) and Kyle Gaas (of Tenacious D, Jack Black's band).

This has to be about the funniest recent PG movie I've seen. It's just straight up physical humor, with some situational comedy tossed in (what with Will Ferrell acting like an elf and all). Watching Ferrell assemble his sugar-spaghetti from hell is both a wonder and a terror to behold. "You sure do like sugar, don't you?" "Is there sugar in maple syrup?" "There is." "Then YES!"   laff

Will Ferrell is basically playing the same role he did in Zoolander -- except I don't mean Mugatu, I mean Little Cletus, and I don't mean what you saw of him in the film either, but the Little Cletus of the deleted scenes (fans of the movie will know what I'm on about):
"I was a clown for Halloween! What were YOU?"
"Do you collect comics? ...little kid things."

Seriously, this movie is hilarious. An A-.
Juliet

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #453 on: 11-14-2003 11:47 »

I seen the trailer of Elf and I want to see it. I have never seen any Will Ferrell’s movies but I have seen him on TV and he is really funny.

So if I get some money and stuff I will give this movie a try.
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #454 on: 11-21-2003 23:46 »

Looney Tunes Back In Action
A decent movie. Not as good as Roger Rabbit, but I still thought that it was clever. I just love mixing 2D animation with live action anyway. I don't recommend it to everyone, just sick cartoon wacktoids like me.
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #455 on: 11-21-2003 23:50 »

Gothika
It was fun. Wait, not fun, more disturbing than fun. But I like disturbing movies that try to freak you out. Except for the lack of Halle Berry's berries, it was a good thriller movie. It reminded me of Silence of the Lambs and Red Dragon.
Action Jacktion

Professor
*
« Reply #456 on: 11-22-2003 02:22 »

Fun fact: Gothika was directed by the guy who played Nino Quincampoix in Amélie.
Mr. Potter

Professor
*
« Reply #457 on: 11-22-2003 18:27 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Action Jacktion:
Fun fact: Gothika was directed by the guy who played Nino Quincampoix in Amélie.

That's enough for me to go and see it.

Jeremy

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #458 on: 11-25-2003 02:10 »
« Last Edit on: 11-25-2003 02:10 »

The Missing

Meh.   tongue

edit: The more I think about it, the crappier it becomes. Too long, bad plot, the acting is nothing special. Meh, indeed. I want my money back, Ron Howard! "You saw it for free!" Then give me a hat!
PIFLNJFC

Crustacean
*
« Reply #459 on: 11-25-2003 05:43 »
« Last Edit on: 11-25-2003 05:43 »

I loved the first Matrix film, but the second one i found was a bit ponitless spoes cos 2,3 were ment to be one film but the third it was great until the end
I HATED THAT ENDING!!!
  mad
FishyJoe

Honorary German
Urban Legend
***
« Reply #460 on: 11-25-2003 07:31 »

Elf

I expected it to be in the "Master of Disguise" genre of crappy kiddie flicks made by SNL stars, but it was actually pretty funny. However, as soon as the end turned all feel-good and holiday-ey, I left. I suggest you do the same.

The Cat In The Hat

I saw the last 20 minutes of this. I was amazed. The fact that crap like this actually gets made makes me want to either a)kill myself, or b)stand up and applaud. You know, The Grinch sucked, and Jim Carrey sucks, but at least Jim Carrey acted somewhat Grinch-ish in that movie. Why the hell did Mike Meyers decide to use his Linda Richmond voice for the cat in the hat?

When the credits started to roll, there was no noise in the theater. I expected to hear some idiots saying "wow, that was really good! Way better than I expected", or something. But no. I think everyone was stunned, by the badness of it all. They got up quiety, and exited single-file. So I thought, screw these people--I'll create my own buzz.

"That was great!" I said, to nobody in particular. "This is my third time seeing it today--it just gets better and better!". I didn't get a single reaction from anyone.
Ben

Space Pope
****
« Reply #461 on: 11-25-2003 08:16 »
« Last Edit on: 11-25-2003 08:16 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Speli:
Did anyone notice that that sixteen year old was the kid from "Kid's Story"? Because it is!

That doesn't need to be in spoilers because;

a) He was in the second film as well (I’m not sure when the contents of a film become part of the public conscience, but I assume after six months, it has.)

b) Duh...


Hmmm, movies I've seen recently...

LXG: Absurd. 1/10

Kill Bill Volume 1: Self-indulgent but in a good way. Fantastic stylistically, and I realise why the snappy dialogue is gone, but I miss it all the same. 8/10

Matrix 3: Structureless, empty spectacle. There is no bar, Joel, because no-one can see it buried in the shit spewing forth from your collective mouths. Self-indulgent in a bad way. 3.5/10

School of Rock: Terrible story, great genre humour. Disposable fun. 6/10

*sigh* I need to go see some real films.

"Ben is right, apparently" - Pikka Bird
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #462 on: 11-25-2003 09:05 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by FishyJoe:
Elf

I expected it to be in the "Master of Disguise" genre of crappy kiddie flicks made by SNL stars, but it was actually pretty funny. However, as soon as the end turned all feel-good and holiday-ey, I left. I suggest you do the same.

The Cat In The Hat

I saw the last 20 minutes of this. I was amazed. The fact that crap like this actually gets made makes me want to either a)kill myself, or b)stand up and applaud. You know, The Grinch sucked, and Jim Carrey sucks, but at least Jim Carrey acted somewhat Grinch-ish in that movie. Why the hell did Mike Meyers decide to use his Linda Richmond voice for the cat in the hat?

When the credits started to roll, there was no noise in the theater. I expected to hear some idiots saying "wow, that was really good! Way better than I expected", or something. But no. I think everyone was stunned, by the badness of it all. They got up quiety, and exited single-file. So I thought, screw these people--I'll create my own buzz.

"That was great!" I said, to nobody in particular. "This is my third time seeing it today--it just gets better and better!". I didn't get a single reaction from anyone.

I suggest that you either a) kill yourself, or b) jam your keyboard up your ass

I'm not disagreeing with you about The Cat In The Hat being a bad movie. But I am pissed that you find Jim Carrey's comedy so bad.  no no
Mr. Potter

Professor
*
« Reply #463 on: 11-25-2003 10:04 »

Jim Carrey's comedy is bad. I prefer him in his dramatic roles like The Truman Show (actually only in The Truman Show) 
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #464 on: 11-25-2003 10:19 »

i loved the grinch, i thought it was great. But i pretty much agree about The Cat in the Hat. Some parts where actually funny but Mike got annoying fairly often. Dakota Fanning was awesome, as always. She's good enough to do way better movies, but i guess i can't blame her for wanting to be in Cat in the Hat cause she is 9. But i admit it was painful to see her in this movie right after having seen her in Taken.
LAN.gnome

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #465 on: 11-25-2003 21:14 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Slurm Guy:
I'm not disagreeing with you about The Cat In The Hat being a bad movie. But I am pissed that you find Jim Carrey's comedy so bad.   no no

Because a man talking through his ass is comic genius.  no no
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #466 on: 11-25-2003 21:36 »
« Last Edit on: 11-25-2003 21:36 »

A man talking through his ass is comic genius.  laff
TheLastGreatDon

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #467 on: 11-25-2003 22:50 »

The Truman Show is my favorite crying clown film of all time and my #1 on the top 10 Jim Carrey films. And ass talk is fucking retarded\hilarious.
FishyJoe

Honorary German
Urban Legend
***
« Reply #468 on: 11-26-2003 03:35 »

Settle down, boyo's. If it's any consolation, I thought Jim Carrey turned in an oscar-worthy performance in Dumb & Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd.
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #469 on: 11-26-2003 07:15 »

You retarded retard! Quit making stupid jokes!
FishyJoe

Honorary German
Urban Legend
***
« Reply #470 on: 11-26-2003 07:52 »

Who's joking? Seriously, that was a good movie.
TheLastGreatDon

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #471 on: 11-26-2003 08:28 »

God help your insignificant soul.
LAN.gnome

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #472 on: 11-27-2003 18:54 »

Timeline

Sweet zombie Jesus, can it get much worse than this? This is such a terrible adaptations of Crichton's novel I refuse to believe it's the product of the director who brought us "Superman".

Who the hell was in charge of casting this movie? How is Paul Walker supposed to be the son of Billy Connolly? Growing up around a father with such an over-the-top Scottish accent, you'd think the son would pick some of it up, but no -- Chris sounds more the product of SoCal than Glasgow. Oddly, the part of Arnaut, leader of the French army, was played by Lambert Wilson -- name not familiar? It wasn't to me either, but the second you realize they cast the Merovingian as a medieval Frenchman, you wonder if this is somebody's idea of a joke.

The movie's big battle scene -- the one they show in all the trailers -- plays like a B-grade version of the Helm's Deep sequence in The Two Towers. All the ingredients are there: archers with flaming arrows, siege ladders, horseback charges and explosions -- just add a couple of trebuchets and ratchet down the excitement level a few dozen notches, and you have Timeline's Castlegard sequence.

Note to Hollywood: Stop making movies out of Crichton's books. You've proven that by and large, you just can't do it. Your best translation from page to screen was Jurassic Park, which is unsurprisingly the one film that stuck closest to the novel's plot and characters. Either take more out of the books than character names, key plot points, and the "oh wow, wouldn't that be cool to see?" factor, or stop trying.

I give this "film" a D-.
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #473 on: 11-27-2003 21:21 »
« Last Edit on: 11-27-2003 21:21 »

The Cat In The Hat
I must be the only person in the world who enjoyed this movie. I'm sorry, but I thought that it was fun. It was like a cartoon without the 2D. It was so wacky that it made me want to live in that world. I probably liked it because everybody hates me, and everybody hates it. And I'm just a big kid so I loved it.
VelourFog

Space Pope
****
« Reply #474 on: 11-27-2003 21:55 »

Slurm Guy, you don't need to get defensive about it but you could try being a little more civil to other people. If you really feel the need to fight about SNL actors then maybe you should just take a couple deep breaths first.

Elf
Saw it today for our annual "bother the poor teenagers who have to work on a holiday" tradition. It was totally precious and only made me want to throw up a few times near the very end. I liked the Carl Winslow character and the sugar eating (looked good to me) and the cute light handed love story subplot. Also liked the lack of stupid SNL accents.
Jeremy

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #475 on: 11-27-2003 22:01 »

Carl Winslow character?
Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Uterus?
Slurm Guy

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #476 on: 11-27-2003 22:17 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by VelourFog:
Slurm Guy, you don't need to get defensive about it but you could try being a little more civil to other people. If you really feel the need to fight about SNL actors then maybe you should just take a couple deep breaths first.

All I was saying was that I liked the movie. I wasn't bashing anyone else or being an ass. And I certainly wasn't trying to fight about SNL actors.
bankrupt

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #477 on: 11-27-2003 23:59 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by LAN.gnome:
Timeline

Sweet zombie Jesus, can it get much worse than this? This is such a terrible adaptations of Crichton's novel I refuse to believe it's the product of the director who brought us "Superman".



I read the book when it first came out and I knew someone was going to try to make a movie out of it.  The second I saw Paul Walker was part of it I knew it would most likely suck.  They should have spent the extra money and got Vin Diesel too.  Then it would have been a good movie.

Spaz_man

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #478 on: 11-29-2003 09:07 »

they could use really fast cars and go so fast that they go back in time and cant get back cause they are too stupid to just use the cars to go forward in time. oooooh i smell a sequel
VelourFog

Space Pope
****
« Reply #479 on: 11-29-2003 11:42 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Jeremy:
Carl Winslow character?
Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Uterus?
if you've seen "Elf" and still can't figure out my comment then I want my reproductive organs back
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