Futurama   Planet Express Employee Lounge
The Futurama Message Board

Design and Support by Can't get enough Futurama
Help Search Futurama chat Login Register

PEEL - The Futurama Message Board    It's got a TV!    Favorite Simpsons gags « previous next »
Author Topic: Favorite Simpsons gags  (Read 2026 times)
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4 Print
Impossible

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #40 on: 08-09-2002 14:36 »

Homer: Look at me! I'm a puffy pink cloud!
diagnostic

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #41 on: 08-09-2002 14:51 »

Heydilly-ho! Welcome to your new home neglect-areenos!
Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #42 on: 08-09-2002 15:18 »

Flanders: I'm a murderer, I'm a mur-diddly-urderer.

Bart: If that ain't Flanders, he's done his homework.
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #43 on: 08-09-2002 16:08 »

From that brilliant episode "Homerpalooza":

Corgan: "Hey cannonball, I like your statement: when life takes a cheap shot at you, you stand your ground. Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins."
Homer: "Homer Simpson, smiling politely."

From the excellent "Homer At The Bat" (technically not a gag, but one of the best songs of the series so far):

Well, Mr. Burns had done it.
The power plant had won it.
With Roger Clemens clucking all the while.
Mike Scioscia's tragic illness made us smile.
While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile.

We're talkin'...Softball
From Maine to San Diego.
Talkin'...Softball.
Mattingly and Canseco.
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw.
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law.
We're talkin' Homer...Ozzie, and the Straw. 

We're talkin'...Softball
From Maine to San Diego.
Talkin'...Softball.
Mattingly and Canseco.
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw.
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law.
We're talkin' Homer...Ozzie, and the Straw. 
haleys_comet

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #44 on: 08-11-2002 20:36 »

Homer: ohhh he card read good
Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #45 on: 08-11-2002 21:12 »

Homer: You people have stood in my way long enough.....I'm going to clown college.

Bart: I don't think any of us were expecting him to say that.
Speli

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #46 on: 08-11-2002 21:14 »

No, the best of that episode was when he was dilusional, when the people caught fire and he saw dancing clowns...
Melllvar

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #47 on: 08-11-2002 21:17 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Speli:
No, the best of that episode was when he was dilusional, when the people caught fire and he saw dancing clowns...

Oooh yeah, forgot that bit. 

"Clowns are funny"
haleys_comet

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #48 on: 08-11-2002 22:08 »
« Last Edit on: 08-11-2002 22:08 »


Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #49 on: 08-11-2002 22:11 »

"That's great, honey. I'm gonna go eat mayonnaise."
Just Chris

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #50 on: 08-11-2002 23:52 »

Why it's good to read literature now and then:

Hypnotist: "You are now a famous writer."
Homer: "Look, I'm a famous writer!"
Hypnotist: "You are now Emily Dickinson."
Homer: "Look, I'm Emily Dickinson!"
(audience claps)
ghoulishmoose

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #51 on: 08-12-2002 17:45 »

In the episode where Lisa has a crush on Nelson,  sorry for not knowing the name of the episode but I'm not as big a fan of the Simpsons as I am of Futurama. Anyway, its in the classroom scene where the letter that Lisa wrote is being passed down the class to Nelson. And he opens it and reads 'Guess who loves you?' and he turns around to see Millhouse waving at him. Then in the next scene we see Millhouse being carted out of the school on a stretcher to an ambulance.  laff
I love that part. Its so funny
haleys_comet

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #52 on: 08-12-2002 21:19 »

Homer the pidgeon in the ep Bart Carny.
Moe's knife contest with Han's Moleman: "You call that a knife. This is a knife" from the movie Crocadile Dundee.
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #53 on: 08-12-2002 22:43 »

I was watching my Season 2 DVD today. And guess which episode I saw?

Yep. The one where Homer falls down the gorge.

Best... gag... EVER.
FishyJoe

Honorary German
Urban Legend
***
« Reply #54 on: 08-13-2002 17:17 »

"That's not a knife. THIS is a knife."

"That's not a knife, that's a spoon."

"Alright then. I see you've played knifey-spooney before."
diagnostic

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #55 on: 08-13-2002 20:55 »

"Hey, why didnt you get something useful, like storm windows, or a nice pipe organ? I'm thirsty! Oooh, what smells like mustard? There sure are a lot of ugly people in your neighborhood. Oh, look at that one! Ow, my glaucoma just got worse. The president is a Demmycrat..."


"Whats eatin' you, Abe? For three weeks, all you been talking about is Matlock. Now you met him, swiped his pills..."
Shadowstar

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #56 on: 08-13-2002 21:30 »
« Last Edit on: 08-13-2002 21:30 »

I also like the sight gag of Bart as the Raven in "Treehouse of Horror"
...
Yes, I also have been watching the Season 2 DVD.
And Teral, and speaking of songs...

Whether igloo, hut or vindu or a geodesic dome,
there's no structure that I've been to that I'd rather call my home.

Well, when I first arrived you were all such jerks
But now I've come to loooooovvve... your quirks!
Maggie with her eyes so bright,
Marge with hair by Frank Llyod Wright
Lisa can philosphise
Bart's adept at spinning lies
Homer's a delightful fella
Sorry 'bout the salmonella
Homer: Heh heh, that's OK

Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Now here's the tricky part,
Oh won't you rhyme with me?

Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Marge: Their floors are sticky-mart!
Lisa: They make Dad sicky-mart!
Bart: Let's hurl a bricky-mart!
Homer: The Kwik-E-Mart is really-D'oh!

All: Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Not meeeeeeeeeeee!
Simpsons: Forget the Kwik-E-Mart, good-bye to Kwik-E-Mart, who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Not me!

Homer: Ah, everything really wrapped up nicely, hmm, much quicker than usual
Marge: I guess we've learned that happiness is wherever you find it.
Homer: And we've all found happiness, every one of us.

Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart...
I doooooo...
Homer: Hey, wait a minute, he's not happy at all, he lied to us through song! I hate when people do that!
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #57 on: 08-13-2002 22:36 »

Some men hunt for sport, others hunt for food...
The only thing I'm hunting for... is an outfit that looks goooooood...

See... my... vest! See my vest!
Made from real gorilla chest!
Like my sweater? There's no better
Than authentic Irish setter.
Like my hat? T'was my cat,
My eveningwear, a vampire bat.
These white slippers are albino African endangered rhino,
Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtles' necks, I've got my share,
Beret of poodle, on my noodle it shall resssssst...
Try my red robin suit,
It comes one breast or two.
See my vest,
See my vest,
See my vest!

Liiiiiike.... myyyyyy... loafers?
Former gophers.
But a greyhound-skin tuxedo would be best...
So let's prepare thse dogs--
Kill two for matching clogs!--
See my vest,
See my vest,
Oh pleeeeaaaaase, won't you seeeeeee
my vest!


I really like the vest.
Ben

Space Pope
****
« Reply #58 on: 08-13-2002 22:56 »

"Uh...Murphy... Use...you are a elf...uncontrollably...I think ...a we nom yo ho renge kyo."
haleys_comet

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #59 on: 08-15-2002 01:17 »
« Last Edit on: 08-15-2002 01:17 »

Judge: How do you find the defendant?
Juryman: He's guilty of mayhem, exposure indecent.
Man: Freaked out behavior both chronic and recent
Jury: Drinking and driving, narcotics possession
Foreman: And that's just page one of his ten page confession
Judge: I should put you away where you can't kill or maim us, but this is
LA, and you're rich and famous

Criminal:I'm checking in
All: He's checking in
Criminal: I'm checking in
All: Checking, checking in
Criminal: No more pills or alcohol, No more pot or Demerol, no more stinking fun at all, I'm checking in
All: He's checking in, He's checking in
Doctor: No more looking pale and thin, No more bugs beneath you're skin Criminal: Hey, that's just my aspirin
All: Chuck it out, you're checking in
MuscaDomestica

Professor
*
« Reply #60 on: 08-15-2002 07:51 »
« Last Edit on: 08-15-2002 07:51 »

From Snpp...

     Ape: Help, the human's about to escape.
    Troy: Get your paws off me, you dirty ape.
    Apes: [gasping] He can talk!
    Apes: [in unison, rythmed]
  He can talk
  He can talk
  He can talk
  He can talk
  He can talk
  He can talk
    Troy: [singing] I can siiiiiing!

   [funky beat of "Rock Me Amadeus" starts playing]
Female Nurse Ape: Ooh, help me Dr. Zaius!
    Apes: [in unison]
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
  Oh... Dr. Zaius
     Ape: Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius.

    Troy: What's wrong with me?
   Zaius: I think you're crazy.
    Troy: Want a second opinion.
   Zaius: You're also lazy.

    Apes: [in unison]
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
  Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius
   [one ape starts breakdancing]
  Oh... Dr. Zaius
     Ape: Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius.

    Troy: Can I play the piano anymore?
   Zaius: Of course you can.
    Troy: Well I couldn't before!
   [plays piano]

"You'll Never Make a Monkey Out of Me"   

    Troy: [singing]
  I hate every ape I see
  From chimpan-a to chimpan-zee
  No you'll never make a monkey out of me

  Oh my God, I was wrong
  It was Earth all along
  You've finally made a monkey

    Apes: Yes we've finally made a monkey

    Troy: Yes you've finally made a monkey out of me
    Apes: Yes we've  finally made a monkey out of you

    Troy: I love you, Dr. Zaius!
Shadowstar

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #61 on: 08-15-2002 08:31 »

I drunk some Joe in Tahoe
They gave me one to three
My high-priced lawyer sprung me on a technicality
I'm just visiting Springfield Prison
I get to sleep at home tonight.
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #62 on: 08-15-2002 14:06 »

Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the Metric System down?
We do!
We do!

Who keeps Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
We do!
We do!

Who holds back the electric car?
Who made Steve Gutenberg a star?
We do!
We do!

Who robs cave fish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
We do!
We DOOOOOOOO!
Sarge

Professor
*
« Reply #63 on: 08-15-2002 21:43 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Ben:
"Uh...Murphy... Use...you are a elf...uncontrollably...I think ...a we nom yo ho renge kyo."
I don't know how to correctly spell it, but "a we nom yo ho renge kyo" is a Hare Krishna chant. (True story. That's why Matt snuck it in.)
Sarge

Professor
*
« Reply #64 on: 08-15-2002 21:48 »

Homers' narration-"It wasn't easy juggling a pregnant wife & a 2 year old son, but somehow I managed to fit in 8 hours of TV a day."
haleys_comet

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #65 on: 08-16-2002 02:10 »

Shary: In front of a tavern, flat on his face, a boozehound named Barney is pleading his case
Barney: Buy me a beer, two bucks a glass.
Come on, help me, I'm freezing my ass. Buy me brandy, a snifter of wine. Who am I kidding? I'll drink turpentine

Moe: Move it, ya drunk, or I'll blast your rear end
Barney: I found two bucks
Moe: Then come in, my friend
Guy

Professor
*
« Reply #66 on: 08-16-2002 14:22 »

It was a deleted scene, but what the hell....

(Homer is a blackjack dealer. James Bond is playing the villain with the white cat. Homer gives Bond the card)

Bond: Joker? You were supposed to take those out of the pack.
Homer: Oh, sorry, here's a fresh one.
Bond: Rules for playing stud poker?
Villain: What a pity Mr Bond....
(Bond is dragged off)
Bond: But, it was Homer's fault. I didn't lose. I never lose. Well at least tell me your plot for world domination.
Villain: Ha ha, I'm not falling for that one again....
diagnostic

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #67 on: 08-16-2002 19:44 »

I love that part in the episode "bart vs australia" when barts going to get his punishment and that guy comes out with a giant boot.  laff

"nine hundred dollaridoos!?"


Ricky

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #68 on: 08-17-2002 15:45 »

Where are the stars you loved yesterday?
Where did they go, did they all pass away?
Was it drugs or a car crash or facelift gone wrong?
No they're right here in Branson and siiinging this soooong
Just Chris

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #69 on: 08-19-2002 00:35 »

   Aka ni taishite burei da!  Yoguri ni yoberu!
   Subtitle: I'm disrespectful to dirt!

   Honki da yo!
   Subtitle: Can you see that I am serious?

   Kore!  Minna doke!  Burabura shiteru tokoro ja nai!
   Subtitle: Out of my way, all of you!  This is no place for loafers!

   Ore to issho ni nasu ka, shinu ki ka?  [or possibly "shi no ki ka"]
   Subtitle: Join me or die!  Can you do any less?

   Aa!  Isamashii houmu rogo desu ne?
   Subtitle: What a brave corporate logo!

   Misutaa Supaakoru no charengi ni ojimasu!
   Subtitle: I accept the challenge of Mr. Sparkle!

   Ausuma pauwa!
   Awesome power!

   Natsu yasumi no keikaku wa aru deshou?
   Subtitle: What are your plans for summer vacation?

   Misutaa Supaakoru!  Un no yoo besuto washuuuuuu!
   Subtitle: For lucky best wash, use Mr. Sparkle!

I wonder why they use subtitles for every foreign language spoken except for Apu's language.
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #70 on: 08-19-2002 01:22 »

"Well, it was a good run while it lasted. Let's go home."

"We are home"

"That was fast."
Sarge

Professor
*
« Reply #71 on: 08-19-2002 02:48 »

 laff I love that line, Kryten!
Sarge

Professor
*
« Reply #72 on: 08-19-2002 02:51 »

Homer-"HeyBartyawannaseemynewchainsa w&hockeymask?!!"
~FazeShift~

Moderator
DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #73 on: 08-19-2002 16:00 »

Homer: "Don't worry boy, I'll get you a new elephant."

Blackheart: "I'll take that one too."

Homer: "Deal, here's the keys!"

Blackheart: ".....elephants don't HAVE keys....."

Homer: "I'll just keep these then!"

also:

"D'OH!"
"A DEER!"
"A FEMALE DEER!"

"Live forever or die trying."
Guy

Professor
*
« Reply #74 on: 08-19-2002 16:02 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Shadowstar:
I drunk some Joe in Tahoe
They gave me one to three
My high-priced lawyer sprung me on a technicality
I'm just visiting Springfield Prison
I get to sleep at home tonight.

I thought it was "I slugged some jerk in Tahoe. I just saw the episode.
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #75 on: 08-21-2002 21:28 »

Ahahaha! I love it when Homer says "Fiddle-dee-dee, that will require a tetness shot, I'm not going to swear, but I am going to Kick This Dog House In!" and later on: "Three simple words: I am Gay".
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #76 on: 08-22-2002 16:24 »

M O D E L   U. N.
"ORDER AT ANY COST" 

And a pigeon with a machine gun.

Bill Gates: Your Internet ad was brought to my attention, but I can't figure out what, if anything, Compuglobalhypermeganet does, so rather than risk competing with you, I've decided simply to buy you out.
Homer: I reluctantly accept your proposal!
Bill Gates: Well everyone always does. Buy 'em out, boys!
[Gates' lackeys trash the room.]
Homer: Hey, what the hell's going on!
Bill Gates: Oh, I didn't get rich by writing a lot of checks! [insane laughter]
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #77 on: 08-22-2002 16:35 »

[Lucy] Whenever something like that happens, a wizard did it.
[Frink] Ok, but in episode...
[Lucy] Wizard.
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #78 on: 08-22-2002 16:40 »

[Grampa] The Metric System is the tool of the Devil! In my day, we got 4 rods to the Hogs Head and thats the way I likes it![/Grampa]

A funny story about that:
A friend of mine was in my math class and that was our running joke. One day during measuring and geometry, I stood up and shouted the above. My friend laughed until he fell out of his seat and we both got kicked out.
diagnostic

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #79 on: 08-22-2002 17:24 »

Moderator: Okay, How many of you kids would like Itchy and Scratchy to deal with real-life problems, like the ones you face every day?

All Kids: Me!/I would!

Moderator: And who would like to see the total opposite, getting into far-out situations involving robots and magic powers?

All Kids: Me!/I would!

Moderator: So, you want a realistic, down-to-earth show thats completely off the wall and swarming with magic robots?
Pages: 1 [2] 3 4 Print 
« previous next »
Jump to:  

Powered by SMF | SMF © 2006, Simple Machines | some icons from famfamfam
Legal Notice & Disclaimer: "Futurama" TM and copyright FOX, its related entities and the Curiosity Company. All rights reserved. Any reproduction, duplication or distribution of these materials in any form is expressly prohibited. As a fan site, this Futurama forum, its operators, and any content on the site relating to "Futurama" are not explicitely authorized by Fox or the Curiosity Company.
Page created in 0.168 seconds with 18 queries.