Brief thoughts on a bunch of movies I've seen over the past month or two:
Cinema:
Men In Black 3I am in agreement with Coldy that this was far better that the second film, mainly because I can't really remember what happened in that one. The ending was sweet, I wasn't expecting that since usually these days movies are stupid. So that was neat. And Boris. My goodness, I had forgotten entirely that Jemaine was playing him, what a good jerb. And the young Agent K really did seem like a young Agent K. I think it worked well with some of the feeling of the first movie while having it's own..existence. I had a nice nostalgia trip at the beginning of the film remembering seeing the first one at the cinema when I was 11. Maybe if they ever make a Ghostbusters 3 some older people can experience something like that.
PrometheusColdy made me sit through the 3 Alien movies last year, and while the first one felt kind of boring and drawn out to me, I did appreciate the whole..thing. This movie was basically the story of a new (or old) Ripley with some kind of accent who performs her own abortion and is the sole survivor of alien births/attacks apart from an android who really has had a tough life with people ignoring his non-existent feelings and such. I don't know why he didn't kill everyone, although he did infect that dude so he could end up with his girlfriend (I'm assuming that was the motivation). I lol'ed when his head got pulled off though. That's the cool thing about being a robot, you can survive decapitation. Should I have spoilered any of that? It's not like anybody who wanted to see the movie hasn't seen it already, right?
Home:
8MMOh hai Nicolas Cage. Oh hai Joaquin Phoenix.
Joaquin Phoenix? You look..well.
This movie had murders and porn and guns and stuff. Er, snuff. It was kind of creepy, I felt sleazy watching it. Poor old lady at the end, that's what you get for marrying a rich pervert I guess.
21 Jump StreetThis was far more amusing that I had expected having heard bad reviews of it. But I had a few audible laugh moments, and the cameos I wasn't expecting at all so that was extra fun. Also I keep forgetting James Franco has a little brother. He looks like the sleazy nasty bully version of him. It's freaky. Aside from that, I could stomach watching this again. Even if it was just for Jonah Hill's Slim Shady.
Alien Vs. PredatorI quite liked this one. So much Alien-ness lately. But this was good. I wanted the predator and the woman (hey look it's Ripley again
) to hook up or something, so maybe they can do a spin-off movie of her raising a young predator-human thing?
Alien Vs. Predator RequiemI get the whole "ohh we made a Predalien it's gonna getcha!" thing but...come on. So it can make babies and that makes it really tough to get rid of. Why does it seem to only be able to make babies with female humans? I mean, the alien aliens can jump onto anybody's face and BAM, alien. So why can't the Predalien guy facefuck men? Is he a homophobe? There is no need for the person to have ovaries or anything, the babies come out of the stomach, not a vagina, and they're not getting extra DNA from human eggs. PLEASE EXPLAIN.
ArthurI assumed this would be lame. And it was. But dammit, Helen Mirren dying was sad.
CandymanTony Todd being young and ominous. The woman in it looked like she should be related to Gillian Anderson. Anyway, that was...a movie.
ClueI love you, Tim Curry.
Colo(u)r of NightI love
you, Bruce Willis.
Escape From New YorkI have no strong feelings one way or the other, Kurt Russell.
Final Destination 5The only thing I really enjoyed about this was how it tied into the first movie, which was the only one of these films I saw properly. I wasn't expecting that, and I like when films surprise me. SURPRISE!
* Maz walks through a hall of swinging knives, has a brain aneurysm
Fire in the SkyHahahaha, Robert Patrick was young once.
GamerMichael C. Hall, you're fucking creepy looking. Stop it.
GoldenEyeGuns. Women. Really loud guns. Judy Dench. Some stuff happens. The End.
HeathersThis went super psycho super fast. I don't even... I guess it was funny or something?
Heavenly CreaturesLESBIANS! So that's where the woman on Two & a Half Men and Ever After originated! New Zealand! I like her even more now. Kate Winslet's British accent got old fast. This movie is like what my life would have been like as a teenager had I been a lesbian and psychotic.
Jacob's LadderI can't even remember how this ended, I lost interest part way through and just kind of yelled out 'boobies' when necessary.
John CarterI'm
boorrred. I couldn't help thinking it was Prince of Persia, all the desertness. I didn't feel like I was on Mars despite the funky alien creatures. The only thing I liked in this movie was the dog-type thing.
Meet the RobinsonsI always wanted to see this but never did until recently. Really quite sweet and fun. Inventions! Weee! I quite enjoyed this as an animated film that was made beyond my childhood years. Although they do tend to make them for adults now anyway.
MimicI felt like I'd seen this before somehow. I hadn't seen this exact film before but I've seen a whole bunch of movies that could make this one. Interesting to see 'Romy' as a serious character. How do I know
you're not a cockroach? I don't know what I thought would happen in this film, I guess maybe I thought the bugs would be all "mummy (mommy) we're here we love you but we're going to kill everyone around you" But then her husband ended up surviving. What the hell was that?
Mystery MenAlready saw this in the cinema and a couple of years later on dvd or TV, but it's still good. I don't know why it didn't seem to be very popular? Maybe because that Smash Mouth song was overplayed and everyone just associated the two? Hrmm.
Predator 2What's the deal with Jamaican gangs? Are they actually a thing? I always thought of Jamaican's as easy-going and having comedic valuable, as per Cool Runnings.
Stephen King's ItHOW LONG WAS THIS MOVIE. But at least now I can appreciate references to it. I forgot it had mentioned Seth Green in the credits until ages through the movie and I realised the geeky redhead was him. His balls hadn't dropped yet, otherwise I would have recognised his voice. Anyway... That was crazy. I mean, it started off with that little girl getting killed and I thought okay that's cool, but then all of a sudden we're flung back into the past by some random cop, and his child-self doesn't even show up for half the movie to the point where you're like "hang on, how does he know about all these happenings - oh wait, here he is now, just before they go after the clown. So he just wants us all to know HE WAS THERE EVENTUALLY AND HE HELPED A LITTLE." I know it's based on a book, but I haven't read that book. Is this how the book goes? Because I think the film would have been more fun if it just continued as one of those slasher films where everyone gets knocked off until the group of kids figure out how to get rid of the clown, and then at the end the clown is back ready to kill again. But yay, Tim Curry.
Super Mario BrothersThis was fucking awesome. I'm serious.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles This too. Fuck you.
The ThingColdy made me watch the re-make a few months ago, and
then he realised that was essentially a prequel to this, so I was over it before it began. Poor doggies. I want a doggy.
This is Spinal TapHahahaha, Michael McKean was young once.
WillowColdy made me watch this so he could have a nostalgia boner. I'd never heard of it before. It was okay. Also;
Hahahaha, Val Kilmer was young once.