I Don't Read the Reviews, The Reviews Read Me!

[Reply #440 on:]

I Love You, Man

Paul Rudd is so dreamy. That movie was totally awesome. There need to be more bromance movies like this. I love this era of raunchy comedies. I guess when it comes to romance, I prefer men who say 'fuck' every other time than Dermot Mulroney and his apparentl attractiveness...

Must Love Dogs

...I had a point in bringing him up.

God this movie was so freaking boring. It's like every other generic rom-'com' that I've seen. What a fucking snore-fest.

F-Balls

The First half of Monsters vs. Aliens

My friend and I had time to kill after I Love You Man so we went and snuck in here. It's cute but the plot was moving really fast. I don't know, I want to see the rest of it. What made me mad was that there were these great Sci-fi references to Red Dwarf and Leonard Nimoy and no one in the audience got it. Stupid people.

ILYM: A MVA: B-

[Reply #441 on:]

Monsters vs. Aliens 3D

I think this was one of the worse dreamworks animated made yet. The people in it I didn't really care for. Acting,animation,3D and jokes were weak.

I think Bob was the best thing in the whole movie because he loved Derek.

D+

[Reply #442 on:]

I want to see that

I watched Zack and Miri Make a Porno on DVD. I thought it was good and I have got a crush on Seth Rogen

[Reply #443 on:]

This is my list so far of movies watched in 2009...I'm far behind.

Rollerball 5.5
La Confidential 7
Christmas on Mars 6
*happy go Lucky 6.5
Wild Green yonder 8.5
28 Days Later 10
28 Weeks Later 6.5
Wall E 10
*Frost/Nixon 8
Doloris Clayborne 8
Monster 9
Singin in the Rain - unfinished
The Adventures of Baron Munchausen  7
The English Patient 5
*Fight Club 11
The Birds 8.5
Idiocracy 9.5
Burn After Reading 7.5
Breathless 8
*
War Dance 9
Murder on a Sunday Morning 9
Red Planet 6
Grizzly Man 9.5
4 Months 3 Weeks 2 Days 6
Rashomon 9
Brokeback Mountain 8.5
Tropic Thunder 6.5
Hellboy II 7
Children Underground 8
*Coraline 9
Atanarjuat 5
Titanic 9.5
Australia 7
Royal Tenenbaums 9.5/10
Rogue 7.5
Back to the Future I 9
Back to the Future II 8
Back to the Future III 8.5
*Clockwork Orange 8
The Killing of America 9.5
Bender's Game 4
Dead Ringers 7.5
*
The Savages 9
Bender's Game commertary 4
Soldier's Girl 9
Milk 9.5
Glory at Sea (short) 10
La Cravat (short) 8
The Edge of Heaven 7.5
The Thin Red Line 9.5
Oldboy 10
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
The Good The Bad And The Ugly 9.5
On The Waterfront - 8.5
Doubt 8
Lilo and Stitich 8
*Watchmen 9.2
Star Wars 7.5
In Cold Blood- 8
The Boy In The Striped Pajamas 8.5
*Slumdog Millionaire (2nd) 8
Vicky Christina Barcelona7
Speed Racer 8.5
Angelas Ashes 8.5

[Reply #444 on:]

I have no idea how many movies I've watched this year. Even the ones I watched at the cinema are hard to recall. I saw marley & me, I saw watchmen...I swear I saw others...um, I saw madagascar 2...hmm.

[Reply #445 on:]

This is my list on movies that I've seen so far this year. I'm not as far behind as Books, but still far behind. But since Easter break is coming up there will be no problem fixing that.

Edit: * means I saw it in the cinema.
x means I've seen it before.

*Australia (2008)
*Transporter 3 (2008)
Letters from Iwo Jima (2006)
XBender's Game (2008)
A Clockwork Orange (1971)

Pan's Labyrinth (2006)
Saw III (2006)
XThe Incredible Hulk (2008)
Rescue Dawn (2006)
Empire of the Sun (1987)

Star Wreck: In the Pirkinning (2005)
Ju-on 2(The Grudge 2) (2003)
Baby Mama (2008)
The Pursuit of Happyness (2006)
xSpider-Man (2002)

Reservoir Dogs (1992)
Babel (2006)
Christine (1983)
XSunshine (2007)
The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie (2004)

XHarry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005)
The Messengers (2007)
Inkheart (2008)
The Prince & Me (2004)
The Pianist (2002)

Payback (1999)
Alien: Resurrection (1997)
Brokeback Mountain (2005)
American Psycho (2000)
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008)

Whisper (2007)
The Meaning of Life (1983)
Becoming Jane (2007)
Reign of Fire (2002)
Slumdog Millionaire (2008)

The House Bunny (2008)
*Valkyrie (2008)
xMen in Black II (2002)
Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (2004)
Sphere (1998)

U.S. Marshals (1998)
A Walk to Remember (2002)
The Kite Runner (2007)
Deep Rising(2008)
xHarry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007)

Bratz: The Movie (2007)
xSky Captain and the World of Tomorrow (2004)
A Scanner Darkly (2006)
Good Will Hunting (1997)
The Reader (2008)

Surf's Up (2007)
Moulin Rouge! (2001)
Forrest Gump (1994)
United 93 (2006)
Erin Brockovich (2000)

2010 (1984)
*Marley & Me (2008)
*He's just not that into you (2009)
Trainspotting (1996)
Into the Wild Green Yonder (2009)

Memento (2000)
The Hunt for Red October (1990)
Children Underground (2001)
xCOMInto the Wild Green Yonder (2009)
xToy Story (1995)

xThe Incredibles (2004)
xFight Club (1999)
Watchmen (2009)
Fanboys (2008)
xJurassic Park (1993)

xTrainspotting (1996)
xRun, Fatboy, Run (2008)
Jurassic Park II (1997)

[Reply #446 on:]

Lists are boring and are not reviews, no one reads them! (your noob buddies don't count!)

Yes Man
Hmm, I watched this yesterday or the day before but I can't remember any specific funny bits in it... Ooh Rhys Darby was good, Carrey was goofy and smackable as usual and Zooooey Deschchanchalel has the cute quirky girl thing down, but I think the best bit was the suicide guy musical number (Luis Guzmán is awesome).

C

Young People Fucking
Story of the lovemaking naughty sexy-time told from the perspective of 5 different couples of people, and broken into 6 stages (Prelude, Foreplay, Sex, Interlude, Orgasm, Afterglow):
The couples are The Roommates, The Friends, The Couple, The First Date, and The Exes (last two storylines are the weakest or least funny in my opinion)

I liked it, quite funny, very simply done.
Hotties to watch for: Carly Pope and Diora Baird.

A-

[Reply #447 on:]

One-Sentence Movie Reviews

Diamonds Are Forever
The worst Connery Bond, playing out more like a slightly unfunny episode of Get Smart.

TMNT
The wonders of computer animation has enabled the much-loved Ninja Turtles to become sterile and disconnected, with a yawn-worthy supernatural plot and none of the zing present in the first movie.

Deliverance
A chilling and revealing documentary about typical American society.

Babylon AD
I was riveted... by indifference. 

Death Race
It must be so hard for Jason Stratham, having to play the exact same character in every movie he appears in.

Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country
Still beats TWoK as my favorite Trek movie because of the nifty Cold War parallels and multi-faceted story that drifts from a whodunnit to a political thriller, prison break, and space opera.

The Death and Life of Bobby Z
Paul Walker is a complete and utter cock once again.

Appleseed: Ex Machina
Generic plot elements and poorly-handled angsty bits make this not as good as the first one, which wasn't as good as the original OVA, which wasn't as good as the manga.

V for Vendetta
Kinda makes you wanna rebel against something, don't it? 

Dead Leaves
...W...WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?! 

Ruins
A rather creepy film which kind of justifies the enjoyable human pastime of destroying plant life everywhere.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Only a very daring filmmaker or a lonely teenage fangirl would inject this much domestic drama into characters who are essentially ridiculous-looking rubber suit monsters. 

[Reply #448 on:]

TMNT
The wonders of computer animation has enabled the much-loved Ninja Turtles to become sterile and disconnected, with a yawn-worthy supernatural plot and none of the zing present in the first movie.

Not as bad as the new cartoon, I saw a glimpse of it yesterday and I didn't know wtf was going on but I think CyberMechaShredder was chasing the turtles through the Matrix on their Tron buggies...

[Reply #449 on:]

The Boat That Rocked

It was brilliant. Rhys Ifans puts on a really sexy DJ voice mmm Nick Frost and Chris O'Dowd are  so adorable cute. I think Bill Nighty is cool. The movie has a good soundtrack and something like a Titanic ending. Don't like Kenneth Branagh in it though.

[Reply #450 on:]

Not as bad as the new cartoon, I saw a glimpse of it yesterday and I didn't know wtf was going on but I think CyberMechaShredder was chasing the turtles through the Matrix on their Tron buggies...

Good grief...

[Reply #451 on:]

The Midnight Meat Cake Train

Much better than what I expected it to be. This movie was really gross but it was CGI. The story was good. Makes me want to get some meat.

B

[Reply #452 on:]

Zero Effect
Bill Pullman as a noir-type super private investigator recluse Daryl Zero (think Dirk Gently without the hat and overcoat) and Ben Stiller as his assistant try to solve the case of the missing car keys (the client doesn't reveal all of course!)

Guest starring Cassidy from Lost.

Bill and Ben and Lost chick were great in this, not your standard clichéd crap, darkly humorous at times, Bill was great as the recluse PI.

"I'll shoot you. Really, I will. I have a gun and everything. "

B+

[Reply #453 on:]

That sounds really good. I'll have to keep an eye open for it.

[Reply #454 on:]

I Love You Man

More Romantic than Comedy and the romance I'm referring to is between the dudes. To be fair I don't think I fall into the target audience.

C

Observe and Report

Not my favorite Seth Rogen movie but it was funny as hell.  Anna Farris was a hilarious mess and there were so many entertaining beat downs.

B+

[Reply #455 on:]

Valkyrie

Surprisingly good despite Tom Cruise. Pretty well paced and interesting the whole way through. The only thing that detracted from it was that I already knew the ending.

[Reply #456 on:]

Valkyrie
The only thing that detracted from it was that I already knew the ending.

Well don't tell. Some of us like to be surprised.
Titanic was ruined for me when a loudmouth let slip that the boat sank.

[Reply #457 on:]

Valkyrie
The only thing that detracted from it was that I already knew the ending.

Well don't tell. Some of us like to be surprised.
Titanic was ruined for me when a loudmouth let slip that the boat sank.

Not the part where Hitler survives. I was talking about everything else that happens at the end of the movie. I'm not a complete idiot......at least not every day.

[Reply #458 on:]

Monsters vs. Aliens
I know I am not the first, but hey, what you want from me?

It's one of those films, that are decent enough to watch, and you wouldn't mind re-watching it, but you don't find yourself too eager enough to actually purchase it.  I think its biggest problem is that 3-D part of it overshadows its actual content, which I think partly a lot of it is brilliant, a favourite part of mine reminds every scene with the president, voiced by Stephen Colbert.

The film, in my mind, proves why 3-D films will rise and fall in the coming years.  The 3-D first of all draws attention away from plot, I realise that special effects have done this for years, but the point is, 3-D will remain similar, at first the experience is cool, then the second time and perhaps a third time.  But that would be it.  Errr, well, to some.  The point is, the 3-D craze will die out, especially considering that a lot of people prefer the more subtle 2D versions, which is by the way, the version I watched.

The film is decent, but it is certainly not DreamWorks' finest hour.

My opinion of this film may also have something to do with my macrophilia fetish.

[Reply #459 on:]

A History Of Violence
I watched half of this ages ago and watched it again in full tonight, good film, didn't really expect the ending and I thought Ed Harris would be in it some more, but still pretty badass at times without him!
The bully guy deserved it, I lol'd
Viggo Mortenson needs to kick ass more often.

"For Frodo!" *breaks guys arm*

A-

[Reply #460 on:]

The Sweet Hereafter:

Awesome filmmaking, top notch everything. I really felt it. (Bye the way it's a Canadian film)

9/10

[Reply #461 on:]

There was a movie on tv called Little Manhattan today. I watched it because I am bored. It was alright, just nice to watch once, when you are bored. It had Josh Hutcherson in it and New York. New York is just too awesome.

[Reply #462 on:]

Blood Simple
Damn Cohen brothers sure know how to drag out a story, and scenes drag on in silence to build tension, one of their earlier films and it kinda shows in the quality compared to todays (well it came out the year after I was born!)
About a wife who has an affair and her husband isn't too happy about it, it all goes wrong, their later film The Man Who Wasn't There is similar stuff, if I remember correctly.
Oh and I liked the camera shot going along the bar and then over the passed out drunk guys head, "scuse me!"

B

[Reply #463 on:]

I saw about the last half hour or so of that on TV once; it was pretty intense.

Otherwise only seen Fargo and Raising Arizona I think...

[Reply #464 on:]

Star Trek

The event:

The Opera House makes for a kick-ass place to watch a movie. Walked up the hundreds of stairs, along possibly the longest red carpet ever, past hundreds of other peoples' adoring fans. Inside, they'd spared no expense - there were Star Fleet logos painted, projected and bolted to everything. Played spot-the-D-list Australian celebrity - which I sucked at. I only saw Hamish & Andy and the Triple J film guy... We then got led into the Concert Hall which had been bisected by the huge screen, with a little stage area left in front. JJ and the cast got up and said a few words before the start - he's quite short in real life. Overall, a really fun experience.

The film:

I liked it.

First up, this isn't a reboot in the same vein as Batman Begins or Casino Royale. In fact, it could be argued that it's not even a reboot at all (everything's explained rather convincingly throughout the film). It's more a of a hybrid - part reboot, part sequel, part loving, po-mo, self-referential homage.

I don't count myself as a Trek fan - I haven't seen any of the original series or films, and I've watched perhaps a handful of Next Generation and Deep Space 9 episodes late at night when I was drunk, stoned or both. The only films I'd seen up until now were Generations and First Contact, which I thought were pretty meh. So pretty much my entire remedial knowledge of Star Trek comes from a patchwork of pop culture references and wikipedia-skimming. That said, I knew enough to get most of the obvious in-jokes and references in this new film (and they're all there), so it played well to me.

The acting is as good as you're going to find in this sort of thing, with the exception of Leonard Nimoy, who hams it up something terrible. The action sequences are done well - including the bizarre Cloverfield-meets-Jurassic Park moment on Hoth the snow planet near Vulcan. The CG is about par for the course these days and nothing you haven't seen done elsewhere before.

The story is solid, the cold opening is probably the strongest part of the movie, and the plot is serviceable for a sci-fi film. The pacing is frenetic, and there's a lot squeezed into two hours of film. On one hand, at the end you feel like you've been on a rollickingly fun, action-packed romp, but at the same time the story is being pushed along much to quickly for any meaningful drama or tension to build. You never feel like the good guys aren't going to get away/win. There's a distinct lack of seriousness in everything bar the first 15 minutes. Eric Bana's Nero does some pretty horrendous things,

Show spoiler

destroying Alderaan Vulcan, torturing Morpheus Captain Pike for the codes to Zion Earth's defensive systems, etc,

but the lack of any tension makes him come off more as a pantomime villain than a genuine baddie. Again, I don't know the source material that well, so this might be entirely in fitting with the style of the show, but I found it made for a shallower experience than perhaps was warranted, given the darker overtones set up at the beginning.

That said, if you go in not taking the whole thing too seriously, it's a very fun and entertaining film. As I said, there are loads of 'nudge-nudge-wink-wink' references to the original series and its characters - in fact, a lot of it in the same vein as the Futurama episode. There are some genuinely funny bits too.

So all in all, it's a fun, emotionally untaxing way to spend a couple of hours in the cinema. I think it will play well with the fans, as long as they don't go in expecting an über-serious, gritty re-imagining of the material, the likes of which we've been inundated with recently.

Oh, and it's a hell of a lot better than the Star Wars prequels, so chalk one up for the Trek camp in that regard.

[Reply #465 on:]

Thanks Ben.
You've taken a load off my mind; it sounds good. I won't read your spoiler bit because this is one movie I actually want to be surprised by.

[Reply #466 on:]

I started the life series. I put on the first episode of The Living Planet. It's a lot about volcanoes and it had Iceland in it

[Reply #467 on:]

Four Brothers
Ah Mark Wahlberg, typecast as a tough street guy, this time with his three "brothers" (all adopted by the same kind old lady-mom) goes out for revenge when said mom is killed in mysterious circumstances.
It's a decent action movie with some good, if not clichéd, scenes, I liked the car chase, add some crooked cops and cheesy 70s blacksploitation gangstas (The Operative from Firefly, woo!) and a cool Detroit motown soundtrack and bam!

B-

[Reply #468 on:]

Let the right one in

Now this is a vampire movie.  Fuck Twilight.  Be sure you stick around for the "Oh, I get it!"  Ending.

A

Edit: Oh, OF COURSE we're going to re-make it over here in the USA, because god knows whenever an original foreign horror gem is made with brilliant subtlety and inventive characters, we have to do it right: with fireworks and cliches.  Dammit.

[Reply #469 on:]

I heard they already changed all the subtitle lines for the US DVD.

[Reply #470 on:]

Yay! LtROI! I ranted about this movie months ago, both in love and hate that it's getting remade. My favourite movie since Children of Men in 2006. Probably the most real and genuine love story I've ever seen. And faze, there was a big controversy about that, they've changed the normal DVD subtitles to the "theatrical" subs, check the back of the box.

[Reply #471 on:]

I saw Knowing last night.
I'm really conflicted on how to rate or describe this movie, there are certain elements of it that are good, and other aspects that are silly. It certainly walks that line. Some of the science aggrivated me, and that almost NEVER happens to me (such as the computer shot where all the planets were LINED UP STRAIGHT) Didn't anybody watch Bill Nye? That's some Magic School Bus logic right there. Anyway, it starts really strong, comes back for a questionable last 3rd, and redeems itself with a great last 2 minutes, and amazing ending shot. Oh, and some parts had embarrassingly awful corny dialogue and predictable moments.
Even though there's a lot of critisism here, I can't help not liking it. It's a fun movie, and brave, you're not supposed to get away with some of the scenes in here in hollywood.

IN conclusion, Knowing was a rollercoaster of quality, or perhaps a venn-diagram, with the juicy centre buried, and you have to dig to find it.

7 or 8 out of 10 overall. 9 for certain parts, and 5 for others.

[Reply #472 on:]

Dead Leaves
...W...WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?! 

HAHA, that ..... what ever it was is all sorts of fucked up.

I have some reviews coming out soon.

[Reply #473 on:]

W.
Average man, bad president, average film.

C student!

[Reply #474 on:]

The Fall

First Blu Ray ever watched. Woo! Pretty as a...better not say, but suffice to say it looks awesome. The movie itself was pretty good. I just wish BDs weren't so gorram expensive as hell.

[Reply #475 on:]

Pretty as an Irish taint?

[Reply #476 on:]

17 Again

I know what you're thinking, but my friend is one of those "I heart Zac Efron" girls, and as her friend I was forced to see it. But it was actually a pretty good movie, it was funny and overall it was a good movie.

7/10

The Boat That Rocked

Great movie. Loved it. It was definetely swick worthy
I would watch it again.

10/10

[Reply #477 on:]

17 Again

I know what you're thinking, but my friend is one of those "I heart Zac Efron" girls, and as her friend I was forced to see it. But it was actually a pretty good movie, it was funny and overall it was a good movie.

7/10

QFT.

[Reply #478 on:]

Ok Bianca's a young girl, why did you go to see it?!

[Reply #479 on:]

...same reason as she did...