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Author Topic: The "I hate reality shows so much it hurts sometimes"-thread  (Read 643 times)
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chay´s head

Space Pope
« Reply #40 on: 06-07-2005 08:14 »
« Last Edit on: 06-07-2005 08:14 »

Originally posted by dr.bender nye:
I hate reality shows.There as worse as Drama to me.Now comedy is the best.Without it,there would be no Futurama thats funny,Freinds without its canned/real lauhter (i think its real)Simpsons with less awards cause there's less "comic".Comedy is worth living,DONT waste it.

....ah, its so much clearer now...

all my interest in TV has dropped now, the only thing i watched was LOST, but then i got all the torrents, and now i'v seen it all, so i don't really watch any TV now.

Also NYE, from what i think you were talking about in, for shows like friends, they do it in front of audience, so most ofthe laughter is real, but something may be funnier or less funnier than they intended, so they can cut short or extend the laughter.

Starship Captain
« Reply #41 on: 06-09-2005 18:38 »

The only reality shows I've ever watched were:
Last Comic Standing (1st season)
Surreal Life (The seasons with Vanilla Ice and Chyna)

I'll probably watch the upcoming MTV reality show The 70's House, it sounds like an interesting premise.

Space Pope
« Reply #42 on: 06-09-2005 18:58 »
« Last Edit on: 06-09-2005 18:58 »

So, I was sitting around twiddling my thumbs (which is probably what all reality show creators are doing as a "brilliant" idea suddenly hits them), and I came up with an excellent idea for a reality show that's a little bit more high-brow than what we're being offered nowadays. Enjoy...


(Scene: A wrestling ring. Pamela Anderson is walking around, pondering. Thoughtful music accompanies the scene.)

Anderson: You know, reality TV will never die. It's like Socrates said. "Only the good die young".

(Just then, Carmen Electra steps into the ring. She looks pretty mad.)

Electra: That wasn't Socrates, you whore!

Anderson: Oh yeah? Wanna bet, slut?

Electra: Bring it on!

(The two start fighting and yelling at each other like subliterate baboons. Just then, some hot guy walks into the ring, and breaks the two apart.)

Some Hot Guy: Ladies, ladies, ladies. You're being so childish about this. I mean, we all know that it was Aristotle who said it, so what's the use in fighting?

Anderson: It was not Aristotle, you moron!

Electra: Yeah! You think that we don't know our ancient philosophers?!

Some Hot Guy: Well, not really.

Anderson & Electra: Let's get 'im!

(Anderson and Electra start pounding on the hot guy. Just then, an announcer's voice can be heard.)

Announcer (v.o.): If you think throwing all of your self-respect out the window is entertaining, then you'll love this show! Watch tonight as two gorgeous women and one very attractive man-child battle it out in a contest of wits and fists on...Philosophy...Of the Fight!


Hollywood, here I come!

Seriously, did I mention I hate these shows yet?

Space Pope
« Reply #43 on: 06-09-2005 22:39 »

Gorky, you are by far a genius. I know you dislike reality TV but you could really make some stupid shows.  tongue

DOOP Secretary
« Reply #44 on: 06-10-2005 10:52 »

While browsing the local Newsagents outside college this morning, I glanced at the major newspapers, The Sun which is the most tabloid had a slightly blurry pictures of one of the female Big Brother contestants wearing nothing but a pair of bikini panties and badly cupping her breasts.

Is that what people would do in a horrible attempt to get on Television? I bet these people would perform acts of Satanistic Bestiality just to co-star is some rubbish program...

Starship Captain
« Reply #45 on: 06-10-2005 11:17 »

The Sun is a "major newspaper"?

Bending Unit
« Reply #46 on: 06-10-2005 12:03 »

^ I've never heard of it, but that dosen't prove a thing.

on topic: You can't sum up all reality shows in one sentance, you know. Some of the new ones, like "the scholar", or "brat camp" look ok. (I can't wait to see the basterds get their asses kicked.) However, some like "I want to be a Hilton" or this new one where an old rocker goes to college, look awful. It sounds like a B movie. I also hate all face-grinder shows. Every contestant looks better at the start of the show than at the end. One lady on "the swan" looked like her nose was going to FALL OFF.

Somewhat related, I want to do a reality movie. I'd take 5 people and lock them in this old abadoned barn on an island, or maybe my freind's basement that has a toilet, and tell them that they can leave any time they want, but if they do they loose the chance at the prize money. (I'm hoping for $1000, posably from local businesses in exchange for an ad) There is no furniture, no tv, no radios, nothing. They are only alowed to bring in the clothes on their backs. Sanitation is beond basic, I bring over a modest meal 3 times a day so they don't starve. If they want to leave, they can call me on a walkie-talkie. But here's the best part. No one is voted off. There are no contests or goals or chanlages. There are no teams. It's all self imposed. They just sit in a small room together with nothing to look at or talk about or think about or listen to or read or play or watch or see or DO until finally they all go stark raving mad.  evil laugh It's all taped. And if the money is enough, they could be there for months. It's going to be called "Cabin Fever".

If you think I'm joking, I'm dead serious. Even about the island.

And if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. --Groucho Marx.

DOOP Secretary
« Reply #47 on: 06-10-2005 12:04 »

Hahaha, they wish. I mean major in a popularity sense, of course The Suns is just as a newspaper as the porno mags on the top shelf.
Starship Captain
« Reply #48 on: 06-10-2005 22:07 »
« Last Edit on: 06-10-2005 22:07 »

I have an idea too. We take some loser off the streets, give him some shotguns and a mask, and tell him he has to rob a bank. If he's successful, he get's to keep the money he stole, and one million dollars. If he fails, he's put to death.

Originally posted by kiffan:
One lady on "The Swan" looked like her nose was going to FALL OFF.

Are you sure it wasn't Michael Jackson?

Did anyone ever see the MADtv sketch, where we find out that the creater of all those reality shows is really just some homeless guy who lives in an alley behind NBC? (Played by Christopher Titus.)
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