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Author Topic: The Professors Biography.  (Read 12921 times)
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Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« on: 01-16-2004 14:53 »

What you need to know:

The Professor is about 164 years old, it’s hard to tell since he’s been youth-a-sized and then dipped in “The Fountain of Aging”. But he was born in April 9th 2841 so he’s been alive for 164 years. He should be lying in some sort of stasis at the “Near-deathstar” but he got rescued and they didn’t bother coming for him again.

The Professors full name is Hubert J Farnsworth. His employees call him Professor and his great x30 something Uncle calls him Nephew.

Hubert owns the Planet Express Delivery Company but he also works as a Professor at Mars University where he teaches “The science of quantum neutrino fields”. He of course made up the title so no student would dare take the class. Professors can’t teach.

The Professor spends most of his time inventing since he has a democrat managing his delivery company.


Interesting facts:

He was born in New New York’s nerdiest slum “Hells Laboratory”.
He made the first robot able to qualify for a boat loan.
His arch nemesis is named Wernstrum. Wernstrum is 40 years younger.
He sympathises with the opinions of the “National Ray-Gun” party.
He has had 4 – 5 heart surgeries.
His favourite artist is Picasso.

Past:

Young Hubert learned to read while he was still in diapers, at age 8. He then blossomed into a greasy teenage nerd. After 14 years of Graduate School he got a job at Moms Friendly Robot Company. He and Mom fell in love and then after some time, short or long is unknown, they broke up. We don’t know for how long he has taught at Mars University but we do know it has been for at least 99 years. In the episode “A Head in the Polls” we learn that Hubert has been a prostitute or using his own words “Sold your body? Oh Bender I’ve been down that road.” He’s supposed to have quit after spending all of his money on skin tight pants.

While at Moms he built the first “sporty robot” by sacrificing fuel-efficiency.

Psychological Evaluation:

The Professor suffers from chronic madness, a disease that is supposed to run in his family. It hasn’t Affected Fry yet though. He’s a kind and gentle man who sometimes can be cruel and forgetful. He seems easy to be around and he’s not affected by the 20th century’s notion of modesty. He’s a man who does what he feels like when he feels like it.

What he has been up to since we first met him:

-   Saved the City of New New York from a big ball of garbage.
-   Rode on the Titanics maiden voyage.
-   Inventing
-   Helped save the Earth from destruction by appearing in an episode of “Single female lawyer”
-   Toured the Slurm Factory on the planet Wormulon.
-   Employed 25 star general WeeBelo Zapp Brannigan.
-   Gotten registered to vote.
-   Fought Santa Claus.
-   Cloned him self. The clone got the name Cubert.
-   Discovered the lost underwater city of Atlanta.
-   Had sex with Corporate billionaire Mom
-   Went on a fantastic voyage inside his Uncles body.
-   Visited Mars on Mars day.
-   Saved the Universe from time skips. Assisted by Ethan Bubblegum Tate.
-   Went back in time to the year 1947 and crash landed in Roswell, New Mexico.
-   Lost the Company and then got it back from his Uncle Fry.
-   Started the Bender protest group F.A.R.T or Fathers against rude Television.
-   Saved Earth from Global warming by moving it further from the Sun.
-   Gotten Youth-a-Sized: Reversed through his life.
-   Performed a Robot sexchange on Bender.
-   Created multiple paralell universes.

- End Biography -

Add everything that I have missed, comment if you think I'm at fault, add to his psychological profile and give me your input.

I will then using your comments and input edit this text to give us the best profile of The Professor.
John C
Starship Captain
****
« Reply #1 on: 01-16-2004 15:16 »

Nice, nice stuff Xmpel. I don't see any errors, but I haven't really picked it over.
David A

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #2 on: 01-16-2004 16:35 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Xmpel:
Hubert owns the Planet Express Delivery Company but he also works as a Professor at Mars University where he teaches “The science of quantum neutrino fields”.

I thought it was "The mathematics of quantum neutrino fields”.

 
Quote
The Professor spends most of his time inventing since he has a democrat managing his delivery company.

No, he has a bureaucrat managing his delivery company.  If he had a democrat managing his delivery company he would spend most of his time paying taxes.

 
Quote
He sympathises with the opinions of the “National Ray-Gun” party.

It's the National Ray-Gun Association.

 
Quote
-   Employed 25 star general WeeBelo Zapp Brannigan.

It's WEBELO, as any Scout could tell you.

 
Quote
-   Created multiple paralell universes.

You misspelled parallel.

Otherwise, It looks pretty good.  Nice work.

Speak softly. Drive a Sherman tank.
boingo2000

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #3 on: 01-16-2004 17:33 »
« Last Edit on: 01-16-2004 17:33 »

You should add that the professor is believed to suffer (or at least to have suffered in the past) from a disease known as "Wandering Bladder."
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #4 on: 01-16-2004 18:06 »

He spend his 300$ tax rebate on a stem cells.

He paid Bender 499 dollar and 100 cent to illegally dispose of highly toxic waste, rather than paying the mandatory bribe of 500$.

Has a strange obsession with dolomite.

Have send several delivery crews to their deaths.

Does Farnsworth actually own Planet Express? I mean it's traded ont he stock exchange and the employees control at least 49% as of "Futurestock", maybe more since.
VoVat

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #5 on: 01-16-2004 20:47 »

I guess we can't be totally sure how corporations operate in the future, but, in "The Route of All Evil," Cubert specifically lays claim to the Professor's building and spaceship, so I suppose Farnsworth owns them, but not the company itself.

Oh, and, to be pedantic about it, Cubert was actually cloned a few years before "Space Pilot 3000," but he didn't do anything until "A Clone of My Own."
M0le

Space Pope
****
« Reply #6 on: 01-16-2004 21:05 »


*Gave A- to Wernstrum


Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #7 on: 01-17-2004 04:26 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by VoVat:
Oh, and, to be pedantic about it, Cubert was actually cloned a few years before "Space Pilot 3000," but he didn't do anything until "A Clone of My Own."

So if I write "Activated" his clone, that would be alright ?
Axl

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #8 on: 01-17-2004 11:03 »

Favourite quote: Good news!
Bushmeister

Professor
*
« Reply #9 on: 01-17-2004 11:45 »

Very nice work indeed Xmpel, a great amalgamation of everything we learn about Farnsworth in the episodes.
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #10 on: 01-17-2004 17:14 »

What more to write in the Medical Profile ?

Medical Evaluation:

Suffers or suffered from a condition known as "Wandering Bladder". Otherwise he looks quite healthy for a 164 year old. The Professor has also cloned himself, the clone seems fine. Of what we have seen of his age reversing he didn’t have any chronic deceases or suffered from obesity. He has had 4 – 5 heart surgeries.

Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #11 on: 01-17-2004 18:42 »

He was dungeon master when he played Dungeons & Dragons wiht his friends.

His angry, crotchety grandpa discount card is expired as of 3003.

You might also like to take a gander at now dead website Good News Everyone (Internet Archive version), maybe they have something we forgot.
Grim

Professor
*
« Reply #12 on: 01-17-2004 19:00 »

Dont forget he breeds Gargoyles and Nuclear Mutants in his spare time.
Marked4Death
Crustacean
*
« Reply #13 on: 01-17-2004 21:26 »

Wow anyone else have any more info that seems like a stockers behavoir they would like to add to this "unique" collection of information?
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #14 on: 01-18-2004 05:01 »

I surely hope so.
Birdbot

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #15 on: 01-18-2004 05:04 »

He's as fit as a 140 year old - A Clone of My Own
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #16 on: 01-18-2004 05:21 »

If someone could add to the "Psychological Profile" that would be great.
Axl

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #17 on: 01-18-2004 06:06 »

"Fast cars. trendy nightclubs, beautiful women - He invented them all!"

: Inventor of fast cars, trendy nightclubs and beautiful women!   big grin
Birdbot

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #18 on: 01-18-2004 06:19 »

He wants to be feared because of his many doomsday devices.
Professie

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #19 on: 01-18-2004 07:52 »

Nice bio Xmpel, exept for those few flaws already pointed out by David.
M0le

Space Pope
****
« Reply #20 on: 01-18-2004 19:58 »

Created a chip that allows robots to feel emotions? And by feel I mean force.   wink
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #21 on: 01-19-2004 02:10 »

That belongs in "Inventions" not in his Biography.
EspanolBot

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #22 on: 01-19-2004 07:14 »

 He caused global warming and has some mysterious "ape" bones in his basement.
Teral

Helpy McHelphelp
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #23 on: 01-19-2004 08:23 »

Can't understand why some people wouldn't want a laser canon grafted onto their chest, to punish those who defy them.

Cube_166

Professor
*
« Reply #24 on: 01-19-2004 13:50 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by M0le:
Created a chip that allows robots to feel emotions? And by feel I mean force.    wink


No... by allow you mean force... I don't think allowing robots to force emotions would be a productive use of his time.
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #25 on: 01-22-2004 19:15 »

A little racist. This might just be towards Signoids but it might stretch further than that.
He was also seen hating Grunka Lunkas.
First impressions seems important to him.

For some reason he helped Fry download a celeberties personality into a robot although he moraly objects to the whole concept of Humans dating robots. Why is this, could it be something mental ?

Medical Profile:
He got horrible beaten by Horrible Gelatinous Blob. This would have killed even me but he survived just fine.

In "Roswell that ends well" noone came up to him and asked how old he really was. Noone even glanced at him more than twice. By this can I draw the conclusion that he might look like he's in his 80s or 90s ?
Iron Chef
Bending Unit
***
« Reply #26 on: 01-22-2004 19:44 »

Is in favour of saving Hitler's brain by placing it in a Great White Shark.
Also seems to be a bit of a megalomaniac when the mood takes him.
boingo2000

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #27 on: 01-23-2004 09:04 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Xmpel:
A little racist. This might just be towards Signoids but it might stretch further than that.
He was also seen hating Grunka Lunkas.

Also not fond of Sweeden, but that could just be because inspiring multi-culturalism angrys up his blood.
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #28 on: 01-23-2004 18:04 »

I'll just write "A little racist" or "Have some racist opinions".
Mouse On Venus

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #29 on: 01-23-2004 18:14 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by boingo2000:
 Also not fond of Sweeden, but that could just be because inspiring multi-culturalism angrys up his blood.

If that's the case, he might see Sweden as a necessary evil, since he buys a super-collider from pi-kea in Less Than Hero.
David A

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #30 on: 01-23-2004 18:21 »

Or maybe <pi>kea is the reason that he hates Sweden.
Mouse On Venus

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #31 on: 01-23-2004 18:40 »

Good point. I forgot that Bend Her came after Less Than Hero.
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #32 on: 01-24-2004 15:32 »
« Last Edit on: 01-24-2004 15:32 »

Has edited everything you told me to and added some of the things you've said. Also added this:

Psychological Evaluation:

For some reason he helped Fry download a celebrities personality into a robot although he morally objects to the whole concept of Humans dating robots. Why did he do it, is he just helpful or does he even stop to think about his actions? Seems like he acts first and thinks later. A little weird since he is a scientist. Mad as he may be. Also seems to be a bit of a megalomaniac when the mood takes him. His Uncle x30 describes him with these exact words: “The Professor is a senile, amoral crackpot.”

He let a coin flip decide whether or not to try and surgically remove his own brain.
In a Parallel Universe where the only difference where that coin flips turned out the opposite of what they do in ours he actually attempted this.

Medical Profile:

He got horribly beaten by Horrible Gelatinous Blob, this would have killed even me but he survived just fine. We see him getting fiercely smashed into and crushing a lamp. He should be dead, is he stronger than your average 160 year old or are everyone his age that strong?

Has also suffered victim to 3 explosions (in WITHW, LTH and TFP) one of which smashed him through a 10 cm or thicker wall made of plaster and then into another wall which he took a rather nasty hit on. Amazingly he survived and all of these without a scratch or having to go to a hospital.
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #33 on: 01-27-2004 11:12 »

Finalized version. This will be the last chance to add or change something !

What you need to know:

The Professor is about 164 years old, it’s hard to tell since he’s been youth-a-sized and then dipped in “The Fountain of Aging”. But he was born in April 9th 2841 so he’s been alive for 164 years. He should be lying in some sort of stasis at the “Near-deathstar” but he got rescued and they didn’t bother coming for him again.

The Professors full name is Hubert J Farnsworth. His employees call him Professor and his great x30 something Uncle calls him Nephew.

Hubert owns the Planet Express Delivery Company but he also works as a Professor at Mars University where he teaches “The mathematics of quantum neutrino fields”. He of course made up the title so no student would dare take the class. Professors can’t teach.

The Professor spends most of his time inventing since he has a bureaucrat managing his delivery company.


Interesting facts:

He was born in New New York’s nerdiest slum “Hells Laboratory”.
He made the first robot able to qualify for a boat loan.
His arch nemesis is named Wernstrum. Wernstrum is 40 years younger.
He sympathises with the opinions of the National Ray-Gun Association.
He has had 4 – 5 heart surgeries.
His favourite artist is Picasso.
Favourite quote: Good news!

Past:

Young Hubert learned to read while he was still in diapers, at age 8. He then blossomed into a greasy teenage nerd. After 14 years of Graduate School he got a job at Moms Friendly Robot Company. He and Mom fell in love and then after some time, short or long is unknown, they broke up. We don’t know for how long he has taught at Mars University but we do know it has been for at least 99 years. In the episode “A Head in the Polls” we learn that Hubert has been a prostitute or using his own words “Sold your body? Oh Bender I’ve been down that road.” He’s supposed to have quit after spending all of his money on skin tight pants. He has sent several delivery crews to their deaths. Last one on a mission to a gigantic beehive.

While at Moms he built the first “sporty robot” by sacrificing fuel-efficiency.
Wanted to put Hitler’s brain in a Great White Shark
. This could have happened from anytime in his past up till the episode “a Clone of My Own”.

Psychological Evaluation:

The Professor suffers from chronic madness, a disease that is supposed to run in his family. It hasn’t affected Fry yet though. He’s a kind and gentle man who sometimes can be cruel and forgetful. He seems easy to be around and he’s not affected by the 20th century’s notion of modesty. He’s a man who does what he feels like when he feels like it. For some reason he helped Fry download a celebrities personality into a robot although he morally objects to the whole concept of Humans dating robots. Why did he do it, is he just helpful or does he even stop to think about his actions? Seems like he acts first and thinks later. A little weird since he is a scientist. Mad as he may be. Also seems to be a bit of a megalomaniac when the mood takes him. His Uncle x30 describes him with these exact words: “The Professor is a senile, amoral crackpot.”

He let a coin flip decide whether or not to try and surgically remove his own brain.
In a Parallel Universe where the only difference where that coin flips turned out the opposite of what they do in ours he actually attempted this.

Medical Evaluation:

Suffers or suffered from a condition known as "Wandering Bladder". Otherwise he looks quite healthy for a 164 year old. The Professor has also cloned himself, the clone seems fine. Of what we have seen of his age reversing he didn’t have any chronic deceases or suffered from obesity. He has had 4 – 5 heart surgeries. He got horribly beaten by Horrible Gelatinous Blob, this would have killed even me but he survived just fine. We see him getting fiercely smashed into and crushing a lamp. He should be dead, is he stronger than your average 160 year old or are everyone his age that strong?

Has also suffered victim to 3 explosions (in WITHW, LTH and TFP) one of which smashed him through a 10 cm or thicker wall made of plaster and then into another wall which he took a rather nasty hit on. Amazingly he survived and all of these without a scratch or having to go to a hospital.

What he has been up to since we first met him:

-   Saved the City of New New York from a big ball of garbage.
-   Rode on the Titanics maiden voyage.
-   Inventing
-   Helped save the Earth from destruction by appearing in an episode of “Single female lawyer”
-   Toured the Slurm Factory on the planet Wormulon.
-   Employed 25 star general WEBELO Zapp Brannigan.
-   Gotten registered to vote.
-   Fought Santa Claus.
-   “Activated” his clone. The clone got the name Cubert.
-   Discovered the lost underwater city of Atlanta.
-   Had sex with Corporate billionaire Mom
-   Went on a fantastic voyage inside his Uncles body.
-   Visited Mars on Mars day.
-   Saved the Universe from time skips. Assisted by Ethan Bubblegum Tate.
-   Went back in time to the year 1947 and crash landed in Roswell, New Mexico.
-   Lost the Company and then got it back from his Uncle Fry.
-   Contaminated the planet with toxic waste and then paid Bender to “Clean it up”.
-   Started the Bender protest group F.A.R.T or Fathers against rude Television.
-   Saved Earth from Global warming by moving it further from the Sun.
-   Gotten Youth-a-Sized: Reversed through his life.
-   Performed a Robot sexchange on Bender.
-   Created multiple parallel universes.
-   Got a $300 tax rebate and spent it all on Stem cells to make him look younger.
David A

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #34 on: 01-27-2004 15:11 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Xmpel:
-   Saved the City of New New York from a big ball of garbage.

You might want to change it to "Helped save the City of New New York from a big ball of garbage."  The first attempt failed, and it was Fry's idea that actually saved the city.

That's nitpicking, I know; but that's what you're asking for, right?

Speak softly. Drive a Sherman tank.
kelley

Crustacean
*
« Reply #35 on: 01-27-2004 15:21 »

nice
Thoth

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #36 on: 01-27-2004 17:15 »

ach, you forgot that he's a nudist....a public nudist...
Xmpel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #37 on: 01-27-2004 17:40 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by David A:
 You might want to change it to "Helped save the City of New New York from a big ball of garbage."  The first attempt failed, and it was Fry's idea that actually saved the city.

True. But he needs credits for coming up with the idea of having an object the same density and such.

I'll write "helped save the city".

 
Quote
Originally posted by Thoth:
ach, you forgot that he's a nudist....a public nudist...

He never actually said or showed this. He just said that there wasn't any primitive notions of modesty."

You don't have to ba a nudist because you sometimes walk around naked.

I wrote that in the bio.


FilthyCrab

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #38 on: 01-28-2004 10:11 »

Very cool bit of research.

Just to nit-pick a bit (more)

- The professor didn't go on the fantastic voyage - he stayed back in the lab.
David A

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #39 on: 01-28-2004 10:51 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by FilthyCrab:
- The professor didn't go on the fantastic voyage - he stayed back in the lab.

Well, technically they all stayed back in the lab, didn't they?   wink

By the same token, I guess that Fry never did journey to the inside of his own colon.   frown

Speak softly. Drive a Sherman tank.
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