Favorite/Funniest Zoidberg quotes

[Reply #240 on:]

Leela: ZOIDBERG!
Zoidberg: Sorry yuu must hav been boring me
:P

[Reply #241 on:]

"WhY aLwAyS wItH tHe FiGhTiNg?" and "cLaCk"

[Reply #242 on:]

WhY aLwAyS WiTh TypInG iN tHiS rEtArDeD WaY? seriously wise up

[Reply #243 on:]

i typed it like that because of how Zoidburg said it. |)|_||\/||3/-\55

[Reply #244 on:]

Perhaps he was trying to indicate the way Zoidberg's voice gently rises and falls in pitch and intensity due to the drug-induced high he is feeling during that scene...or maybe not.

EDIT: Oh wow, I was right!

[Reply #245 on:]

thank you, someone doesnt have their head in their "wazoo"

[Reply #246 on:]

i know what you were trying to do but in what world can you explain a drozey voice by differentiating between capital letters and lowercase letters?

Dont even want to know wtf you meant by "|)|_||\/||3/-\55" you stupid hick.

[Reply #247 on:]

Hick? its 1337 (leet) anyone with half a brain can easily read it. you are a fool.

[Reply #248 on:]

Im well aware anyone can read it, people just dont want to read the ramblings of some stupid texan fuck! (No offense to other texans, i just dont like idiots regardless of location)

[Reply #249 on:]

''Now I'm not saying the Professer is old, but when you consider his age, he's likely to die soon.''

[Reply #250 on:]

Hick? its 1337 (leet) anyone with half a brain can easily read it. you are a fool.

Typing in "1337 L0L!!11!!111!!1oneoneone" just makes you look like a dumbass noob. Don't.

[Reply #251 on:]

   its 1337 (leet) anyone with half a brain can easily read it.

Yeah, but people with a whole brain don't want to have to read it.

[Reply #252 on:]

Furthermore, being someone who has a had a large piece of my brain removed, I take offence to that statement!

I don't really but you're still a dick.

[Reply #253 on:]

That's telling him, or me, or someone!

[Reply #254 on:]

I was commenting on Hfire's "anyone with half a brain" nonsense.

Pff! He thinks he's cool for typing in 1337!

[Reply #255 on:]

That reminds me of dialog from an old Bob Hope film:

"You ought to meet my brother; he's twice as smart as me!"
"Oh, a half wit, eh?"

[Reply #256 on:]

I don't think Zoidberg is the funniest character, but I just love the ending of A Clockwork Origin:

Farnsworth: Then it's settled. Finally, a world in which I am happy to raise my son!
Zoidberg: Good, cause I'm sick of him!
[Closing Credits.]
Zoidberg: [Over credits.] I'm serious. He's a terrible person.
 

[Reply #257 on:]

"Hey I have a busted ass here! But I don't see anyone kissing it!"

"Alright, I'm coming!"

[Reply #258 on:]

Hermes: Come on, baby needs a new pair of shoes
Zoidberg: The hell with your spoiled baby. I need those shoes.

[Reply #259 on:]

Amy: "That's what we said about Zoidberg, and look how that turned out."
Zoidberg: "Amy has a point."

[Reply #260 on:]

I love this Zoidberg quotes from "The Thief of Baghead"; something about the convoluted way he states a simple fact tickles me:

"Look! I own words that are helpful!"

I also love the superfluous article when he asks Bender if he got "any pictures of the Calculon" at the aquarium.

[Reply #261 on:]

"He's even more beautiful than before!"

[Reply #262 on:]

This exchange from "Free Will Hunting" contains what strikes me as, like, classic Zoidberg logic:

Bender: Life is about decisions. Make the wrong ones, and you'll wind up face-down in a pool of your own blood and urine.
Zoidberg: Still, to have your own pool!

[Reply #263 on:]

when they had just been kidnapped
Leela: Why did you bring us here?
Zoidberg: And why did I have to take a cab?

"Fry, It's been years since medical school, so remind me. Disemboweling in your species, Fatal or non-fatal?"

[Reply #264 on:]

After aquiring a shell from the seabord near the lost city of Atlanta Zoidberg said:
"Look at me ZOIDBERG HOME OWNER!" that one's a classic   

[Reply #265 on:]

"To the employment cave!"