Favourite Professor Farnsworth Quotes

[Reply #40 on:]

"ohh geez oh man!"
"ahhhhh to be young again....and also a robot"
"and if anything goes wrong, keep the blood"

[Reply #41 on:]

"Oh yes."
-Professor when caught in bed with Mom. Its the tone of voice which makes it so funny.

[Reply #42 on:]

Lets go damnit! Lets go!

[Reply #43 on:]

Brisk (Professor strips) -Xmas story

[Reply #44 on:]

Farnsworth: Forget it, I'm not going! I have my reasons! Shut up all of you!

Hermes: Strange. You haven't acted suspicious since I found those "ape bones" in the basement.

Farnsworth: My hip hurts! I'm in the middle of cooking a turkey! I have warranty cards to fill out! I'm not just making excuses! Alright I'll go!

-Crimes of the Hot


Randy [from his car]: Hey grandpa, move your wrinkly old kiester!

[He drives away. Farnsworth takes a little time to react.]

Farnsworth [from ship]: Shut up!

And...

Heather:  Sir, its not neccesary or wise to be naked.

Farnsworth: You sound just like my tennis instructor.

And...

Farnsworth : With my last breath I curse Zoidberg!

-Teenage Mutant Leela Hurdles( Farnsworth is brilliant in this episode)

[Reply #45 on:]

Mom: Daffodils? Seventy years and you remember my favourite flower!
Farnsworth: Your favourite whaa? Why does my foot hurt?

[Reply #46 on:]

I just watched The Sting. Must add some more:

Leela (crying): It was all my fault! He died because of me!

Farnsworth: No no no no no no no. [He turns to Bender.] I'm lying to make her feel better.

[Leela cries more.]

And...

Farnsworth: Oh course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! [He laughs then sighs.] Oh, I made myself sad.

[Reply #47 on:]

 

Originally posted by LaVaLaDy:
"well, i am already in  my pajamas"

Haha yeah I was thinking the same thing!

[Reply #48 on:]

 

Originally posted by Drunknmunky:
Farnsworth: Oh course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! [He laughs then sighs.] Oh, I made myself sad.

Best Farnsworth quote ever.

[Reply #49 on:]

Everyone's all for conserving Hitler's brain, but when you want to put it in the body of a Great White Sark ooooo suddenly you have gone too far.
 also...

FRY:But wont that change history?

Professor:Oh a lesson in not changing history from mister I'm my own grandpa!

[Reply #50 on:]

 

Originally posted by Drunknmunky:
Farnsworth: Oh course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! [He laughs then sighs.] Oh, I made myself sad.

Yeah that one's great.

"Get a job!" (The Farnsworth Parabox, 'our' Farnsworth says it to Prof. Freaksworth)

 

[Reply #51 on:]

 

Originally posted by Drunknmunky:
I just watched The Sting. Must add some more:

Leela (crying): It was all my fault! He died because of me!

Farnsworth: No no no no no no no. [He turns to Bender.] I'm lying to make her feel better.

[Leela cries more.]

And...

Farnsworth: Oh course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! [He laughs then sighs.] Oh, I made myself sad.

"No! Now I'm the oldest person in my family!"

[Reply #52 on:]

Professer- "Where's the contraption that allows you to slow and speed the passage of time?"

Fri- "Under the seat."*pulls out a bong*

[Reply #53 on:]

 

Originally posted by evan:
"No! Now I'm the oldest person in my family!"

  second 

[Reply #54 on:]

Farnsworth: "Today you'll be making a delivery to Ebola 9, the virus planet"
Hermes: "Why cant they go today?"
Farnsworth: "Because tonight is a very special night, and I want all of you to be alive."


Farnsworth 420: "There's a universe in all of us"
Farnsworth: "Get a job!"

That one, the way he said it, it cracked me up.

[Reply #55 on:]

'I move that your cat STINKS and is UGLY!'

[Reply #56 on:]

Fry: It just needs a little gas.
Farnsworth: Wrong again idiot.

Farnsworth: We're not seeing it again, ask something less stupid!!

Farnsworth: Why? Why? Why didn't I break his legs?

Farnsworth: All he handed in was a paper smeared with dung. He tied with Fry.

Leela: Isn't there a way to examine my head without cutting it off?
Farnsworth: Yes, easily.

Farnsworth: Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mister I'm-My-Own-Grandpa. Let's get the hell out of here! Screw history!

[Reply #57 on:]

"has everyone taken their subpositary?" the whole runnig gag was pure gold!

"and you can be the robot"
the gang enters and greets
"good lord, youre alive, come back in about 3 days"

[Reply #58 on:]

From The Sting:-

Leela: In my dream Fry said he hid a gift for me in my locker. If it's true then he must still exist in some form.

Farnsworth: Oh course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! haha... awww... I made myself sad.

[Reply #59 on:]

"Everybody! Get in bed with me!"
"Thank God this log is sturdy (The log breaks) Guenter! Put on the hat! You're the only one who can save us! (puts the hat on his butt) (muttering) stupid monkey!"
"Everybody! I have a dramatic announcement! So anybody with a weak heart please leave now.Goodbye!"
"Yes,let's all talk about Leela's personal life later.Right now we have business to attend to."

[Reply #60 on:]

In Bendless Love....

"Thank you for your sympathy, talking square of linoleum...." 

and in X-Mas Story, when Fry asks "Shouldn't they be some sort of you know, pine tree....?"
The Prof answers with "Ho huh whaa....?" 

[Reply #61 on:]

"Lets get this gargoyle hunt on the road!"

Also, cant remember the exact quote but...

Leela: Now Professor, remember, Bender is the good Santa, so theres no need to kill him.
Prof: Yes yes, you sound like a broken MP3
*Bender comes down the chimney*
*Professor shoots him*
Leela: Professor no! Dont you remember what I said?!
Prof: Noooo!
*Shoots Bender again

 

[Reply #62 on:]

A man can dream Oh yes a man can dream

[Reply #63 on:]

"Not a moment too soon. While you were away, the 'Trotters held a press conference to announce I was a jive sucka'!"

[Reply #64 on:]

"Go to Hell, Heather!"

[Reply #65 on:]

This is no ordinary honey!!

[Reply #66 on:]

Farnsworth: Do I hear wedding bells?
Fry: No!
Farnsworth: Really? Oh dear...

[Reply #67 on:]

"You take one nap in a ditch in the park, and people start declaring you this and that!"

[Reply #68 on:]

"Refering to siccores
lela- we'll get them there as fast as we can
fansworth-ok but dont run with them"

"oh foo"

Fansworth- which two are the new guys?

Hermes- the green dude and the fat man

F- i can swear I'v never seen the robot before

Bender- it me bender the lovabal rascal

F- oh yes me good friend (shrugs to hermes)

[Reply #69 on:]

"Yes, we all miss our loved ones and gasses..."

[Reply #70 on:]

'Tell them I hate them.'

It cracks me up everytime I hear it.

[Reply #71 on:]

Farnsworth: Which one's are new?
Hermes: The green dude and the fat mon.
Farnsworth: Really? I could swear I've never seen that robot before either...
Bender: It's me, Bender. You know, the lovable rascal!
Farnsworth: Oh, yes of course my good friend...(Shrugs at Hermes) Anyway, whoever you all are...

[Reply #72 on:]

Ahem, MOle, take a peek at brainslugwearer's last post in this thread.

P.S. Farnsworth never said that.

[Reply #73 on:]

actually he does say that(i think)

[Reply #74 on:]

You mean Farnsworth once said "Ahem, MOle, take a peek at brainslugwearer's last post in this thread?"

[Reply #75 on:]

"Oh My, Yes"

        

[Reply #76 on:]

"It worked! Eat it, everyone who's never won a Noble Prize! And that includes you amy."

[Reply #77 on:]

Psst, Niblonian, it IS actually possible for two people to have the same favourite quote...

Myself?

Whenever "Go to hell!" is uttered, you can bet I'm enjoying it..

[Reply #78 on:]

A nice Farnsworth/Bender interplay from "My Three Sons":

Farnsworth: Good news, everyone!

Bender: Uh oh! This sounds bad.

Farnsworth: You'll be making a delivery to Trisol.

Bender: Here it comes...

Farnsworth: ...a mysterious planet hidden in the depths of the Forbidden Zone.

Bender: Thank you and goodnight.  (resumes drinking)

From "Bender Gets Made":

Bender: Well, I'm off to work at the restaurant. One of you will have to fill in for me while I'm gone.

Farnsworth: Better yet, I'll build someone to fill in for you. Some kind of gamma powered mechanical monster, with freeway on-ramps for arms and a heart as black as coal... (leaves the room muttering insanely to himself)

Bender: Well, if that new give can't handle things, gimmie a call.

And from "Roswell That End's Well":

Farnsworth: We tore the universe a new space-hole, all right, and now it's clenching shut.

(eww...)

[Reply #79 on:]

From IDAR:
"Oh dear.  She's caught in an infinite loop and he's an idiot. Well, that's love for you."