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Author Topic: Is Zapp Brannigan Gods gift to Women?  (Read 1287 times)
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winna

Avatar Czar
DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #40 on: 07-01-2001 12:29 »

It's possible that Zapp is neither a curse nor a gift, maybe instead he is a heaven or hell?   In that case the beauty lies in the beholder.  Some philosophers have said that one man's heaven might just be another man's hell and vice versa.  Under those circumstances and rules, the new question would be about Leela (the only person we've seen have sex with Zapp and a relation as well).  So is Zapp Leela's Hell, or is he still Hot just not in a Fire and Brimstone kinda way?
rach_the_tall

Space Pope
****
« Reply #41 on: 07-02-2001 10:05 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by winna:
It's possible that Zapp is neither a curse nor a gift, maybe instead he is a heaven or hell?   In that case the beauty lies in the beholder.  Some philosophers have said that one man's heaven might just be another man's hell and vice versa.  Under those circumstances and rules, the new question would be about Leela (the only person we've seen have sex with Zapp and a relation as well).  So is Zapp Leela's Hell, or is he still Hot just not in a Fire and Brimstone kinda way?

you're reading into zapp too much  smile He just serves a purpose as the 'joke target' on futurama. Oh and to add sexxiness  wink
Chump

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #42 on: 07-02-2001 19:46 »

Hell no Chumps and Chumpettes! If he were Gods gift to women, he would have never had an eye for Leela, disguise or no disguise. Plus, lets not forget how disgusted Nixon was by his "gizmo".

Hmm?

Now 15% less threatening to your sexuality!
iliketowankalot

Professor
*
« Reply #43 on: 07-02-2001 20:59 »

Nixon isn't a woman, mosts guys would get disgusted when their face is shoved within a couple of inches of another mans gizmo.
VelourFog

Space Pope
****
« Reply #44 on: 07-02-2001 22:39 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by rach_the_tall:Oh and to add sexxiness   wink
i agree with what you just said.  Zapp rocks.  He is the comic gods' gift to me.

  love


"cuter than a chinchilla, and only twice as bitey" -rach
Momobeast

Crustacean
*
« Reply #45 on: 07-21-2001 02:30 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Chump:
Hell no Chumps and Chumpettes! If he were Gods gift to women, he would have never had an eye for Leela, disguise or no disguise. Plus, lets not forget how disgusted Nixon was by his "gizmo".

Hmm?


Yeah but it couldve been so big, + nixon is just a head + mite of been jealous on zapps manhood!   roll eyes
Marcet_Kroker

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #46 on: 07-21-2001 16:40 »

I just don't like Zapp for his ovious chezzyness and his smarmy style, I'd much rather go out with Nibbler than one day looking at Zapp. I feel sorry for poor Kif for having to put up with him...  frown  this is what i would do if Zapp fell down a man hole   evil laugh
futurefreak

salutatory committee member
Moderator
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #47 on: 07-21-2001 19:59 »

no one ever mentions if he's good in bed...i'm guessing no...cuz then he might be respected more   flirt

lilmurray37

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #48 on: 08-04-2001 18:59 »

I'm guessing he's not very good in bed since he's so desperate
VelourFog

Space Pope
****
« Reply #49 on: 08-04-2001 21:34 »

Maybe he's extra good.  He's been saving up for so long..... He doesn't waste his time and energy on having sex with anyone
lilmurray37

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #50 on: 08-05-2001 00:51 »

I think he is just desperate. He can't get any so he uses sympathy to get want he wants.  flirt
BenderHookah

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #51 on: 08-08-2001 06:51 »

hey at least his musical performance for leela wasnt bad at all L-E-E-L-A Leeeeeeeeeeela...dadadadadida u!
 big grin
lilmurray37

Delivery Boy
**
« Reply #52 on: 08-08-2001 23:22 »
« Last Edit on: 08-12-2001 00:00 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Radijs:
Leela couldnt possibly have done the big Z out of pity.

Look how pityfu Zoidberg is!!!

Well it would be kind of dificult for Zoidberg to "inject his jelly into leela" since they are different species. I doubt Zoidberg has the right fixtures to do a human
   big grin
mofo37

Crustacean
*
« Reply #53 on: 08-09-2001 14:55 »

No, but you could imagine what that would be like!  Of course, Zoidberg is pathetic in a different way.  Zapp tries and then crashes and burns so horrifically Leela can't help but notice.  A big part of Zoidberg patheticness is that nobody notices him.  If Leela were to notice Zoidberg enough to notice him, she would probably give him the rogerring of his life.
Just Chris

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #54 on: 08-11-2001 09:30 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by futurefreak:
no one ever mentions if he's good in bed...i'm guessing no...cuz then he might be respected more    flirt


But he calls himself The Zapper, eh?  wink At least he ain't married and being such a womanizer like Mayor Quimby.

mofo37

Crustacean
*
« Reply #55 on: 08-11-2001 15:45 »

i doubt getting married would be part of Brannigan's Law.  It's hard to be a pimp when you're married.  Otherwise, he actually is like Mayor Quimby.
mint

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #56 on: 09-22-2004 20:12 »

I think a personality like Zapp's is actually attractive to some women. Some women like to hear those kinds of pick up lines Zapp comes up with.  Conversely if the women is somebody serious about her sex life she would probably despise slimy up himself ego man like Zapp.
Nerd-o-rama

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #57 on: 09-22-2004 20:17 »

[Lrrr]No, quit bumping[/Lrrr]

That said, I do know women who have dated fat assholes like this.  Rather than me.  This is one of those times I should have ended my story a sentence sooner.
athena1999

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #58 on: 09-26-2004 15:23 »

The answer is obvious... YES!  Even if I don't really have a crush on him anymore, I still think the answer is yes.
Spacedal11

Space Pope
****
« Reply #59 on: 10-03-2004 21:03 »

I think that Zap is a nightmare. I mean how many women has he dated on the show that they were happy with him? And don't say the "woman" from PYHOMS cause she left him.
evan

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #60 on: 10-03-2004 21:37 »

Answer to the title question: yes.

That is all.
Colonel43

Bending Unit
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« Reply #61 on: 10-03-2004 21:47 »

Answer to the title question: no.

That is all.
Zipy_Googlemire

Crustacean
*
« Reply #62 on: 10-03-2004 23:15 »

I duno maybe If he worked some of that bulk off his gut.....
TheLampIncident

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #63 on: 10-03-2004 23:36 »

*adds mint to list of people he hates*

To be more on topic, Zapp isn't a gift, he's the kind of person I'd expect to spend time with at an in-school suspension. Just plain stupid. That cannot be said explicity enough. He can't see any kind of personality in women, and he's poor at expressing how badly he wants to fuck them. Gawd daim.
totalnerd undercanada

DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #64 on: 10-03-2004 23:53 »

He's God's gift to sci-fi-sitcom scriptwriters.

Also, he's firggin' awesome.

But as far as women go, Zapp is more of an unwanted gift.
Probulator

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #65 on: 10-08-2004 17:14 »

He's God's warning to women. A warning is a very useful type of gift, isn't it?
I'm not entirely sure what he's a warning against, though. Perhaps the dangers of what happens when you let too many hair-care products seep into your brain?
SpaceCase

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #66 on: 10-09-2004 13:15 »

<Reads thread title>

  laff <Full minute of derisive laughter>  laff

<Wipes eyes>

Oh, stop! yer killin' me, here!

*Ahem*

Sorry about that.

ABSOLUTELY NOT!  no no
FemJesse

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #67 on: 10-09-2004 22:31 »

Zapp Brannigan speaks to me as saying "Don't have pity sex or you'll regret it later"

... boy will you regret it later..
airbagfailure

Space Pope
****
« Reply #68 on: 10-09-2004 23:31 »
« Last Edit on: 10-09-2004 23:31 »

how can he be god's gift to women if he can't even pleasure a mutant?
Don't forget in season 2's "brannigan begin again" episode, when Zapp comes crawling to planet express:-

Zapp: Leela. I didn't know where else to turn. You're the only woman who ever loved me.

Leela: I never loved you.

Zapp: I mean physically.

Leela: What do you want?

Zapp: Just let me work for a little food. Perhaps I could paint a fence or, service you sexually, or mop the floors.

Leela: You don't know how to do any of those things.

Zapp: Kif might.


I rest my case...


(oops..sorry...annoying typo i had to fix)
athena1999

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #69 on: 10-16-2004 20:35 »

Does that mean you hate me too, Lampy? *pouts* 

I seriously think he's God's gift to women.  I mean, he's a bubbling Crock-Pot of male hormones!  He won't be able to fit all that libido into a small package, so of course he's... erm... big!  What SHOULDN'T women like about him?  Leela needs to appreciate him, then he'll stop being so annoying.  If I were in Leela's shoes-- er, clunky, man-sized boots, I wouldn't toss him aside like the butt-ugly pair of earrings I got for Christmas last year.  He's not a crappy gift--he's a GIFT!
starone

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #70 on: 10-21-2004 11:05 »

But he's a moron.
John Pannozzi

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #71 on: 10-21-2004 16:47 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Kryten:
 More like Satan's curse to women.


Zapp is neither God's gift to women nor Satan's curse to women [Dib] he's just stupid! [/Dib]
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