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Author Topic: The Loooovenasium (Or, the Intelligent, Long-Winded Shipper Thread, Part II)  (Read 13301 times)
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coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #240 on: 10-21-2006 21:55 »

SpaceCase - you're right, Fry isn't anywhere near violent enough. He needs to become more brutal and bloodthirsty if he wants to win Leela's kung-fu heart.
It's difficult to respect a man who won't beat another man half to death over a small disagreement.
However my initial Fry VS Zapp idea wasn't completely about physical combat, just a more general hatred leading to different kinds of competitive and dastardly behaviour. Zapp might drum-up reasons to have Fry arrested to get him out of the picture for example, and Fry might see fit to demand an apology from Zapp when he makes inappropriate comments to Leela, etc etc.
But you know Fry would just have to punch the bastard in the mouth at least once.

Apple Tea: Hahahahahaha @ lava pit.  big grin

Bending Unit 99

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #241 on: 10-22-2006 05:23 »

LOL Leela in the lava pit
just remember in parasites lost how the truckers were insulting Leela and Fry was trying to defend her and he only succeeded in making it worse, i mean if i was fry right then i would have just hooked the guy at the beginning, Fry's too dumb to be violent if you ask me
coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #242 on: 10-22-2006 05:40 »

Too dumb to be violent? That seems a contridiction in terms, doesn't it? I mean, look at America's President. It seems the stupider the person the more total and widespread their violence becomes.
Fry certainly enjoys shooting things. Punching is just a purer form of the same impulse.
Cyberphobia

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #243 on: 10-22-2006 06:50 »

I think if Fry was too violent, he wouldn't be so perfect for Leela because Leela needs to be the dominant one in the relationship and Fry's like the sweet 'boy next door' type of guy. But then Leela would still be heaps impressed if he hurt Zapp for her. He just can't be too violent because it would change his image.
any1else

Space Pope
****
« Reply #244 on: 10-22-2006 07:08 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Cyberphobia: He just can't be too violent because it would change his image.

He could pinch Zapp.
Bending Unit 99

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #245 on: 10-22-2006 07:20 »
« Last Edit on: 10-22-2006 07:20 »

coldangel - what i mean is that, in parasites lost for example, Fry doesn't seem to understand what the truckers are on about, so maybe he's not too dumb to be violent, he's just too dumb to understand an insult that would lead to violence
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #246 on: 10-22-2006 11:45 »

I think Fry is a genraly non-violent person. Maybe to do with his parents always hitting eachother
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #247 on: 10-22-2006 12:49 »

I have decided to respond to this issue with a little story fragment I've had on my hard drives for a long time...one of the many that will probably just exist as fragments and never germinate into actual stories. 

 smile

~~~~~

[The situation: because of various plot contrivance, Leela, Fry and Zapp are marooned on a deserted tropical planetoid.  For some reason, Fry is finding Zapp exceptionally annoying - as much as, say, Günther in Mars U.  Leela has sent the two bickering males off to search for food while she works on the shelter or something. ]

~~~~~

“Ah!  The biggest kokonuts!” Zapp exclaimed smugly “Exceptionally round and firm.  This will win me the hand of the lovely Leela.  And other bodily parts as well.”

“Ha,” Fry muttered, though he abandoned three of his smaller kokonuts.  As Zapp was noisily smooching his pair of nuts, Fry raised his voice and added,  “The only hand you’ll get from Leela is the one making a fist.  In your face.

“The fist of love,” Zapp declared, “I remember it fondly.”  He delicately licked each kokonut on the nub of its broken stem. 

Fry felt an uncommon heat rising in the back of his brain.  As he savagely yanked a couple of nuts free from their trunk, he added “And the only other part you’ll ever get is her big honkin’ boot, as she makes a spectacular flying round kick into your flabby stomach!”

“Brave words from one who hasn’t so much as reached first blern, let alone driven home the grand sexy slammer that the Zapper has.”  He accompanied his speech with descriptive thrusts of his pelvis.

Fry growled, and threw his kokonuts to the ground.  “That does it!  Maybe I’ve never gotten into her underpants, or even her overpants, but that’s just because she’s never felt nearly as sorry for me as she did for you!”  He put his hands on his hips proudly.  “On the scale of losers, Zapp Brannigan, you are at the bottom, while I am comfortably ensconced in the lower middle range!  Put that up your tacky miniskirt and swallow it!”

Zapp dropped his kokonuts and assumed a threatening mein (and glowering a mean threat).  “You dare mock Zapp Brannigan and his spiffy velour uniform?”

Fry folded his arms and glared through narrowed eyes.  “Huh.  On you, it looks like gabardine.”

Brannigan’s eyes flared as wide as his skirt, quickly followed by his nostrils, and Fry suddenly remembered that Zapp had half a foot and twenty pounds of flab on him.  “Nyuh!” he squealed, and ran instinctively for safety.  “Leela!”

~~~~~

Leela had finally gotten the roof-frame stable again when the she heard Fry’s approaching voice, yelling “Leela!  Help!” 

Quickly she let the poles drop and sprinted in the direction it came from.  Before she’d gone far, however, Fry burst into the clearing...followed a moment later by Zapp.

Fry immediately hid behind her.  “Help, Leela! He’s after me!”

Zapp attempted to circle her, snatching at Fry, who was keeping Leela between them.  “Your cowardice is revealed!  If you were a REAL man, you’d have much better things to do from behind a woman than hide there!”

The realization that they were in no ACTUAL danger made Leela’s temper boil over.  She half-turned, grabbed both of them by the collar, and slammed their heads together.  It sounded oddly like two kokonuts colliding.

“Owwww,” Fry said, sitting up and rubbing his head. 

Zapp moaned from where he sprawled in the grass.  “....Kif, get the number of that cargo ship that hit me...have the pilot pureéd.  And lay out my formal hospital gown.”

“All right!” Leela said. “I’ve had enough of you two!  We have to work together to survive in this situation, in case you both forgot!  If you’re going to act like children, then I’ll separate you.  Fry, you go east.  Zapp, you go west.  And don’t come back until you think you can pretend to behave like something vaguely approximating an adult!”

Fry scrambled up.  “But Leela - “

Leela pointed over his shoulder.  “Go!”

Fry said, softly but emphatically, “But Leela, he insulted you!”

Leela rolled her eye, and lowered her voice.  “Don’t you think I know that?  He’s Zapp! I don’t expect any better from him.  But I do expect a little better from you.”

For half a second, Fry brightened, and then his face fell like a tottering tower of Slurm cans.  With one last, mortified glance, he turned and hurried east.

Leela swallowed, already regretting her harshness.

“Ah, alone at last....” Zapp began.

Leela whirled on him, regret flown.

“ - ah, eh, I’ll...just be going bweast.  Er, west,”  Zapp corrected, walking quickly away.

Leela closed the distance.  “Wait one moment.  I have something to tell you, Zapp dear.”

“You do?!” Zapp spun back, smiling like a kid with a balloon.  Quickly he recovered, pulling his smugness back on.  “That is - of course you do!”  He brushed off his uniform.  “Which way do you want me?  Myself, I favor on - “

Leela seized his collar in one fist, pulling his head down even with hers and twisting the fabric tight.

“GACK!” said Zapp.

“I can put up with your sleazy insults,” she began.

“Kckh, sputter, zhck!” said Zapp.

“...and your inane insinuations, your single entendrés, and your utter lack of respect for me as a biological life form...”

“Hrh, hrh, glckhckhck!” said Zapp.

“...but I want you to know one thing.”  Leela brought his eye (the one that wasn’t wincing) even with hers and bored her gaze into it.  “If Fry gets so much as a paper cut or a bug bite because of you, I’ll break your kneecaps, cover you with syrup, and leave you in front of a millipincer nest.  Do you understand me?”

Zapp waved his arms a little, his face turning blue.

“Oh, and first,” she added, “To give them the scent, I’ll remove and throw them something of yours that’s small, soft, and rarely sees any use.”

“.....g-g-gck?!?![/i]”

“No.  NOT your brain!”  Leela released him.

“...ghchyeeee-hyAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!”  Zapp gasped, inhaling.

Leela turned her back on him and started over to the fallen shelter.

Zapp heaved in air a couple of times.  “Leela, my - - “

Leela turned and GLARED.

“- - temporary but VERY respected commander, aye aye!  At once!  Zapp Brannigan, speeding away!” 

Zapp Brannigan speeded away.

~~~~~

 wink

Shiny
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #248 on: 10-22-2006 12:56 »

Ahhh, Leela loves Fry Leela loves Fry
fryandlemon

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #249 on: 10-22-2006 13:43 »
« Last Edit on: 10-22-2006 13:43 »

...

Wow... Shiny you can really write!  It's so hard to get TV characters to work well on page, but you did it!  Bravo!  Here, have a shippy pic:

jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #250 on: 10-22-2006 14:01 »

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEE
SHIPPY PIC
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY
*explodes*
SpaceCase

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #251 on: 10-22-2006 14:03 »
« Last Edit on: 10-22-2006 14:03 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by coldangel_1:
SpaceCase - you're right, Fry isn't anywhere near violent enough. He needs to become more brutal and bloodthirsty if he wants to win Leela's kung-fu heart.
It's difficult to respect a man who won't beat another man half to death over a small disagreement.
Uhm, not quite what I had in mind.
True, seeing some jerk who desperately deserves it, getting pulverized does Leela’s heart a world of good, and she does respect physical prowess, but I’ve always thought Fry would tend to counterbalance her violent impulses. 
Quote
However my initial Fry VS Zapp idea wasn't completely about physical combat, just a more general hatred leading to different kinds of competitive and dastardly behaviour. Zapp might drum-up reasons to have Fry arrested to get him out of the picture for example, and Fry might see fit to demand an apology from Zapp when he makes inappropriate comments to Leela, etc etc.
A battle of wits between Fry and Zap?   eek    confused    hmpf    laff
That would be like a fencing match between to adversaries armed with BUTTERKINIVES! 
Quote
But you know Fry would just have to punch the bastard in the mouth at least once.
I could see Fry doing so, but he’d need HUGE provocation. 
Quote
Originally posted by Cyberphobia:
I think if Fry was too violent, he wouldn't be so perfect for Leela because Leela needs to be the dominant one in the relationship and Fry's like the sweet 'boy next door' type of guy. But then Leela would still be heaps impressed if he hurt Zapp for her. He just can't be too violent because it would change his image.
T’would seem we agree...   wink

And Madam Shiny: I bow before your authorial greatness.    love
Quote
Originally posted by jle1993:
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEE
SHIPPY PIC
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY
*explodes*
[Looks]
*Sigh* I am not gonna' clean that up.
I hope y'got a killer warranty on those nano-bots...  wink
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #252 on: 10-22-2006 14:18 »

*reasembles* I got an upgrade cause I kept exploding. I can't help it, shippiness exictes me, and when I get exicted I explode.
SpaceCase

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #253 on: 10-22-2006 14:46 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by jle1993:
*reasembles* I got an upgrade cause I kept exploding.
Smart move.
Quote
I can't help it, shippiness exictes me, and when I get exicted I explode.
Oh...
'Scuse me, then...
I didn't realize you have a medical condition.  wink
Does Jerry Lewis, or somebody, do a telethon for it?
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #254 on: 10-22-2006 14:51 »

 I only explode when I don't take my pills, and my doc won't renew my perscription
fryandlemon

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #255 on: 10-22-2006 15:39 »

 
Quote
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But you know Fry would just have to punch the bastard in the mouth at least once.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I could see Fry doing so, but he’d need HUGE provocation.

Fry could punch him, I can see it too, but I have a feeling it wouldn't be a very good punch.  I wouldn't be surprised if he even missed Zapps jaw on the first attempt.  And Leela would either love him for trying, or act how she did in PL when Fry tried to defend her.
KitKatBar-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #256 on: 10-22-2006 20:10 »

Actually, I can totally see Fry giving Zapp a really good punch to the jaw. He's stupid, but not so stupid that he couldn't defend Leela when she is in trouble. Look at L and R-he was smart enough to know that connecting his oxygen tube to hers would save her. Sure, he'd need a pretty intense action to make him do it, but who knows what Zapp's capable of. Maybe even a little touchy-feely in places he shou;dn't be touchy-feely-ing, and POW! A good'un, straight to the head.
I can see it now....
fryandlemon

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #257 on: 10-22-2006 20:26 »

Being smart has nothing to do with being able to throw a really good punch...
Professor Zoidy

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #258 on: 10-22-2006 21:18 »

*applaudes at shippy picture above* I really love it.
coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #259 on: 10-23-2006 00:56 »
« Last Edit on: 10-23-2006 00:56 by coldangel_1 »

Great literature, shiny.

As for Fry punching Zapp, I kind of imagine it in a moment of insane fury when he snaps and lashes out like that time Homer punched Mr Burns on the Simpsons, and then he'd be all shocked at himself.

Then Leela might do THIS and shock HERself:
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #260 on: 10-23-2006 06:16 »

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEE
SHIPY PICS YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY
You know whats coming now don't you?
*explodes*
Bending Unit 99

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #261 on: 10-23-2006 06:38 »

ewww, its all over me

i think that fry would be like "oh my god i punched zapp, yay"
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #262 on: 10-23-2006 06:50 »

*reasembles*

Zapp: Leela was wonderful in bed, to bad you'll never know.
Fry: I'm not listening
Zapp: I never relised a chick could come so easily.
*BAM*
Zapp: ma noz, ya brok ma noz
Fry: Oh my god, I punched Zapp
*Enter Leela*
Leela: What's going on in here?
Zapp: Hi broke ma noz (point at Fry)
Leela: You broke his nose?
Fry: He insulted your honor and I (Leela kisses Fry) mmmhmhmmmmmh
Leela: (brakes off kiss) Thanks Fry (kicks Zapp in the ribs) How does Elzar's at 8 sound
Fry: Whaa, yeah, Elzar's at 8 sounds perfect
Leela: Later Fry
*Exit Leela*
Fry: YESSSSSS
*Exit Fry*
Zapp: ma noz, wat bout ma noz?
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #263 on: 10-23-2006 08:11 »

Xanfor: Me baaaaack! Me not read all these pages now... Me go edit WikiPEELia and amakee Shiny famous!

Bending Unit 99

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #264 on: 10-23-2006 08:26 »

yay wikiPEELia, wow a list of shippers and everything, and theres people i know on there, yay
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #265 on: 10-23-2006 08:30 »

Wow, I'm on the list of shippers, cool
Xanfor

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #266 on: 10-23-2006 08:55 »

Check your entry.  wink

jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #267 on: 10-23-2006 08:57 »

Cool, you fixed it for me, thx!  smile
coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #268 on: 10-23-2006 09:51 »

jle: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love that bit of dialogue you just pulled out of your bum there. It's PERFECT!  big grin  big grin

jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #269 on: 10-23-2006 09:56 »

I do my best wink
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #270 on: 10-23-2006 12:08 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Shiny:
“On the scale of losers, Zapp Brannigan, you are at the bottom, while I am comfortably ensconced in the lower middle range! Put that up your tacky miniskirt and swallow it!”

That made me giggle.
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #271 on: 10-23-2006 12:18 »

YAY, Venus is here *celebrates*

This message is from the exploding shipper  big grin
Venus

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #272 on: 10-23-2006 13:05 »

Yeh i finally got my cable hooked up. Being without it sucked.
jle1993

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #273 on: 10-23-2006 13:07 »

YAHOO
Party to welcome back her royal shippyness
*throws party with kittens and pics of Fry and Leela*
Bending Unit 99

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #274 on: 10-23-2006 15:25 »

oh my god i found spelling errors in wikiPEELia, only two though


Ralph Snart

Agent Provocateur
Near Death Star Inhabitant
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #275 on: 10-23-2006 16:19 »
« Last Edit on: 10-24-2006 00:00 »

   
Quote
Originally posted by Shiny:

“ - ah, eh, I’ll...just be going bweast.  Er, west,”  Zapp corrected, walking quickly away.

Love it!    love

   
Quote
“Which way do you want me?  Myself, I favor on - “

That's our Zapp:  Unbelievably clueless and infinitely self-centered.

   
Quote
“I can put up with your sleazy insults,” she began.

“...and your inane insinuations, your single entendrés, and your utter lack of respect for me as a biological life form...”

I can hear the menacing growl in her voice.

   
Quote
“...but I want you to know one thing.”  Leela brought his eye (the one that wasn’t wincing) even with hers and bored her gaze into it.  “If Fry gets so much as a paper cut or a bug bite because of you, I’ll break your kneecaps, cover you with syrup, and leave you in front of a millipincer nest.  Do you understand me?”

Those 'Anger Management and Conflict Resolution' lessons are paying off.    wink

Her underlying devotion to Fry and her undying hatred of Zapp ooze from the screen in this little diatribe.  Of course I love it.

Oh crap - I better edit this and add:

Welcome back Venus - I hope your move was without problems and glad to see you have your internet up and running.  I hope the cats adapt to their new home quickly.

PEEL without Venus is like Zapp without Velour:  It will still exist, but won't be nearly as much fun.
KitKatBar-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #276 on: 10-23-2006 16:43 »

hehehe, I'm not on the list. Probably because I don't get much opportunity to post...Oh, well. Love y'all who are recorded there!
quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Shiny:
“ - ah, eh, I’ll...just be going bweast. Er, west,” Zapp corrected, walking quickly away.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Haha, that's good.  laff
Shiny

Professor
*
« Reply #277 on: 10-23-2006 19:11 »

Thank you, everybody!  Thank you fryandlemon, that's a lovely shippy pic! 

XANFOR!  Glad you're back, and thank you!  Wow, a WikiPEELia, huh?  I knew there was a Futurama wiki somewhere, but I didn't know about this one...Thank you for the nicely done entry! 

VENUS!  Glad you're back, and that you're able to jack on in again!  We missed you.  Scritch the cats for me....

Thank you Ralph, for the specific feedback...even though I didn't post for that purpose, it's astoundingly gratifying to receive it, nonetheless.  big grin 

Hooray, the Shippers are all together again!  Well, most of us...who brought the cake?

Ah, rats, no time to celebrate tonight...gotta go shift books and stuff...autumn cleaning, you know... *sigh*

But I'll be back as soon as feasible!  Ciao, Y'all.   smile

coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #278 on: 10-23-2006 21:09 »

I don't have cake. I have a jar of vegemite and some bits of half-stale bread. Sum total of my kitchen's contents, but help yourselves.
KitKatBar-Fry

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #279 on: 10-23-2006 22:42 »

Oooh, ooh! I can bring a cake! I have one on my fridge right now. A delicious ice cream cake, with chocolate icing that glops right into your mouth, and sprinkles. Mmmm, sprinkles.
Back on-topic, though, I could also see Fry interjecting, rather than physically hurting Zapp. Think this:
Zapp: So, my lusious fox-chariot Leela, how would you like to spend a bit more quality time in the loooovenasium with the big Z?
Leela: I've already told you before, Zapp, that night was a mistake. And I don't wanna here this bull come out of your mouth anymore, got it?
Zapp: Ah, but I have my ways of getting a lady into bed...
*procedes to advance to Leela*
Fry: Don't you dare hurt Aunt Martha!
Leela: I'm Leela.
Fry: Oh, yah. Anyways, we can take this outside, mano-to-mano, if you want, you ass.
Zapp: Eh...n-no, I couldn't do that I'd, uh...lose my rank as captain, yah that's it. A reasonable excuse to get out of something that might hurt.
Fry: C'mon Leela, let's go. This guy's about as harmful as a sack full of kittens.

See? No violence whatsoever, and Fry still manages to protect her. I doubt the Zapper would ever willingly allow himself to get into a fight for fear of losing. The big pussy...
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