Nomination-Worthy Posts Thread (nom nom nom)

[Reply #440 on:]

I came here to post the exact same sentence..

[Reply #441 on:]

Hey, skydiving and driving have a lot in common...or at least they do the way I drive.

[Reply #442 on:]

It's a shame they're ineligable because this is perhaps the greatest post of all time:

The last time Fox did something right... was when he did a barrel roll.  That's about it.

[Reply #443 on:]

My Little Throney.

winna:

[Reply #444 on:]

Oh, I've got a good one!

The FUTURAMA logo appears in the place of the caption, and the caption is in place of the logo. It reads:

Hey, this shouldn't be here!

The ship could fly through the O of "shouldn't".

DannyJC13 really thought outside the box in this post, where he made a really good idea for an opening intro line...

[Reply #445 on:]

I had a dream that featured Matthew Broderick. He was being an all-around jerk and molesting a kid (ew), so I beat him up, despite his using trophies as weapons. He kept making ridiculous statements like "That's right! We want you to believe this razor has 46 blades!" and "I can kill a man with my eyes".

What the hell, brain?

Overall hilarious, but that bold line just killed me.

[Reply #446 on:]

I just had a laugh attack! Well done Frisco...

And I'm peanut butter. You and I ought to get together sometime and make sweet, sweet sandwiches, Randi.

Just make sure you remember to use condiments.

[Reply #447 on:]

Love hurts.

That's normal. NEXT PATIENT!

[Reply #448 on:]

I wonder where he will blow next..

I don't. What are you, fucking gay?

For Freako, globviously...

[Reply #449 on:]

What's this about traps with big breasts?

[Reply #450 on:]

From Freako's group PEEL picture thread:

If I'm going to be standing can I have a black miniskirt with chains and knee high purple boots.

The bottom half won't be seen because you're behind people.
And even if you weren't, no. Just no.

[Reply #451 on:]

This board is like an unending soap opera that has the same plot for twenty years, just characters get older.

...

[Reply #452 on:]

What a piece of complete and utter trash. Truly, this item being listed on eBay is a complete and total waste of electrons. I hope nobody buys it and this dickhead still has to pay the listing charge.

The Homer glue blob was an enormous waste of electrons, but that had the redeeming feature of being an amusing accident. Even so, it barely qualified as "interesting", and should have been a photo buried somewhere on tumblr rather than an eBay item. This... shouldn't even be on the internet. The creator of this item should have never bothered making it. However, seeing as they went ahead and did so, they should have then done the decent thing and shoved it up their own arse, then taken a warfarin enema just so that the story attached to the item ended up with a modicum of entertainment value.

I can't adequately articulate how pointless this eBay listing, this thread, and the account that started it seem to me. Not if the above doesn't lay it out properly for you, anyhow.

Dear GOD, I used to think that whilst PEEL might be a huge waste of time, at least it could never be completely and totally fucking pointless, and boring. I think differently now, and I know more deeply than I did that ignorance truly is bliss.

[Reply #453 on:]

You should probably also get a haircut, castrate yourself, and donate your body to science. That way your genes won't be passed on, you'll advance the cause of human knowledge, and you won't look like a fucking hippy whilst you're doing it.

[Reply #454 on:]

What in the spiky, sweaty, claustrophobic hell for child molesters is a "burn warden" ?

[Reply #455 on:]

Whilst I find your overwhelming love for me slightly more flattering than creepy, save it until I'm actually elegible to win POTM, guys. Nominate somebody less deserving this month.

[Reply #456 on:]

This thread is for posts worthy of getting an individual nominated, regardless of whether or not that individual is eligible.

[Reply #457 on:]

I don't think we have quite enough photos of people sitting alone.

I agree we need to mix it up a bit. Why don't you draw a picture of yourself sitting alone?

[Reply #458 on:]

Personally, I think this is one of tallywhacker's better efforts. Anyone else amused?

Ahh, February. The crap month that everyone craps on by giving it a bunch of crap holidays that nobody gives a crap about.

Groundhog day! Because someone out there used to believe that a big fat rat was relevant to something in any way. The only good thing that ever came out of this "holiday" is a movie starring Bill Murray. This "holiday" gets the shortest writeup in this post, and it deserves it.

Abraham Lincoln's Birthday! Because dammit it's February and we need something to distract us from the crap winter weather that we're sick of by this point in the year. Let's "celebrate" the fact that he was born, instead of you know, one of his accomplishments or something. This is one of several "holidays" that you can't even really celebrate. If you say "Happy Abe Lincoln's Birthday" to the cashier at the grocery store, they're going to think you're retarded. And they'll be right, because nobody of normal intelligence actually thinks this day matters.

Valentine's Day! Buy useless crap for your significant other! If you don't, you're gonna be in deep crap! Make a baby now so your November-December holiday season will be crap! This special holiday combines the expenditure of time and energy and money on your significant other with the joylessness of fulfilling an obligation! And for some unaccountable reason, the price of flowers doubles during the week leading up to the holiday. Plus, everyone who's single or in a bad relationship feels even worse! And why the hell does valentine's Day get its own special candy? It's not thoughtful unless it's in the mass-produced pink box? Valentine's Day, you are a terrible, money grubbing, joy-destroying monster.

Presidents' Day? Why is this a holiday at all? Who the hell celebrates Presidents' Day? How do you even celebrate this? By getting a blowjob from a subordinate? Actually, that sounds pretty good to me. Let's just rename this one Blowjob Day. BJ Day. It even rhymes! It's only fair because we men spent all that money and effort pleasing your V on V-day last week. And those who didn't on account of being single could use some cheering up after how shitty being alone on V-day made them feel. BJs for everyone! Let's give February one single good point!

Mardi Gras! That's right - public nudity and profound drunkenness! The streets shall run with vomit and date-rape! Seriously, what the hell is with this holiday? It's not even excused by a major event like New Year's Eve or July 4th or anything. Freaking February, the month that encourages binge drinking and public self-degradation just so you can feel SOMETHING. In fact, Mardi Gras might be the only holiday that exists solely to scream an angry "up yours" to a religious holiday. I know Mardi Gras moves around the calendar to find and harass Ash Wednesday and make sure everyone feels like shit for the whole day on Ash wednesday, but having it in February just feels right. It's a holiday that needs counseling or Thorazine or something. Probably has serious daddy issues.

Ash Wednesday? What are you even doing here, Ash Wednesday? I know, I know, you're like, the gentleman adventurer of the holiday world, always traveling around the calendar. But seriously, February? You're slumming it this year. Whatever. At least I have an excuse to put dirt on my face. February makes me want to do that anyway.

George Washington's Birthday - Again, we're celebrating the fact that some guy got born. You know what? Everyone who's ever lived got born. I am SICK of February acting like birthdays are a big deal. At least Christmas has like, religious significance attached to the birth. Does anybody pray to George Washington? If they do, I want to meet them. And then slap them in the face. If there's a lot of them, they can all line up and I'll run down the line and slap them all in a row. Possibly squirt one in the eye too. He can be the leader of their stupid Washington cult.

And finally, we have leap-year-day-thing. My calendar doesn't actually list the 29th of February as a special occasion, but it is. The 29th is that special day when every four years, the rest of the calendar decides to jam an extra day up February's ass. And February takes it without complaint, probably just for the attention.

How about a new holiday? We can name it Seasonal Affective Disorder day. Everyone lines up at the morgue and shoots themselves because of how shitty this month is. Between being asked to celebrate a rodent, having your relationship (or lack thereof) subjected to the indignity of the obligatory sex holiday, and the fact that everyone in the northern hemisphere is sick and tired of all this snow BS and the only relief you get from the snow is when it turns into mud, I wouldn't be surprised if it DID have an abnormally high suicide rate.

The end.

[Reply #459 on:]

I wish I could rant on about useless garbage as well as that! Whenever I feel like I'm about to make a long post, it usually only ends up being a couple of paragraphs long.

[Reply #460 on:]

Maybe I was just really tired but this post (in context) made me laugh out loud:

"Table for one, please..."

[Reply #461 on:]

As one of the main indicators of funny around here (don't act so surprised) I do agree that that was worth the nomination.

[Reply #462 on:]

Funny. Most guys I know tend to be more interested in openings.

Giggity!

[Reply #463 on:]

By the same author as the Justin Bieber Show vid.

A lost 80s cartoon

I just saw this amazing film that you guys should really check out. It has loads of Futurama references in it.

I don't know about you guys, but I love the way cyber_turnip can rant or humiliate people. Even if it's me...He's just a great person.

[Reply #464 on:]

As much as I like Futurama, I don't like tattoos, so I wouldn't ever get something like that.

[Reply #465 on:]

I don't get it.

[Reply #466 on:]

"Hello Kitty brake sets... for people who drive like pussies.........literally"

Vaginas can drive now? This whole "women's rights" fad is getting out of hand.

This gave me a good laugh...

[Reply #467 on:]

I'm just starting to meet Gopher, and he's a great guy!

Danny really needs to win POTM...This is referring to Freako's "eFamily".

I'm gonna go get some fish from the old eBay.

Show spoiler

[Reply #468 on:]

Genesis 6:16.5 - And God said to build two of such arks, but He cautioned Noah, only mounteth thy naval cannon on one ark, verily.

[Reply #469 on:]

You could combine the final two. Murder Fermat's last prostitute. I'm sure that the quest will prove fruitless and yet entertaining as you set out to accomplish something exceptionally unusual.

[Reply #470 on:]

In reference to this:

Did he die?  Otherwise it is boring.

The duck knows comedy!

[Reply #471 on:]

Talking about Ralph...
 

Don't worry, if he seems like he's hitting on you, he's not...he's just looking for a new body to place his soul in. He does it every thousand years.

[Reply #472 on:]

I prefer to look at it the other way, with the zombie's head on the right side. Makes the 8 o'clock bulge more interesting.

Nice pic, but your nipples appear to be on fire despite the rain.  You should do something about that.

It was just a matter of time before danny started craving human flesh. Surely I'm not the only one who saw that coming?

[Reply #473 on:]

I'd get some General Tso's chicken, but my fortune cookie would probably have some bullshit like, "Things are looking up for tomorrow."

It should be noted that I'm nominating this from my iPhone in a bar. Thats worth 10 normal nominations.

Also, just saw how many times ive had posts posted lately. I feel so loved... :sniff: thanks!

[Reply #474 on:]

Discuss.

No.

[Reply #475 on:]

The release of Dead Island is sadder than the trailer.

[Reply #476 on:]

All of these pictures in this thread fill me with an awe inspiring feeling deep inside both my scrotum and rectum that causes me to yearn for a future horizon where all of the dreams ever held by humanity could be claimed truthfully for the innocence that spreads across our small beautiful world.

A small tear sheds from my eyes as I finally believe in the possibility of virtue in my fellow man.

Winna entered the photography thread, noticed a distinct lack of references to both the scrotum and the rectum, and remedied that problem. For that, I salute him.

[Reply #477 on:]

Doesn't he usually do that with every thread? I stopped noticing, heh.

[Reply #478 on:]

Yes I got a well done. In your face Hitler. lol

Simply because: WTF?

[Reply #479 on:]

In 17 Days I will have been a PEELer for 8 years! And in that time I have accomplished absolutely nothing, no POTMs or PEELies. I graduated high school and went to college but who gives a shit about that? On PEEL without noms, you are a nobody.

So I'm better than you? Wow.

You will never be better than me you adolescent twat.

Now there is a perfect reason to nominate Spacedal next month!