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PEEL - The Futurama Message Board    General Disscussion    A Modest Proposal « previous next »
Author Topic: A Modest Proposal  (Read 766 times)
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Kryten

Space Pope
****
« on: 01-28-2003 14:00 »

All this talk about letter-writing campaigns and picket marches... and whathas t accomplished? Two things: Jack, and Squat.

Now, these kinds of protest are all well and good in their own way, but I think we, as the loyal viewing audience, should give some serious thought to the idea of terrorist action.

Now, hear me out.

There are, currently, nearly 2000 PEELers. Of these, I'd say 200 post regularly. Now, if the movie Die Hard has taught us anything, it's that it only takes 12 people to seize control of a standard high-rise office building; surely, with 200 people at our disposal, we could easily take control of FOX headquarters.

Of course, we would need weapons. Luckily, here in America, guns are cheap, plentiful, and easy to aquire, unlike truly dangerous substances like beer. Ditto for ammunition.

With proper planning and preparation, we could commandeer FOX headquarters and capture the board of directors within a matter of hours. We will then hold them hostage until our demands are met, except for Rupert Murdoch and the guy who greenlit Joe Millionaire. They will be shot on sight.

Now, some of you might think this sounds extreme, but I believe that, if done right, it can be pulled off with a minimum of bloodshed.

Thoughts?

Loki

Professor
*
« Reply #1 on: 01-28-2003 14:12 »

maybe, better organize attack through internet... let's say a Doom Day for all FOX network? Because some PEElers technically could not come to US.
blahness

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #2 on: 01-28-2003 14:14 »

one key thing you are forgetting is that in die hard all the employees were on the same floor in the same room due to a holiday party much easier to contain everyone when they are already in one location
Zed 85

Space Pope
****
« Reply #3 on: 01-28-2003 15:00 »

Gneesh Kryters this is what I've been saying we should do for ages!
homerjaysimpson

Space Pope
****
« Reply #4 on: 01-28-2003 15:07 »

I say we all fart on Rupert Murdoch head.
Juliet

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #5 on: 01-28-2003 15:28 »

I say we go to the fox's studio and office and piss all over their stuff, maybe their heads.

]PaulFSAC[

Professor
*
« Reply #6 on: 01-28-2003 15:48 »

Readies (and programs them to target fox HQ) a few ICBM's be found and hovers his finger over the red button, just in case.

Click me!
                                                                                     
Thanks To Daniela for the new block.
FSAC is not just about my art, it's for the fans, any art or fictions will be gratefully received.  I'm not going to go on forever, so if I stop, then without support the site would stop, wish will be a great shame, since it seems to have some popularity

RETIRED AVATAR KING - hopefully custom rank will return one day
evan

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #7 on: 01-28-2003 16:24 »

Sure, it sounds fine now, but are new episodes of Futurama worth going to jail for? Yes.  evil laugh

Bender: "Try this, kids at home!
Warning: do not try this at home
Stuart B

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #8 on: 01-28-2003 16:47 »

All the UK PEELers could be organised into some kind of Rupert Murdoch sunset squad
iliketowankalot

Professor
*
« Reply #9 on: 01-28-2003 17:38 »

While we're at it we might as well demand 100 billion dollars, we even got german members like Marc who can make our terrorist speechs for us and just to be on the safe side I think we should kill Bruce Willis first.
totalnerd undercanada

DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #10 on: 01-28-2003 17:43 »

I'm in. Just let me know when you want me, and provide me witha false passport, plane tickets, and three jamaican hookers. I'll take the first six floors, and when they're secure you go up above me, whilst I take the lift above you and take the eighth. Then we proceed in that fashion to the top.

Come to hink of it, I'll also need a gun, but they flow like water in the US so that part should be easy  big grin
aslate

Space Pope
****
« Reply #11 on: 01-28-2003 18:06 »

Hmm, anyone here good at hacking?
I'm not, so that means i need paid travel to the USA, guns, some more hookers (but TNUKs could share) and anything else that may be destructive.
Loki

Professor
*
« Reply #12 on: 01-29-2003 00:04 »

There's but one detail you all forgot about. It's HE. and he is Bruce Willis. You don't even have a chance!
Spice Weasel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #13 on: 01-29-2003 00:27 »

I have a shed full of sodium nitrate and diesel oil.

*Gets out the yellow pages. Hmmm, Ryder, Ryder, Ryder...Here it is*
CyberKnight

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #14 on: 01-29-2003 05:41 »

How about hacking into the FOX scheduling file, and scheduling non-stop Futurama for the forseeable future (starting with the unaired episodes, of course)  wink. Then we set the "read-only" restriction and change all their computers to run a Japanese version of UNIX! Thus, the high-level FOX brains would be foiled! MWAHAHAHAHAAH!

Or, we could organise a daring midnight raid to get the episodes on elephant back (and no, it's not the stupidest idea I ever heard  wink).
FilthyCrab

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #15 on: 01-29-2003 08:15 »

Thank God you were only talking about terrorist action Kryters.  For a minute there, I thought you were going to offer a traditional Irish menu for us.

As for attacking FOX, sounds about right.  We wouldn't actually have to kill Bruce Willis first, just send Demi (Dummy?) Moore over for a reconciliation "get-together" which should keep them both out of our hair for the duration of our "work"

First course of action should be to "liberate" the Futurama episodes they continue to hold. 

After that, we force them to agree to air (at a reasonable time) all remaining episodes of the series (we give them copies of the originals for this purpose).

Then we force the bastards to order about a ga-jillion new episodes of Futurama, keeping Matt and the rest busy for years to come.

Next, we ensure that FOX either airs all these new episodes, or else they go to the next highest bidder for immediate release, Fox seeing no profit from this exchange.

Finally, we rid the planet of Rupert and his team of idiots network programmers.  They've done no good, and there is no hope that they ever will.

After that, it's out for a round of sodas and we all stay up to read about our good works in the morning papers.

Or we all die trying...
(Hmm, maybe we should think about this, just a little bit more)
PCC Fred

Space Pope
****
« Reply #16 on: 01-29-2003 10:22 »

How about we call the A Team?  FOX can lock them in a tool shed, and 10 minutes later they'll have converted a couple of plant pots and a lead pipe into 22 brand new episodes.
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #17 on: 01-29-2003 12:39 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by FilthyCrab:
Thank God you were only talking about terrorist action Kryters.  For a minute there, I thought you were going to offer a traditional Irish menu for us.


Um.... yeah...

*hides the buffet, Swiftly*

Nixorbo

UberMod
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #18 on: 01-29-2003 13:25 »

Jonathan Swift you ain't, Kryten.
Mitsui

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #19 on: 01-29-2003 14:35 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Juliet:
I say we go to the fox's studio and office and piss all over their stuff, maybe their heads.


If she's going to be pissing count me out.  tongue


Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #20 on: 01-29-2003 16:41 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by Nixorbo:
Jonathan Swift you ain't, Kryten.

Good... I bet he's pretty damn decomposed by now.

Carbito

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #21 on: 01-30-2003 01:34 »

lol, your all nuts...we should just steal a fighter jet and blow up Fox with a missile  big grin
Stuart B

Starship Captain
****
« Reply #22 on: 01-30-2003 04:45 »

Nah, that's too quick.... they need to suffer the same fate as the show I think, for ironys sake...

A long drawn out death over many, many months.
FilthyCrab

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #23 on: 01-30-2003 07:53 »

^ During which period of suffering, they are seldom seen.  Good thinking.
Erdrik

Professor
*
« Reply #24 on: 01-31-2003 02:28 »

you think hitting the Fox Hq is going to hurt them?!
Come on hit 'im where it hurts!
We all know Rupert and all his ape brained allies only care about money.
Screw bombing and such, I say we need a virus that will transfer the funds in their accounts /sell their stocks bonds, and spread it through out the world helping all the needy...
...
...
Or slowly leaking it into our own accounts.
Actualy yeah thats sounds better, cuase then We could by Fox and set it up as the worlds first 'Channel deticated soley to Futurama'!!  big grin

Call me Erdrik

Boycott Fox!! Down with the Evil OverLords!!
ZombieJesus

Lost Belgian
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #25 on: 01-31-2003 15:12 »

Some pranks.
A variation on the classic dog turd in a burning paper bag:
Take small a board with a nail on which you stick the dog turd. Put this in the bag. Light.  If they stamp on the bag, they 'll get the nail in their foot and the wound will get infected.

Spread small amounts of coke in the toilets of FOX buildings, and then anonimously inform the police.

Go to a butcher's shop, tell him you need bones for your dog or for your biology class or something.
Put those in the airconditioning system. After a couple of days it 'll start to stink up the place.


   

Gocad

Space Pope
****
« Reply #26 on: 01-31-2003 15:54 »

An attempt to save Futurama by using excessive violence? Count me in.


I'm watching you. Yes, YOU!
winna

Avatar Czar
DOOP Ubersecretary
**
« Reply #27 on: 01-31-2003 16:50 »

If I've learned anything from Futurama, it's that all you need to take out Fox is a misplaced beer...  It at least I'd think it was a beer. :shiftyeyes:
Oh and while we're at it, we oughta get Family Guy back, I loved that show.
iliketowankalot

Professor
*
« Reply #28 on: 01-31-2003 19:36 »

Quiet you, this board is for Futurama worshipers only, thou shall not worship false shows
Spice Weasel

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #29 on: 01-31-2003 23:56 »
« Last Edit on: 01-31-2003 23:56 »

Ah, Zeej.  Your intentions are good, but you lack the killer instinct.  As far as practical jokes go, Viagra in the water supply would be a good start, failing that.  Modified Anthrax (for duck hunting)
BendingUnit1141

Professor
*
« Reply #30 on: 02-01-2003 00:09 »
« Last Edit on: 02-01-2003 00:09 »

I'll send the letterbombs..
Nurdbot

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #31 on: 02-01-2003 01:35 »

Woah,I never expected planned attacks against an American company when I joined.I'm in.
VRRR

Crustacean
*
« Reply #32 on: 02-01-2003 21:24 »

We wont have to worry about Bruce Willis, so long as we avoid attacking at Xmas!!!
PCC Fred

Space Pope
****
« Reply #33 on: 02-01-2003 21:25 »

If you want to distract Bruce Willis, send Cybill Shepard into the building first.
CyberKnight

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #34 on: 02-02-2003 04:34 »

Heheheh.  wink.

We'll need a pretext to distract the authorities from our real goal, as well. Something so ludicrous and absurb only the FBi would believe it  wink. How about demanding King of the Hill is renewed for another 20 years?  wink.
Gilthanas

Poppler
*
« Reply #35 on: 02-02-2003 10:24 »

Whoah. Attacking company HQ sounds good to me.
I guess that's what my 1 year tour in Finnish
army trainded me to do: attack office buildings
like 20th Century FOX hq. I'm in!
futureman

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #36 on: 02-02-2003 11:59 »
« Last Edit on: 02-02-2003 11:59 »

I think Krysten really wants this to happen. If there are any advanced webpage hackers here that would help get over fox. You could edit the site to protest against FOX and all stuff like that
That is the closest i can get as i live in the uk along with alot of other people from peel. I would be in otherwise.
ZombieJesus

Lost Belgian
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #37 on: 02-02-2003 13:29 »

 
Quote
Originally posted by futureman:
...Krysten

Are you suicidal?
Nixorbo

UberMod
DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #38 on: 02-02-2003 13:46 »
« Last Edit on: 02-02-2003 13:46 »

EVERYONE HIT THE DECK!
::Hides behind couch::
iliketowankalot

Professor
*
« Reply #39 on: 02-02-2003 14:44 »

I used to think Krysten was a chick when I first cum on peel cos he has a girly name, a girly avatar and his favourite movie is the Princess Bride, I mean Cum on, what are newbies supposed to think
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