Best Futurama Quotes

[Reply #480 on:]

"go fish jerk"


my first TOTP ? weeeeeeeee !!!

[Reply #481 on:]

"Hey, I calls them like I sees them. I'm a whale biologist."

[Reply #482 on:]

"Who needs courage when you have a gun?"

[Reply #483 on:]

Well i have no other plans today, lets go get drunk.

[Reply #484 on:]

Anthology Of Interest I

Zoidberg : "So, now *Zoidberg* is big, huh? That's more like it!  Who's intimidating who *now*, big city?"

[Reply #485 on:]

Tv announcer: "This week on "The Real World: the Sun""
Contestant: "Aaaaaaaahhhhhh! I'M BURNING TO DEATH!!!"

[Reply #486 on:]

[Fry gets new hands grafted on, after a mishap while feeding a T-Rex]
Fry: Hey these new hands are great, im gonna break-them-in tonight.

[Reply #487 on:]

I have two favourites-both from Roswell that ends well.
1.(Fry puts metal in the microwave and everything turns blue) "What smells like blue??"
2. (Fry "saves" his "grandfather's" life)
Fry: Are you crazy?  You almost got yourself run over!!!!
Enus: Gee...I sure am lucky you pushed me on to this pile of rusty bayonets!!!

[Reply #488 on:]

From Fry and the Slurm Factory:
"Who are those horrible orange creatures over there?"
"Why, those are the Grunka-Lunkas! They work here in the Slurm factory."
"Tell them I hate them!"

[Reply #489 on:]

"Are you coming on to me"
"What poppycock"
"I don't hear a no!"
form roswell that ends well
ZOIDBERG ROCKS!

[Reply #490 on:]

"Hot crackers! I take offense to that!"

Nobody ever said "What poppycock."

[Reply #491 on:]

From the sting:
Leela : Bender, quick, waggle something!
Bender : Bzzzz(Hello), Bzzzzz(Fellow), Bzzz(Bees). Bzz'z (How's)Bzz (The) Bzzzzzz(Abdomen)? Bzzzzzz (Swollen) Bzzz (With) Bzzzzz (Nectar), Bz (I) Bzzzz (Trust)?
Bee : Bzz (Duh!)
Later on....
Bender : Hurry up lady, [beelanguage]I'm Sick of shakin' my booty for these fat jerks![/beelanguage]
<Bees Get annoyed>
Bender : I didnt mean your all fat, [beelanguage]Just fasto there[/beelanguage]
Bees : He insulted our fat queen!
Queen Bee : You try keeping your figure after 10000 kids!

That entire scene is good, and to a slightly lesser extent is the whole episode as well.

[Reply #492 on:]

from "A Pharoah to Remember"

Osiris 4 Official: Great Wall of Prophecy, reveal to us God's will so that we may blindly obey.
Wall Worshipers: Free us from thought and responsibility.
Osiris 4 Official: We shall read things off you...
Wall Worshipers: ...and do them.
Osiris 4 Official: You're words guide us.
Wall Worshipers: We're dumb.


i think trhats cool to

[Reply #493 on:]

also i like ohhh i tell you later

[Reply #494 on:]

Yo, canned eggs, mind using a different avatar?  I've had this one for a while now.

[Reply #495 on:]

I don't mind, it's just... canned eggs, you know?  If they had the crate of canned eggs, that would be perfect...

Edit: just waiting for Drippy to upload me a new avatar...

Edit: ...there we go.  Cool, huh?

[Reply #496 on:]

(Professor Paradox)

Amy: Isn't that Right Professor Freaksworth

(300 Big Ones)

Whale Biologist: Your swimsuit suck ... Whale Biologiset.

URL: Listen to him, ... he's a Whale Biologist!

-----------------------------

New Futurama Episodes in England!

Sunday 29th June 2003: Professors Paradox(7pm)
Sunday 6th  July 2003: 300 Big Ones (7pm)

Only on Sky One

[Reply #497 on:]

Like a balloon and...something bad happens!

[Reply #498 on:]

"Three Hundred Big Boys"

Golf Caddy: Perhaps yorr your grip sir?

Zoidberg: oh why thank you golf slave.

[Reply #499 on:]

I don't go anywhere without my mutated Anthrax... for duck-huntin'. 

[Reply #500 on:]

PE Ship: "Oooops! Soooorry. Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-...."
(After decapitating Bender)

[Reply #501 on:]

Fry: Why couldn't she be the other kind of mermaid with the fish part on the top and the lady part on the bottem!

[Reply #502 on:]

Still my favorite:

Bender: I think I got whiplash!
Leela: You can't have whiplash, you don't have a neck.
Bender: I meant ass whiplash.

Just remembered:
Farnsworth: Choke on that, causality!

[Reply #503 on:]

Another good one from "Where No Fan has Gone Before"

Koenig - when we woke up, we had these bodies
Fry - Say it in Russian!
Koenig (flatly, bored) -ven ve voke up ve had zees ... wodies.
Fry (happily) - EEEEEEEEE! now say "Nuclear Wessels"
Koenig - No!

I think Fry's enthusiastic EEEEE! makes the quote all the funnier

[Reply #504 on:]

Ooo I just remembered a good one:

"You watched it, You can't unwatch it! Stay tuned for more TALES OF INTEREST!"

[Reply #505 on:]

Jack Johnson: "It's time someone had the courage to stand up and say: 'I'm against those things that everybody hates!'"
John Jackson: "Now, I respect my opponent. I think he's a good man, but quite frankly, I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING HE JUST SAID!"
A Head in the Polls
-------------------------------------------
Leela: It was all my fault! He died because of me!
Farnsworth: No, no, no, no, no, no.... (yelling to Bender) I'm lying to make her feel better!
The Sting

[Reply #506 on:]

Fry: "It's different now!  Before, she was just controlling and possessive.  But now she tells me what to do and wants to be with me all the time."
-The Cryogenic Woman

Zapp: "Now there's a path of destruction that's easy on the eyes"
-I Dated a Robot

(sorry if the wording isn't perfect, but you get the idea)

[Reply #507 on:]

Nixon: If something needs rubbing, think Shankman.

[Reply #508 on:]

Leela: Fry, nobody wants to say anything, but you're covered in bed sores.
Fry: Not covered.

Can I note, Davids is freaking me out. Not only did he use my avatar, but despite joining after me he now outranks me and therefore has more right to it. Should I give it up, or just post millions of ... err, posts, to outdo him? Not that I have anything against him personally, I mean, he has great taste in avatars ...

[Reply #509 on:]

Package delivery has nothing to do with the delivery business! Image, people, _image_ !!
- Futurestocks

[Reply #510 on:]

"Outrageous, I was going to eat that mummy!"

[Reply #511 on:]

Bender: "These balls are making me testy! If they don't stop bounching and jiggling, I swear I'm gonna shove this treaty up their.... wait a second. Where do you shove things up a ball?"
Kissinger: "This isn't a productive area of discussion."

[Reply #512 on:]

*After Leela kicks the Professor into the man eating anteater pit*

Professor: You've killed me! You've killed me!
Leela: Oh my god, what have I done?
Professor: I've just told you! You've killed me!

Anthology of Interest 1

[Reply #513 on:]

Sorry if these have already been posted, I couldn't be bothered to read through 13 pages to check.

Zoidburg: You don't want to end up old and lonely like ZOIDBURG *cries and then stops suddenly* You were saying?

Leela: *Puts hand in fire* Ow! Fire hot!
Professor: Don't worry professy will get it! *Puts hand in fire* Ow! Fire indeed hot!

[Reply #514 on:]

Bender Gets Made
Farnsworth: "That steamed carrot was a bit spicey for me."

[Reply #515 on:]

"The Loot, The Loot, The Loot Is On Fire"

"And If we don't want to pay our taxes, Why were free to spend a week with the pain monster"

"Good evening ignorent pigs, put down your crack pipes and Beer bongs and pay attention"

"Now for the old John Q Nixon, there no major crack ups"

"Storm the place, without my prior knowledge"
- All Nixon, the great Nixon!!

"I want this sent for study at area 51"
"But thats where we're building the fake moon landing set."
The we will really have to land on the moon, Invent Nasa and tell them t get off their fanies"
- The greatest for them all, President Truman!!

[Reply #516 on:]

Sorry if these were posted before, I read the entire thread (and got a few laughs) but didn't notice these. Anyway, anything involving the denizens of Omicron Persei 8 is pretty funny.

"This is the most foolish of Earth programs! Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?" "Perhaps they're saving that for Sweeps."

(the whole ensuing "I WUV U" heart-candy delivery fiasco is hilarious as well).

Or after Fry fails to destroy his spaceship: "Haha! Instead of shooting where I was, you should have shot where I was going to be!"

---

Morbo on Elzar's cooking show: So Elzar, what will you be cooking for Morbo to devour with his mighty jaws?
Elzar: Morbo, I'm gonna whip you up a nice un-speakable creature of horror, with mango chutney!
Morbo: [to audience]  Pathetic humans! Prepare to write down the recipe!


Oh, and hello everyone.   

[Reply #517 on:]

oops, double post...

[Reply #518 on:]

Welcome to PEEL, Slashco. Enjoy it here.

Bender: "Listen, you fat internet nerd!"
Kidnappster Geek: "Listening."

[Reply #519 on:]

Roseanne: Here's a fun definiton.
Idiot, noun. You!