I've still got nothing decent, but to make life easier for futz:
Elzar: See? If you pet the spice weasel's butt, it goes up really high!
Bender: This weasel still isn't fresh enough!
Elzar: But... but it's alive!
Bender: Not alive enough!!!
Elzar: For the last time, this is how you refill the spice weasel. First, you lift it's tail up...
Elzar: Would you like me to freshen up your… er, date? No, seriously. A couple of blasts from this baby [pets his weasel] will take 15 years off her, easy.
Elzar: Uh, Bender, why the heck you datin' that old bag?
Bender: She wanted to go out to dinner, and I couldn't help myself. She said those three little words.
Elzar: "I love you"?
Bender: "Senior citizen discount".
Bender: "I told you I didn't want to see it make a star!"
Elzar: "This is your date? What are you, high? Or just stupid?"
Bender: "For your information, yes, as a matter of fact, I am."
Elzar: Stop threatening me with your "I know a food inspector" talk, Bender, or you'll be seeing stars.Also, since we missed the new thread title discussion this time around, I'll happily change this one for something more awesome.
Haddie: From the weaselmajigger?
Haddie: I see what you what-cha-call-it... did there.