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Author Topic: Come on, Bender, jack a grab.  (Read 33090 times)
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DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« on: 12-28-2007 01:13 »

 
Quote
Frisco's grab:

Leela: We're just saying the "Andy Sipowicz Guide to Style" probably isn't the best book on the subject.
Fry: But it was the thinnest.
futz
Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #1 on: 12-28-2007 08:00 »

Leela: You're in charge today just because you're the Professor's Uncle.

Fry: Works for me (burrrp!). What's you're beef?

Leela: I found out that that Dr. Zoidberg and Amy make way more than I do. I mean com'mon I'm a county certified starship captain, she's just an intern.

Fry: Well, the good doctor here keeps me supplied with happy pills.

Dr. Z.: Wahoo!

Leela: But Amy? I mean com'mon! I'm a county certified starship captain, she's just an intern.

Fry: Oh, well... Amy puts out.
Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #2 on: 12-28-2007 08:11 »
« Last Edit on: 12-28-2007 08:11 »

Leela: Fry, wearing a shirt and tie doesn't automatically make you more mature.

Zoidberg: Actually, several medical-type studies have shown that it does!

Amy: Yeah, I think they were the same ones that said boots and spandex make you bossy.

Leela: *nudges Amy off the edge of the table*
LayZ341

Professor
*
« Reply #3 on: 12-28-2007 13:21 »

Fry: ..And then I told those so called "stock holders" what else they could hold. They threatened to sell and I said "Go ahead, its a buyers market anyways!" I'm the boss I know what I'm doing. And if I don't, it doesn't matter cause I'm the BOSS.

Leela: *sighs*
BenderīsRevenge

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #4 on: 12-29-2007 13:30 »

Leela: Fry, while your attempt to be more responsible is cute, it won't mean anything if we don't go deliver today's package.
Fry: Ah, can't we just leave it for the night crew?
Leela: There isn't a night crew...
Amy: Unless you count Zoidberg.
Fry: Yeah!  Make Zoidberg do it!
Zoidberg opens his mouth to object but is cutoff by Leela
Leela: No, it's our jo...  Actually, if Zoidberg did it, I could go deordorize my boots.
Amy: And I could go get the facial and colonic irrigation I've been meaning to do.
Fry: And I could go watch TV or something!
Leela: Yeah, Zoidberg, stop being so lazy and get back to work!
Leela, Fry, and Amy all leave giving Zoidberg dirty looks.
Zoidberg: (hangs head) Aaoooh...
KurtPikachu2001

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #5 on: 12-29-2007 15:35 »

Fry:  Hi, guys.  Anyone care to join me for a beer?

Leela:  Fry, that's not a beer you're drinking!

Fry:  Yes it is.  It says so on the bottle.

Amy:  Looks can be deceiving.   

Leela:  Just because it looks like a beer bottle, doesn't mean it is.

Fry:  Okay, then, what am I drinking then?

Zoidberg:  You're drinking robot oil! 

Fry:  *spits*! *gag*! *retch*!

Amy:  We told you so! 

Fry runs out of the room, Zoidberg goes after him.

Zoidberg:  Wait up, Fry!  I'm a doctor!  I'll get you some ipecac! 

 
SonicPanther

Professor
*
« Reply #6 on: 12-29-2007 23:09 »

Leela: Fry, you put on a tie and turned your room into an office. That doesn't make you a business owner.
Fry: Well, I've seen it on TV before. All I have to do is say I own a company, and watch people complain. Then I'll be rich!
Leela: Yes, but you can't do that if you don't have employees first.
Frisco17

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #7 on: 12-29-2007 23:33 »

Thanks for making a new thread Doc.

Futz's and Sine Wave's are both hilarious but I declare the winner to be.....Sine Wave because I could actually see that one happening.
Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #8 on: 12-30-2007 13:24 »

SonicPanther

Professor
*
« Reply #9 on: 12-30-2007 14:49 »
« Last Edit on: 12-30-2007 14:49 »

Fry: This place is pretty nice. What's the rent?
Guy: Oh, you do'nt need to pay rent. Just provide your... services... monthly.
Fry: Wow, great! ... Hey wait, i see where you're looking at me buddy.
Guy: Ohh, um...
Fry: I know I have great shoes, but if  they're what you want, they're not for sale.
i_c_weiner

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #10 on: 12-30-2007 14:54 »

Bender: Wait! What's that purple spot on the wall?
Guy: What purple-- it's never been there before...
Leela: Oh, that's me.
Bender: Oh, now I see you. Your ugly jacket blended into these ugly walls. {to Guy} It brings the place character.
LayZ341

Professor
*
« Reply #11 on: 12-30-2007 23:04 »

Guy: Sir, will your girlfriend be moving in too?

Leela: Come on Fry, lets go.  You don't want to buy an apartment from a crazy man.
Bendersfan1221

Space Pope
****
« Reply #12 on: 12-31-2007 00:16 »
« Last Edit on: 12-31-2007 00:16 »

Leela: You know flirting with Fry wont get me to buy this appartment.
Guy: You want to buy this appartment? I should get the other associate then.
Fry: Other associate? Pfff, can't handle a lady like Leela.
Bender: Fry you better get away from him unless your interested in guys. My Gaydar is going nuts!
futz
Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #13 on: 12-31-2007 10:12 »

Fry: I get the feeling you don't want to rent to us.

Guy: Um, er...

Leela: Oh, boy. Here we go again.

Guy: We prefer to rent to a more, ah... typical clientel. Three people just isn't a normal family unit. If you just had one or two more life forms in your group, or a donkey.

Fry: Maybe Dr. Zoid-...

Bender, Leela: No!

Guy: I'm sorry.
bobbot

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #14 on: 12-31-2007 11:08 »
« Last Edit on: 12-31-2007 11:08 »

Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #15 on: 12-31-2007 12:14 »

Agent: ...Then they stripped me of my gold jacket when I gave away the three secrets of real estate.
Fry: You mean, "Location, location, location"?
Agent: You don't have to rub it in.
BenderīsRevenge

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #16 on: 12-31-2007 17:12 »
« Last Edit on: 12-31-2007 17:12 »

Realtor: I'm glad you all like it.  It's just too bad...
Leela: Too bad about what?
Realtor: What...?  I wasn't going to say anything about the previous tenants being torn to shreds in their sleep by the murderous phantom that lives in the basement!
Fry: By torn to shreds, do you mean enough so they won't come back as zombies?
Realtor: No, there was enough of them left to haunt the halls at night.
Bender: Damn, we almost found the perfect apartment...
Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #17 on: 01-01-2008 15:44 »

LayZ341 wins.
LayZ341

Professor
*
« Reply #18 on: 01-01-2008 17:12 »

Frisco17

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #19 on: 01-01-2008 17:21 »
« Last Edit on: 01-01-2008 17:21 »

Amy: "Zoiberg's gonna be sooo mad. HEHEHE"

Fry: "HAHAHA. Yeah, I can't believe we got away with the eggs."

Amy: "Wait. These are Zoidbergs eggs right?"

Fry: "Yeah."

Amy: "But Zoidberg's a male. So how did....."

Fry and Amy: "GAAAAAHHHH!" (Throws eggs)
BenderīsRevenge

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #20 on: 01-01-2008 21:32 »

Fry: Wow, Amy!  This is a really hard grab to caption!
Amy: Spluh!  It's suppose to be difficult.
Uncomfortable silence.
Fry: While we're waiting for someone to write something funny, wanna make out?
Amy: Sure, but if someone catches us, you were just helping find the contact lens I swallowed.
Fry: Wouldn't be the first time...
futz
Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #21 on: 01-01-2008 22:20 »

Fry: See, told ya!

Amy: You were right. We've been in here three whole days and no one's bugged us.

Fry & Amy: Hee, hee, snicker...

Hermes: (Through door.) Good morning Professor, Happy Monday.
DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #22 on: 01-02-2008 00:15 »

Fry: So, when Hermes comes in to get a can of stapler chow, we hit him with these water balloons.
Amy: Yeah, he'll get the supplies...the supplies of his rife!
Fry: Wait a minute, is that cool?
Amy: Spluh, I'm Chinese.  I'm allowed to do Chinese stereotypes.
Fry: Hmm...maybe we should check with Chinese Jesse Jackson.
Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #23 on: 01-02-2008 00:21 »

Fry and Amy find Hermes's 'secret stash.'
Kryten

Space Pope
****
« Reply #24 on: 01-02-2008 16:59 »

^He wins.
SonicPanther

Professor
*
« Reply #25 on: 01-02-2008 19:07 »

I don't get it...Please don't hit me.
km73

Space Pope
****
« Reply #26 on: 01-02-2008 23:51 »

Stash = probably the stuff Hermes had to flush.
Sine Wave

Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #27 on: 01-03-2008 00:20 »

Indeed. Also, I'm going to be gone for a week as of Friday, so if I do happen to win someone else can take it.
LayZ341

Professor
*
« Reply #28 on: 01-03-2008 20:06 »

Frisco17 wins.
Frisco17

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #29 on: 01-04-2008 13:21 »

AAAHAHAHA! Bask in my reflected glory mortals. Anyway here we go.

bobbot

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #30 on: 01-04-2008 13:36 »

This ought to draw him out of his shell
soylentOrange

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #31 on: 01-04-2008 13:50 »

Bender: *beeps and whistles like R2-D2*

Fry: "Leela, it's not right to make bender humiliate himself by making him do impressions for beer."

Zoidberg: "Why not?  The robut does it to me all the time!"
futz
Liquid Emperor
**
« Reply #32 on: 01-04-2008 13:57 »

Fry: Jeez Leela, I never saw Bender recoil from a beer before. What did you do?

Leela: He's just embrassed. He didn't know all bending units are equipped with a bottle opener. I guess I startled him when I used it.

Fry: Gosh, I don't see it. Is it on his head?

Leela: Other end.
BenderīsRevenge

Bending Unit
***
« Reply #33 on: 01-04-2008 14:19 »

Fry: What's the matter with Bender?

Leela: He must have walked in on us having sex last night and went into shock.  Come on Bender, there's a nice beer for you if you come out.

Bender: (muffled) No!  What I saw wasn't natural!  You know how I feel about shifting paradigms!
Frisco17

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #34 on: 01-04-2008 19:48 »

Not gonna decide until I see a few more but Futz and Bender'sRevenge are neck and neck. Both freakin' hilarious.
DrThunder88

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #35 on: 01-05-2008 04:45 »

Fry: See?  I came in and found Bender all shrinky and flaccid.  What should we do?
Leela: Don't worry, we'll give him some robot Viagra.  He'll be be back in 40 minutes.
coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #36 on: 01-05-2008 05:53 »

The Z-List celebrity cast of Futurama tried to make a little extra money by agreeing to promote domestic beer on a SuperBowl commercial, but Bender developed an unexpected bout of stage fright...

Leela: When we get back from a long space mission, there's nothing better than a cool refreshing bottle of..."

Director: (off camera) Cut! Cut! The robot's hiding inside his own torso again...

Fry: Bender, come on... you've been on TV lots of times.

Bender: (muffled) But I haven't got my makeup on...!
KurtPikachu2001

Urban Legend
***
« Reply #37 on: 01-05-2008 19:31 »

Fry:  What's wrong, Bender?

Bender:  Flexo beat me at a game of ping pong and disgraced me all television! 

Leela:  Here's something that will make you feel better, how about a beer?

Bender:  No!  I'm never showing my face in public again!  I'll just spend the rest of my life as a sober hermit!

Leela:  You need beer!  Why don't you challange Flexo to a rematch?

Fry:  She's right!  If you beat him you can get your revenge!

Bender:  No!  Never!  Go away!  (sobbing)

Zoidberg:  And you people think I have issues! 
Frisco17

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #38 on: 01-05-2008 21:36 »

The winner is Bender'sRevenge.
coldangel

DOOP Secretary
*
« Reply #39 on: 01-05-2008 21:47 »

I will have my revenge on Bender'sRevenge!
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