Game: Decrypt this!

[Reply #720 on:]

TOTPD!  Yahoo!

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BUT THERE WAS THIS GANG OF 10-YEAR OLDS WITH GUNS. EXACTLY, YOU'RE IN L.A.

   

RTWETV XZULEYU R DLZB DLEYKQ DVPYOV R XVRBET RTQ MZOV XZKQKW ZTUE ULV RZO.

[Reply #721 on:]

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Anyone without a ship should secure a weapon and fire wildly into the air.

 

EPBR PIMB FCWP SBFABWE LUS EPB AXIGBE.

WRGEPNI CFBO EU OSNGD FXCST.

Use Gopher’s handy tool to make your life easier!

[Reply #722 on:]

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they have such respect for the planet.

Cynthia used to drink slurm.

 

UD, XCKFCO. PUA FBFK'L LUAID LDC IOAZDBKNLUO, FBF PUA?

UT IUAOZC KUL. N ENFP LDNL TBKC PUA QULLN OUWNKIC TBOZL.

[Reply #723 on:]

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OH, BENDER. YOU DIDN'T TOUCH THE CRUSHINATOR, DID YOU? OF COURSE NOT. A LADY THAT FINE YOU GOTTA ROMANCE FIRST.

 

OCZ TSPADF PS CL E OCZDR PS. DCV PZHM OCZDRST, PADF OCZ. USTMEUQ SWSD E HCZUBS CL OSETQ CBFST.

[Reply #724 on:]

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Took me a few tries; I guessed "you" early on but just couldn't come up with the word "young"...
"You remind me of a young me. Not much younger, mind you. Perhaps even a couple of years older."

 

NGBA, VRAAZGAHGBV, RA'CC WA ZFA VZKGEZAVZ OSKABZV AYAK. BUR, CAZ'V SCC FSYA VUDA ZAIMGCS ZU EACAWKSZA!

[Reply #725 on:]

Yeah, I wasn't sure if that last one I posted would be difficult or not. 

New Rank: Yea! I'm a delivery boy! (sorry couldn't resist)

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FINE, SWEETIEKINS, WE'LL BE THE STRICTEST PARENTS EVER. NOW, LET'S ALL HAVE SOME TEQUILA TO CELEBRATE!

   

LTF ETWEZAF EXTS, WSF U FXS'G EWTA,
JAAJW ETWEZAF EXTS, U QGUJJ FXS'G EWTA,
PASFAT ETWEZAF EXTS, WSF KA UQ OTAWG!
GWIA GKWG, FXV QGVMUF EXTS.

[Reply #726 on:]

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Fry cracked corn, and I don't care,
Leela cracked corn, I still don't care,
Bender cracked corn, and he is great!
Take that, (y)ou stupid corn.

(that last 'y' turned out as a 'd')
That one was pretty easy once I recognised the pattern.

 

FM, WFOB! MTSTQP TY XWKXVY YNUM X YGOXTQ FQ GMA ENGGFUSY.

[Reply #727 on:]

Oops,  apparently I replaced both the 'Y's and 'D's with 'F's.  Sorry about that. 

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OH, LORD! HIKING IS ALWAYS SUCH A STRAIN ON THE BUTTOCKS.

 

Q FMXP WA YCDAWO GPPIQWOY AWP UML AD CFP ACFPD.

I'm not sure if this one will be too short.  If so I'll give a hint.

[Reply #728 on:]

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I have no strong feelings one way or the other. 

I'm in again :-)

 

VPZ, Y ZPP. ZOHPMFYRL YRNODNYRL MFKM HKRV WYL UOJEZ QOTDE PKZYDV EPZMKWYDYZP MYHP YMZPDA.

[Reply #729 on:]

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Yes, I see. Something involving that many big words could easily destabilise time itself.

ZJJHAJUYA BHYBDH YQ AHV AHV KYGX,
IJYB ZPJUAC IY IJLBUR!

[Reply #730 on:]

Man that one was hard!

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Using 'YQ and 'IY' I came up with a set of distinct possibilities, then tried different ones until one looked promising.  I want to hit myself over the head for not recognizing New New York right away.  I kept thinking what word can be repeated after itself in a sentence, and all I kept coming up with was "had had".


ATTENTION PEOPLE OF NEW NEW YORK, STOP ACTING SO STUPID!

   

ZIGR UCTF IM SHGGH-EINRWRF GRLPHTCLHK GITZYRW, NCYP MWRRNHO IT-WHGEZ MIW HWGZ HTF H PRHWY HZ XKHLU HZ LIHK...

[Reply #731 on:]

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Some kind of gamma-powered mechanical monster  with   
freeway on-ramps for arms and a heart as black as coal... 
After I figured the "as"s out, I guessed the "as black as coal", but I couldn't remember the whole quote, so I really had to do it letter-by-letter ;-)

Not sure which one to take... ah, the long one:
 

X'M UC SWVO, UIH ETOLO UVO MK YXNO PVOLXHOIEXUC UNEXWI VUISOVL; U SVWFP WZ EWP IOVHL ATWLO LWCO HFEK XE XL EW PVOYOIE HXLVFPEXWIL XI ETO LPUNO-EXMO NWIEXIFFM.

[Reply #732 on:]

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I'M AL GORE, AND THESE ARE MY VICE PRESIDENTIAL ACTION RANGERS;
A GROUP OF TOP NERDS WHOSE SOLE DUTY IT IS TO PREVENT DISRUPTIONS IN THE SPACE TIME CONTINUUM.

 

AOI FR FV QHAAFOV!  MJV MJ MGSJ HT MJ WOP RWJAJ CGPFJA.  VGC AOI "VHZBJOQ CJAAJBA"!  VG!

[Reply #733 on:]

This one was my personal speed record for a quote with no apostrophes...

 

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Say it in russian!
Ven ve voke up ve had these wodies.     
Now say "nuclear wessels"!
no!

and now, the short quote:
 

QV'Y FS YSSRSZ, FTV Q'A KVXMYQMN EM X NERDSZ.

[Reply #734 on:]

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Whee! I'm famous!

I only vaguely recall this line, and I forget the episode/context..

It'd be deeper, but I'm standing on a gopher.

 

YB'K HJJC XTJZPKBPLJZ, ANB YB KRLPVCK ZYMP AVC XTJZPKBPLJZ!

[Reply #735 on:]

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IT'S GOOD CHOLESTEROL, BUT IT SPREADS LIKE BAD CHOLESTEROL!

 

ZTBD SHC'UU JHXB JVOGUNDP ROJM LHV ODHZTBV ZOAZB HL AGBBZ, AGBBZ JODWS ... ROX!

[Reply #736 on:]

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Then you'll come crawling back for another taste of sweet, sweet candy... Bam!

And now for something completely different; I'm even leaving in the name of the speaker, though I wouldn't advise starting there...

 

UJDGKMV: (UOCYMK-TCVW) H'B UAHB UJDWP, PMU, H'B GJM VMDA UJDWP, DAA PCN CGJMV UAHB UJDWPU DVM ENUG HBHGDGHKZ, UC TCK'G GJM VMDA UAHB UJDWP OAMDUM UGDKW NO, OAMDUM UGDKW NO, OAMDUM UGDKW NO.

[Reply #737 on:]

That was way too easy.  I didn't even have to substitute letters.  I just recognized the quote right of the bat.  It may have to do with the fact that I have considered posting this quote a couple of times.     

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SHATNER: (SPOKEN-WORD) I'M SLIM SHADY, YES, I'M THE REAL SHADY, ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING, SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP.

And Here's a quote 
 

QCB YXR F JUMAFHU BSMB XCBZFOU BSMB ESFAO FZ M QFL, DXWDXCZ QCGGXXY!
MYO RSFES XYU JXEVUO IXCJ RXJAO?

[Reply #738 on:]

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BUT NOW I REALISE THAT OUTSIDE THAT CHILD IS A BIG, POMPOUS BAFFOON!

AND WHICH ONE ROCKED YOUR WORLD?

ABCD BE FGH; IBE’J KD LAMGDI, N’C LOGD MJ PDMLJ BED BF OL QRPP KD LSMGDI. LB TOLJ LRJ KMAU, DETBH JVD GNID.
CH MLL WML KPRLJDGL FGBC JWD LPRID!

[Reply #739 on:]

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Come on Fry; Don't be scared, I'm sure at least one of us will be spared. So just sit back, enjoy the ride.

My ass has blisters from the slide!

 

XK ACF CHUSFK KGI YIZOIJK JZXUI, QEK VSE OSZLSK SRI KGXRL: ZSJM JZEFGIF FJXFFSZF ... QEK YCYIZ JSPIZF ZSJM ... CRB FJXFFSZF JEK YCYIZ. MXO, AI GCPI C JSRERBZEU.

[Reply #740 on:]

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IT WAS ALMOST THE PERFECT CRIME, BUT YOU FORGOT ONE THING: ROCK CRUSHES SCISSORS ...
BUT PAPER COVERS ROCK ... AND SCISSORS CUT PAPER. KIF, WE HAVE A CONUNDRUM.

 

MY, RY EYQ LVYU UZFC S'J DYVVF RY NIXYPI S RY SC?
EIM.
UZFC SX S RY MYJICZSVD RSXXIPIVC?
CZIV S RYV'C LVYU CZFC.

[Reply #741 on:]

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So, do you know what I'm gonna do before I do it?
Yes.
What if I do something different?
Then I don't know that.

 

QHUK ZOJDH BXEQ, VKHHMEOVR TKXG SXZK DXOV-DXRM OHANHP. OXKG UOQ RUG UOQ RUQEH'R FXS, KHGHGFHK?

[Reply #742 on:]

Had a lot of trouble with this one for some reason, but I don't know why, it wasn't that hard... just tired I guess.

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I had trouble with this one for some reason; I got the S right away from the contraction, but didn't get far from just that. First time I focused on "UOQ RUG UOQ" but couldn't get anywhere; then "DXOV-DXRM" with no luck either.
Finally the third time. I noticed the huge amount of repetition in "KHGHGFHK" and relized it was a very strange pattern, with only 4 letters. Figured H for a vowel, guessed E, and from that (1e2e23e1) came up with "remembered." The rest was cake.

Dear Uncle Zoid, greetings from youir long-lost nephew. Norm and Sam and Sadie's boy, remember?

 

RKN, HZZU WKGGORCWBXZ HV IBRWCRJ.

MCTZ GV DBLZRXU! KF, NBCX, XFBX NBU FCXXCRJ.

[Reply #743 on:]

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NOW, BEES COMMUNICATE BY DANCING.  LIKE MY PARENTS! OH, WAIT, THAT WAS HITTING.

EZB'SS NP XWP YHRXHTG, EZB'SS NP XWP MPSTDPQE NZE, HGM EZB'SS NP XWP HSYZWZSTY, UZBS-AZBXWPM--
ZW, OZM, EZB'QP HSTDP. T APHG, XWHGC OZM EZB'QP HSTDP!

[Reply #744 on:]

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You'll be the captain, you'll be the delivery boy, and you'll be the alcoholic, foul mouthed--     
oh, god, you re alive. I mean  thank god you're alive!

 

PF YOR EX FGT ODRFLOVPOX XTYR, WED KLEBOBVW CPCX'F RTT PF.

[Reply #745 on:]

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It was on the Australian news, you probably didn't see it.

 

ADZ REDZWT KU QREQBUT DP ADZVRUWP, PVA. ADZ'T EQXU SD KU KWYMT MDS SD MDSYFU SEQS WUUWQ'R Q FAFWDHR.

[Reply #746 on:]

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YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, FRY. YOU'D HAVE TO BE BLIND NOT TO NOTICE THAT LEELA'S A CYCLOPS.

 

ATZV T WOPBYH! Z UYBA VLTV IBYUOQ. LZW YTIO ZW HBYUOQ.
IBYUOQW TNOY'V HBYUOQW! SFZV IOWWZYE AZVL IQ LOTH!

[Reply #747 on:]

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Wait a minute! I know that monkey. His name is Donkey.
Monkeys aren't donkeys! Stop messing with my head!

 

UZK BPTT YGHR P YPQTS? H DZKTJF'Y GHY P WKU ZCSA YGS GSPJ DHYG YGHR YPQTS.

[Reply #748 on:]

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You call this a table? I wouldn't hit a guy over the head with this table.

 

OYH, GJE TMYF, JVQ'H OAKV L ZXAVBEJD UVJTGFV QG QMAH BVU XGRG.

UMLQ EAE DGY TLJJ FV?

L XGRG. DGY WBGU? L XGRGQ-MGRG.

[Reply #749 on:]

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Gus, old chum, let's give a friendly welcome to this new robo.

What did you call me?

A robo. You know? A robot-hobo.

 

MZFS KFGYA F KFD SIND DYISNFV? VIAS BCN QCVU? WCMYN? CN MYNY OCI TIAS PCND MRSZ F ZYFNS BIVV CB DYISNFVRSO?

[Reply #750 on:]

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What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?

 

N MKJKJQKM JX QFUX; BAHQQX, EHDGKX-DCNIIKU, MNUUAKU PNGV EVAKQNGND. H YFFU MKESQANTHI QFUX!

[Reply #751 on:]

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I REMEMBER MY BODY; FLABBY, PASTEY-SKINNED, RIDDLED WITH PHLEBITIS. A GOOD REPUBLICAN BODY!

 

NZAEPMY! EY'F FNYJAKNH GEPMY, E MNRO GV KNYO, N YXV-ZEYOA WVYYZO VC FMNFYN NGK UH NZZ-AJFM UED YNSO. ZOY'F AVLQ!

[Reply #752 on:]

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Alright! It's Saturday night, I have no date, a two-liter bottle of shasta and my all-rush mix tape. Let's rock!

 

J NJMBE-KRAB BNBTFEZB QYE PEIBC JZ YBTB CE J PRZ HWRPDIRJW KYBI WRKBT.

[Reply #753 on:]

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I VIDEO-TAPE EVERYONE WHO COMES IN HERE SO I CAN BLACKMAIL THEM LATER.

 

RDGP! VDTS OABQGZTNTO PK AKVPQV, VRTKVATVD QTKVFNS YACCTNAP, LFBV WAIT VDT GKT A FBTO VG RGNI PV.

AKVTNTBVAKX. KG, RPAV, VDT GVDTN VDAKX ... VTOAGFB.

[Reply #754 on:]

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Whoa! They discovered an intact, twentieth century pizzeria, just like the one I used to work at.

Interesting. No, wait, the other thing ... tedious.

 

RTP'O GTSSC. CTMS FUX OID QUSNUQD RZJFTJUX'J JOZXX TP CTMS JZRD. IDC! JTLDTPD RSTFFDR U JIZPC RZULTPR SZPQ RTGP IDSD!

[Reply #755 on:]

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DON'T WORRY. YOUR PAL THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL'S STILL ON YOUR SIDE.
HEY! SOMEONE DROPPED A SHINY DIAMOND RING DOWN HERE!

 

MZ, KA, SM. XZFX CMYGN PBTYVPB BJXPBKBGA XVSA FXMKH, FSN ZFUB AMY EPVLBN XZMHB GFXBGA?
V'K SMX KFNB MW KMSBA! GBFUB KB FGMSB!

[Reply #756 on:]

That one went pretty smoothly, once I recognised the pattern of the first bit.

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Oh, my, no. That would require extremely tiny atoms, and have you priced those lately? I'm not made of money! Leave me alone!

 

VRKV CKV! FM DMSXVRPGZ!

P YPDR P NMQOF TQV RX'D ZMV VXGQCX!

I have a feeling this one'll be pretty easy.

[Reply #757 on:]

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That rat! Do something!
I wish I could but he's got tenure!

 

LOLVSPML WLA XM ELF TXAZ DL. X ZUOL BPDLAZXMW AP BZPT SPJ.

[Reply #758 on:]

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EVERYONE GET IN BED WITH ME. I HAVE SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU.

 

EYWW, XKA IOF'R JK EVKFJ EPRZ LKQYRZPFJ RVOMPRPKFOW.
O LAVSOIY-RK-LOFRO VKIDYR WOAFIZYV. PR IKQYL EPRZ RZVYY UKWWX-LYYDPFJ QPLLPWYL.

RZOR'L SAFFX!
 
IOVYSAW, LPV!

[Reply #759 on:]

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Well, you can't go wrong with something traditional. A surface-to-Santa rocket launcher. It comes with three jolly-seeking missiles.

That's funny!

Careful, sir!

 

ABB CDAE FB G HEDCGIE AJDA KE LJGCFHEM DHE KE BMCN
HEDC AHEDIOHEI.

A little different, this one is normalized instead of randomized. This is unimportant, except that a letter might be replaced with itself.