Futurama: Professor possibles - Post your suggested professor quotes here

Here are some I came up with...

"Good news everyone! I have just found myself...

Oh! How rude of me... Hello there!

Hello."

"It's about time we put these young whippersnappers in their place!

Except, they're already in their place being where they are.

Oh goodness, where was I going with this...?

Ah ha! I'm right here... That'll show me."

"Good news everyone! It looks like there's only one left... Hmmm. That's odd.

Oh dear, I see two more. That's STILL odd."

"Great news everyone! I've just proven that I'm always right.

I found it right here in my diary."

"Bad news no body… I’ve decided to finally step down as your steady and genius guide.

*crack* ooOOOOOOoh!

Good news everyone! I believe my artificial hip just broke.

Nevermind."

"Good news everyone! I have a profound revelation to tell you all now... years later we can test it with time to see if it stands."

"Oh... my aching polymer titanium reinforced artificial bones."